5 Month Old Waking at Night; Falls Asleep on Own

Updated on April 07, 2009
A.L. asks from Milton, VT
12 answers

Hi moms. My third baby, who is now 5 months old, is doing something perplexing. He has been a pretty good sleeper all along, with a 5 or 6 hour stretch at the beginning of the night. He puts himself to sleep in his crib, happily chatting in the crib with no binky or whatever. But now he's waking up in the middle of the night and simply will NOT settle for anythign oother than breastfeeding. I enjoy nursing, and nurse him all day, but he's super robust and I know that he doesn't really need the middle of the night nutrition. I'm ok to nurse him 1 or 2 times each night, but he's asking for more now so I'm trying to figure out what to do. We've tried doing the "progressive waiting" thing (which worked really nicely for him learning to put himslef to sleep w/out too much crying) but in the middle of the night it doesn't seem to cry. Two nights he ended up crying TWO hours (with our periodic visits) and I just can't see doing that to him. This runs counter to what the books say about them being able to put themselves back to sleep once they've learned to self soothe to sleep. Any thoughts? Thanks so much.

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M.C.

answers from Providence on

Hi A., I too have a 5 month old who I breastfeed and he started doing the same thing. He falls asleep on his own listening to his little music box and for about 2-3 weeks he slept through the night and then all of a sudden he startd waking up around 3 or so. I have all 3 of the "What to expect" books and have read them and am still reading them with all 3 of my children. I have relied on them to give me advice for things such as this. It too says that at this age they shouldn't be waking up to eat and if they are then they may not be getting enough to eat during the day. I finally decided to introduce rice cereal to him and it seemed to do the trick. I mix it with breast milk so he still is getting that while he eats and then I wait a little while, maybe an hour or so and then I will breastfeed him. I hope this helps you, M..

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S.

answers from Boston on

I am not trying to be offensive at all, but do you guage your hunger on what a book says? All children are different, you should not be relying on a book to tell you how your son feels or so much what he needs.

I have 3 children, all of them exclusively breastfed. My boys, who were also robust did not sleep through the night until after they were a year old. They still needed those middle of the night feedings, AND they actually ate, not just suckled back to sleep. My 9 1/2 month old daughter still wakes on average every 2 hours, and she eats, then goes back to bed. A lot of babies still need the middle of the night feedings, and this is okay. Babies need to eat, and they need to eat frequently. So when he wakes in the middle of the night and he doesn't go back to sleep easily, feed him. It is okay. Just because he isn't doing what a book says doesn't mean he isn't normal. And if you need to rely on a book, find one that says it is normal for him to be eating in the middle of the night. But please, feed him. He is hungry.

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

Hi A.,
I have the EXACT same problem, and I think I bought all the sleep book on the market! Like you though, all the solutions provided have to do with teaching babies how to fall asleep on their own...which mine does without a problem. I nurse him, put him down fully awake, and he "talks" to himself, plays with a blanket...etc, usually for about 5 minutes or so and then peacefully falls asleep.

However, in the middle of the night, if I don't go in to nurse him, there's no going back to sleep. He'll cry and cry and cry. So weird. (Oh and he also wakes up at different times every night, so the techniques to changing the "habitual wakings" outlined in some books - like waking him an hour before he usually wakes up...etc. - can't be applied either !)

Our first son had horrible sleep associations, we had gotten into the habit of rocking him and rocking him to sleep and of course had to re-do it everytime he woke up (which I realized was out fault). But Jacks, our second, doesn't need one bit of help going down at naps or in the evening. So this is just so confusing.

The only thing I can tell you is that he is now 7 months old, and went from getting up 2 (sometimes 3 times) to nurse, to only once over the last 2 months...without me doing anything different (i would still nurse him every time he woke up). And over this past week, he's actually slept through the night (12+) hours, twice. We're still not "there yet" :) but I feel it's an improvement. I am still completely clueless as of why it has changed (and like your baby, mine definitely doesn't seem to need those extra feedings at night) but it has.

So hang in there! I know how you feel. It's so confusing and their behavior go against everything outlined in books, and it would just drive me nuts, not knowing what to do.
In the meantime, if you find a solution, please let me know !!!!

Good luck !
C.

