Adhd - Layton,UT

Updated on October 20, 2006
S.W. asks from Layton, UT
15 answers

I have my son on medication for his ADHD and I feel like a bad person because I'm medicated him for this. I've heard so many diffrent things about these meds and I'm not sure what to do. He is still struggling in school and is in resource classes. I thought they was suppose to help children do better and I don't think it is. I just need some suggestions on what else I can do for this because the meds don't seem to be helping him anyways.

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Thank for all of the advice from everyone. I will try some of these suggestions and see where this goes.

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D.R.

answers from Provo on

hi S.,
my son is 8 years old and is adhd, we didnt want to medicate him, but we did find and herbal supplement called listol if you son can swallow a pill, because this is the only form it comes in. we started him on them in kindergarten and after about a week we could see a huge difference, we went from having a daily talk with his teacher to him getting praise almost daily on his behavior.
you can order this online through a company called progressive health. good luck!

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R.F.

answers from Pocatello on

hi S.,

don't feel bad for giving him medicine, it truly can help. if you feel that it's not, and that the resource classes are not helping, then by all means - change something!

my husband uses ATTEND now, and i have seen a huge difference in how he reacts to things and concentrates. it has a lot of micronutrients as well as vitamins that seem to help.

if you want to know more about it, http://www.vaxa.com/636.cfm that should give you a good starting place.

counselling can help as well, since it can give some good feedback

i hope you find some things to help out, i know ADD can be made to seem bad and scary.

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S.L.

answers from Portland on

Hey S.,
First of all don't put yourself in that situation on feeling like a bad mom for trying medication with your child. Sometimes that is all that works. Granted there are times when a strict diet change can improve the behavior, and I would encourage giving that a shot. But do monitor the medication and the behaviors, sometimes it does take several months, and several different types of medications before you find the right one for your child. I have 3 boys on ADHD meds right now and they are all on a different one. I would set up a medication management appointment with the prescriber and we would talk about how the last few weeks were and go from there, and they did have blood work done. Also I do not allow many sweets or much junkfood in my house, and I limit pop. I buy lots of organic "sweets" and I will spend about 1 day a week baking cookies or some kind of treat, and that way I control what goes into them and I can make substitutions, the kids never noticed a difference and we both get when we wanted. Although for my boys they do still need medication to completly control the behaviors, the are on smaller doses, and they still get to feel like themselves.
Good Luck to you!

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A.M.

answers from Salt Lake City on

S.,

I haven't read all the posts. (I have ADHD and lost focus LOL) I have a son and daughter both with ADHD, they show different symptoms and as one mother said the needs can be different based on the symptoms. I do not medicate either child by choice and I support parents who choose either method. Taking care of your childs need doesn't make you a bad mother, it makes you a wonderful mother. There is plenty of great advice here and so I will just throw you some tricks I have learned. I don't know how old your son is but mine is 7, so I am telling you as a mother of a younger child and I don't know how it will apply to a 13 year old.
1. ADD and ADHD children and adults are often VERY intelligent. My son especially struggles in school because of bordom. Putting him in resource classes made it worse even though we didn't realize it. When he was constantly challenged he actually became MORE responsive and patient. I had to fight the school to the end on this. It is a disability according to the law and a child must be accomidated. They had to put him in more challenging classes.
2. I bought him fantasy books from the"Adventures of Droon" series. He is 7 and not only is he now reading WELL above grade level, he sits in his reading zone and reads for hours. He is also calm when he is done, unlike TV watching.I think it is the complexity of a fantasy world that helps him to keep his mind busy and excited.
3. Food does matter. Proven or not I see a dramatic difference.
4. Accomadate his thought process to a point. He will be more comfortable with quick precise thought and direction, and then when he is in a situation where accomadation cannot be made he will learn to be patient.

I know it helped us to explain to my son that he was special because he was soooo smart that his brain worked faster and on more at one time than the average person. We call it his super power and treat it as a blessing. I tell him that just like any super hero if you don't control your power as much as possible you can upset people.I know your son may be to old for that but the idea is the same. He needs to know that he is smarter than the average kid, not the other way around. maybe this helps and maybe not but it has been a long road and lesson and I hope something I have said will make your life easier. Making sure he knows he is special and not stupid is so important because as much as you sound like a good loving mother, others will treat him like he is frustrating and annoying. If he understands why he will behave better, I feel. Good luck and know that I applaud you. Being a single mom is hard and you seem to be working hard at making your childs life wonderful for him.

