3 Month Old Not Sleeping Through the Night - Suggestions Please!

Normal behavior... co-sleeping usually solves the issue you have. You won't have to fully awaken to feed her when she's soundly sleeping right next to you.

She is normal...you need to get rest when you can. She won't sleep all night for several more months, she is growing. None of mine slept through the night until they were closer to 18-20 months. They have reached a sort of growth plateau at that age and stay the same or similar until about 3 years old.

Beware of books like Babywise. They teach you to ignore your baby's cues and try to make baby conform to your ideal situations. Current research has found that to not be good.

Your daughter is ONLY 3 months old. She's breastfed and should NOT be sleeping through the night yet given that she's so young, so little, and breastfeeding. Those are the facts. She should be waking to eat every 2 or 3 hours to eat. If she sleeps longer, count yourself lucky. Sleep when she sleeps.

She's normal. She's not old enough for cereal and if you give it to her it will mess up her digestive system since it's too immature to digest anything but breastmilk or formula.

For now you just have to let her sleep when she sleeps and feed her when she's hungry whenever that may be.

EDIT: Ezzo is a quack. I wouldn't trust a single word from any of his "advice" books.

EDIT AGAIN: YES this is NORMAL. I'm surprised there are people who are "shocked" that people are advising this mother that this is NORMAL newborn behavior and to suck it up. You do NOT sleep train a baby this young. You wait until the baby is at least 6-to-7 months old at the youngest, but ideally 9-to-12 months if you must.

I'm quite shocked personally at the people who are pushing setting a strict night time schedule such as with an idiot like Ezzo encourages for a BREASTFED BABY. Absolutely do not use Ezzo for an EBF newborn. It will be detrimental to the baby's health for sleep, for brain, for growth, for general development, for bonding.

She's 3 months old, she needs to eat. It's totally normal. It's possible for babies to sleep through the night this early. My son did, but he did NOT wake up needing to eat. I would say he's an exception, and that it's not all that normal. Your baby is not ready to sleep though the night, please (For your and her sake) don't try to force it.

Your daughter's sleeping/eating patterns are completely normal. Some babies are good sleepers through the night from early on and others become good sleepers later. I empathize with you since none of my 3 kids slept through the night early. Some day you will sleep, but just not right now. Parenting is a 24hr/ 7 day a week responsibility--that's what makes it so wonderful, yet exhausting.
Here's some good articles to read re: infant sleep. http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/31-ways-get-y....
If you are tempted to follow advise of books and well meaning friends to let her "cry it out", PLEASE read this first: http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/science-says-...
Congrats on becoming a Mom and breastfeeding. Nurse Midwife Mom of 3

I'm sorry, but she's normal. At most she should maybe go 4-5 hours between feedings. The only thing I can really suggest is that you try to nurse more often during the day and hopefully that helps keep her little tummy full and she sleeps better. My 9 month old still gets up every 5 hours or so.

3 months is way too early to expect a baby to sleep thru the night. Especially if she is breastfed. Formula fed babies usually start to sleep longer faster because formula is more dense and fills the baby up more but at 3 months your baby is still way to young to expect this out of her and again at 3 months she is right about on par for a growth spurt which will make her more hungry because she needs the food to grow
Good Luck - it does get better with time

Sounds perfectly normal. I'm sorry, that probably wasn't what you want to hear :(. But she is not big enough yet to not be hungry at least 2 or 3 times during the night. She won't be ready for night-weaning till 9 months, up till then she'll at least wake 1-2 times a night for a feed.

Please don't try giving her rice cereal, etc, to try and make her 'full' for longer. She's too young for that, and it's a bit of a myth anyway. Breastmilk, with all the protein, etc, is the most filling for her anyway, and her gut lining is not fully closed so it's not good for her to be ingesting regular food. (I say this because I have heard of moms trying to give their babies rice cereal as young as 2 months!)

