Adjusting to Pre-K

Keep taking him. The crying will subside as time goes on. It can take up to 4 weeks. His teachers should be able to get him involved in an activity that he enjoys when you drop him off. My guess is that he is worried about what you are doing when he is at school and he may miss out or even thinks that you will be sad without him. Reassure him that you are only going home to clean the house or spend a boring day at work, whichever is the case. I have been a preschool teacher for some 10+ years and a mother of four grown children.

Tell him what a big boy he is and how proud of him you are.......talk about the great things he will learn in school, just like you did......and the how you have all these great hopes for him to become the best man he can be.........

Also, get his clothes out the night before, so he can help pick out what he wears, tell him you want him to look nice for all the friends he is going to make........and talk to him about telling you what he has learned that day......or what might be coming up to learn.......

Be sure to talk to him about making friends at school and you can't wait to see him when he gets home so he can tell you all about what he did that day........and again how happy you are that is such a big boy.....

You get the idea.....you might also try doing some "school" work at home to help.......also be sure to tell him how important it is to learn and listen......that this is his job now......just like you have jobs too....taking care of him, etc....

Good Luck and take care, he'll be fine....hang in there.

My comment isn't going to be popular, but I honestly believe having our kids in day care early helped them with this.

One of our kids, our 4 year old, is not good at transitions away from what's normal. However, he surprised us last week with a seamless transition from one day care class to the other (the previous transition was less than ideal).

Our daughter's a different kid (2 years-old) and moves without any issues.

So, part of it is likely his personality, part of it is that this is such a major transition based upon likely being with you one-on-one almost exclusively (with social interactions included) to being without you.

It's going to take time. The preschool teachers will be best to give you ideas and assistance. But, what helped us when we went through this in December with our son was to keep asking about his day, what he did that was fun, who the kids in his class were that he liked playing with. We took treats into the class on a few occasions (stickers to share, food items, etc) so he had more of a reason to interact.

Ultimately, the teachers learned what made him tick and helped bring out the best in him. The same will happen for your son.

I give you credit for putting him into a program before Kindergarten. Our neighbor's son just started Kindergarten 2 weeks ago. He's been at in-home day care (basically like Grandma taking care of him and his little sister) his whole life. And, the transition was AWFUL. Week 2 was better, and now it's a breeze.

Good luck.

Every kid is different and adjust to things differently. Know that it will get better with time. Talk to him, draw pictures with him about school, explain how much fun school can be, explain why he has to go to school, be consistent, supportive, loving and cross your fingers things go well. There are tons of kids books available that the two of you can read together that might help. Check your local library.

Also, I would ask the teacher what suggestions she might have to ease the transition - I'm sure she's seen this dozens of times before and so she can be a great source for help.

The pacifier - yes, he needs to be done with that. Again, there are some great kids books to help with this too. I say set a deadline to get rid of the pacifier, tell your son what this date is and keep talking about it. For example, with the next birthday/holiday, etc. say okay Halloween is coming and as of that date the pacifier will be gone because you won't need it anymore. Another option that I know one mom did was cut the ends off all the pacifiers in her house and so they wouldn't work right anymore. At first her daughter sucked on them, but after a few days she stopped.

Good luck!

Children who use a pacifer, and don't want to give it up may have cranila faults- and that needs to be fixed so that they don't NEED it. Check with the International Chiropractic Pediatric Assn for a referral.
For now give him the pacifer when he gets home.
It is sad that we all have decided that pacifers are baby things, or whatever- when the complusion to use on is based on a physical problem- this is where thumb sucking starts.
Best, k

He needs to be evaluated for Sensory Processing Disorder by a qualified occupational therapist. They can give you a sensory diet of activites to do with him before school and at home to get his central nervous system adjusted and ready for teh day. Some kids are too under or over stimulated and vestibular and proprioceptive input helps them to process sensations that most people take for granted automatically. For these kids they are in a place of fight or flight all the time because theor brains are telling them to go into protection and survival. Do not listen to people who say he will get over it. He may do so but the hidden handicap will just morph at a different level.

I just went through this with my 4 year old and it was really tough at first. Luckily he has an excellent teacher who was very experienced and after about 2-3 weeks he started transitioning better.
I love all the posts so far about staying positive and helping to get as much of his preparation for the morning done ahead of time so his mornings go smoothly. One "trick" that worked great too was letting him help pack his snack in his lunchbox. I got these health snacks called Gudernoobs that are packaged to look like candy and he thinks they are a huge treat. I'm trying to get my local Whole Foods to carry these snacks made by WooHoo Foods, but until then, I'm ordering them online.
I give you sooo much credit for persisting with your son. In the end this will benefit him greatly. He looks to you for guidance so as long as you keep a smile on your face and stay positive, he'll come around.