3 1/2 Month Old Not Sleeping

Updated on August 04, 2008
J.M. asks from Irving, TX
43 answers

We are at are wits end. My three month old is a gem during the day. He is hardly ever fussy. He will take a couple of short naps, maybe an hour during the day. We make sure he has play time and quiet time. He is breast fed only right now. He eats about every three hours during the day. He still does not sleep through the night. We have tried everything. Mainly he just wants comfort, he doesn't always eat during the night, so I have even tried giving him a pacifier and that worked once, but then not the next night, he just won't sleep longer than three or four hours. He also won't sleep if we put him back in his bed. We have the co-sleeper set up next to us. He is a big boy, 16lbs. We tried cereal too, and I think he actually woke up sooner. He will fall right back to sleep after he nurses. We have tried letting him cry, but he will work himself up into a complete fit. Any suggestions would be helpful.

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So What Happened?

Wow - I am overwhelmed by the support and responses. I think the best answer for me is to wait it out. I think I was looking for some reassurance that I was not alone in my struggle and I know I am definitely not! C is healthy and happy in every way and I am sure a five or six hour stretch of sleep is somewhere in my near future! There are no quick fixes for our kids and there are no common fixes! I need to just cherish his baby years. I know with my 13 yr old they grow so fast!
I also know to turn to Mamasource for any future problems or questions.
Thank you!

Featured Answers

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G.W.

answers from Tyler on

GIve him a little more cereal right before you lay him down. As long as he's fed/clean/not in harms way, he'll be okay.

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S.S.

answers from Dallas on

He is very young to be sleeping through the night! In fact I think most people would be jealous if her were! I say keep it up and give him a few more months!

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J.F.

answers from Dallas on

I hate to have to tell you this, but he may just not be ready to sleep through the night. Everything I've read suggests that sleeping through the night has as much to do with mental development as it does with how much/what they eat. Sometimes it just takes them awhile to realize that they can go back to sleep on their own. My little one didn't sleep through the night until around 6 months. Also, feeding cereal this early might cause him to have an upset stomach, so I'd avoid it (especially if it made it worse the first time). Hang in there! It won't last forever.

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T.G.

answers from Dallas on

3 1/2 months old is too young to let cry it out.

My son had the same problem from the get go- turned out he was allergic to everything being put in his mouth - in turn it caused him terrible ear infections. 2 surgies later (to install ear tubes) and all allergies known - he's a completely different baby. Sleeps at least 8+ hrs. a night. With 2 naps still!

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E.J.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J., you have a smart baby. He knows that it's much more fun to be with you than to sleep. I highly recommend that you spend $15 and buy this book: Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Eric Weissbluth. His advice is spot on, and it's based on research and experience. It has worked for both my kids (now 2 & 4), as well as other parents I know who have used it. I refer to it often as my kids mature and their sleep habits change. The book is worth its weight in gold, and it specifically addresses your situation. Congrats on that baby boy, and best of luck!

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K.B.

answers from Dallas on

I would look at how he is putting himself to sleep. Are you helping him or does he do it completely on his own? Also, what time is he going to bed? We discovered on baby number one that the earlier we put our kids to bed the longer they sleep at night. It is counterintuituve, but it works. Mine have all gone to bed between 6:45 pm to 7:30 pm. My 12 week old just slept 12 hours last night and he puts himself to sleep (goes in the bed fully awake) and I put him down at 6:55 pm. I have always used Dr. Marc Weisbluths book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" as a resource. Good Luck.

B.H.

answers from Dallas on

Everything he is doing is completely normal for his age. I can recommend reading Dr. Sears' Breastfeeding book. It has very gentle approaches to getting a kid to sleep on his own. It is a learned process, so it will take him a while, but he will get there. I can assure you that when he is a couple of years older, you will forget about all the lost sleep, and only remember the tender little baby. Cherish these moments, nurse him back to sleep, comfort him whenever he needs it, and he will become a self assured little guy before your eyes. Love, and Time is all he needs. Please Don't let him cry it out.
I am the mother of a 3 year old boy, who breastfed night and day for over a year, and I would love those days back!! He is self-assured, and sleeps in his own room, and in his own bed, through the night for at least a year. It will come.