My suggestion would be that if you have someone to help you (partner, husband, a friend of family member who could sleep over) that they give the baby a bottle of breastmilk for the middle feeding, or take over a whole night for you once or twice just so you can catch a break. My husband would help out this way especially on weekends when he wasn't going into work the next day. That was my sanity. During the week I handled it, and I would pump every night, maybe 3 ounces or so, so that I'd have enough milk for the weekend 'help' feedings. Or I'd do middle of the night, and he'd do the early morning, and let me sleep in.

And then I would just try and nap when the baby did in the day as well. I don't know if you're SAHM and if that is an option for you.

I know how desperate you feel - most of us do. We've been there. But it will pass. For now, it's hard. Sleep deprivation is not a funny thing.

Great sleep book is "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth.

BEWARE of Babywise. The AAP has even advised against it. The author is a crock, and his methods are harmful to babies, and can lead to 'failure to thrive'. It makes me so sad when moms recommend it. Yes, his methods may 'work' but they are not the best for the baby. Check out www.ezzo.info, and drmomma.org for more links to Babywise stuff.

Good luck and hang in there!

Good luck with that.

Sorry to say but you may not have that for awhile. My son (now 2.5) did not sleep through the night until he starting rolling over and I allowed him to sleep on his belly. Until 4 months, he ate every other hour…I am not kidding, he would wake up and eat and then sleep for an hour. Now my daughter (13 months) does not sleep through the night either. She wakes up at least 1 time. Good luck. Do you have a husband who you can flip flop nights with? That is what we do, we alternate nights.

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but this is completely normal. You're doing an awesome job by breastfeeding, and you can make it much easier on yourself if you cosleep and nurse in your sleep. I had to go back to work when my babies were less than 3 months old, & I lost almost no sleep with this method. My baby and I slept through most nursing sessions, and the cuddling was a nice bonus. Just please read up on how to safely cosleep, as it needs to be done properly to be safe. I'd also check out kellymom.com for any tips on nighttime breastfeeding - you will learn that you're doing a great job and that your baby's behavior is normal.

Re: the other posters who suggested Babywise or sleep-training, I'd use caution. Sleep training sounds like such a logical, convenient plan for exhausted mothers. The reality is that it teaches you to ignore your baby's cues, something that disturbs trust, breeds apathy, and doesn't support the breastfeeding relationship. I've done it both ways with my own children. With my daughter, she slept in her own crib (during the first few hours of each night), was fed both breastmilk and formula, was sleep-trained according to "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child", which taught us to let her cry it out, she SCREAMED for hours on end, stressed my husband & I out beyond belief each night and had issues sleeping for years, even with naps. She was 4 years old before she slept through the night. When we had our son, we did things differently. I took the valuable infant sleep info I learned from that book, & ignored everything else. We never let him cry it out, he was exclusively breastfed, we happily coslept (though he also started each night in his own crib), and he turned out to be a MUCH better sleeper! Because we nursed all night laying down, I never felt sleep-deprived and he never fussed in the night. My husband never had to wake up with the baby once. He was sleeping through the night (8 hours straight) by a year old, and 12 hours straight by 18 months. He naps so happily and easily, it almost makes me cry (after the naptime nightmare I went through with my daughter). I also feel a more trusting bond with my son than I do with my daughter, & I feel that the sleep-training (and lack thereof) played a factor in that.

Obviously, you should take all this advice with a grain of salt and do what works best for YOUR family. But I wanted to just throw in my two cents, for what it's worth. Good luck!

