ADHD Medication Help!

Updated on March 12, 2009
K.D. asks from Phoenixville, PA
20 answers

I have a 14 year old teen with ADHD, he has been on medication for several years. He now completely fights me on taking this, he hates the side effects ie. not eating, feels skitzy, no socialization. Most recently his school couselor stated that my son has been withdrawn and does not participate at all in school. I have tried him off the medicine with a result of poor grades. We have tried a lot of different medicines and they all have the same side effects. I am looking for any suggestions because I am completely frustrated.

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J.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

I once had a student in my class who would have a cup of coffee before school and his parents would bring him one again late morning before lunch and it kept him on track wihout drugs. Good Luck.

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N.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi K.!
As I am not in your situation (my daughter is only 6 months), I am a mental health worker and am familiar with your issue... There could be other reasons for your son not wanting to take his medications such as, his friends saying things about him being on "meds", but I'm sure suffering with the many side effects of ADHD meds is not pleasureable either. You mentioned that he is becoming withdrawn and having problems with school... Does you son utilize a counselor as well as his medications? At the agency I work at, it's pretty common that meds are accompanied by therapy at least 1x a week (or as needed). I may look into that route only because maybe there's something else going on that your son may not be comfortable telling you about (because no kid is comfortable telling EVERYTHING to their parents). Another idea is talking to his prescribing doctor at his next medication check and letting them know about him not wanting to deal with the side effects anymore, and also about his social withdraw because that can be a sign of depression/anxiety and other medications will help with this.
I hope this helps! We see this pretty frequently in our office so don't feel that you guys are the only ones :)

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S.W.

answers from Philadelphia on

I second the counseling.

AD/HD is for life. And while they are younger, kids may need the medication because it is more difficult for them to self-regulate.

But medication isn't magic pill that suddenly makes everything 'normal'.

If he doesn't want to be on medication for the rest of his life, and even if it is something that will always factor in for him, he needs to learn the tools to help him stay organized, on task(or at least be able to come back to a task a complete it) and to respond appropriately in social settings.

There are a myriad of other complications that go along with AD/HD'ers. I know, I'm married to one, but we all have our weaknesses that we have to learn how to overcome or manage to our benefit. I personally think it is better for children to come into adulthood with these tools already instilled. So when they get to college or get their first real job and they have interviews(Which AD/HD'ers usually aces b/c they're so congenial) and meetings, they know how to self-regulate in the best way for them.

Counseling, especially with someone who has experience with AD/HD'ers could be highly beneficial to him. Whether it is just to help him deal with the reality of his disorder, and the fact that it may require him to take medication indefinitely, or whether it is to help him learn to function according to the demands of life(school, chores, appropriate behavior, etc.) without medication.

Also, if you haven't previously, check out www.additudemag.com This site has a ton of great info. I find their forums especially helpful. Similar to mamasource, but for those dealing AD/HD issues in self, spouses, and children.

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A.D.

answers from Philadelphia on

My son has been taking medicine for years for ADHD. He is 15. We have tried a lot of different kinds, with mixed results. He has been taking a low dose of Focalin (extended release) for several years. That seems to work well -- he has an appetite, has friends, and does well in school. He doesn't complain about side effects.

Hope this helps!
A. D

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A.F.

answers from York on

My parents tried all different kinds and dosages of ADHD medications for me when I was a kid and I hated them all. I think your son is old enough to tell that he is not himself on the medication. You may want him to do well in school but is it worth changing the person he really is and him being unhappy everyday? My parents had success in atleast getting me to pass classes with appropriate rewards. Pick something that he would really like and use positive reinforcement instead of punishments. Use short term as well as long term goals and rewards. In high school at the end of every week my teachers wrote a review of how I was at school and how my school work had been. As long as I participated in all my classes and attempted all my school work I was allowed to go out that weekend. If I passed all my classes I got to go on an awesome vacation that summer. I got to be myself without all the unbearable side effects of the drugs and I was encouraged to do my best in school. Good luck and I hope your son is able to get off his medication soon.

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K.B.

answers from Harrisburg on

This age is frustrating. My oldest is now almost 22 and he had ADHD and ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder). Pure hell. He was on meds until he took himself off them at age 13. I would give him his pill in the morning and assumed he took it. I'd later start seeing them in the garbage. So I started giving them to him and watched them go down his throat. I didn't notice his attitude get better so when I questioned him about it he flat out said he stopped taking them. I asked how when I saw them go down his throat. He said, "I got rid of them." How? He proceeded to tell me that when he got to the bus stop he'd go behind a tree and throw up to get rid of the pill, every day. So, that was that with medication. He was my problem child and we did EVERYTHING that was offered, and nothing helped him. Long story. But today he's a Marine, married and has a daughter.

