Acting Out - Bradenton,FL

I know its hard being a single mom, But sometimes kids just need a little extra time. sometimes its just their way of letting us know they are not happy.im a single mom myself, and Im dealing with my 2 y/o terrible 2's. Just have lots of patience. Maybe he just wants ur attention and doesnt know any other way to do it.Try ignoring the situation. Dont raise ur voice, and save the tap on hands for when he is doing something dangerous only. Also, try and get sometime for yourself. this will help u relax and have more positive energy to deal with the tamtrums. Good Luck

C.,
I'm a mother of a 2-year-old as well, and my husband and I split up last year, so I'm on my own with my son more often than not. He goes to preschool 2 days a week, but I'm a work-at-home mom and I'm home with him for the rest of the time.

I kept my son's pack & play and I use that for time outs. My son is generally pretty good, but here lately he has been having more tantrums - which are more frequent on the days he sees his father. When he goes into tantrum mode, I try to talk to him but I generally can't get him to listen to me. So I ask him if he needs a time out. If he still doesn't calm down, I put him in the pack & play for 2 minutes. After the 2 minutes, I go back and ask him if he's ready to come out and 99% of the time, his attitude is great after the time out. I haven't been successful with a time out chair or corner, but the pack & play really does the job for us. I've been using that method for several months now. I normally give him a warning before placing him in time out. The only time he does not get a warning before time out is when he hits someone (including me) or when he throws a toy while he's in the house (because that could potentially hurt someone).

I've also heard that children tend to be better behaved at preschool or with a babysitter than with their parents, and because of that, they strive and struggle to behave for the hours that their mother is not there. Then they breakdown when their mother is there and the kid just kind of lets loose. They know that their mother loves them unconditionally and will still love them when they are misbehaving and letting off steam and they are more secure with showing the negative behavior to their mother than other caregivers. I think that's what I run into with my son after he has spent time with his father.

I hope that helps,
C.

A strong positive male figure (could be a uncle, grandparent, good friend of the family) may help control some behaviors. I know that with my daughter, she listens better to her dad at times because he seems to have that firm, steady tone & he is good at calming her down. I have worked with kids of all backgrounds for many years as a teacher and in single parent homes the kids miss parts of the relationship from the other "parent." Even at a young age, I saw a lot of benefits to the child and parent when they spent some time with someone they could look up to. It gives the child the stability of having someone else who loves & understands them in a different way...and gives mom/dad a chance to have a break and recharge as well. I am not sure if this helps, or if you are already implementing this...just thought I would share a bit of what I have observed. My daughter is turning 2 as well, and the tantrums come, and they want to be so independent and get "their way" I understand...hang in there though...it gets easier :)

Hi C., how are you? I have a four yr old, who has been acting out a lot too ... my husband and I are going through a divorce, have been seperated for about 18 months and it seems that in the last 6 months it has really hit her. The change is big, she no longer has both of us under one same roof, also in the past year we sold our home and each live in different houses ... which I think also has affected her.

I would say look at any changes he's undergone that may be causing this change in him. I don't necessarily think it is that he can do anything at daycare, but there may be something happening (if not at home, at school). Does he have a new teacher, new kids, etc.

Have you considered family counseling, if for nothing else, to give you peace of mind?