Advice on Toddler Not Talking Much Yet

My son, who is now three, was late talker. I was worried and had him evaluted after speaking to his doctor, at 18 months and again at 2 years. Both times they said he did not qualify for services, even though he had only a couple of words. If you think there may be a problem, have him evaluated. It is free through the county and if there is a problem the earlier you start services the better.

At our oldest 18 months appt doctor asked me how many sentences he said....I could count words he said on 1 hand.....now at 3 1/2 he tested as advanced in his speech. Our youngest is 19 months old, he says: no, mama, that......that's it. I do not worry since I know he is just like his brother.When our God son was 16 months old, my husband would have an hour long discussion with him about a game(whatever they were watching).And he came from rough background where his mom was on druggs and he was left to himself a lot. SO I really think it depends on the child, you can ask him to repete words, but he will do it whenever he is ready.

T.,

I definitely agree that early intervention is a good thing. It certainly cannot hurt. My daughter had physical therapy through that program for 2 years and I have nothing but good things to say about it. I have a 19 month old who talks a lot, but every child is different and boys tend to be slower...that's why it is so good to get an early intervention evaluation...they see a broad range and can tell you if your son is actually behind and would benefit from therapy.

The other thing is, some people just aren't talkative. I have a friend whose son didn't start talking until almost 4 years old, but he is very smart and there weren't any speech issues. He is 17 now and rarely talks...he is just a quiet person...that is his personality. So it could just be a personality thing too.

The only thing I would worry about as far as not taking him to EI for an evaluation...if your doc wants you to do it and you refuse, and then it turns our there is an issue, he could potentially turn you in for neglect...ridiculous I know, but they do have that right, so I'd be careful about that.

D.

In my area, early intervention is free. It may be helpful to meet with a consultant and he/she can decide if your son needs early intervention.

My son was born 9 weeks early, and I saw an early intervention person who marked all his milestones up to age three. I am now working on seeing a speech therapist. I could wait to Kindergarten to get him speech, but I know that the earlier you get intervention, the quicker and easier it is to correct any areas that need correction. Also, this is a free service the community offers.

My son did not talk much. At his three year old appointment, I discussed this with his doctor, and she told me to hold off on finding assistance. About two months later, he started talking in full sentences using words such as pretending and annoying. Now, I just have to work on his speech so others can understand him too. He had a lot of ear infections during his first year, and this may have hindered how he learned his language skills.

Early Intervention can't hurt. It's not a bad idea to have someone evaluate him..

My girls are 20 months and talking in sentences. no 2 kids can be compared, but I beleive at that age the standard they say is like 10-30 words and starting to string 2 together..

well that seems a bit early to me.
Especially since he is able to say some words.
I would say that at this age as long as he is able to understand you and follow basic directions (like can you get the ball?) He is ok. My nephew didn't really start talking until he was 2.5 and he is about to turn 3 and you would barely be able to tell.
My sister had him evaluated around 2.5 and they said he was border line and didnt' qualify for services.
But- I also don't think an evaluation ever hurts, either.
What does your gut say?

It never hurts to have someone come do an evaluation to see if he can benefit. They will teach you things too. Please don't worry about it too much. My pedi said that kids that are behind in one area are usually ahead in the other. I bet your son is developing his motor skills, not verbal skills. Mine was the opposite, he developed verbal skills but motor was far behind. He's four now and is all caught up. Hope all goes well.

My son is very active & was not into speaking at all! He was walking at 8 months, running & flipping at 9 months & potty trained at 18 months. But he had no urge to say words. My pediatrician was concerned so at 18 months, (only 3 words, Mama, Dada & spiderman) we had the interviews for early intervention & he didn't qualify. I was never really concerned, but the fact that the doc & his day care provider were - it made me nervous. So again at his 2 year check up, he was supposed to be saying at least 50 words & at least 3 word sentences - he was still only at the 3 words. We were again referred to early intervention, but couldn't coordinate the interviews. Then all of a sudden, 1 month after his 2nd birthday, he starts repeating - everything.
Your son will talk when he is good & ready. I know it is difficult with the pressures of "he should be at this level & saying this". Super Y is a great program on PBS, really all the programs on PBS will help. As will being around other children. My son started daycare at 20 months & everyone said he would talk shortly thereafter. It took awhile & a lot of frustration because nobody knew what he wanted at school. But we would pronounce every little item & if he pointed to something, we would name it. It will happen. He was very excited when we could understand him. And now he won't stop!
Believe in yourself as a parent & trust your instincts. If deep in your gut, you think he may have a problem, there is no harm in having him interviewed - it is free. Einstein didn't talk until he was 5 - look how well he turned out.
Best of luck!

Hi T.,

Remember, every child is different. So please try not to compare your child to other children (so hard, I know). It will only make you more nervous to know what other children are saying when yours isn't saying much. And he's a boy - so you especially can't compare him to girls.

I think it's great that your son knows what words mean. That's very important.

Take the pediatrician's advise and get the intervention. I hear that it works wonders and those children do very well very quickly. He'll be a chatterbox before you know it. Good luck!

http://birth23.org/

Mom,

I can tell you from my own personal experience, he seems delayed, It could be as you said due to his premature birth, but I don't think so, I think it could be anything, and there is no sense in trying to pretend nothing is wrong or to try and figure out the reason on your own,

Your his mom, get moving, find out what it is , and IF ITS even anything at all, Before he is delayed even further making it harder for him to catch up.

NOW -- My 3 sons, all born healthy, thank god.
BUT my youngest had some delays,
I knew it,
I love him, but he just didn't develop like the others,
so I talked to the doctor, and the doctor said WAIT and SEE
I listened to her, and then listened to my heart
MY heart told me something was not quite right.

So i took steps, figuring worst case scenario something is wrong, and we'll deal with it,
But I would be darned if I pretended otherwise LOL

So I called on my own, ( Birth23 )
and they came and the evaluated, and they agreed he was delayed, they sent a therapist out once per week, and sure enough they fixed the problem. and now he is PERFECT.

---

Similar thing with a friend from a moms group, I met her, I I could tell something was off with her child, and I told her about my son, and then she confided in me about her concerns

She called, they evaluated and created a plan for treatment,
and it turns out because of his lack of speech they diagnosed and are treating him for autism,( this is not to say he is definately autistic because technically he was not diagnosed by a doctor, nor can he talk yet which is the number one reason he is being treated for autism, but they're coming to her house and the babysitters house for FREE 10 hours per week, and in 2 short weeks he has made some dramatic strides.

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So I DO NOT think your child has Autism, not saying that,

BUT i am saying he needs to be evaluated, regardless of WHY he is delayed, -- HE IS delayed and he needs some help.

that being said, I wish you all the best,

please call birth23, they'll come and create a plan IF you need one, don't wait, no sense in pretending, get him back on track, don't wait til he is so far behind his peers he can't cath up!!

Good luck MOM

M
Mother of 3 boys