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J.B.

answers from Dallas on

Maybe acid reflux is to blame. Sometimes, it's only a problem when the child lays down. That could explain daytime naps and nighttime. Try letting him sleep in a swing in your room. The cereal might be making his stomach worse. You could also ask your ped about Mylanta. about 1/4 t up to 4 times a day did the trick for my kiddo.
Also, might want to avoid some things in your diet, like dairy, broccoli, etc...see if that helps.
Good luck!

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

I moved both children's cribs into our rooms when they were younger. My daugther started sleeping through the night at around 3 1/2 months and my son was 6 weeks old. So as you can see no two kids are the same. It might help him get use to sleeping in his bed if you move it into your room. I put it right next to our bed with the rail down when they slept at night. They would take all their naps in it and finally once they started turning over I moved them into their own room. It was really not h*** o* them at all since they were so use to sleeping in the crib already. It might be worth a try and he will start sleeping through the night soon just hang in there.

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M.G.

answers from Dallas on

I nursed my 4 kids (including twins) and my experience is that @ only 3 mo old his little tummy can't hold much at a feeding; so it's NORMAL for him to wake up every few hours! This won't last forever; he is an INFANT!!! People who brag about their infants "sleeping thru the night" and worse, get them started on solids when they're being perfectly nourished with breastmilk in the hope of the elusive "sleeping thru the night" are misguided in my opinion. I don't believe in the "letting him cry" when he's this young - he needs to develop trust that his cries for help will be responded to. Just hang in there and do what comes naturally and don't rush his infancy.

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K.T.

answers from Lubbock on

I feel your pain, J.!! I remember those days (and nights!) very well...and I'll be doing it again soon. You've gotten a lot of responses, but I do want to add my voice to the "that is normal" opinion. It is. Sorry!!! I think we have a tendency to say that a baby "just" wants comfort when he wakes, but for an infant comfort is a MAJOR need. I thought the cry-it-out approach sounded logical until I had a baby and I understood how they work. At this age your baby only cries if he has a real need, be it hunger or comfort, etc. So go to him. Do whatever you can to stay sane, but don't set your sights on consistent sleeping through the night for awhile. Maybe he'll do it early, but if not...not. Some of the tips in the books mentioned may really help, but I just wouldn't make it a goal if I were you...then you won't be disappointed or think your baby is unusal. I went through all of that myself. Looking back, it would've been much easierif MY expectations we more normal! This is the hardest part. It will get easier, then all of a sudden, when you've resigned yourself to never sleeping again...he will, and you will!

As a health professional I will advise you NEVER to give rice cereal to your baby until 6 months of age, and then, NOT in a bottle. It can cause a slew of digestive problems and even make your baby prone to food allergies. NO studies have shown cereal to be effective in either inducing better sleep or in preventing refux. Many have shown it to be contraindicated for the reasons mentioned above.

You can do it! I'm doing a cheer for you! Send this email back to me in a few months when I'm writing in desparate for more than 3 hours of sleep!!!

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K.

answers from Dallas on

I'm sure everyone will have their opinion about this but here's the thing, they aren't SUPPOSED to sleep through the night at 3 1/2 months. Some babies do, but despite what all the books say, MOST babies don't. Especially breast fed babies. They're still really new and adjusting to the world. Instead of making yourself crazy, know that you are doing the right thing by comforting your baby and your baby is not in any way abnormal! And eventually they all sleep. I say this as the mother of a 3 year old who sleeps great (but didn't at first) and a 4 month old who is up at least 3 times a night. Hang in there!

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

J.,

If you are a breastfeeding, co-sleeping mom, try getting the book "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley.

There is not likely anything "wrong" with your son. My daugther did the same thing. The most annoying question from inquiring minds who want to know is "does he sleep through the night yet?" It is impossible not to feel there is something wrong with your very normal baby when bombarded with these clueless and unnecessary inquiries. I guess some people can't think of anything else to ask.

Elizabeth explains it all. She has sensible, sensitive tips on getting more sleep.

Good luck.

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C.A.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J.,

I agree that 3 1/2 months may be a little early for sleeping through the night for a breastfed baby. But, to me it sounds like he isn't getting enough sleep during the day. Babies who sleep better during the day sleep better at night. I highly recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. It discusses sleep rhythms for babies and children and how to give them the right sleep at the right time so that everyone can be better rested.

Congratulations and good luck!
C.

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P.B.

answers from Tyler on

I could not have my boys in the same room with me at night; they too would wake up (I beleive the can "smell" you).

