4 Month Old Refuses a Bottle

Hi, my little girl did the same thing. At 4.5 months old, i had to just completle stop breastfeeding, I pumped for about 3 months. When asked, the doctor advised me just to "stop" breast feeding her, and told me she would eat when hungary enough. She did, but it was really hard to hear her cry, but they do eat when the get hungry enough.
good luck

Hi G.,

I had the EXACT same problem. I, too, was worried about nipple confusion and held back on the bottle. We tried every which way but loose to get him to take it (dad not mom, mom in another room, mom upstairs, mom out of the house, new nipples up the wazoo). By five months, I started on a sippy cup (Nuby) and found him to be more amiable. Only problem with the sippy cup is he'd end up playing and spitting out quite a bit of milk. I went back to work when he was seven months, and he was taking the cup quite well. At eight months, he took the bottle easily and at nine months is still going strong. It just takes time but will happen. Good luck.

You can try different nipples, and different positions. Try giving the bottle from behind, when he's in a bouncy chair for example. It's best if you are not around, out of the house. And just keep trying it every day, even if it's for a little bit and it gets you no where. Good luck!

I think Adiri is the bottle a mom mentioned in her response to your question. It really resembles the breast. You can find it at Babies R Us.

http://www.adiri.com/

Persistence is the key. There are some new bottles out there that really resemble the breast....I cannot remember their name, but I am sure you can find them on Babies R Us web-site. Sometimes finding the "right" nipple is the ticket. Also, when you give him to other people to feed him, make sure you are on the other side of the house. If you are nearby, he can smell/sense you, and will protest. Also, make sure he is really hungry when you try the bottle - don't starve him, but he needs to be really hungry.

Best wishes!

G., You've made me smile, remembering those days with my now almost 13 year old daughter! She was EXACTLY the same way. She'd also want NOTHING to ever do with a pacifier, spitting it across the room when I tried to give her one. It was me and me alone that could pacify her! She'd cry herself to sleep and scream like crazy (I used to say like someone was sticking her with needles) when anyone tried to give her a bottle (even if it was filled with my milk which I had gone through the agony of pumping!) It sounds like the same is true for you. You've probably also tried having other people (besides you and your husband) give him the bottle and you've probably also "left the house" when others have attempted to do so (like the "experts" say to do). I HAD to go back to work at the time, so what did it for us was leaving her in the hands of her godparents for an entire day, with only bottles to drink. She held out until the niddle of the afternoon, we were told. We didn't come to pick her up, though, until into the evening, after she had "downed" a couple of bottles. From then on, she never looked back! (And neither did I, I went "cold turkey" with the pumping, breast feeding that very day just in case it got her confused again.) Worked like a charm, even though I cried the whole day worrying about her, and then for days after because my boobs hurt so much!! If you absolutely want him to start drinking from the bottle (for whatever reason), my advice is to choose a person (or persons) that you trust wholeheartedly (like relatives, godparents, etc.) and spend the day trying to do something enjoyable with your husband away from the little guy! Wish there was an easier answer. They don't mention this problem in all of the books you read when you give birth, huh? (But there's plenty of warning about the nipple confusion)

He's not ready. Don't push it unless you have to, like you need to return to work. Each child is different. Start with alittle water in the bottle between feedings, add a little juice. Let him decide when he's ready to take the next step. Enjoy this time. Its' the closest you two will ever be. I'm sure your a great mom. Just remember every little step for you is a huge step for him. With your love and encouragement he'll get it.

My babies would only take Playtex Nursers Bottles with the drop ins. The nipple was the only kind they would use after I tried to wing them off the breast. All babies are diffrent so I don't know if that is the answer for you but it worked for me. Best of luck to you!

You may need to leave the house as some babies will not take a bottle if mom is around. Also try rbbing the nipple along the top gum this is what some babies do before taking the breast and waiting for milk let down. I would also contact your local La Leche League. Those mothers and leaders will have lots of suggestions. I went through the same thing with my daughter and one thing we found that helped was to try when she wasn't starving. If a bottle will not work you can try a small cup. Dr Jack Newmans book the Ultimate Guide to Breast feeding gives details on how to cup feed. One thing you dont say is if the bottle has formula or breast milk. If it is formula try pumping and giving breast milk. Your baby knows it is better stuff!

