5 Yr. Old Daughter Daydreams in Class

Updated on April 27, 2010
N.S. asks from Princeton, LA
14 answers

My daughter's preschool teacher says she day dreams and looks around and doesn't do her work unless she gets on to her to do it. She takes her time on her work and is usually the last one that finishes. I don't if it's b/c she doesn't want to do it or what. Can someone help me? It's like she's in another world, from what her teacher says. She went to the evaluation center and they said she's fine. Hopefully it won't have any effect when she starts kindergarten this coming year.

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A.W.

answers from Savannah on

Hey N. -

I was diagnosed with ADD at that age for the exact type of behavior. Maybe have her evaluated? But try not to squelch the daydreaming all the way... I'm a successful writer now because I was given the opportunity to be in "my own world" and hone my creative thinking. It might look like she's not doing anything... but in reality her mind is very busy. Give her space to do this if its not hindering anything. As for school.... she's gotta to work and pay attention to pass, I'd suggest an evaluation and that might help.

Best of luck!!

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R.J.

answers from San Diego on

What springs to mind:

ADHD-i (inattentive type... typified by "daydreaming" aka her mind is so hyperactive she's in her own world much of the time)
gifted
vision problems
hearing problems
less than teacher/boring curriculum

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M.L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

It could just be the way she is. One of my girls had a similar issue, especially during K and 1st grades. She simply took her time, or would wait until someone noticed that she didn't have a pencil instead of asking for one (she didn't want to bother anyone).
As a 4th grader now, she still will move at her own pace, but has realized that she will miss out if she does not complete her assignments when told.
She would take her time to do a lot of tasks, not just school related ones. We joked that it was Sami speed and she would get to where she needed to be when it was time for her to get there. While frustrating for me, especially in the mornings when rushing to school, I have found that it is easier to accept it and embrace it as part of her personality.

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L.O.

answers from Chicago on

I was like that, but I was exceedingly bored. I had the textbooks all figured out the first week of school and so slacked off in school after that. My mother got me extra workbooks to challenge me at home, but the school work was boring, so she compromised with me so I could have my challenges, and please the teachers.
I have a relative that has an absence spell disorder treated with medication(not common, but easily treatable), but it sounds more like boredom from your description of it. Talk with your daughter in a positive intelligent manner and let her know your concerns, and perhaps she will let you know so you both can work through this.

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M.H.

answers from Birmingham on

My daughter had the same problem in the 1st grade. She made A's on everything but would bring home papers with huge red notes on them about how long it took her to do things -she would have to miss recess, pe, etc to finish. Took her to be tested for ADD, which she didn't have. The next year we had a much better teacher who was able to help her stay focused plus she grew out of it some. She's 14 now, extremely smart, but takes an hour to get dressed in the morning because she gets distracted!

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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

N.,

Is the teacher reporting that she is having trouble learning because of it? If not, then it could just be boredom.

If she is having trouble keeping up and her grades are suffering, then she has failed to follow through on her obligation to request an evalation to find a way to help her.

Teachers must try to find a classroom intervention, and if that does not produce results such that she is learning a years worth of material in a year, then she was obligated to refer your daughter for evaluation. It does not take much to put two and two together on what they should look for, and if there is any adverse effect on her education, the school has an afirmative obligation to seek evaluation under the child find clause of IDEA.

If you think that this is a problem for her, request that the school evaluate and seek a privte evaluation from a board certified child psychiatrist and a neuro psychologist.

If there is no issue with anything other than behavior the teacher does not like, then let the teacher come up with some classroom interventions!

M.

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A.H.

answers from New York on

maybe the teacher is boring.. not keeping her attention. When she watches a tv show that she likes.. does she really watch it.. not put on something she may not like ... like the news... tell her to watch it.. see if she is day dreaming... it may be the teacher isn't keeping her attention... next year ask for an interesting teacher.. tell the principal what your child is like.. and she needs someone to be fascinating... good luck

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K.G.

answers from Sarasota on

When I was in 6th grade...a LONG time ago...I would fall asleep in math class! My teacher called several parent/teacher conferences about this and it turns out I was bored to sleep. I could have told the adults this from the beginning but was afraid of getting in trouble! When my father finally sat down and talked to me about it and told me he would not judge me one way or another, I did tell him (I think that was the only time he listened to me without judging!). It was a relief for all of us to finally have the problem out on the table.