Here are a few ideas to try:

Put a night gown or shirt that you have worn in the crib. This will make him think you are there with him.

Try a large swaddle blanket (I had big boys too and I know it will take a big one) usually a quilted one. It feels like someone is holding him.

Turn on a fan in the room (oscilating is best) to make a soothing noise (also to cool him down while being swaddled in the quilt). My 11yo STILL likes the fan in his room. :o)

These are what worked for me. Hope it helps.

Blessings,

P. <><

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

Hey, you might be expecting a bit much from a 3 1/2 month old. My eldest daughter (now 13 years) was a lot like that. At about 5 months we had to "force" the issue by letting her cry it out. And yes, she worked herself up -- first night I believe she cried for over an hour and a half -- but by the 4th night she was sleeping and has been a great sleeper ever since. Fortunatley, my other two girls (ages 9 years and 18 months) started sleeping through the night in their 4th month!

I wish I had some magic answer for you. There are several methods for changing sleep patterns, from the extreme (such as what I did) to the "gradual" method. You need to decide what you are comfortable with, then stick with it, but consistency is key to being successful. You may want to do this in stages -- first, get him into his own room, then work on getting rid of the first wakeup 3-4 hours after you put him down.

Don't worry . . . it will happen! Good luck!

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K.R.

answers from Dallas on

Girl, good luck, my son did the same thing... I ended up putting him in bed with us and that was the only way he would sleep.. But it was the worst thing we could have done... We got no time together.. My son loved sleeping with us.. But we did not sleep.. When he was crazy crying I would turn on the vaccume and at times that would make him fall asleep.. the humming form the vaccume would work more than not..

Best of luck
k

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A.A.

answers from Dallas on

Not that this advice will help but... my 6 month old (after sleeping through the night 3-4 times over a 2 month period - yes, that's all) has decided to wake up every 2 hours just like a newborn. Many people have suggested Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child for us and we are currently reading it. At this point, my husband and I are in shifts. He'll stay up late with her while I go to bed early and then he'll come to bed and if she's awake, I'll be on baby duty. My suggestions are pretty general, but if you can sleep during the day, do it. Everyone is telling me to be patient, so that's my advice for you. Be grateful for your time with the little one and try to be happy at night, they sense that frustration sometimes and it only seems to make things worse.

I feel for you! Good Luck!

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N.P.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J.. My baby boy is now 15 months old and started sleeping through the night at 1 week old. I read the book Baby Wise and got him on a schedule immediatly. I breastfed Ethan excluseivly for 7 months. I am a work from home Momma so the need to have a predictable schedule was very important to me. I was not as "strict" as they mention in the book, however, Ethan took right to the schedule and has been such an amazing sleeper through the night. At 1 week old he was sleeping 5 hours through the night (not much, but at a week old I was happy!) and now at 15 months he sleeps 12-14 hours through the night. You can buy Baby Wise from any retailer or even borrow it from your local library. Good luck!

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

I exclusively breastfed both my boys (who are now almost 4 and 13 months old). The thing that worked with both of them was making sure they nursed a lot during the day. I think the fact you say he falls back asleep when he nurses in the middle of the night says he is wanting the milk, even if he doesn't always seem like it. Breastfed babies, unfortunately, need to eat more often than formula babies. I fed both of them every 2 hours during the day and they were both sleeping 5 hours at night by 6 weeks and sleeping 8 hours a night by 4 months. It is a pain, but at least it is only for a few months, or for you even less. Once they start eating solids around 5 months you can nurse less often.

You also need to make sure you are letting him know the difference between day and night--keeping it light during the day by opening shades-making sure you are quiet at night.

Anyway, I hope that helps!

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J.H.

answers from Dallas on

It is normal for a baby to not sleep through the night at 3 1/2 months old. It's normal for them not to sleep through the night at 6 months old. It's normal for them not to sleep through the night at 9 months old! Most babies will wake up to eat twice during the night until they are 9 months old (or older). Everyone that has had a baby has had "sleep problems." I put that in quotations because I really don't consider babies not sleeping at night a problem; they are babies, after all. Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child, which several posters have recommended, really does have great information in it that will help you understand the times that your baby needs sleep and also explains the scientific reason for his sleep needs. There is also an explanation for why feeding cereal won't help with his sleep. My daughter is 8 months old, breastfed, and wakes up one, two, or three times a night. It's never the same, but I don't expect it to be. To make it through the nights and days without straight sleep, we put her to bed early (like the book explains) and we go to bed by 9. So, even though we are getting interrupted sleep, we are pretty rested most days.
3 1/2 month olds definitely still need comforting. They were in a nice, secure, warm, safe place for 9 months, and they've only been in this new world for 1/3 of that time.

