Advice Regarding Night Terrors

My oldest son did the very same thing and when the doctors told me it was normal I videotaped it to prove to her it was not normal. He would wake screaming for water at the top of his lungs and his eyes were wide open but he never looked at us. He always had his hands in the air screaming for water and when I tried to give it to him he didn't even act like he could see the water. The sound of voices only made him scream louder and kick and wave his arms around harder. When I showed it to the doctor she said yes that looks like a night terror (it also lasted around 20 minutes).

She told us that night terrors are not dreams like many people think. Night terrors are common in children and it is how the body reacts when the brain gets stuck between two stages of sleep. Nothing more than that. As crazy as she sounded I think she was right. He hasn't had one in several years.

One thing I noticed though was they happened more offten to my son when he had a stressful day. I tried changing my dicipline a bit and using more calm stern direction rather than getting him in trouble. I think that had something to do with it too because sometimes it happened more than once a night and when I mentioned that to the doctor she said if that is hapening it sounds more behavioral. A few months after that doctor visit they quit all together. I tried not to give him the oppertunity to get into too much trouble, be too busy, or get too tired in one day.

I have a 5 1/2 year old little boy who goes through the same thing from time to time. I have found it to happen much more when he is overly tired. If he remains on a schedule and gets a good amount of sleep from day to day he seems okay for the most part. That is the only real advice I have. I hate having to deal with it too. As a mom we are supposed to be able to "fix" everything and this is one of those we can't fix. Best of luck. Let me know if you find out anything else that helps. C.

Hiya!

Ok, I'm going to repeat a few things, but sometimes a combination of several suggestions is what works, so I'll risk it.

I had such horrible night-terrors as a kid the people in the apartments around us talked together and decided our parents were beating us, and they called social services! My mom couldn't calm me, and I was screaming as though I was being peeled alive, so it became an exercise in observation to see how she could make the fright stop. I asked her advice as we went through this with both of our girls.

1. The child doesn't see you, and in my daughter's case, I was a frightening monster trying to hug her!
2. Night lights and soft music help- don't know why.
3. If the child is flailing, you can use a small burst from a mister to startle them awake. I know I'll catch flack for that statement, but Mom had to do it when I was a kid, and I had one bout of window banging to deal with, so I used it- works wonders, and you don't have to get them wet- just a tiny mist.
4. Potty after wakey=good.
5. Don't turn on the lights! This can cause confusion more, as a child trying to regain conciousness can be confused, not knowing whether it's day or night, etc.
6.Talking to the child doesn't usually help, but if you can cover the child and quietly observe, do.

I'm sure there are other things I'm forgetting, but this is often a growth triggered phase, though I've heard of recurrence in adulthood. Just put up a child gate, nightlight, cd player with the *same* music (comfort from consistency-let it stop after once through at bedtime, start again if nt happen) and hang out quietly in the background if it happens, prepared to stop him if something dangerous starts.

Best of luck!!

R.

Wow it looks like you have gotten plenty of advise. My two year old son also had the same thing. I asked everybody for advice on what was happening and they all told me the same thing, to just let it run its course and that it would eventually go away. But I thought that they just didn't understand because when he had a night terror it was so scary and frightening. In the end the advice was great and he is now 3 years old and no more night terror,(for now!) so hang in there mama, just try to keep him from hurting himself, If you can don't touch him or talk to him.

http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/142.html

I read some things on this website that helped me. Good Luck!

Are you certain it is night terrors and not some sort of brain tremors? If it is indeed night terrors which it very well could be, I would definitely be asking my dr why is it my child is so susceptible to have vivid hallucinations that make him so scared he wakes up unable to communicate and come to reality. I would be very concerned as to what is going on in his brain. Have you considered food triggers or additives that are in foods as possible triggers? I know these can effect brain function quite dramatically. It may be worth looking into. Wow, you must be terrified watching him thrash about. You guys will be in my prayers!!!!!!! I certainly hope he doesn't get injured and these episodes end soon for your little guy. Good luck and God Bless!

B. :)

We had the same problem when our daughter was about a year old. She would just scream and had that "out there" look to her. I did some research on it and it said the best thing you can do is let it run it's course. I know how hard that is but honeslty once we did that it seemed to help. It only lasted about a month too. We also played Christian and classical music in her room, which also seemed to help. Not sure why but that seemed to "get it over with quicker."

Hi R.,
Another mom asked a similar question about a month ago.
I'll cut and paste my response to her for you. The only difference is, that since your son is only 2, he may not be potty-trained yet.