I have a 13 year old who has ADD, no hyperactivity. His is a much more mild case of lack of concentration and organization. The meds help him. He's on Concerta. Every medication will work different on every child.

One thing you must be sure of is that your son is taking his meds every single day. These are controlled substances and if he takes it one day and not the next you will see mood swings and bad side effects. I just went through this with my 13 year old. So my husband has to make sure he takes his pill consistantly every morning. These pills must be weened off when they stop taking them, so suddenly stopping can cause a problem.

Also, your son at age 14 may not want to take pills anymore. This is the age when they want to quit them, so he may be exaggerating his side effects in order to get off of them.

Be sure to check all avenues. If his grades are down then go in connection with the school to have him evaluated and even put on an IEP for help until he learns methods to help him do things on his own.

I feel that it's important for a child with ADD/ADHD to see a counselor and psychiatrist on a regular basis, so any emotional problem is being addressed, and the medication is being thoroughly addressed as well.

When you use the parents, school, counseling, doctors and child in concert together, you'll get better results.

Good luck!

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HarrisburgPAChat
chat and events within 2 hour radius

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T.Y.

answers from Philadelphia on

I don't have any experience with this but I know many people that have had experience treating all kinds of problems with nutritional changes. I know one mom who cut out red dyes and other additives and her child did much better without medicine for ADHD. You should try to find something on the internet about what additives and products to cut out and which vitamins/minerals to add. Maybe it can help.

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V.W.

answers from York on

K.,

I don't know first hand about dealing with ADHD. I do know recently a product was released for children. It is an OPC based product, that helps children's nurosystem. It helps in aiding them to be healthier. I was just reading it the other day. I can send you some info if you would like. Anything is worth a try. THere was severl positive feed back with them.

V.

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S.E.

answers from Allentown on

My family physician treats this with dietary and nutritional supplements! Her name is Elaine Hardy, RN, MSN, APN, C and her website is: www.holisticfamilyhealthcarepc.com If you don't live nearby she will do the initial evaluation, order some testing and then do phone/email follow-up consults! She is great and really listens to what you are saying. She has wonderful success rate too! She's also a mamasource member!!

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L.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi K.,

I have a daughter with severe ADHD. She tops the charts and we've dealt with all of it. She is 16 right now. We have had the same issues with medications.

It is true that when she was in 7th grade, the medications helped her to get better grades. However, the side effects were so awful for her. She was moody and suffered from migraines. We tried many different kinds of meds and they had various levels of help vs side effects. I finally made the decision in the end that the benefits weren't worth it for her. The doctor disagreed with me, but he didn't have to live with her. She was missing at least one day a week of school due to migraines and that just wasn't okay with me.

She still does suffer with her grades. She struggles to pay attention and to remember her homework and etc. She struggles with the relationships with other students from time to time as well. But, there is marked improvement every year. She is learning what works for her and what she needs to ask for to get the help she needs. She is learning how she learns and what she can do to help herself study and remember. We keep a planner and a schedule, and I try to check in with her to make sure she is getting what she needs to get done done.

Sometimes you can try dietary changes and/or some kind of schedule. For example, my daughter is allergic to gluten, and when she eats it, she has more trouble concentrating. Also, we have found the caffiene is a big help. Sometimes before she has to concentrate on a task, she will drink a cup of coffee.

For us, the medications just don't have enough benefit to outweigh the negative side effects. So, we have to find creative solutions to deal with the reality of who she is and what she needs. I'm sure that I have adult ADD as well, so I can definitely relate to how she feels, and how frustrating it can be.

And I also try to focus on her strengths. I try to honor her energy needs and her creativity and her musical ability, and try to help her see that these skills, although not measured on standardized tests, are still real and measurable gifts that will help her in her life. She can conpensate for whatever she is weak in with something she is strong in, like creativity and resourcefulness.

I'm sorry that I may not be alot of help, but I just wanted to say that it is possible for the child to find individual compensations, and when they are exercised, the child can work to improve by themselves. After she went off the medications initially her grades did plummet, but she has worked to improve. She doesn't qualify for honors, and she is struggling to pass one of her classes, but she is doing well (B's or better) in all of her other classes. And she has a lot more self confidence now as well. She even plans to go to college.

I'm proud of her. She is such a remarkable kid.

Hope that helps,
L.

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L.P.

answers from Harrisburg on

Hi K.,

Has he tried Stratera? It is a medicine for adhd, but unlike the other medicines stratera does not have a stimulant in it. I do not know anybody that is on it, so I do not know how it may affect him.

L.