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G.H.

answers from Dallas on

I don't think many 3 1/2 month olds sleep through the night.. especially those that are breastfed! My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was 12 months old, she only started then because she stopped nursing.. My son (definitely an exception) is 16 months old and does not sleep through the night.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

DD is 18 months old and just now started sleeping through the night. All kids are different, some sleep all night at 2 months, and some don't untill 18months, i really don't think its anything to be too concerned about.

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L.C.

answers from Dallas on

3 1/2 months is very young and they don't always sleep thru the night by that young age. Some take longer. I would say try to be patient. Mine didn't sleep thru the night until 6 months.

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I think it is a little early to expect him to sleep throught the night. It sounds like he is still hungry. Remember each child is different. My son started sleeping throught the night at 2 mo. but at 4 mo. he started waking again. Just be patient. Things will get better. If you are too tired to get up with him at night, try pumping and let your husband help you out. Good luck.

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R.H.

answers from Dallas on

It's great that you are breast feeding-babies stomachs are not truly ready for food until six months so I would hold off on the cereal if I were you. Even pediatricians say wait until after four months. Everyone else says six. My son did not sleep through the night at all until he was 10 months. He would wake up, I would nurse him and he would fall right back to sleep before he started sleeping all night. Since your son falls right back to sleep after he nurses I don't think you have any reason to be concerned at 3 1/2 months. In my situation our pediatician said my son was waking up either because he's hungry or because it's a habit. This was at his nine month check-up. At anytime your baby may be having a growth spurt and need those nighttime feedings. I decided to err on the side of caution and treat him as if he was hungry and not treat him like I needed to break him of a bad habit. Eventually he started sleeping through the night in his own time-10 months old.

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T.M.

answers from Dallas on

He is only 3 1/2 months old !!! Of course he isn't sleeping through the night. It may be a few more months before he sleeps longer. He is still so little and all kids are different. I know it is hard, but it won't be forever.

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D.W.

answers from Dallas on

J.-
Good luck! I have a 13 month old, who sounds just like your little one. It wasn't until he was 6 months until he slept through the night. We did better when we started following a structured routine (at 6 months) and when he started eating solids. He may be associating nursing with comfort and sleeping. I'd suggest in the evening you make sure he doesn't nurse himself to sleep. This helped for us.

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B.H.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J., I too am a mother of two boys, 11yrs and 4 mos. I also breastfeed. We have just recently been getting some sleep. Last night he even went 7.5 hours straight. Over the last week he has gradually increased the length. I am not a cry it out supporter. Although, I did make a schedule based on his daily needs and then stuck to it. He did lie in bed and fuss at first, he was not crying hysterically just fussing. If he he did cry hard I would get him and reassure him, even laid down and nursed him, but before he was out cold I put him back in bed. We also put him in those sleep sacks, he will eventually understand when I get this on its time to sleep. I also use white noise and sleepytime music. A short nap at 10, a longer nap at 2 then bed by 8 usually 7:30. The going to bed earlier really helped too, before we tried to keep him up late, DID NOT work. Incidently, the afternoon nap he wakes after 30 minutes and I have to cuddle him and nurse a bit then he will go back to sleep for over 2 hours. Thats not ideal and I hope to wean him off of it but I do enjoy napping myself at that time and as you know the time goes by fast and soon he will be off playing and I'll miss these days. We too had more problems if we fed him right before bed. About 1 hour before bed was best for him. He was very ready for cereal, always watches people eating and can't eat his cereal fast enough, I am thinking about giving him some in the am but think I will wait till 5mo.
I nursed my older son 27 months and I am very thankful I did. I plan on doing the same with my second.
Have fun with your baby!