Hi G.,
My son nursed and bottle fed Milk I pumped and loved his binky!
My daughter, on the other hand, nursed nearly two years, refused a bottle and spit every binky out from the get go and never sucked her fingers. She exclusely nursed and at that time, I was in a stupor so I so appreciate where you are at! She also has significant disdain for for her crib which meant we were inseperable. Fast forward to her telling me it is time to get up...strolling in from her own room this morning.. She is turning 3 in January, drinks from a cup, "cuts" her food, "makes" sandwiches for me with her dad, packs her litle purse full of apples, climbs into her big girl bed, sings in the shower and uses the squeegy to boot! I share this because in a blink you will have these stories too. I soooo miss her infancy and my son is in school and I want to go back and just stare at their little faces. I am not sure if you work and have to get him to drink from a bottle but with my son, it was easier if my husband used the bottle with me not in the room and the few times my daughter did was with dad or nana! Also, if you use Advent bottles, do not squeeze them too tight or air gets trapped. Definately try different bottles, dr. Browns, etc..Hang in there!
God Bless you.

I had a friend who dipped just the nipple in apple juice before offering it to her son. Just a suggestion since it worked for her.

I suggest trying a different type of bottle. I had that problem with my daughter. I bought one of each type of bottle (Evenflow, Advent, Doctor Brown, and one other one I can't remember the name) and tried them until I found the one she would take. She prefered the Doctor Brown, which surprised me because the nipple looks nothing like a breast nipple but hey, she took it so that was all mattered. Maybe your baby just doesn't like that particular bottle nipple.

Good luck!

Jen

I watched the "Doctors" that comes on before Dr. Phil and Dr. Sears, the pediatrician, said the magic age is 4-6 weeks to introduce a bottle and if you try after that, it will fail. I gave my daughter a bottle at 3wks of age off and on and she took both breast and bottle but breastfeeding was so much easier, I stopped and she NEVER wanted a bottle after that so I was stuck until I could get her on a sippy cup. If you are a stay at home mom, I say just keep him on the breast but if you have to work, keep trying and good luck. Hopefully, he will respond in time.

Hi. Give him a bottle nipple to play with for a little bit daily...this way he'll grow acustomed to it...Then in a few days start offering him milk in a bottle again...make sure he's not hungry when he drinks from the bottle otherwise he'll get frustrated...he needs to have only good associations with the bottle. He'll be ok, just keep on offering it to him...we were in a same situation, and i've posted on here with the same question *also called a bunch of lactation consultants*. Now, my daughter loves her bottle..she falls asleep with it..and sometimes i feel she prefers it over my breast, although i am adamant about breastfeeding her when i am at home.

g'luck, J.

are you going back to work, if not the DO NOT STOP BREAStFEEDING YOUR BABY. I know there is no freedom when you breastfeed but I think it is worth it. I stop with both my kids when they were 13 mo.

good luck

M.

G.,

It brings back so many memories! My Roxy started off taking a bottle just fine when I wasn't available for her (I had to work and leave her during the day days a week) BUT at just shy of 5 months she decided that neither a bottle or a binky would do for her. We tried all sorts of things and nothing worked until we gave up and tried a sippy cup which she would take when she was really hungry. I would just nurse her when I dropped her off and as soon as I got there to pick her up. It certainly meant that we started on solid foods at 6 months so that she would have some staying power and some food choices.

She further drove me crazy by getting picky about even taking the milk that I had pumped! It led to her being totally weaned by 15 months because I was going on a trip that she could not go on with me. Miss Roxy is now 7 years old and healthy as can be. Hang in there, try all sorts of things and you will figure it out.

G.,

First and foremost, you are not starving your child. When he is hungry, he will eat. I KNOW this is much harder on you then him but why not try breast milk in a bottle as a transition? Then add a little formula at a time. As long as he is getting breast milk for 6-9 months, his immune system will continue to strengthen.

Good luck and God bless,
B.

I had the same problem. I just waited till I could give my daughter a sippy cup. Honestly, this is a very short period in life. That daughter I mentioned is now in high school.

I had the reverse problem with my first. I gave her the bottle too soon, and she rejected me. I read up on it for the 2nd kid. The consensus seems to be to introduce the bottle between 4-6 weeks. Introduce the bottle too late, and they won't take it. So in answer to your question, I don't think it's going to be easy. However, I would have Dad or someone regular try every day around the same time. I think persistance and a hungry tummy will win in the end. Also, a bottle that flows well.