My parents finally talked the teacher into letting me move forward beyond what the class was doing and I ended up doing over two years of math in one year.

So, talk to her and see if you can get her to open up to you. If it is boredom, then you need to figure out how to get her more stimulated; if it is not and she does have a problem that is preventing her from learning (eyes, ears OR brain), then you can deal with that without her having to feel like she is going to get in trouble for admitting a problem.

The MOST important thing is to be your child's advocate and NOT make your child feel she is doing something wrong when it could be something completely out of her control...including boredom!

Hope this helps.

K.

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K.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Sounds just like me in school. I would get into trouble all the time for daydreaming. It was really bad when I was in second grade. I had a horrible second grade teacher. What's her teacher like?

I also think part of my daydreaming was due to my parents horrible marriage and fighting in front of us kids all the time. What's her home life like?

Also, my husband would day dream all the time too, but he daydreamed because school was boring to him, he was in the gifted classes.

There are many differnt reasons children daydream and I just recently heard a study regarding children and daydreaming. Supposedly children who day dream alot grow up to be really smart adults! I say, let her day dream, as long as her grades are still good. It's good for the imagination!!

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A.J.

answers from Baton Rouge on

I wonder if it a problem with the teacher. All she has to do is tell her class if we are doing a project and I call your name I want you to immediately return to work on the project. This way all she has to do is call the childs name and the child knows she has to return to work. Do you help her with home work, if so, how is she at home? I can tell you years ago there was a radio program where the mother of several asian boys was being interviewed because her somes were getting scholarships to ivy league schools. The mother had no education, did not speak english, and all she said was that when they returned home from school they received a snack and 30 to 45 minutes to relacks. Then sat at the kitchen table with her to do their homework. Each time one looked away from there books/work her job was to put their mind back on the home work. Good Luck God Bless

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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I have to agree with many of the other posters, your daughter is likely bored. If she does understand the work and get's it done correctly, then yep.. she is bored. Last year when my daughter was in kindergarten, I was always getting called for her falling asleep or talking too much. Turns out it was the teacher. My child was bored to sleep or to just find her own stimulating conversation. It was not until this year in first grade, when my daughter has a fabulous teacher that I realize just how much her kindergarten teacher was lacking. I am not saying it is all the teachers fault, I would just say that perhaps your daughter is not being challenged by the activities the teachers have prepared.

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L.N.

answers from New York on

she seems bored to death.

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

It could be a lot of things. If she's gifted, she could be bored if the work is too easy for her. Or she might have a focusing/concentration issue. Is she easily distracted? Has she had her eyes/ears checked? My son was having a hard time seeing the board across the class room until he got glasses. A hearing problem might mean she's not sure what the teacher wants her to do until the teacher specifically tells her.

W.Q.

answers from Tulsa on

Hi N.,

You don't say her age or how long this has been going on. It might simply be a phase she is going through. I can remember daydreaming during school...not very often, but some of them are still clear today. (I'm 57)

If this is an extreme problem though I'd suggest having her checked out by a psychologist. A psychologist can tell you, after a few simple tests, if your daughter is simply a dreamer or if there is a problem. It wouldn't hurt to remove all doubt or concerns of something else being the problem.

My son is a dreamer. It wasn't until he was a tween that we discovered that he has Asperger's Syndrome Disorder, a form of Autisim...early on he was diagnosed as having ADHD only. I am in no way suggesting that your dauhter has a mental illness. I'm simply suggesting that you rule out any possiilities.

I must add that I'm not quite sure if I would have taken another person's advice about seeking help with someone other than our family doctor. Hindsight being perfect, I should have taken him to a specialist long before I did. Our family doctor wasn't trained in recognizing the subtle signs of something other than a physical ailment.

I'm hoping that it's just a stage with your daughter, or maybe her work is too easy and she just is bored with doing it...thus the daydreaming. She may be gifted...something else that a psycholigist can determine.

Don't squelch her daydreaming...it makes for a very creative mind. Be her advocate and uncover the underlying reason. Needing glasses or a hearing aide, boredom, health (physical or mental), even where she sits in her class, could be the reason for her daydreaming or appearance of not participating. Simple tests can be done to determine your child's needs and it could be just a simple fix and all your worries will disappear. Well...you are a mom...at least your worries will diminish about this aspect of your daughter's life.

Good luck and God bless.

W. Q

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