Advice About Having a 3Rd Child

I raised two girls by myself. When the youngest was 16, I adopted a two year old girl. Am I sorry? NO! It was like having a second family. I was 43, a lot older than you and still single. I do not regret, nor have I ever regretted adopting my third girl. In fact, when she entered high school, I opened my own child care facility. Still no regrets. Now I help with my grandson. There are a lot of things I would like to do yet but I will never regret the choices I made involving children.

Hi Marisela,

I have 3 wonderful children ages 6, 4 & 2. I had my first when I was 31 and my youngest at 35, so don't think you are too old. I think each person's experience will be different and unique to their situation. I found that going from 1 to 2 children to be fairly easy, but the transition from 2 to 3 was more challenging for me. I think if we would have waited and spaced them out a little farther it would have been a little easier. With two, you have two hands to hold on to both of them, a double stroller will contain two children, etc. With three so close in age, it was much harder to go to the grocery store with a car seat and two toddlers. The grocery carts that have little ride in cars are a life saver. The two younger ones ride in the car and the baby's car seat fits in the cart. Anyways, if your husband will help you with the transition, it makes it much easier as well. Now that my youngest is almost 3, it has become a lot easier and I couldn't imagine my life without him. If you want another child, then go for it, you will never regret it! I wish you all the best! L.

We have four kids (8, almost 8, 4 and 3). I really hesitated about having #3, but I was glad I did. Then, I realized that there was a big age gap for her; 4 years) between her and the next before her - so we had her brother, baby #4! I am thrilled we have them all - each has somone close to their age to play with, and The oldest are 6 months apart (one is my stepson) and the youngest are 16 months apart.

So my advice would be to have (4) - LOL!

Good luck!

Hi Marisela,
My name is J. I am a mother of three and just found out we have number four on the way. We originally had two in mind but three happened. All three are very well behaved and close in age(4,1,5mos;boy,girl,girl). My son is already very overprotective and makes sure that his sisters are "ok" and he sings and plays with them. I do stay at home full time. As far as change with a third...it took a little longer to get a schedule but I established one and I even do FT online schooling. What is crazy is leaving the house! The packing and the hauling seems to take forever. Now we have to purchase a bigger vehicle and a bigger residence, which we sorta needed to begin with. But if your heart is in it,it's doable.

Hello! Well, let me tell you I am only 22 and I have 3 children, all 21 months and a few days apart. My oldest will be 5 the end of May, middle child is going to be 3 in a few days, and my youngest just turned 1 in December. My life is stressful and hectic, I think part of it is that I have 2 girls and 1 boy...the 2 girls being so close in age is what makes it hard for me. I think if you can get past the jealousy with your youngest and the baby, it should be okay. It takes patientience from all of the family. I think if you made it through 2 you can make it through another one.

Marisela,
You have to do what is right for you. I am 35 and pregnant with my third. I am semi-new to staying at home and already have a 12 and 4 year old. It was a huge decision for all of us but in the end, we decided that having another child was what we wanted. Some days - I am not sure it was the right decision to have any kids - lol Hope that helps...if you need to talk just let me know.
K.

Hi there, My name is T. and after haveing my two girls from a previous boyfriend, 5 and 3 1/2, I was worried about haveing a third with my new boyfriend. After all of my doubts I had my third and she is the light of my life. It's just kinda hard to remember that it is his first and he knows nothing about babies. The hardest part is remembering to let him make his own mistakes I have had two already and I want to correct him, but I know that I can't. I have to let him learn for himself. So If you deside to have a child by him don't forget to let him make his own mistakes. he has to learn the same way you did. But it is a wonderful experiance. My baby is 7 months old and I love seeing the two of them together. And my girls love it too. It's kinda a way to make the family his own. and yours' too. Don't forget to let him make mistakes or it will not work. If you have any more questions please feel free to contact me and I will let you know what ever you want.

Hi there! I'm a mother of 3 kids. My oldest will be 9(son) on Sunday, 71/2 yr(daughter) and 4 year old daughter. Some days I feel overwhelmed with them and others are just fine. It's one of those take the good with the bad deals. I wasn't planning the third child she was a happy surprise. I do feel that emotionally and financially she was the only one I was ready for. If both you and your husband decide that having another one is good, then do it. But if he is the only one that thinks it's a good idea you will end up resenting him because more than likely you will be dealing with all three kids way more than he will. I would sit down with him and discuss your thoughts about it. You may have fears that he can put to rest. Communication is key! Good luck.

