A Little MODESTY?

Updated on July 19, 2011
L.A. asks from Kew Gardens, NY
20 answers

We live in a typical NY apt, post war with no cross ventilation, and no thermostat. So basically, indoors, it runs hot and muggy in the summertime, and hot and dry in the winter time.

If we don't have company, hubs and I both prefer being topless in boxers. I mean we'll come home, strip off our work duds, and spend the night in shorts.

Do we have to start wearing clothes for little one's sake? If so, at what age?

FYI- We are not nudists. This isn't a matter of principle. We aren't cruncy granola sorts. We are just too ____@____.com hot, and don't mind some skin.

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K.W.

answers from Youngstown on

I would at least wear a simple sports bra or tank to keep my top covered in front of my kids as they get older.

5 moms found this helpful

J.H.

answers from San Antonio on

I'm with Amanda! We're in shorts in the house 99% of the year. For you, I would just say toss on a light tank top and let it go at that. (Only when the kids get uncomfortable with the nudity, or you do.)

And a tip for Amanda, in case she comes back and reads this: I started wearing tennis outfits everywhere! They're feminine, keep the heat away and because they were made for women to sweat in, it wicks away the sweat. I'm always in a little tennis skirt, with the matching top, a little jewelry and some makeup. Viola! Feminine and practical!

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

M..

answers from Detroit on

Hows about a sports bra or tank top? Arent you afraid your going to burn your nipples on dinner?

10 moms found this helpful

S.J.

answers from St. Louis on

When it gets cold?

No, seriously, I don't know your familial situation. Do you just have the one 9 mo old baby? If yes, you have plenty of years of nudity ahead of you!

If it is just your tatas showing, I would think those could hang out till at least 3 years of age. People nurse that long, and beyond.

Now, after age 3 or so, you may want to consider not lounging around in the nude. But I still run from bathroom to bedroom naked and I have a 7 and 6 year old.

9 moms found this helpful

M.P.

answers from Provo on

Meh, let them learn some anatomy. As long as the major parts are covered, you're good IMO. I usually wear a tank and shorts at my house and that's year round. Do what you feel is comfortable for you and your family.

4 moms found this helpful
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P.M.

answers from Portland on

How old is your child? More modesty will be a good idea when any one of you becomes uncomfortable with the current state of undress. For many children, they reach this point somewhere between 4 years and 7 or 8, but some families just remain comfortable with skin.

4 moms found this helpful
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K.E.

answers from Jacksonville on

Saw my parents naked my whole life....My daughter is 3 and she sees my husband and I naked from time to time and we do not make it something that is icky or "wrong/embarassing." I grew up with the communcation lines open about my body and my sexuality. It proved to help me GREATLY in my teen years and beyond with self-esteem, self-worth and being comfortable in my own skin.

3 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

I understand the heat issue...

I think at about 3 kids need to see their parents in some sort of clothes...my husband will change out of work clothes into a t-shirt and cotton PJ pants...and I'll just wear my "little black dress"...

But we have A/C...and VA can get just as nasty in the summer as NY!!! YIKES!!! Humidity sucks!!!

3 moms found this helpful

T.K.

answers from Dallas on

uh yeah, my sweetheart would never be able to sit through an episode of Sports Center if I walked around topless. How do you get anything done??? Isn't he just all over you?

But seriously, I think once the kids start to notice your parts its time to cover them. At my house, I put on as little as possible, but still technically covered.

3 moms found this helpful
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B.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have some shorts I bought at WalMart that I use as swim trunks. Nothing accidently hangs out.

A small sports bra should be sufficient when the time comes and men's swim trunks or women's shorts should do fine.

Just a thought . . . As far as the hot and humid goes, I bought a small 5000 btu window a/c from Home depot at their end of season sale for $50. It will keep a 400 sq ft room frosty. After the humidity is out of the air, you can turn the a/c off and be comfortable with the ceiling fan on. Being comfortable is worth the $50 plus $10 more a month in electricity.

Good luck to you and yours.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

It isn't going to hurt anything for your kids to see you naked.

2 moms found this helpful

C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I'd say when your kids are about 2 years old. If you don't want to wear a shirt, what about a sports bra?

1 mom found this helpful
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L.F.

answers from San Francisco on

No, if you are comfortable in your body and your enviroment requires less clothing, do whatever makes you comfortable! I would continue this until someone becomes uncomfortable about it--there isnt really an age per se, but a comfort level thing. GL

M

1 mom found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Kansas City on

thanks for this question, i wonder the same thing. my oldest is two and i'm starting to want a little more modesty around him, but he is such a curious little boy and points at me then looks at himself like he doesnt understand why mommy looks different. i think if your kiddo seems oblivious then it is okay but when he starts noticing then maybe a sports bra like the other momma suggested.

1 mom found this helpful

A.C.

answers from Provo on

I really think there is no correct answer on this one. There are many families who walk around nude or in undies and there are others who do not. My parents were the type that walked around nude or in underwear; still are. They have always been very matter of fact about the body and about sex as well. In some ways, this was a good thing, as we as children had a clear understanding about how the body and it was not this big mystery; we could easily ask our parents questions about sex without it being a big uncomfortable deal. In other ways, I think my parents maybe stretched the boundaries a bit far... my brother's fiance was over a few months ago and my mom was walking around in undies, no big deal! I would imagine that made the fiance a bit uncomfortable.
Anyway, my perspective is that it is fine as long as the neighbors cannot see you and as long as it is not making your kids and others uncomfortable.

1 mom found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

When I grew up my mom was so freaking prudish it scared me. She was mortified if I saw a boob.

SO, when I grew up, I was different. I have no issues with my body, I love myself and when I had my daughter 16 yrs ago, there was no way I was going to be like my mom.

We have very open lines of communication, not ashamed of our bodies and there is nothing gross or dirty about it. My daughter has great self esteem and is comfortable in her own skin just like I am.

My daughter is like me, go to the locker room or dressing room, I could care less if there is a door there. We are in no way nudists but we just don't let a naked body warp our mind...

My opinion is that you are just fine.

I always thought something was wrong with my mom for her to be that uptight...... she still is to this day.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I would say yes, but you should be ok until the kids are 4 or 5, and than it depends on what sex. You could still run around in boxers and a sports bra even as a son is older because you are still fully covered, and I would think dad would be ok in boxers even with a slightly older girl as long as all the important bits are covered :)

1 mom found this helpful
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R.S.

answers from San Antonio on

We live in Texas it is hot hot hot...in the evenings I live in light shorts and a "wife beater" t-shirt. Sometimes t-shirt and undies, no shorts.

It is up to you and what you are comfortable with...I am fine as long as we have on undies...I personally like to wear a top as we have windows with no blinds and don't want to give the neighbors a free show.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Why?

I mean, I could never go around topless (I'd get a black eye, and all those nerve endings *hurt* if the girls aren't in a bra)... but even as unattractive as my belly is these days, I'll wear a bra and pants/ shorts/ skirt/ sarong/ whatever around my own house. In FL, (granted, with a prettier tummy) I wore a bikini top in public.

If I could go topless (at home, on the beach, whatever) I would. Why not?

M.L.

answers from Houston on

Oh yes, at least a tank top. Once the child starts to show signs of modesty or pointing out and asking about body parts, then it's time to cover up. I would usually say around 2-4, depending on the child.

To me, it's great to teach your child about self confidence, but it's also important to teach them about modesty and keeping privates, well.. private, for safety's sake.

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