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L.S.

answers from New London on

He may be teething or he may be going through a growth spurt and needs more food. Your lucky that he has been sleeping. I didn't get more than 3 or 4 hours until mine was on formula. You may want to try some tylenol before he goes to bed. You may try feeding him more during the day. My friends with bigger babies had hungrier babies, so maybe he just needs more milk during this time. I would also try rocking him to sleep, too. Perhaps it is his teeth and breastfeeding is his way of soothing himself. My son self-soothed at 10 months but on occasion would wake up in the middle of the night crying. And when he did it usually was because of his teeth.

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M.B.

answers from Hartford on

Are you sure he's not really truly hungry? He cold be going through a growth spurt. Although, at 5 or 6 months that's when they start to remember you. So if you go in there and without saying a word just show him you are still there and settle him down that could be it too. However, it doesn't sound like that's the issue. When you do nurse him is it a good I'm really hungry kind of feeding or just a playful kind of feeding? I think that is what will tell you the difference in truly hungry or just missing mom.

M.

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J.D.

answers from Boston on

He's surely hungry! Who said he didn't need the nutrition during the night? Try the Dr. Sears Nighttime Parenting book

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K.M.

answers from Boston on

my son went through the exact same issue and my pediatrician explained to me that b/w 3-6 months (some) babies go through a growth spurt and require more feedings for a while. I actually supplemented with one bottle of formula for my son during the night because it seemed to hold him longer than breastmilk. You might want to even think about introducing more solids during the day...just a few suggestions.

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M.C.

answers from Boston on

He could just be going through a growth spurt! =)

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S.F.

answers from Burlington on

Hi A.. I am certainly no expert especially because I have only had one child but I know exactly what you are going through. My husband and I had the same problem with my now 1 year old. Around five or six months she woke up at 1, 3, 5, and so on. I nursed her every time she woke and although she was robust, I did it more to sooth her and for my own sanity. At my daughter's six month appointment I expressed my concerns. She assured me that my daughter was plenty healthy and no longer needed night feedings. Instead of taking away all of her night feedings, I rationed her to one and of course the problem continued. I realized she needed all or nothing. She didn't understand that her mom would only allow her one feeding a night, it confused her. All she knew was that when she woke up her mom nursed her for comfort. My husband and I accomplished our first goal of teaching her to fall asleep on her own initially, now we had to allow her to fall asleep on her own when she wakes in the middle of the night. It was quite a battle, 2-3 weeks anyway. I just realized that if she learned to fall asleep without my aide it would be better for all of us. It is hard but be strong. If you are concerned your son is losing weight, call his doctor. My daughter sleeps great through the night 7pm-6:30am. She occasionally has a rough night when she is teething.

Good luck
S. F

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R.K.

answers from Springfield on

He is only 5 months old and nursing so he could be teething or growing. Either way I would let him nurse if he needs it

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M.Y.

answers from Boston on

My daughter has always slept great throught the night as well and started doing the same thing at about the same age as your little boy, I tried soothing her back to sleep and all she wanted was to breastfeed, after talking to my doctor (she also concurred that same as your little guy my daughter did not need a feeding until at least 5am due to her size) we did a "mommy ween" where we had my husband go into her room for that middle of the night cuddle session with a bottle of breastmilk (which she did not prefer) and sure enough after 2-3 nights of daddy visiting with adequate but not quite what she wanted she decided it was easier to just go back to sleep:) It might not work for everyone but it worked for us and now at 7 months she is sleeping from 7pm till 5am, breastfeeding and then going back to sleep till 730. This is definetly a schedule I can live with:P Hope this or something else works for you, we all need our beauty sleep. -Mel

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L.D.

answers from Boston on

Even though he is a robust five month old, he still needs to nurse during the night if he is breastfed, that is too young to go all night without nourishment!. Also, this is around the age that he really starts teething and that could be bothering him and keeping him up at night.Letting hm cry-it-out when is experiencing pain or discomfort is cruel I think. The answer? well, I would say just take him to bed with you, I'm sure others would argue. I think its the best way of feeding during the night, among many other benefits. Otherwise you have to get up to nurse and completely wake up, who want to completely wake up during the night? I've never had to disturb my sleep, my daughter is almost 8 months old and shares our bed. She just rolls over, nurses and we both sleep peacefully. We are going through the teething phase and it definitely makes her more cranky, you just have to be patient and know that this phase will pass. Check out http://askdrsears.com for other tried and true suggestions. Good luck!

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