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

It depends on your goal, since you are in charge of him. If you intend to act as if he will beat this one day and not be medicated forever, then you need to decide when he will cease the meds. Why not let him try now? Or give him a to do list and a trial deadline, like improving all the other lifestyle factors that do aggravate this condition (you've seen them all listed) since many people overcome it when these are changed, and then letting him stop when he's doing better with these other things. Diet especially. Achieving good grades is not a good enough reason to continue if he is feeling depressed and unhappy with himself. The depression with himself over the meds will affect the grades sooner or later anyway. Eventually he will have to learn to accomplish work even with his added burden, and letting him try might boost his esteem. No matter what one believes about meds, it isn't good for a child (young man) to feel forced onto meds.

If you have already tried everything, and you have an immaculate toxin free highly nourishing diet, you've detoxed him from each med for a few months in between taking them, and you know he has all his sleep and structure and exercise in place and you know that his life (not just your life) is hell because he cannot function at all whenever he's off meds, then basically you're not intending to let him stop. Especially if you feel his condition is the same as his dad's and you trust your doctor completely that he will probably always need to be medicated. In that case, since he's not allowed to stop taking the meds, you need to act accordingly and get him help with accepting your decision by whatever means, and let him know in a few years he can make his own choices about it. A counselor may be able to help him not beat himself up over taking them.

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J.A.

answers from Philadelphia on

Have you considered putting him in counseling so that he can deal with his frustration for having to take a medication for his ADHD? I know adults that need help coping with the fact that they are taking medications for various things.

Sounds to me that he needs to learn some helpful coping skills for getting through this tough time.

My friend's husband was on ADHD meds growing up and is completely off of them now as an adult. So, your son can hold onto the hope that this won't last forever. Sometimes it is just hard to have that perspective when (1) you are a teen and (2) you are really frustrated.

Good luck to you both.

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L.S.

answers from Lancaster on

I beg you to go to amazon.com and buy and read the book "Healing the New Childhood Epidemics" by Dr. Bock. He is an MD, and has helped children recover from AD/HD. The info in this book can help you learn to treat the causes of his issues, not just medicate the symptoms. There is ALWAYS hope.
http://www.ritalindeath.com/

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L.H.

answers from Reading on

Hello,
I've have found success with my daughter using the following. A multi vitamin, multi mineral, digestive enzymes, and tyrozene 500 mg (this is an amino acid that with help with attentiviness) My daughter stoppe taking it because she realized she wasn't as fun. But I used this for several years. It does work! Your son is smart, the side effects are nasty and you need to work with him on this. A lot of times they outgrow it too. You could start conservatively and add to, but be sure to use the tyrosine. It sounds like he would be willing to do something different, and just because he didn't do well the last time, he now is not doing well on it. Try and help him with the adjustment too. Talk to him about the changes he might feel coming off the meds, and that you want him to be open and most of all be available to talk to him and listen. AN open dialoge is your best defense. It's very dangerous to put kids on mind altering drugs and the changes he is undergoing naturally at 14 don't mix well. I've done all this too, I've seen rage, depression and suicidal tendancies on these meds. THese just aren't an option. With your son's withdraw is he becoming depressed on these meds? Ya have to wonder. Good luck, I know my suggestion works.

L.

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J.L.

answers from Altoona on

DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor, and I am not qualified to give medical advice. (Come to think of it, neither are most ‘doctors’… :P

You should always get COMPETENT medical advice before changing any medication or altering anything or going against a doctor’s recommendation, no matter how idiotic it is.

I take no responsibility or liability from the use or misuse of this information.

(But if you follow it and cure your kid, I’d like a bag of home made cookies please.) Mint Chocolate chip would do nicely. ;)

The following is a personal OPINION. Take it as such.

First a little bit about me: I’ve been studying Autism for the past decade, along with ADD, ADHD, Aspberger’s Syndrome, etc. I’ve helped quite a few people understand the causes, effects, and reasons these disorders exist.

I think your 14-year-old son may be on to something here.

He feels out of ‘control’ with the medication, and hates the feeling of being dumbed down that it gives him. He is not alone. No one should have to live drugged up.

I personally know people who have ADHD, and they all tell me the same exact thing:

Dump the medication.

No one was born to be drugged for the entirely of their lives, and especially with something so easily workable as ADHD. Not easily workable you say? I’d counsel that it is because you’ve been given incomplete or wrong information. My question to you is:

Do you want to help your son overcome this challenge? Because at the risk of wounding parental ego, that’s all it is. It isn’t a ‘disease’. It isn’t a ‘disorder’. It’s simply a CHALLENGE to be overcome.

I’d recommend two things here.

