3 Year Old Will Pee Pee in Potty but Not Poopy

My daughter did the same thing, but I realized for her it was being scared more than anything, so one night when I knew she had to poop because she was going to hide, I put her on the potty, and we sat there for what seemed like forever. Finally she pooped and realized there was nothing to be scared of, and she hasn't had an accident since. Good Luck!!!

This is completely normal. And if you push the issue you will only have frustration and continued accidents in the near future.

Some children when potty training have not just a control issue but it is really a possesion that they have. It something that takes some children a little more time to let go of. And the hiding is the key to knowing whether she is ready or not. This is the exact scenario of a child who just isn't ready to let go yet. And honestly it won't be long at all becasue she will get to a point where she is ready... and you just have to be patient.

Now, if a bribe will work then more power to you. But this is something that is going to do more harm than good if you push and she just isn't ready. And trust me I've seen the end result of someone that pushed too hard.... and their child had accidents well past the normal age limit (way past), it's not fun. But you know what.... you will be fine and this will all be over very soon, and I do pray that it is within the time limit that you need it to happen!

Good luck!

Hm-m-m-m . . . Let's see. Do you know why she 'holds' her stool? Is it ever painful for her to 'go'? I think I'd try 'stuffing' her (well, not REALLY stuffing), but maybe slightly overloading her with very fibrous stuff like spinach, prunes, cabbage, melon, celery, oranges (whatever you can get her to eat lots of for a few days) and PUSH (well, encourage) fluids and help her digestive process along a bit. Also, can you tell by her actions/body language when she's needing to 'go'? That really helps, then you can go potty with her. My mom (born in 1919 and now in heaven) used to sit me on a potty with hot water in the bottom (helps relax the rectum). I think if she 'goes' a few times (with lots of praise, of course) you'll be done.

If you think she really can't help pooping in her pants, try not to bring attention to her 'accidents'. On the other hand, if you think she does have control over it -- and you had her clean up the pee on the floor, I'd carry through by having her empty her yukky (poopy) pants into the commode and having her (help) wash them out. Shouldn't take very many times!

Hope this helps!

P.S. I read your other posts and want to agree with 'not making TOO big a deal of it. It shouldn't become a 'match of wills. (I read an article in the '70's or '80's entitled 'Children are not for breaking' and was about 'breaking' kids from using their pants. It said that more child beatings happened (at that time) over potty training than any other issue. Just don't let this become 'your' issue. It's hers -- and she WILL 'get it' when she's ready.

Also, my mom had had hemmorhoid surgery 5 years before I was born, and her rectum shrunk (she didn't get to go back for her check-up afterward). This made her SO conscientious about everyone having regular (daily), soft stools that I think she worried too much about my 'constipation' (we have long bowels on my dad's side, and it simply takes longer for things to get through!)

Just keep your 'temper' (balanced composure) about how big the issue is!

well wat you should have did was just let her still have on a dipper and just let her peepee in if she dont tell u she have 2 use tha bathroom

The best thing I can tell you is to really back off. I literally spent several months washing out dirty panties because my daughter refused to poop in the potty. I made too much of an issue out of the deal. She pretty much showed me she was in control of the issue and finally pooped in the potty when she was good and ready. Not before. Hey, I also resorted to bribes. I told her she could pick out any toy at the toy store she wanted after a week of using the potty. Hated to do it but I hated cleaning those nasty panties out worse.

My son was the same way and it took about 6 months to get him to poop in the potty again. Don't stress-- the preschool still took him and helped him along. Once he did it, he never looked back! Good luck and I agree with relaxing and not focusing on it as much.

Mel

When I potty trained my son, he also did not want to poop on the potty at first. What I did was I found a treat that he really liked (for him it was candy necklaces.) He went with me to the store to buy the treat and I told him that he could only have it when he pooped in the potty. Then everytime he did he got the treat. It took about a month before he was going in the potty all the time. I hope this helps.

