5 Month Old Waking up Alllll Night Long. I'm Tired and Don't Know What to Do

Try reading "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. It did wonders for my little night waker and after a lot of work and a lot of time, we finally got her sleeping well! (then we went on vacation and it got a little messed up...but we will get back)

I wonder where the myth came from that solids help babies sleep longer. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends exclusive breastfeeding/formula until 6 months; before that their digestive system is too undeveloped. Maybe you can take her off solids until she is ready for them, especially if that is what is causing this difference.

That's got to be so difficult for you! What does your night time routine look like? Do you do the SAME THING every night? Do you give her a bath and then put her down? Does she have an early bedtime? Sometimes later bedtimes make kids tired, and when they're tired, they actually don't sleep as well. Kind of a backwards thing, but it's true. What do her naps look like during the day? Is she not sleeping well then either? Is she sleeping too much at naps?

Could she have a tummy ache or reflux which could be keeping her up at night?

Finally, could she be teething? My daughter started at 4 months, and it was a SLOW process - the teeth would hurt her and push against her gums, and then it was as if they retreated and went back upwards and then a few days or a week later, it would start again.

I know it's a lot of questions, but questions lead to answers. Maybe one of the questions will help you to check off what it IS and what it ISN'T. It's such a mystery to solve, and we wish our little ones would just sit up and tell us what's wrong. :) Since that won't happen at 5 months old, we have to kind of guess.

Hang in there - this site is great, and you'll get some valuable information from moms... rest well and good sleep to you all.

I'm going to suggest the same thing I've been telling everyone on here. For a while I used a fisher price rocking/recliner chair. My son would get bored in there and fall asleep. it took a while the first time but not too long Once your baby's asleep, that is hopefully half the battle. try it for naptime. a car seat would work just as well, and that might make her feel a little more swaddled. strap her in so there's no danger of choking. later when she's good at falling asleep you can transition her to a crib, but it doesn't have to be too soon. most babies 'know' they can fall asleep in the carseat, and that is relaxing to them. hopefully this helps you. if you are nursing she is going to get more nutrition from that than from baby food. baby food helps baby feel full, but isn't that absorbable at this point.

S.,

There are a lot of sleep training methods out there, and they all work for some children. You have to figure out what you are willing to do, and you really need to be aware of when a method is not working for your child. I have talked to parents that let their babies “cry it out” for WEEKS, assuming that it would eventually work. It didn’t, and everyone was miserable. You need to know where you are on the spectrum, and you need to be willing to respond to your child.

It does sound like your daughter needs to learn some new sleep associations. If she is in the habit of being swaddled or nursing to sleep, it will take some time to break that association. I would recommend weaning her off the swaddle. Try keeping her feet unwrapped, then her arms, then don't swaddle at all. If she is nursing to sleep, I would put some other activity in between nursing and bed. When my girls were about 6-8 months old, we started reading a book after they nursed, then they would rock, then go to bed. I tried to put them in bed sleepy, but not asleep. It also helped if Daddy did the reading or rocking (when he was home - my hubby also works long hours.)

The book that worked for my girls, and meshed with my parenting philosophy was Elizabeth Pantley's "The No Cry Sleep Solution." The beginning of the book is a total gem. She explains the science of sleep, and offers a chart which shows the average range of hours that babies should be sleeping based on their age. Now, every child is different, but this chart gave me a good basis to check in on how much my kids were sleeping. Once you have a realistic expectation of what sleep could look like with a 5 month old, you can figure out what you are able and willing to do. I think waking 2-3 times a night at this age is normal and acceptable. This is especially true if your baby is petite, or if you spend a lot of time running after your toddler during the day and your baby doesn’t get as many chances to nurse during the day. She may well be making those calories up at night. Here are some things to keep in mind:

1. When people say a baby should sleep through the night at 12 weeks, you have to understand the medical definition of sleeping through the night: 1 5-hour stretch throughout the night. That is it. Not the whole night through. I would put my kids to bed around 7pm, and unfortunately by the time I got to bed at 11pm, they were ready to wake up an hour later. If you can, try to go to sleep earlier so you can get some more rest. The housework will still be there in the morning, trust me! For a while, I went to bed at 8pm so I could get a solid few hours of sleep in. As they started sleeping more, I was able to have more normal adult sleep.

2. Babies will wake up through the night, and THIS IS NORMAL, especially for breastfed babies. Breastmilk is digested more quickly and more fully than formula, so breastfed babies get hungry more often. My breastfed girls started sleeping through the night occasionally around 8-9 months. By 10 months they were sleeping through the night as often as not. By a year, they both slept completely through the night most of the time.

