My 3 yo son's behavior over the past few weeks is slowly beginning to drive me batty! I need your suggestions on how to handle it! Background: he has always been a overall good kid, easy to raise and deal with, but these past 3-4 weeks have changed. To begin with, we went on a family vaca 1.5 weeks ago where he stayed in a cabin with our family and my parents and my brother; his schedule got pretty messed up (and he has always adjusted fine in the past) and we have been working on getting him back in 'order' since we got home and have done pretty well. Right now my biggest struggle with him is that every time I or anyone really, tells him No, he lays on the floor and cries (with no actual tears). For example, tonight he came out of his room, where he had been crying for 15 minutes and wanted a popsicle...no problem...then he asked for an ice cream cone and I told him that we didn't have any cones (nor have we ever) and he layed on the floor and cried. I swear he will lay there and cry as long as you will let him:) He has also been struggling with not listening, etc...but the toughest one for me is the crying. He bumped his head earlier tonight (nothing major) and came up crying, daddy made it feel better, then he proceeded to sit and cry for another 5 minutes. He reacts this way to anything....time to pick up toys, go to bed, have dinner (when he is playing)...whatever! and he does it for a loooooong time. My belief is that he starts crying because he is upset that he can't do, eat, play whatever he wants and then I think it turns into him being upset because his feelings are hurt. Please give me some advice!! I have read 1, 2, 3 Magic before...should I read it again? Any other advice?
Best thing to do with his crying is just walk out of the room.... first tell him .. "I am willing to talk to you when you stop crying. Come and find me when you are ready to talk." Then just walk out of the room, and don't give him the satisfaction of an audience.
well he is being 3 and trying to see what he gets away with, with being with grandparents he was probably spoiled a tad bit and is trying to see if he can get things out of you guys, it will pass, not listening may not be for a while as my 3 yr old is the same way
Welcome to the Terrible Threes. We're going through this with my son, too. He never really went through the Terrible Twos, but all my friends told me the Threes would be worse...and they were right! I think it's just part of raising a preschooler.
The "Terrible Threes" are worse than the "Terrible Twos" :(
When he starts to tantrum (yep, that's what it is) send him to his room and have him close the door behind him. Something about not having an audience usually stops them immediately, with my first child by the third time I started to walk him to his room he got up and stopped the nonsense, my daughter took about 10 times (a very stubborn child), my little guy twice. Tell him that when he stops crying you will talk to him, but don't give him his way even then.
1,2,3 Magic is good.
This may sound crazy, but when I have to deal with 3-year olds (and I do, a lot), I try to NEVER say NO. At this age the name of the game is redirecting.
Example: Kids frustrated and wants to hit you. I say, good punch! How hard can you hit this pillow? and make it a game.
Example: Kid wants popsicle 5 minutes before dinner. I grab a toy and give it to him. And then lead him away from the kitchen where the treats are.
Step 2: This takes skill and practice on your end, but you should always try to catch him doing the RIGHT thing and tell him that you like it!
Example: Kid asks nicely for a cookie. You say, "Wow! I love how nicely you asked! You can have a cookie after dinner. Hey, where are your Legos? Let's play with them! (redirecting...)
Example: Kid shares his toy with another 3 year old (it does happen). You say, I like the way you shared with Trevor...you're acting like a good big boy!
Example: You are out with your kid and you see another kid saying "please and thank you" to and adult. You comment: Wow, that is a nice boy--see how he's saying please? (Dollars to donuts, your kid will say please next time--make sure you comment on it!)
See how this works?
Still takes time and patience...but it sure cuts down on the hollering, domineering behavior, etc. And you're setting a very good example yourself!
P.S. The only time I say no, is when there is imminent danger, such as a child ready to run out into traffic. That way, my "no's" COUNT.
Three is a hard age I think. My kids act like this when they are tired, is he sleeping enough? Also make sure he has a balanced diet, sugar(sweets and carbs) highs and crashes make my kids crabby. Otherwise with my kids I walk off to a different room or send them to their room, ignore them, and tell them they could cry all they want but they have to do it alone. They rarely throw fits as they usually want to be included.
I hope noone suggested counseling. Cause that is the answer that you all give when kids are acting up. lol. My youngest son (he is 3 also) usd to try stunts like that and worse. I quickly reminded him who is the mama and who is the kid. I dont have those types of problems. My advice to you is totake control. YOU ARE THE PARENT AND HE IS THE KID. If you cant make him behave at 3 years old, I feel sorry for you for the years to come. At 1 years old they cant talk and is learning what "no, stop and dont " mean. But at 3, he know better. Im sure he is very smart.
That is pretty normal. He learned on vacation that when he cries he gets the attention he wants and sometimes gets what he wants. When my kids and grandkids went through this needless crying I would say "oh my, sounds like a tired boy and perhaps a nap is needed" I don't say it as punishment just stating a fact that crying for little or no reason usually means someone is tired. It is a habit that needs to be broke and if they think that you are going to think they are tired, they will stop. Good luck and remember this too shall pass.