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J.J.

answers from Spokane on

Hello S.,
Well I have a seven year old who is ADHD and Bipoler he was dignosed with it two years ago I have not done med.'s myself with him. I actually put him in concialing and that at this point has worked for him we go once a month and he has his time the conciler teaches him how to deal with it and how to control himself how to separt himself and cool off when he feels an apasode coming on. I think that this aproce may help you with your son. I don't belive that med's are the wrong way to go some children need them I have been lucky thus far and not had to do that with my son but who is to say what will happen in the futer.
As far as resours classes go some times when they are in those classes it seems that they are taken a step back and not learning anything but three of my four kids are in them and they have all inproved in there work and study habets as a resolt. My oldest was in them a couple of years ago for reading and math she hated doing both now I have to fight with her to put the book down to do her chorse. And math all though still not her fav sobject she is doing well and dose not mind doing it or even helping her brothers out with it. Two years ago she was at the bottom of her class and thanks to those classes she is now at the top of her class and learning and wanting to learn I can only hope that it dose the same for my three boys and for yours as well.
Just be pationt and work with your son and it will all work out in the end I remeber the frustration and confution that I felt with my son. But with time it will get better I thank god for giving me the challenges that he has given me it has made me a stronger person and I know he would not give me more then I can handle. Let me know if you have any other quetions or just want to get together and chat about it some more. I am always happy to help out with these things. God Bless, J.

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S.B.

answers from Portland on

Hi S.,

You are not a horrible person because you gave you son medication! When my son was 1 1/2 yrs old I knew something was a little bit different about him. He did/does what all kids do, but he would always do it to the extreme. By the time he was 3 years old, he was on his way to be kicked out of preschool. After educating myself on ADHD, I realized I was ADHD and so was my younger brother! There was an answer. At 3 1/2 I took my son to his pediatrician with 3 weeks of behavior issues (documentation) at preschool and at home. He said my son was classic ADHD. The first time I gave him his medication, I excused myself, went to my room and cried for 30 minutes or so. No one reacts the same to medications. Maybe he doesn't have the right one or the dosage needs to be looked at. ADHD children are wonderful. They are smart as a whip. They are just wired different and there is nothing wrong with that. My son is now 13 and he's proud to be ADHD. Did you know Einstein was? Winston Churchhill was. Most people who have there own business or patent things are. They think outside the box. They are creative. My son could get around a computer at 5 and was teaching me. Be proud he's different. Tell him. You only want the best for your child and for him to succeed. He will with your support and support of your family and friends. You are not alone. Take care

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E.B.

answers from Portland on

I am a mother *with* ADD, and statistically, my daughter has it too (she's only 4mo, so we don't know yet). I will give you my opinion on what I will do based on research.

Medication isn't the *only* way. It is part of a trifecta of solutions. Behavioral therapy and a change in lifestlye as well as medicine is the best way.

The school problem has to do with the childs ability to organize and pay attention. Color coding classes and sitting down with them during homework time as well as a regular schedule everyday are all ways of changing his lifestyle.

Make sure *you* as well as your son are seeing a therapist who can help with the emotional difficulty of having ADD/raising a child with ADD.

hth,
E.

PS ADD is a *mental* disorder. Don't see a pediatrician, they are only trained in *physical* disorders and thus tend to just "give it medicine".

PSS There are no clinical studies to show food has a relation to ADD. However, having a healthy diet helps all children.

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R.L.

answers from Eugene on

My husband (39) had ADHD as a child (back before it was so commonly diagnosed) and still as ADD as an adult (he said the hyperactive part went away when he hit puberty). He was on meds for a few yrs around 5-6 yrs old. He hasn't had them since, has learned to cope as an adult but did have issues at school when he was younger. We just had a baby so I read up a LOT and found Thom Hartmans books on ADD very uplifting and informative! He doesn't look it as a disorder, just a difference in personality and coping techniques. He has 10 or so books on the subject that may help you figure out what is really right for your son. Good luck!