I can relate! Both my children were barracuda nursers! It felt like I was feeding them around the clock, and that was very taxing at night. Since I was exclusively b'feeding, I co-slept with my youngest (too scared to do it w my oldest and too exhausted to try anything else w my youngest!). It worked like a charm. Nursing mothers instinctively sleep in a protective position and your body clock adopts the rhythm of your child's - so I was naturally waking just as he was starting to stir for the next feeding. He co-slept with me until 4 months. Once he started giving me 4 hour stretches, he slept in the pack n play by my bed until 6 mos. Once we got to 5.5-6 hrs, we moved him to the crib in his sister's room. My son was never a great sleeper and didn't give me the full night until 15 mos but every baby is different (my daughter slept through the night, the full 10-12 hrs, at 4-5 mos). Just remember sleeping through the night isn't so much a physical milestone (how long they can go w/o milk) but a developmental one, much like crawling, walking and potty readiness. And I've told you my story so that if you decide to co-sleep, it doesn't necessarily mean you need to commit to it for the long haul. Doing it for a few weeks or months makes such a difference in helping you feel well rested, helping your baby feel safe and bonded, and ultimately, helping him sleep better :) Good luck! Remember this is a phase and it is part of the baby territory!

Um, yeah... she's three months old. That's pretty typical. I remember being pretty desperate when my twins were three months old too... but there's nothing you can do until she gets a bit older. Hang in there, in a few months she'll be waking only once or maybe not at all and you'll feel a lot more normal.

Breastfed babies usually don't sleep through the night for a while. Breastmilk goes through their lil bodies a lot faster than formula. So she is waking up from real hunger. If you tried to feed her and she didn't eat than it would probably be more of a personality thing. Ya know, like not wanting to sleep alone. But if you go in there in the middle of the night and she is REALLY eating than its normal.
Sorry to say, but unless you want to start formula supplements (which she doesn't need) It probably will be a few months before she can sleep through the night.
My daughter is Breastfed and didn't start sleeping through the night until she was around 8-9months old. Now she is almost one and still wakes up once in a while in the middle of the night to feed.
Advice..Sleep when she sleeps. During the day.. if she is down for a nap, FORGET the dishes and go take one too.

My 5 month old is not sleeping through the night--he still wakes 2 times and drinks an 8 oz bottle each time.

Patience is the only cure--she is too young to be expected to sleep thru the nite. When she is closer to 6 months you will begin to be able to sleep train her. Ask your pediatrician for recommendations of how to do it. (I use the Ferber method, but there are MANY different ways to achieve full night sleeping, but they all are based on the idea that you start around 6 mos.)

My daughter woke up to nurse twice per night (1:00 am and 5:00 am) until she was 11 months, then once per night until she was 13 months. Three months old is way to young to sleep through the night without eating. Hang in there and she will eventually sleep longer between feedings, and then some day sleep all night. As you said, she is truly hungry and needs to be fed.

She is still very young and you said it yourself, she is truly hungry and NEEDS to eat. I would keep her in your room so you could easily pick her up, change her, etc. I would nurse her while lying on my side so I could nod off a bit too while she is nursing. We were not co sleepers (same bed) because my husband could not sleep if our baby was in the bed for fear he would roll on him. I worried about that too, actually...but I did nod off here and there while nursing and after he was full and back to sleep, I put him back in his bed a foot away from mine. Yes, I was a walking zombie but I promise you will get through this. My guy did not consistently sleep all night until 19 months.

it wouldnt be normal for your infant to sleep through the night at this age. as you said your baby takes a full nursing . baby is hungry baby needs to be fed! breastmilk is so wonderful for baby it digests in 2 hours so your baby is almost doubling that time. formula is so hard for their little body to digest it takes twice as long. that is why peole think that formula fed babies sleep longer but studies have shown that is just not true. your baby needs to be fed when they are hungry. sooon there will be longer stretches, but then she will start to teethe and have growth spurts, illness etc. sleep will come dont worry and you will get used o this. my LO was sleeping through the night until his teeth coming in this week and now he is up ALL night. id love 3 hours of no interruption! enjoy what you have it could get WAY worse. cosleeping (bedsharing specifically)also makes htis easier so you dont have to get out of bed to nurse baby and can go back to sleep. good luck either way!

could be growth spurt, I am sure it won't last long..just ride it out.

sorry, sounds normal!