5. Solid foods WILL NOT MAKE YOUR BABY SLEEP LONGER. Go check out the American Academy of Pediatrics website. They absolutely do not recommend any solid foods for babies under 6 months, and they recommend that breastfeeding continue until at least 1 year of age. This is an unfortunate myth that just won't die. Starting solids has been linked to increased allergies, asthma and eczema.

4. A bedtime routine is essential. If you are running late, shorten steps in the routine, but don't skip stuff. Children thrive on routine. I feel your pain with trying to stick to a routine with a toddler around. It will probably get easier as the weather gets colder. Again, remember that this stage will pass, and by a year old, you baby should be much more flexible and taking fewer naps during the day.

6. "Sleep breeds sleep." When people are overtired, our brains release chemicals that then make it harder for us to fall asleep. So many parents think that they will keep their baby up late or skip a nap to get them to sleep better in the night, but it actually backfires. Once baby is on a good sleep schedule and getting plenty of rest, they tend to sleep better and longer. Also, a few minutes of sleep in the car can totally sabotage a nap or bedtime. Be cautious about planning your outings, or park somewhere you can let baby sleep for a longer period of time.

7. Sleep when you can. I know the exhaustion with a baby and toddler - I've been there too. For a while I wound up totally babyproofing our bedroom. When the toddler got up, I brought her in and let her play while the baby was nursing. While they were doing that, I was dozing. It wasn't as good as sound sleep, but it was better than nothing.

8. Do what you can to get the sleep you need. If you need to have your baby in the same room, or in your bed, don't worry about "sleep habits." Do what gets the most people the most sleep. Do what you need to to get through this hard time. When you are well rested, you are more able to tackle a sleep training plan. You also might find that your kids just grow out of those habits and drop them when they are ready. Our girls were in our bed, then moved into a cosleepe in our room, then moved into a crib in their own room. We all got better sleep, and despite the hype, they moved out just fine when they were ready.

I would really recommend you read "The No Cry Sleep Solution." You can get it on amazon.com, or you may be able to check it out of the library. It was a lifesaver for us, and it really helped us understand the mechanics of sleep. Yes, children need to learn to soothe themselves back to sleep, but it can be done without leaving them to cry inconsolably.

Best of luck,
S.

At 5 months she should be able to sleep just fine wihtout being swaddled. Introduce something else that means "time to sleep". Sing a particular songs, rocks her, whatever sounds good to you. You may just have to let her cry even if it does wske your 2 year old up. Kids get into habits, and it usually only takes 2-3 times of crying it out to break the habit. Yes you will have a couple of days that are miserable, but the payoff will be so worth it.

Get a sound machine so that it blocks out some of the crying...I know exactly what you are going through and the sound machine has really helped up cause I have been able to let her cry it out a little bit more because it muffles the sound of the cry...I know there are a lot of moms on here that would want to eat me alive for saying that but you gotta get your sleep Trust me I know. But you gotta do what works for you. The sound machine was wonderful! (my other daughter has a little radio that plays really mellow music and that also helps!) Good luck hope you get some sleep

5 mos is still very young. She can be having growth spurts and teething starts soon if not now. All can disrupt sleeping. Neither of my kids slept through the night until almost 10 mos old. Waking every three or four hours to eat is not uncommon at 5 mos. Don't wean her from swaddling, if it provides comfort wait until she weans herself, which is usually when they kick it off and move around a lot. If she is now, just don't swaddle her anymore. Lay her down awake, give her white noise, a fan or music box to fall asleep to. Do not use a pacifier or anything else to get her to sleep as she will grow dependent on it. Put her down for naps and bedtime at the same time. Do a relaxing bath before bedtime with relaxing lotion. Keep her in a back positioner to help with keeping her on her back and feeling secure.
If you can nap when they do. Even if things around the house need done you have to be rested. It is short lived and if her gums are swollen try teething tablets or tylenol before bed, as it very well could be teething right now.
Hang in there, it will pass and they will start sleeping better.

hi. First off, I think she is napping too much. THREE naps for 1.5-2 hours each? I'd try to drop the last nap and put her down for the night earlier. At that age, my son would take two decent naps and then we'd put him to bed at 6-630. People thought I was crazy but he slept through the night EVERY night. Also, we took away the swaddle at about that age because he was always struggling out of it. We switched to a sleep sac so he still felt secure but his arms were free. I heard that some kids do terribly without the swaddle but I guess ours was just ready and yours might be too. We didn't do "cry it out" until about 7 months and never let him cry for more than 30 minutes. Find a new "trigger"--ours was a few minutes of slow dancing with him in my arms with white noise playing--got him totally drowsy and he went down like a log. Oh and feed her a lot during the day. I nursed on demand and he just didn't need any at night. Good luck!

