8Month Old, Back up on EBM Feeding, but Now Refusing Boob!!!!!

Updated on August 29, 2007
A.K. asks from Chicago, IL
9 answers

My DS is at daycare FT, and over the last 2 weeks he went from having 20oz EBM during the day (8-5), to 6oz. He has cereal and Gerber for lunch(mixed with EBM). Now after 2 weeks of this, he is gradually building back up on his intake during the day. Since early Saturday morning's feeding he is refusing to nurse!! Although definately hungry, he pulls away from me and turns the other way. But when I offer the bottle (after he refuses me) he takes it and drinks 4-5 oz!!!! I'm happy that at least he is still taking milk, and now sleeping through the night, but why is he now refusing the boob? I'm trying hard not to get sad :(

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So What Happened?

So, some good news! My son did nurse again for his early morning feed both yesterday and this morning, plus a second nursing session before he went to daycare this morning. So, who knows if this will continue or if it was just because I managed to catch him while he was still sleepy, or because I changed his position slightly - I'm just SO happy for right this second that he nursed! I'll take it!!! :) A big thank you to all of you for your suggestions and support! I was having a little pity party for myself the last few days!

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L.A.

answers from Chicago on

Ironically, my son gave it up at 8 mos. also. I don't know if it was the taste, but I suspect he couldn't eat fast enough to suit him. Be glad that you had as long as you did! They grow up quickly, don't they?

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K.

answers from Chicago on

Bottles take less work to eat from and people are generally lazy. Your son has learned that if he fusses you'll give him the easy meal. Like the other poster, I suggest that you personally don't feed him ANY bottles. He will eat when he is hungry - don't worry.

A couple of other things you can try:
- pump until you let down and then offer him the boob. This makes it less work for him to get the milk.
- offer him the boob at *every* meal. If he won't take it then have someone else bottle feed him (not you). Or just feed him some solids.

Nursing strikes happen, and they seem like they last forever. But he'll probably go back. Try and catch him when he's sleepy. Don't give up. It may take a week or so, but if you're really consistant about offering him the boob every time then he will eat. You might also consider dedicating a day or two (on a weekend) to re-establishing nursing. Spend the whole day with him and don't offer him any bottle if he misses a meal, but let him nurse on demand all day and offer it frequently.

Babies very rarely will self-wean before about 18 months of age. I know what you mean, though, about being sad. My son went on a brief nursing strike around that age and I was crushed. He got over it, and he still nurses at 15 months of age. :)

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S.R.

answers from Chicago on

I agree about the poster who said to catch him while he's sleepy. Try to get to him the minute you hear him wake up from a nap... good luck.

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A.R.

answers from Chicago on

I doubt he is self-weaning since you state he is still taking formula... which makes me think he is an infant rather than a toddler. Children don't typically self-wean until at least 3 yrs old.

It sounds like a nursing strike. Try nursing him when he is sleepy and during the night. Some babies reverse their schedules when they are taking bottles and breast- they will take the bottle while at daycare during the day and not eat very much and then nurse "all night" because they like it "straight from the tap."

I would not offer him ANY bottles from you while you are available to nurse him. Don't worry, he won't starve! Sometimes nursing strikes can last a few days that feel ENDLESS. My 3 month old did this and I was so worried I was doing something wrong, but it was just a phase.

Have you joined La Leche League? You might try calling a local LLL Leader- they can be amazing help and it's free!

Another thing it could be is nipple confusion- he might be upset because your letdown flow is not as fast as the bottle. I *personally* would try changing to a lower-flow bottle OR massaging your breasts until you feel your milk start to flow and then attach him to the breast and see if that helps.

If you have any questions, feel free to send me a message. Don't give up! It takes patience, but he should come around!!

-Amanda
aspiring IBCLC

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H.

answers from Chicago on

Of course, it is up to you to decide how you feel about continuing. I've heard recommendations up to 2 years, when the little ones' immunity really kicks in. I think my sister's 2nd child did this, she preferred the faster bottle around 9 months. My sister pumped up to a year.

My children never did this, however I was about ready to be done nursing at 1 year, but once my children nursed for a full year, they were no way ready to give up. I tried and tried to wean gradually up to 18 months, and then finally went cold turkey. So, to look on the bright side, if it is too much stress and trouble for you to continue and he really is self-weaning-- you won't have to fight the battle later when you are ready and he is set in his ways!

Oh, what I would have done to have a child that slept through the night before a year, or in my daughter's case 18 months!

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A.P.

answers from Chicago on

I had the same situation. My son was in daycare from 6-10 months old. At 8 months he suddenly weaned himself one night. It was sad, but he has always been little mr. independent...so I went along with it. If you are not ready to give up nursing, then still pump and try and get him while he is hungry to nurse or sleepy. Best of Luck!

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J.H.

answers from Chicago on

The only explaination I can come up with of why your child is refusing to nurse is that maybe he just is not used to it anymore. If he is in daycare full time then a bottle it what he gets most of the time and now he is used to it. Especially if you put him in daycare from a very young age, he most likely has just accepted the feel of a bottle even if it is breast milk that you pumped, and is not used to you anymore. Kids tend to gravitate to what they are used to.

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G.M.

answers from Chicago on

My best friend had to express milk when she went back to work, but she made sure that she was never the one to give her baby a bottle. No nipple confusion or anything else! Hope that helps! He is now 14 mos., and no problems!

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A.P.

answers from Chicago on

My son did the same thing to me at 7 months. The only reason I could think of was that he was using a bottle for some of his feedings also, and preferred that. So basically I just pumped and gave him bottles until eventually I stopped producing enough milk, then I just quit all together and finished out the last couple months before his first birthday using formula. Hopefully some other moms can give you more help! good luck!

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