"Much like sleep walking, night terrors often happen because the child is transitioning from one stage of sleep to another, and ends up half awake/half asleep-- except that the "half awake" side isn't really "awake". His body "appears" as though he's awake but he's not, much like sleep walking. Have you tried talking to him during this time? If you've noticed that he can't really talk, or his talking doesn't make sense and is jumbled, or he can't answer a simple question then he's not really awake.
Our son and daughter both had a period of about a year,year and a half when they both were sleep walking. (Around age 8-9)They were often terrified and crying-- the looks of horror on their faces made us feel so badly. You could tell they were just mortified, but we couldn't calm them.
I read up on the subject through the internet-- you can just type "night terrors" or "sleep walking" in a search and you'll find several articles on the subject.
The one thing that really helped us, is something as simple as making SURE they use the restroom immediately before going to bed, not 20-30 minutes-- immediately. And don't let them drink anything too close to bedtime.
While they're sleeping, their bodies are "aware" that they have to "go"-- but they're in a deep stage of sleep. So the body wakes but the brain is still dreaming, and isn't conscious of the real world.
On the occasions when our kids still were sleep walking anyway- we just guided them toward the bathroom. One of the interesting things about all this, is that even though they can't communicate effectively during this state, they CAN follow simple instructions. So we just took them to the bathroom, told them to go potty, and almost the second they were finished, you could actually SEE their faces change, and they were suddenly awake-- consciously awake. They'd suddenly realize they were in the bathroom, couldn't remember getting there, or walking around, or being afraid--- nothing. Then they'd laugh and say "That's really weird!", go back to bed and be fine!
The good thing is that they outgrow it!!

Good luck! I also understand how you are feeling. Night terrors are like sleep walking. There is a genetic component, and it will run in families. I was a sleep walker and so is my mother. So far my daughter has had night terrors. We will go months without an episode, then there will be one every night for a week. For us it is usually only once a night (if she wakes up more than that it is uaually b/c she came to during the night terror, then she is all scared and anxious feeling and won't sleep well the rest of the night). We have found that for her, they are DIRECTLY related to growth spurts. She will have a night terror for a week straight, then poof.....all of her clothes don't fit!! It can also be a mental growth spurt, she will have a bunch of terrors, then all of a sudden she is using more words, can name colors, whatever.
The best thing I can tell you is pad the crib so he can't hurt himself to much (SIDS should be a problem anymore) and let him thrash...there is nothing you can do. But be prepared...there is a good chance he will be a sleep walker or sleep talker as he gets older!!!

I am so sorry to hear about this. I am sure it was hard for you to watch. As parents we want to be able to fix/console our children, we feel helpless when we can't. My doctor said to wake my son about an hour after he falls asleep, three nights in a row. She said it breaks the sleep cycle and can then break the terrors. Rouse him enough to where he can answer a question/look at you.
I also put a baby gate on my son's door. My Mom said when my sister had then she would walk her to the bathroom, something about the light and going pee pee got her out of them.
I pray this works for you.

I know this must be hard for you. I have a 9 year old son that would have nightmares when he was younger (not as bad as what you described). Also, my 3 year old daughter will sometimes wakes up screaming in the middle of the night. As hard as it is to do, I found that just letting them be works best. After they would quiet down then I would go in and make sure that they were OK. A night light does work well. Also, I always would play a CD of nusery music quietly for my daughter in her room. For my son he liked to listen to the sounds of nature, such as the ocean or the sound in the rain forest CD. Good luck to you.

This happened when my daugher was around 3 years old but hasn't happened for a while. I also found that it happened more when she was tired.

I researched it on the net at the time just to figure out what was happening and how to best handle it. Your doctor is right and that it's best not to wake them from night terrors because
1) they look awake already and by the time they REALLY are awake they are completely distraught.
2) they will be so disoriented that it takes longer to calm them down from that then just letting them be.

So when my daughter cried out of course it would wake me up, but I'd just go in to make sure it was a night terror and not her actually calling for me, but I'd leave her be. Okay, I'd cover her back up and rub her back and murmur that 'it's okay, I'm here', but I think that was more for my good than hers!

I don't remember the phase lasting too long, so maybe it's more common with young children and not something they'll exprience for the rest of their life.

Good luck,
J.

Night terrors frequently turn into sleep walking as a child grows older. I've suffered from this all my life and still have at least one episode every couple of months. Mine is usually giant spindly legged crawling all over the ceiling and me.

I've been to a number of doctors, but bottom line, without paying a fortune, this is the advice I've gotten. Don't disturb or wake your son. A night light helps because when you are awake in your dream, you see things layered over what is really there...if that makes sense. If it's a bit lighter in the room, you tend to focus on what is real much more quickly. When I was about 8 or 9 years old, I started jumping out of bed and running to escape the spiders, and once fell down the very long flight of stairs to the marble landing and broke my arm. So we had to put a baby gate in the doorway to keep me from doing that again.

