8 Yo Picking Habit Causing Huge Scabs

I used to pick a lot too. Had huge scabs on my forehead all the time. FOr me, it didn't mean anything. I would still pick at my face all the time if I was a hermit in the woods. I am a happy and balanced person and don't think its a problem. It did used to drive my teachers nuts tho because of the blood dripping down my face on the way to get a kleenex. I think its just a gross habit. Nothing more.

My daughter is very oral. (chews nails, fingers, Hair, ect..) I know that this is different but I finally used gum to distract her and it has worked. My suggestion is to try a squishy ball or silly putty to keep her hands busy. she could use a squishy ball at night and play doe or silly putty during the day or in the car.

good luck

Hi A.. Picking - especially at hair, and pulling it out, even at the cost of the pain that it inflicts - sure sounds like my niece, who has an anxiety disorder, and OCD. In many, many ways, she presents as a perfectly normal, very bright accomplished child - and she is- she just also has this disorder. Actually, taking her to a therapist may be a good idea. A therapist can rule such a disorder out, and should (if he/she is any good), have some ideas for you and her mother about how to help her cope, either in addition to, or instead of taking medication. I know that the ideas that my niece's therapist gave made a world of difference for her and she doesn't have to use medication, at least at this point. The important thing in that situation was that the therapist understood the disorder well enough to come up with the right ideas, instead of the wrong ones that a log of people were also happy to offer (that would have been counterproductive)! A lot of people don't understand OCD or anxiety disorders, and associate it with behaviors, rather than thoughts - i.e. excessive hand washing, etc. It helped our family to educate ourselves a bit about it, so that we could be more supportive to her, and understand what drove the behaviors.

I think it's great that you are willing to be creative about how to help your daughter, and not be freaking out about it. That kind of confidence will probably be very reassuring to her. This is probably one area where getting as close as possible to the same page with her mom would probably also be reassuring to her...a good therapist might be the neutral "idea generator" that you both need. Good luck, and I understand, by the way, how frustrating this can be. My heart goes out to you both.

I used to do this a lot - mostly on my head and mostly at night when I was trying to go to sleep. It was a bit obsessive. I don't think I ever had anything dime-sized. I will tell you that this behavior was definitely related to anxiety. Does she also have trouble sleeping? These went together for me. I would talk with her, see how she's doing, if there's anything that she's thinking about or worried about. For me, I would go over and over things in my head and worry about the next day a lot. I think it's best to find the source rather than attempting to address the symptom, that never worked for me. If you remain concerned, you could certainly bring her to a child counselor/psychologist as she may not know how or want to share some of her concerns with you. It may be something that can be solved through talking things out, writing in a journal, or relaxation techniques, or she may have a chemical issue that needs to be addressed. I would try the behavioral changes first, but if there is a chemical issue, that is real too and no one should be ashamed of addressing it.

Good luck!

Teacher her a craft like crochet which is something a 8 year old can do. It will keep her fingers busy when she is awake. She can make lots of things and focus her kinestetic energy what she makes.

She may be stressed and such and therapy will help but why not deal with her need to pick by keeping her fingers busy during the day.

This sounds like what I have, and I've had it for quite some time, but have just recently found out what it is; it's called Dermatillomania (look it up, research it, you'll find it)- Obsessive compulsive self injurious skin picking. It is almost like cutting, but a slightly different form of release. I pick at myself to the point of injury, especially at my face, back, head and fingers (cuticles). I now have acrylic nails on to keep from causing AS MUCH injury (I know she is too young for this), but now I will sometimes use "things" to pick with, like cuticle scissors, or nail clippers, etc. So, yes, this is something that she needs help with. Unfortunately, I can't really give you any recommendations as to what works, but I think taking her to her pediatrician and/or a specialized children's therapist is a good idea. Don't blow it off, otherwise she could be like me, an adult going through the problem. I do know also that it is associated with anxiety/stress and is a part of OCD. That doesn't mean she HAS OCD, but it is a counterpart, something that is related to OCD.