E., I guess my first question will be, does she sit on the potty when you ask her to try and poo? If she does, she may not know what to do to get the poo out. I think it is different than going in their pants so I told my daughter when she started potty training to try pushing out farts on the potty. At first all she did was grunt and groan but once she started "farting", the poo came naturally after that. It made it fun and not as scary as it would be just sitting there talking and waiting for things to happen. Hope this helps and good luck!

my daughter was not completely potty trained until she was 3years and 2months old. She also had problems with constipation and was, and still is, on miralax as needed. I stopped worrying about it and bugging her about it. She knew what she was suppose to do and I think it was embarrassing for her. When she had to poo she'd ask for a diaper. I would ask if she was sure and let her know I would leave the bathroom and give her privacy until she was done. I stopped pressing the issue and around the same time she began a two day a week preschool. Finally, one day, she decided to use the potty and voila...no more diapers.

try to keep her stools soft and don't press the issue.

good luck

My daughter is almost 3 1/2 and she is the same way despite having been potty trained for around a year now. Pooing is an ordeal in our house, and like your daughter she is on Myralax because she will hold it for so long. The doctor classified her as anal retentive, and this tends to be a comment trait among females on my mothers side of the family. I think part of it is that she was exclusively breastfed for a long time, and as a baby she could go two weeks without pooing, which is normal for a breastfed baby. By the time she was potty trained she was still only going once every three days.

We had her on 17mg-which is a full dose-for awhile and she actually got in the habit of pooing every day, and it was becoming less of an issue. She had CA-MRSA last recently, and I stopped giving her the Myralax because of the antibiotics and their side effects so pooping has once again become an issue.

So what we're doing is the 17mg, fiber cereal, no constipating foods like bananas and lots and lots of patience and time and books as I take her in there when I notice the signals she has to go and we sit and she pouts about it, but I am calm and just tell her she has to go. If she does go, we make a huge ordeal out of it, call Daddy so she can tell him, she might get a treat like a fruit popsicle, or we'll read an extra book at break or bed time-things like that. It took around a month last time for this to set in, and once it did she was going about three times a day, regularly without tears. And books-there are some great books out there on going potty, but one of my daughters favorites is Everybody Poops. It puts the issue on a level that makes it fun for kids.

I can also tell you this, I dont have to worry about poo incidents while we're away from home. She will only poo at home, and I can name several women in my family who are the same way. So you might find that even if you do get this straightened out by the time she hits preschool she might not poo while she is there anyways. So you might want to start a routine where she goes first thing in the morning and in the evenings.

Good luck, I really understand how frustrating this can be and I hope our situation has helped you some.

it may not be a control issue. she may just not be ready for that big step. you can not rush a child developing control of her bowels. she may not be holding it, she may just be a twice a week pooper. every person has there own pattern that they poop on. some go daily, or more often, other go weekly. the more you stress it, the worse it will get.

I would try different things for your daughter

1. Does she LOVE wearing big girl panties? If so, I would tell her that she is a big girl now and Mommy doesn't like cleaning up big girl poopoo that should go in the potty so for now on Mommy is not cleaning up your poopoo any more you are" I would make HER Clean them in the toilet, put them in the washer, sit on the couch while they are being washed, then put them in the dryer, then sit more. She doesn't get to play while she is cleaning her mess up.

The above worked with my son for about a week then he just liked playing in the toilet (gross) so I then went to cleaning him wtih a cold shower evertime he pooped in his pants (less than 2 min). 2 days later-NO MORE ACCIDENTS!

Oh how I agree with not pushing the issue. Children need respect and support in this area. My daughter had consitpation issues when it came to pooping. The more I focused on it the more she would fight the issue and not respond to incentives, etc. She would as well hold on to it for days and later be in great pain. I would also give her Miralax and still she would be afraid of pooping. And she would always ask for a diaper and would not pop at daycare. It is a true part of a child's development and processing in the brain. The process would overwelm my daughter. We worked with a psychologist and occupational therapist to help her with the issue since January of this year. Within 2 months her behavior and approached changed. Often when I knew she wanted a diaper - I would sit her on the potty and play "I Spy" and carry out a game of fun. This would take her mind off of the process and when she would experience the pain, etc. I would look her in the eye and encourage her that she is doing a great job, I am there to help her, and I am proud of her. After a month or so she was going on the potty without a diaper. In fact, the diaper is not an option now. She will often avoid going to the potty to have a poopy and I have to go with her. She sometimes will go on her on and ask for private time. She is beginning to develop a consistent time and routine for her daily poopy. Everything will fall into to place in its due time.
Great job Mom for reaching out.

You are not alone.
My 3 year old boy is the exact same way. He has been potty trained for #1 for about four MONTHS and will still not poop on the potty. I have tried bribing, etc...
Most of my friends (have older children) tell me to not make too big of an issue out of it and he'll do it when he's ready. He'll go in his room and shut the door and tell me to stay out while he does his business.