I rarely remember much when I finally wake up (and have been very embarrassed like the first time I had one of these after I got married and scared my hubby half to death and of course my first roommate in college.)

Mine are worse if I'm extremely tired, haven't been sleeping well, or have a lot on my mind and am stressed. Nothing really gets rid of them or makes them less intense. The doctors say it's more stressful on the family than the person having them. I would say pad his bed really well and put a nice cushy rug next to his bed. Lots of pillows and a thick comforter would help, and just let him thrash.

Hopefully he'll outgrow this. Some people do, some don't. Good luck!

oh sweety your not the only one i have a now 9yr old daughter and she would have the same type of night terrors as you decribed but the dif was at the time i was a single mother of 19 and pg again we lived on our own at that time so i had no clue as to what was wrong with her i actualy took her to a therapist thinkng she was possesed(sp) (funny i know that now lol) but the doc told me to just hold on tight she'll grow out of it i was afraid i was going to hurt her because i held so tight but it was hold or she was going to do more damage to herself or me and the unborn but i did find out what was causing it (it was a blowup toy ) when we had that toy out to play with thats when she would have the terrors do you thin maybe it could be a toy ? it could be the doc him self or the shot but those you can't get rid of (lol) i know the kids would love it if we could (lol) but try dif things and see what happens who knows it could be something simple as a toy left out

R.,my daughter has had night terrors since she was 2 she is now 13,for the last few years she has not had them.They were bad at times crying non stop,she would not let me near her when she was having them.One night she said that my blood was all over the couch another time she was saying something about her cousin.The only good thing is that she never remembered having them.She also would sleep walk once in awhile she still does but not often.I remember one night I forgot to tell my husband that she has night terrors and she sleep walks we just started living together and she had one it scared him because he didn't what was going on.I got her calmed down and back to bed and told him what was happening so he new what to expect when it happened again.I also told her grandparents so they would know which is a good thing because she had them over at their house often.I understand what you are going through it is very hard and scary to see your child go through them the good thing is they don't remember anything and they think they slept all night.Hopefully he will grow out of having them like I hope my daughter will.If you ever want to talk about it I am here for you.Good luck I hope by telling you some of what I have been through helps.
J.

My daughter did the same thing. This last night terror you are talking about was probably due to the shots. There were days I knew my daughter would have one that night. Our doctor told us that if something happened during the day that really scared her it would set her night terrors off that night. She has since grown out of them. We were told not to try and wake her up and to turn the light on when she was having one that way if she did open her eyes she would not see any shadows. Also trying to pick her up or grab her only made it worse sometimes because she was still having her dream and not knowing it was you you trying to get her.

My son had these from 1 1/2 until 2 1/2 or so. most of what has been said below is what i found to be true. chances are, he'll outgrow it (mine did) and they are related to stress and not enough sleep. even when my son did not nap, i would have him do a quiet time that involved laying down, like watching a movie or reading a book with me. then, early to bed. every once in a while they would flare up, and you cannot predict when it will happen. i became a "slave" to the naptime/rest time. i put aside all my plans almost every day to make sure i was home for him to have his rest. and a decent bedtime...not 10pm or some time like that. 7:30 or 8pm.
it is scary to see and experience....but just try to remain calm (difficult!!!!) and keep your son safe, try holding him, even if he hits you. remember he is asleep, and he is not disrespecting you, he doesn't really know he's doing it. he probably doesn't remember it the next day, and talking to him about it it probably futile. just know that it will pass. hang in there, girl, i know it is scary.
BTW: in the long run it has not affected my son. he is now almost 9, he's in gifted program at school, and has a very sweet and friendly disposition. he sleeps great now!!! some days i can hardly wake him for school!!!
K.

My son went through the same thing, what worked for me was just picking him up without saying anything, and just taking him outside for a few minutes. Something about the cold air hitting him verses me trying to wake him worked so much better. He too wouldn't even recongize me and would just fight me. His phase happened during the spring so we were able to stay outside for a few minutes. And he fell back asleep right away.

He out grew it pretty fast, but those were some scary night till I found out what worked best for us.

Good Luck!

My son Jonathan will be 3 on Saturday. He has experienced night terrors from time to time, though none recently thankfully. The only thing that seems to cause them for him is a lack of a good nap. He seems to get them when he is overly tired. When we make sure he gets his naps, the terrors seem to go aware. I don't hink his are related to anything he sees or experiences, just a reaction to a lack of sleep. They are very scary and I am always glad when they are over because he is so frightened and nothing I do can help because he really is not seeing or reacting to me in any way. Good Luck!