This behavior doesn't necessarily mean that she is having "issues" right NOW, especially if this is a behavior that has been going on for a long time. It could just be her, part of who she is. But, if it's a newer behavior, then it could certainly suggest that there are things that need to be figured out, discussed and dealt with. How is your relationship with her? By your reference that she is a "bonus" child, to me, that suggests that it's not so great, and you don't consider her yours, or part of your family....? Just my perception.

Good luck, I hope you guys are able to help her.

That does sound like an underlying issue. Since she is a bonus child, that is one issue that may be causing anxiety. If there is constant picking, nail biting, hair twisting, leg bouncing, these are all signs of some kind of stress. I couldn't sit still while watching TV when my dad was in the same room. Please help her to see if she is in need of a talk. You may be able to gain her trust enough to help her figure this out. Picking that much is a danger to infection.

This is not too likely an "either-or" situation. As a person with a lifelong tendency to have trouble sleeping, think/worry too much, and pick/touch obsessively, I would say this little girl could be exhibiting BOTH anxiety and a strongly kinesthetic, perhaps highly sensitive, nature. There could also be a chemical imbalance in the brain, which can lead to a variety of physical and emotional symptoms. And don't rule out sensitive, itchy, irritable skin.

As other moms have suggested, a visit to a pediatrician is a good idea. Helping out with a balanced diet and avoiding common food colorings and preservatives may make a difference (a recent large study in England showed these ARE a problem for sensitive kids). Plenty of exercise, and occasions for laughter could help a lot.

Invite her to share whatever might be bothering her, but be patient. She might be unwilling or unable to talk about underlying issues. They may either be too nebulous or, in her mind, too risky to discuss.

I still need to divert my impulses by fiddling with objects like a squishy-ball, beads, or a "worry-stone" in my pocket. I also choose very soft fabrics for clothing, which irritate my skin less and give pleasant surfaces to rub. My fingernails also appreciate something to gouge, like the edges of magazine pages (you should see a magazine after I get done with it - all scalloped). What if you were to take her to a bead store and help her find something that her fingers just love? Coupled with some relaxation techniques (I'll bet there are some fine videos available), you could be offering her some new tools and support that I wish adults in my life had offered me as a child.

Good luck. Your bonus daughter is lucky to have concerned and aware adults caring about her.

I personally think the mother should talk to her child's pediatrician. The two responses I read suggested anxiety, but you might be right too. There are other things that can cause a child to "pick". Either way the child needs to be seen to put a stop to it and find the root of the problem. Her ped. can lead her in the right direction. If it is anxiety then he can refer her to child pschychologist.
If she is having trouble sleeping, suggest giving her Melatonin (Your body makes this to help you relax to sleep). My childs neurologist put my daughter on this to help her sleep at night(she is also 8), and it works great. You can find this anywhere they sell supplements and vitamins. I know Kmart, Safeway, and Costco sell it.

I used to pick as well and if she is picking to that extent, it is definitely stress or anxiety related. Continuous picking to the point of causing wounds and bleeding is considered self-mutilation. Talk with her to see if there is anything going on in her life that she is overly-stressed about. And sounds like her mother's instinct about her was right-on. I definitely agree she may need to talk to a counselor or such. God bless!

I used to teach middle school and had a young teenage student with the same habit. She suffered from anxiety disorder and counseling/therapy helped her greatly. Once a person is picking to the point of hurting themselves I would think that it's gone beyond the point of biting nails, etc. I'm not a medical expert, just sharing my experience with a similar situation...

While shes in bed id suggest having her wear gloves while she sleeps, watches tv or has idle time.
Also maybe offering her more busy things to keep her hands occupied, like making bead jewerly, oragami or lacing toys.
Is she aware that she does it? If she is put a rubber band on her wrist and when she gets the urge to pick have her snap the rubber band. Thats what helped my coucin quit picking. Also cut her nails down all the way.
Good Luck!

I agree with her mother and others. Definitely sounds like anxiety, and she definitely needs help, the sooner the better. I'd find a good family therapist. 8 is a hard age, especially when living in two families and being a middle child with an older sister and a new baby. Wishing you well.