1.) Heavy metal detoxification. This will remove most of the mercury, aluminum, and other toxins from your son’s body. (And yes these are toxins. Neurotoxins in fact that have a deleterious effect upon the brain.) There are many different ways to do this, and a world of information is at your fingertips on the internet merely for the looking. Even those ‘Chinese’ foot detox pads will help. They aren’t perfect, but they DO help. Something that has worked for me is a product called ‘Not Nice to Toxins’. It’s great. You can find it by doing an internet search on it.

2.) Change of diet. What is he currently eating? My friends who have had Autism (yes, that word is ‘had’, as in past-tense, have it no longer), and ADHD, have reported that a mostly organic diet, especially ‘gluten free’, if available, helps immeasurably. I have one formerly autistic friend who tells me that she improved 90% once she was off the meds, did a heavy metal detox, and changed her diet to organic. The foggy-headedness was gone, her memory and clarity increased, and she became healthier than she ever was in her LIFE, even without exercise. Just these changes balanced her out. She exercises now with an exercycle but that’s the extent of it, and this woman is incredibly healthy and looks radiant.

Someone said ‘AD/HD is for life.’ With all due, and absolute respect, I challenge that statement. I challenge anyone who says that ADHD, ADD, or Autism for life to tell me why this is, and more accurately, WHAT it is?

You’ve no doubt been told that Autism, ADHD, and ADD are ‘genetic disorders’ by your doctors. And that ‘There is no cure for Autism…etc.’

The vast majority of neurological disorders are caused by… you guessed it… NEUROTOXINS.

These challenges are caused by an imbalance in our body’s equilibrium, both by toxins in our bodies, and our massively over-processed ‘western’ style diets. In short, we eat a LOT of junk that Mother Nature never intended. (Mercury laden High fructose corn syrup anyone?)

This can be completely removed by a simple change of diet with added Omega 3 fatty acids over the periods of a few months, and slowly reducing the medications until they are eliminated.

But just adjusting the diet to be more organic should help EXPONENTIALLY, if you do nothing else.

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D.L.

answers from Philadelphia on

Besides the diet changes you might try acupuncture and craniosacral therapy. I am an OT/Massage therapist/acupuncturist. I have a friend who's son has ADHD. Over the years he has gone through a lot of treatments and meds. After having acupuncture he says he can really think clearly and calms down. Acupuncture modulates the central nervous system. Private sessions can be expensive but you can google community acupuncture to find clinics that offer low cost acupuncture. www.upledger.com is a website where you can get information on Crainiosacral therapy. It is a gentle hands on treatment that helps a broad aray of issues ADHD being one. Go under the find a practitioner section, put in your city and state and it will give you names of practioners near you.

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S.R.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I have to say my advice does not come from personal experience either.However,from what I have read and seen in many people,ADD/HD can be controlled completely by better vitamins,not drugs.I shop at a wellness company that has been in business for 24 years now,and has experience remarkable growth,as people look to live a greener life.A lot of add is caused by chemicals,and toxins in our homes in the products we use.Do some research and you will likely be alarmed by what is in not just cleaning and laundry products but also shampoo,toothpaste,soap etc.
I would love to share some information with you to help your help lead a normal drug free life.
www.SwitchStoresForHealthyLiving.com
www.formykidssake.com

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J.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

I am not sure that I have any advice but I feel for you. I have a soom to be 12 yr old daughter and sometimes (rarely) She will give a little struggle or just flat out states she hates taking meds. I don't know how I would survive without her taking meds. I guess I would suggest seeing a counsler and seeing if they can give your son some suggests or strategies on how to control himself to stay focused and whatnot without meds. Kind of put the responsibilty on him. And talk to the dr. about trying something new. My daughter is on Vyvanse and it has been working wonderfully. I know the struggles of having a child with this and it is trying and h*** o* not only the child but the whole family. A lot of time I ask myself how God thought I was strong enough. Everytime a change in med comes it is not something I look forward to. Good luck in what you decide.
J.

S.Y.

answers from Pittsburgh on

K.:
In regards to a member who claimed the wearing of a Konoki footpad could cure your son, here is the following:

A little research into how the body detoxifies (the liver) will tell you that the whole idea of removing "toxins" from the bottom of the feet is completely false. The surface of the pad picks up dead skin and dirt, and a chemical on the pad ensures the color. Repeated use of this pad will clean your feet, but nothing else. It is known that when water is applied to the pad, it will turn brown. It may be only affective is slowly hindering the sweat glands in the feet over time. It would be an explanation for the lightening each day.

And because of the sheer ridiculousness of that member's claim, I'd take the rest of her "non-medical" medical advice with a grain of salt.

Oh, and if the above regarding Chinese detox pads is treated with skeptisism, try pouring distilled water onto a pad. You will achieve the same "amazing" results.

I'd really get advice regarding this topic from someone who has actually been to medical school and not just "researched" the topic on the internet.

Love and laughter,
S. Y :)

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