I know some people are tired of reading so many books on parenting/advice, but I have a suggestion for you if you want to go that route. My 4 1/2 went through the same thing starting at 6 months and didn't stop until she was nearly 4!!! The difference for us was the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Weissbluth. It was life changing and now my 16mo old never has had a single sleep problem even thought she had severe eczema like my 4 year old. My 4 year old is now finally sleeping also and we owe it all to this book. It worked for us. It is a little preachy and heavy on the research in the beginning, but once you understand sleep and it's importance it makes it easy to teach your child to sleep. Actually if you learn to "catch the wave" of sleep, it really isn't hard at all and I know from experience that it will be rather painless. Good luck, I hope you find some peace and rest whatever will work for you!

R.

I am having the exact same problem. My daughter is 4 1/2 months and wakes up at least three if not more times in a night. She also gets out of her blanket. I don't know any great advice but I try and wrap her up right away before she wakes up all the way and then I rock her back to sleep. Unfortunately, that doesnt work for too long. I am considering trying to get rid of the swaddle blanket. Hope things get better for you

first of all, get someone to watch the kids today so that you can take a long nap. then you will be able to handle whatever is necessary to help your baby sleep and help your 2 yr old be patient with it as well (especially if it involves more crying).

S., I know exactly what you are talking about. My hubby is a cop too so I spend a lot of time being a single mom. I work full time and juggle daycare, work and my 20 month old. We had problems with our little guy sleeping through the night, I always blamed myself for holding him until he fell asleep as a baby. : ) He always slept great in our bed which my husband loved but I was the one dealing with moving him back to his crib in the AM so I could get ready myself. As you know, he wasnt there to deal with the issues of letting him sleep in bed it was just easier for him to get sleep at night. You may have to try and let her cry it out once. It was extremely difficult for me to do it but it only took once. Maybe you can sneak ear plugs in your 2 year old while they are sleeping or have a fan running in their room to drown out the noise. We found him a stuffed animal and blanket that we always put to bed with him and we played a CD with soft lullabye's in his room. That all seemed to work at least until he learned at an early age to crawl out of the crib. I really never thought that it would work so quickly but it did. Of course it then took me a few days to sleep without checking on him since he wasn't waking up.

I assume the pediatrician has gone over any possible medical / food problems interrupting sleep. Hopefully this will help you. I know how frustrating it can be. It all starts the minute your head hits the pillow.

What area do you live? I would love to get my little one in gymnastics some day. He loves to climb and tumble and has a lot of energy.

don't get up all the time - your little one will fall back asleep on their own, it's an important skill they need to learn. I have three, two of which had colic, so I sure know sleep deprivation....

Hi S.,

Does she arch her back and cry during feedings or when she wakes up? Does she sleep better during the morning or in the car seat vs. anywhere else? Does her breath smell sour?

She may have silent reflux (heartburn that does not result in spit up), both my kids had it as babies and slept terribly without many lifestyle changes and medication.

Just in case make sure you are not feeding her any foods that will cause heartburn: peaches, citrus, tomatoes, chocolate, caffienne, diary (can be a culprit as well) etc. If you are nursing you have to stop eating those foods as well.

Oh also get a white noise machine so that the baby can whine longer w/o waking the 2 year old.

Good luck!
R.

I have two children, both very good sleepers. We used the halo sleepsac, womb sound for white noise and sometimes a small fan (blowing away from the crib) for white noise, as well. Leapfrog has a stuffed frog, called Baby Tad, that plays soft lullabies by squeezing his pad. It's very soothing. For now, you could keep it out of the crib, but when your baby gets older, she can squeeze the pad and start the music herself for self soothing. All these indicate it's time to sleep and it works well for us! Good luck!

I would get the book 'How to Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems' by Ferber. This book has saved me (with all 3 kids) and about 4 other kids I know. I'm sure it's not for everyone, but my kids turned into the best sleepers ever when I tried the suggestions in the book. It's all very common sense and easy to implement. For us it only took about 3 to 5 days for our kids to start sleeping through the night at ages 5-7 months. Check it out - it's worth a try!

My 3 month old was doing the same thing and I was dying! I thought what have I done to my life....
Then one night we tried putting her in her own room. We put on a fairly loud fan (mostly because it was so hot in her room) but it ended up being the perfect "white noise". It just circulated the air and would drown out any outside noise from her ears.

As for the swaddling... I too was just over her getting an arm out and thought will she have to be swaddled forever? So we have been putting her in those one piece zip up onesies. It is the long sleeved ones with the feet. For now we are using just the thin ones that come in a package of 3 or 4 at Target since it is still summer, but it really seems to keep her warm enough and covered up enough.