I did the same thing and had the same problem. Well, I guess, have the same problem. I waited until about 2 months to try a bottle. I wish I hadn't let the lactation consultants scare me into doing that. It makes it REALLY hard to go out. My son gets really excited when he sees a bottle, but just because everything is a chew toy to him lately. He won't drink from it.
Then, a week ago, I had to get a wisdom tooth pulled and I couldn't breastfeed for 8 hours after having the anesthetics. The first feeding, he skipped because he wouldn't take the bottle. Cried himself to sleep. When he woke up, he was so hungry, he was hysterical. Cried for a little bit, but figured out how to suck from the bottle and drank the whole thing. He took the bottle, no problem, for the next feeding. Unfortunately, I think "starving" is the only way to convince them - they just prefer the breast. Either that, or just keep trying, every feeding. The problem is, if you only try a bottle for a few minutes and then resort to breastfeeding, they figure it out. They decide to hold out until what they really want is offered. If it's really important for him to take a bottle, then after that first initial "starved" bottle, keep offering bottles. Every feeding. Maybe that will work? (It just got to be too much of an effort for me, to work toward the bottle. Breastfeeding doesn't last too long, in the scheme of things. I'll just stick it out.)

i went through that with my own son. I was worried about nipple confusion also. He wouldn't take a bottle at all he would just chew on the nipples. So I went straight to using the sippy. Playtex has some sippy's that have soft lids. I gave them to my son to play with at first to get used to them and would also try letting him snack with them. I did have one sippy that wasn't a no spill so that the breastmilk would dribble onto his lips. Once he figured out how to swallow the milk from a sippy he loved it and I was able to give a sippy when he started solids. I still could never get him to use the bottle but he loves his sippy's.

Dear G.,
Your baby won't starve to death. Your heart may break in the process of getting him to try a bottle, but he won't starve.
Due to health reasons, I had to stop nursing quite abruptly just prior to going into the hospital. I hated hearing him cry for me. And I couldn't even hold him because he would try to lift up my shirt to get to the booby. It wasn't easy, but I was in the hospital for about a week and he took his bottle. I've mentioned this before, but my husband was afraid the bottles would spoil so he put ice cubes in them. After that, my son wouldn't take a bottle unless he could hear the ice rattling.
They have different types of bottle nipples. You might find one that he prefers over another kind. Just keep trying.
Best of wishes!

I completely sympathize! We have a 4 month old and went through this about a month or two ago. The advice we got and tried was to just kept trying-different positions, different bottles/nipples, and different people giving her the bottle (it was only my husband and I though). It's important not to force him or make it a battle. It took over a week, but what finally worked was to sit where I usually nurse her with the nursing pillow, nurse her for a few minutes to take the hunger off, and then calmly put the bottle to her lips. It ended up being me (the mom) that was able to give her the bottle, but I've heard from others that it's best for dad to keep trying the bottle b/c he may want the breast from mom, and that mom may have to leave the house (we tried that too with me waiting around in the backyard :) If he takes a pacifier, try a nipple with a similar shape. I think it's harder the older they are so it may take quite a while for a 4 month old. Best of luck to you.

He will take it if its all he gets. They know how to get what they want the second they are born. Dont give in just keep giving him the bottle. Fing one with a soft nipple or close to yours. I used the Playtex ones with great success.

are you giving him the bottle or is somebody else? that makes a big difference. i remember hiding in the living room while my boyfriend did his practice run with the bottle first thing in the morning and the first time our son cried for 45+ minutes. my man is very patient and soothing and it was so trying. i think the next time i may have left completely, but i dont think it was way better. the end result? it worked itself out. we made sure it was not a nipple flow issue (we got the orthodontic kind that are shaped a little funny) and my boyfriend walked and held him a lot to feed in the beginning. no laying in bed like with mom. i imagine it is really important for the feeder to maintain eye contact and say reassuring things just like you would while nursing, and i would not try with anything except breast milk to make sure thats not it. but really, dont we all know it is a poor substitute? the really important thing is that if you need to do it, you need to do it. and if thats true, be mentally prepared for a struggle and do your best to be calm calm calm throughout, because nobody wants to eat in stiff, stressed out arms or with somebody who is speaking in exasperated tones. a word of encouragement -- it didnt take very long for those guys to figure out their own system, and they happily woke up together many mornings when i had to go to work.

do you have the baby book (Dr Sears) i seem to remember tips for dads to bottle feed in there.

do you need to do this? if not, just put it on hold, and maybe skip the bottle and go to sippy cup when it is time for him to haveother liquids.

Hi G.,
I'm not sure why you are attempting to feed your son by bottle? If you are available to him when he wants to eat, the breast is the very best choice and your son knows it.

Guess this isn't very helpful, but I was wondering and want to congratulate you on having a very smart son.
S.

Hello- try changing his position my son just started daycare last week and will not take a bottle lying down but if you give it to sitting upright he is fine and he is breastfed the rest of the time also make sure it is as hot as the milk that comes out of you that was my daughters issue with the bottle