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

When my son was born he was 6 lbs. He took the normal bottle servings, but when he was 3-1/2 months old one day he cried and cried and screamed when I would try to feed him. I hadn't tried cereal yet, but he seemed hungry for something. I had stocked up on some baby food and an "infafeeder". That is a feeder that you put baby food (stage 1/puree) in it and they suck it out thru a nipple just like a bottle. The nipple is cross cut to allow the thicker substance to pass thru. He was so fussy I ran to the pantry and got a jar of plums and put it in the infafeeder and gave it to him. On the first suck, his little eyes got big and he looked at me and kept sucking it down. No more crying or fussing. I called the doctor the next day and he said it was fine, but not to start him on the sweet stuff or he wouldn't eat the veggies. At 16 pounds, your little guy is probably "hungry". He's growing fast and maybe milk just isn't enough. I do believe that there is a difference between nutrition and hunger. Breast milk is a great nutrition, but it may not be filling for him now. But don't discontinue it, just add something else to it. Start slow, 1/2 jar 2x per day and Cereal at night before bedtime is good. About sleeping at night. He's on a feeding schedule so he's probably going to wake up until his schedule changes or he is fuller at each meal. My son woke up every 3 hours until he was 11 months old. I learned he wasn't really hungry, he was just used to waking up. We had a nightlight in his room too. That light was just enough to make him think that it was time to wake up. My sister-in-law kept him one night, he slept in total darkness, and he never woke up (and he learned to go back to sleep). So after that, no light, and he slept thru the night. Won't hurt to try it. My son is now 16 years old and healthy. He never developed any allergies to any foods, and he sleeps all night! haha

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U.A.

answers from Dallas on

I know it's difficult, but he sounds like a typical 3 1/2 month old to me. Most do not sleep through the night. I would have been happy if mine slept 3 hours straight back then. Cereal this soon before bed might even give him a tummy ache. Hang in there. Do whatever works even if that means keeping him on your bed with you (safely of course). Good luck! I know how you feel...

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J.B.

answers from Tyler on

I know the amount of responses is overwhelming and every one of them are different b/c all babies are different!!! but i just wanted to HIGHLY recommend "Babywise" my son started sleeping through the night around 2 mo old, which is very early, and i think a lot had to do with following that book. And trust me, the 1st 2 mo were very hard and he did not sleep through the night at all before that so it's not like we didn't struggle. but i took notes on that book and i have also heard from lots of other moms that have used it say their babies slept through the night early too. i would also recommend supplementing with formula at your late night feeding (not cereal) i recommend enfamil gentlease. also pump to make sure you're producing enough milk--should be at least 4-6 oz each feeding. good luck! J.

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

This is a tough one. As long as you sure there is nothing else wrong, i.e. ear infection, etc. I would let him cry it out with supervision. If he is able to go without food during the night (meaning if he has slept through the night without needing a feeding already), then I would cut out the night feedings altogether. You have to stay consistant to make it work. When my daughter turned around 3 months she started not needing that night feeding by showing me that she could sleep through the night at least a few times. One night she started crying in the middle of the night. I snuck in to check on her to make sure there was nothing else going on. I changed her diaper in the crib - did not take her out of the crib for any reason. Then returned back to my room. She cried for a while; however, eventually stopped. My husband kept asking me, "are you sure she is not hungry?" I told him that she had a good feeding before going to bed and she has shown me that she can sleep through the night without needing another already. You just need to be strong and do not take him out of the crib for any reason. If you need to do any soothing or diaper changing do it in the crib. If you take him out of the crib one night, then you just have to start over again b/c that is what they start to expect. This is the toughest part of being a mother... letting your child cry and not comforting him by taking him out of the crib. Also, if you really, really want to feed him, then do it the crib. If he is sleeping until 4am, that is considered sleeping through the night at this point!!

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J.C.