The combo of being covered up and the fan has turned her world and mine around. The first week I got her to sleep threw the night at least 4 times and the other nights she only got up once. If I forget to turn on the fan or got lazy about the night outfit, sure enough it was another bad night. So we stick to the routine and as of two weeks ago, she goes down at 7 and doesn't get up until 7. I am still shocked she is doing this after all the night trouble she gave us!!!

Also make sure she is going to be early enough! I thought it was crazy to put her down at 7, but she would get so grumpy and I would try everything to make her happy. Finally I just put her down and that was the trick- she was just plain tired and wanted to sleep!

So combo of early to bed (stay on a routine) white noise and something warm and secure to wear has been the ticket for us! I know all babies are not the same, but try it out.

I am not sure what I will do this winter about the fan (I am worried about that) but maybe I'll just have to move to a loud heater :)

Good luck! I feel your pain!

Do your kids share a room? If not, here's a trick I learned. When my oldest son was young and didn't want to sleep, I'd just turn on a lamp in his room (pretty dim) and put a toy in his crib. Then I'd go to bed. I have no idea when he fell asleep again, but he did.
As far as your 2 year old waking up, you're right. That might happen. A few times. But it's amazing how he'll learn to sleep through it after a few times! My second son was a really light sleeper as a baby. But when he had to share a room with his big brother (two years older), he started sleeping through everything. The older one sometimes wakes up hysterical when he has to go potty. It wakes up everyone but the baby!
It sounds like she needs to learn how to put herself to sleep. Do you put her down while she's drowsy but not asleep? If not, try that. If she's dependent on the swaddle, try wrapping her in a blanket, looser and looser every time.
Do your kids both take naps at the same time? If so, take one, too! Make yourself ignore the laundry and the kitchen. You need some sleep!
Another thing that helped a lot was if I would take a nap with the baby in my bed. Then we woke up at the same time and I didn't want to scream when I was yanked from badly needed sleep by crying.
I hope you can get some rest soon!

My first daughter was just like your daughter. I can imagine how exhausted you feel, and my husband traveled considerably so I didn't get many breaks. I read the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." Though I didn't agree with everything, it helped me know what changes I could make, what cues to watch for in my daughter, and finally helped us all get the sleep we needed. I used it with my second child and things went much smoother. Hope this book is helpful.

I freaked out the first time my son had his blanket stuck to his face. So I banned the blanket. To help him sleep better, warm pajamas, and turned the temp up so that he wouldn't get chilled.

Hi, S.. My baby is five months old, too, and I still swaddle her at night because if I don't, she kicks and wakes herself up. But I've started leaving her arms out of the swaddling blanket now, and just wrapping up her feet. That keeps her from kicking and triggers her to sleep, but she can move her arms around and suck on her fingers if she wakes up in the night. It's really made a big difference. I use the blankets with Velcro tabs that you can get in the baby department at Target or Wal-Mart or wherever. My baby sleeps ten hours at a stretch, or sometimes just wakes up once, but I can go in and comfort her, put a pacifier in her mouth and play some music, and she'll doze off again. She fusses when I first put her down sometimes for a few minutes, but only swaddling her feet and legs seems to be doing the trick.

Good luck and good rest!
J. Elizabeth

I'm anxious to hear what others say but I think the problem is the swaddle. She is WAY too old to be swaddled. Three months max for the swaddle. Once they get past 3 months, they are ready to move on. I think you need to bite the bullet and get rid of it. Also, is your husband getting up with you at night? We have a 10-day-old and both of us are getting enough sleep. I feed the baby at about 9pm, my husband gets up for the next feeding (11:30 or so), I get up for the next one (2:30-3:00) and he gets up for the last one (5:30-6:00). We both get at least 5-6 hours of solid sleep plus another hour or two. If your husband works nights, could he switch to the day shift for a couple of weeks to help you get this implemented? I was talking to a baby sleep expert this morning and they get 3 month olds sleeping 11-12 hours per night. Also, buy the book by Mark Weisbuth (??) "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child."

It's normal for a 5 month old to wake up at night --- but not 3-9 times. You need to train her for a different trigger than the swaddle. She's too big to swaddle anymore. Set up a different night time routine. You need to let her cry (5-10-15-20-25-30 minute intervals). You won't fix it in one night. It will take days, maybe even weeks. You need to be patient. Also, put one of your dirty shirts in her crib. Your smell will be comforting. She needs a lovey --- blanket or stuffed animal. Does she have a night light? Is she warm/cool enough? Is it dark enough? Is there soothing music. Did you read her a book? Sing to her? Rock her? Did she get a bath? Try lavendar bath/lotion. Is she teething/growing? Try ibuprofin/acetametaphin. Is she wet? Try nighttime diapers. Does she have gas? Try mylicon. Just trying to brainstorm for you. This is a phase and it will pass. Get someone to help you so you can catch up on sleep.