As you've already heard here, it's completely normal (if not expected) for a 3-month old to not sleep through the night. It stinks, I know. But to me, 3-month olds that do sleep through the night are the exception and not the norm. My boy didn't sleep fully through the night without any waking until he was almost 1! My daughter started right around 5 months, with little blips when she'd teethe.

Every child is different. And if your daughter is waking and needing to eat and she's really eating, then you keep doing what you're doing...she needs the extra nourishment! If she were just waking up solely for the reason of waking up and being social, that's a whole other situation.

Yes, being a new parent is exhausting. The HARD is what makes it GOOD!

Good luck to you. Sleep will come...eventually.

All these answers about it being normal confuse me. I know MANY babies that slept through the night around this time. For me "sleeping through the night" meant 10 or 11PM to 6 AM. I agree with the Babywise book suggestion! I totally think a schedule at this time is needed. The baby may need some guidance and 3 months old is plenty old to start. I made sure to schedule many feedings during the day and even woke them to eat so that they were full and could go a longer. There came a time that the baby should start some sort of regular schedule to help guide them into sleeping through the night. It will take some hard work, but in the end your uninterrupted sleep is worth it!!

She is not ready yet, sorry.
But you'll get there - eventually!

Out of all my friends with babies, I only know one 3 month old that slept through the night, and by "sleeping through the night" I mean sleeping 6 hours without waking to eat. The rest were getting up every 2-4 hours to eat. So based on that and all the many sleep books I've read (my son is a bad sleeper so I have read EVERYTHING I can about sleep), I'd say your daughter is completely normal. Really none of my friends' kids started sleeping for 6-7 hour stretches until around 5-6 months, and many still kept waking 1-2 times a night until a year or more. (As they get older, it's not so much about waking to eat. It's more about having trouble putting themselves back to sleep.) Actually, some of my friends' kids were still getting up every 1.5-2 hours at 3 months--they would have been very jealous you're getting 3.5 hours!

As long as you think she's hungry and not just wanting some cuddle time, I'd say feeding her until she's full is exactly what you should be doing here. If she's gaining weight and developing properly, you're doing a great job! Hopefully she'll settle down shortly and you'll start getting longer stretches of sleep. I know from experience how tough that is, and what a lack of sleep can do to you. Hang in there!

Hi Kelly,

I hate to break it to you, but this is totally normal. Sleeping through the night at her age would only be a 5-hour stretch. Both of my kids are/were the same way. Eventually, babies are able to sleep longer without nursing. But breastfed babies may be more likely to wake up more frequently. So I would just focus on getting you some more sleep. If you have a partner, have him/her bring the baby to you/change diapers/etc. during the night, so that all you have to do is nurse. Also, if you are not working regular hours, try to catch up on sleep a bit during the day -- either sleep when baby sleeps or find someone to watch the baby for a few hours. The best thing to do (and how I survived with my 3.5-year-old and now w/ my 5-month-old) is to learn how to nurse lying down. This is what I wind up doing in the wee hours of the morning when I am simply too exhausted to get up. I think everyone gets a bit more sleep this way. We do this for naps (when there's someone to be with my older child), too.

Good luck!
R.

I'm perplexed by the moms who are saying 3 months is too early to sleep through the night. It's really not. Check out the book "On Becoming Babywise" by Gary Ezzo. He's very pro-breastfeeding, and it's a very easy read. A friend of mine recommended it to me before I had my second child, and it was a lifesaver for me. In a nutshell, it's about planning out your and your baby's day around a routine - obviously the routine can be adjusted as you both need it to, but it made an incredible difference for me, and I was much more successful at breastfeeding my second child, and she slept through the night at a month old (yes, really). BTW, there is nothing radical or new about Babywise - I shared with my grandmother (the mother of 7 herself), and she said, "Well, that's hardly news. It's what every mother everywhere did in my day." So, check it out... hopefully it helps! :)