Hi, Marisela. I gave birth to my third child in August and I am so in love with her! After two fantastic boys (ages 6 and almost 3 now) we wanted a little girl so much, and God graciously saw fit to give us the desire of our hearts. She was a total surprise, and I really wasn't sure I could handle another child. But surprisingly enough, you get the hang of it. I'm not going to lie to you - now that the kids outnumber the parents, it's most definitely more hectic in the house, and it's difficult sometimes to know that all three are getting enough of my attention and diligence. The hardest part for me is actually the noise level. (I'm a quiet person and my children really are not - especially my oldest, who I swear is a fire alarm in a first-grader's body.) But seeing the interaction among my sons and their new sister is priceless, and I so enjoy watching all of them grow up together. I tend not to enjoy my time out of the house with all three of them as much without Daddy with us to help ensure everybody's safety and cooperation, and don't get me started on grocery shopping day. But I've learned so much about my own abilities and about trust, and sometimes I think each of my three cherubs is a better teacher to me than I am to him/her. And how many lessons would I be missing out on if one of them wasn't here?

Now...if I had the chance to do it all again, would I make the deliberate decision to have three? You bet! I wish you and your family of four - or five - the very best. ;) Lots of grace to you.

~ R.

I just had my third 8 weeks ago. My older girls are 5 and 3 (turned 3 at baby's birth). So the spacing would be similar. AND I'm 32, which I think is young b/c I never thought I'd have my first til my 30s! Anyhow, people told me three was so hard, you're outnumbered, etc. But b/c my older girls have each other to play with, it's not been so bad. I can give them a project or activity and they can ply together. Sometimes they fight instead and that drives me batty, but that's normal. They also looooove their little sister and they are eager to "watch" her if I need to distract them. So in many ways it was EASIER than having #2. AND as a parent, you're much more relaxed about things by the time #3 comes around!

BUT immediately post partum I definitely needed help. Someone to take care of my older girls. Good luck in your decision. Only you know what's right for you and your family.

I just had my 3rd 10 months ago. So now I have a 5y, 4y, and the baby. I'm not going to lie; it's pretty crazy!!!! If the first two get along good and can keep each other occupied, it helps a lot. I wouldn't change it for the world even though I have the most high maintainence third you could ever imagine. I think you know when you are done having kids, you just feel it, and if you don't know for sure, go for it. My hubby still wants more.....so I'll be writing for advice on the 4th...:)

Hi. I am a sahm of 2 girls, 7 and 5. I am 36 and my husband and I still want a 3rd. I would wait and time it so your little 2 1/2 year old is in preschool. It would make it easier. Us mommies have good days and bad days. It doesn't seem to make a difference if we have 1 or 5. Hope this helps. Good luck to you.
(o:

I have 4 girls and one boy. Yes the transition from two to three children would have to be the hardest from my view point. The juggling of their needs is much more complex and it takes some planning to accomplish trips out. One of the other things is, having three children means that one will be in the middle. On the bright side though, it seams that after the third child, the transition with having more children is not that bad. You become a good multi tasker. Good luck

Well, the only thing I can say is to do what is best for your family.

I am 37 years old and gave birth to my third child in November. She was a surprise but I couldn't be more in love and happier. My oldest, a 10 year old boy is great and very helpful with his two sisters ages 5 years and 4 months old. My husband of almost 12 years is so supportive and is a great provider.

I am able to stay home with my children which is very important to us.

I am very happy with my choice to have a third child. All my kids are just under 2 years apart. Their ages are 2, 4, and 6 months. Sometimes it's hard out in public, but my four year old is a big help. Sometimes he "mothers" my 2 year old and can get a little bossy. And we by no means stay home. I usually take my double stroller everywhere- just in case, and I love the carts with the double child seat at Costco!
I think your little ones are at agreat age for a new sibling.
The way I look at it is that I'm getting the diaper stage over at once. I'm here if you need support- or a playdate!