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N.M.

answers from Casper on

S., have you ever thought that the medication IS working and what you are seeing in your son as far as school performance (sometimes behavior?) might just actually be your son, the medication might be helping him with the ability to get the signal there but he might not have a working signal. ok here's another way...the meds are to help him focus but if he has a learning problem the meds won't help much. They are to help him learn -not to make him smart. I think you are seeing HIM, with a learning disability and medication won't help. Parents often complain when their kids are on ADHD therapy that she "still won't do her homework" "won't eat his veggies"... it may be that the kid simply doesn't like homework, or green beans. That is a parenting concern that no amount of medicine is going to fix. The medicine is to help, not cure a very limited amount of problems. Talk to your Dr. about taking him off them and give him extra help with school, hire a tutor. Don't give up! Good Luck

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C.M.

answers from Grand Junction on

Have you tried to limit the amount of sugar he consumes? I know that this has helped other kids with ADD.

You can get books on how to treat ADD through diet. I also read an article on how a parent taught their daughter to ignore distractions at school and she taught herself to concentrate at the task at hand.

If the medication is not seeming to help....I would look into other alternatives.

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C.P.

answers from Eugene on

I had the same problem with my son and did alot of research. Try taking everything with red food dye in his diet out. The red food dye alone will cause alot of the problems. My son is not on meds and just watching his diet and keeping the red food dyes out makes a world of difference. The dyes are in things you wouldn't think of (like hot dogs and beef) so be careful on what you give him. Hope this helps

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D.W.

answers from Spokane on

Hi S. my name is D. and I have a 3yr old who is on meds please don't feel bad about it if it calms him down enough to concentrate and learn then its worth it. Also take a look at how he learns best; is it by hands on ; or visual ,or audio these types of learning are way different and if he isn't understanding his homework find out how he learns best and try to incorporate his studies in that manner. Also learning coping skills is very important special key words or signs that communicate his needs like "please stop" is a big one in our house because once wound up its hard to slow them down. we have found these key words to be extremely helpful. hope this helps. If you need to chat you can reach me at ____@____.com

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S.E.

answers from Seattle on

there are a lot of articles on this subject and changing diet and also using products that have little to no harsh chemicals can actually HELP...if you can believe that.

Here are some websites to go to

http://tsangenterprise.com/news90.htm

this also talks about a product called grape seed extract. If you want to learn more about how to find home cleaners that contain no harsh chemicals and also patented products that contain grape seed extract to help with alleviating effects and symptoms of ADHD you can contact me at ____@____.com and I can tell you more about it.

Good luck to you

S.

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T.S.

answers from Casper on

There are a lot of newer studies out about ADHD and food. I would suggest trying this for one month to see if it helps. Don't give your son these things: food coloring, processed foods, white sugar, white bread. There is a great book out called, "Maximum Solutions to ADD and ADHD" by Ted Broer. I highly recomend this, as my son was diagnosed at 2 with ADHD. We have followed the recomendations and have seen a DRASTIC change over the last 2 years. I cannot tell you how much this has helped our family and my son who is now in school. If you have any questions please email me. I am happy to share!!!

:)T.

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D.T.

answers from Boise on

My son who is 14 has not technically been diagnosed with ADHD but does suffer some from depression. I tried medication for that and he was only on it for about a month before I stopped it. He does have some of the classic symptoms of ADHD but I think that medicating any child at a young age is more detrimental to their overall development and prefer to use other methods. AS far as his education and helping him keep up with that you might want to consider getting some private one on one tutoring for him. Or give him the extra attention yourself if time allows. My thoughts are that the medication will sedate him to the point that he has no interest in anything,including learning. I might be wrong but this is just my nonexpert opinion. My son acted like he was sleepwalking all day when he was on his medication...and I can't remember exactly what it was but I didn't like it. I would suggest trying the medication for a bit longer and see if you think it helps..you can always take him off or trying a different one. You'll have to use your own judgment on what you think will be best for your child.

D.

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