answers from Dallas on

J.,
Hi, I completely feel your pain. I am the mother of 4 childen and I can proudly say that getting them to sleep through the night was my number one concern, I can also proudly say that all 4 were sleeping over 8 hours by 3 months of age. This did not happen naturally or by luck, which is what most people think. As a parent, one of our jobs is to teach our children how to sleep and if the child is over 10 pounds and can comfort themselves, this is totally possible.
I am assuming you will get lots of letters telling you that 3 1/2 months is too early to expect this, that is a bunch of bull. I can tell you what I did and hopefully this will help give you some ideas.
First, I stopped nursing in the middle of the night. Instead, if the baby needed food, I used a bottle of breast milk. This way the baby wasn't using my smell or the warmth of the skin to skin to fall back to sleep. Once I realized that the baby was big enough not to need food, I started diluting the breast milk with water until eventually I got down to just water. I still warmed it up, just like the milk, but instead, it was water. After a few nights of just water, my kids just figured, "why get up for water".
This sounds very simple, but there were a few other things that I made sure I did. One, I never brought the kids into my bed, not even to nurse. I knew if I did this, the baby would never leave. I knew it would be too convienent for me and just delay the process. Second, don't get up the second you hear him making noise. Sometimes babies cry out while they are sleeping and if you are already in the room, he will want to get up. I did not even use a monitor at night, if the baby needs you, you will know and you are not waking up to every, little noise. Third, cause as little diturbance as possible. Don't turn on any lights, just use a nightlight, talk to him as little as possible, try to use the least amount of comfort issues as possible.
Fourth, and this is a big one, leave a special item in the crib and only in the crib. This could be a blanket, stuffed toy, one of your shirts, anything that he really likes. This way, he will want to get into the crib. I had several pacifiers that I left in the crib. If your child doesn't take one, you may need to try several to see which one he likes. Some shapes are preferred over others. All babies have a reflexive, sucking pattern that can help you with soothing. Weaning from the pacifier is a differnet issue, that I will also help you with if you want. Don't let this stop you from using one, my kid's pacifier saved my life. I definitely forced it on every one, except my fourth, she used her thumb.
Lastly, I used a sound and motion machine in their cribs. Mine was called "Peaceful, Planet Aquarium", but I don't think they make that one any more. Turn it on every time you put him down, this way he associates this sound with sleeping. I bought one for my mom's crib, my mother-in-laws crib and I always brought it with us on vacation. I could attach it to the port-a-crib, throw in her pacifiers, and her blankets and she had no problems when we were out of town.
I almost forgot, my third child also had issues with waking when she got TOO much food before bed. Everyone thinks more food will keep their bellies full, but sometimes just the opposite is true. Almost like Thanksgiving when going to bed stuffed makes you starving in the morning. Just use a couple more ounces for the last feeding than you normally give him.
Sorry, one more thing, your night, his night probably won't start till about midnight or maybe eleven. Then, when he wakes at seven or eight, this will be a normal rising hour. If you try to put him down for the night at 7 or 8 in the evening, then of course he will wake up in the middle of the night. The time he goes to bed will get earlier and earlier as he gets older, but his rising time will stay the same.
I hope some of this helps. Just remember to be consistent and try things several nights in a row before you decide it doesn't work. It takes atleast 3 nights before a habit can be established. This is important, for his health and yours and the more time you spend with this now, the fewer you will have to deal with it later. I have many friends who still have sleeping issues with their 3,4,5 and 6 year olds because they never trained their kids how to comfort themselves and return to sleep. It's not luck, it is training.
Good luck, let me know the outcome, J.

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T.J.

answers from Oklahoma City on

3 1/2 months is way too early to expect a baby to sleep through the night. It is also too soon for cereal & WAY too soon to consider letting them cry it out.

Just because a baby slept through the night once doesn't mean they are ready to do it every night. They go through growth spurts at 3 months and again at 6 months & "regular" sleep and eating patterns go right out the door. Then there is teething that can affect sleep for the next 2 years.

My 7 month old has slept through the night (which for an infant is 5-8 hours straight not the 12 we'd really like for them to sleep) a couple of times but normal for her is waking to eat 2-3 times. Her biggest sister slept through the night 12 hours straight starting at 5 months & her other big sister didn't really sleep through consistently until she turned 2 years.

We did the same things with each of them but babies are all different. I would recommend the books others have mentioned but most importnantly you need to adjust your expectations of him. 3 1/2 months is still a brand new baby.

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L.D.

answers from Sherman on

Your baby is normal. 3 hours is about right because breast milk is so perfect and pure that it digests easily.
Try drinking some mother's milk tea to up your supply so it can fill his belly easier. A friend of mine did this (drank 5 cups a day) and went from 3hr. feedings to a 7hr. sleep time. The tea also alleviated my daughter's colic.
BEFORE YOU ACCEPT THE "CRY IT OUT" ADVICE, DO SOME RESEARCH ON THE LONG TERM RAMIFICATIONS OF MAKING THEM CRY IT OUT.... GOOGLE "HARVARD CRY IT OUT" AND SEE HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT IT.

Another thing... One of my closest friends is a nurse on the pediatric ward. Babies this young forced to sleep through the night often "sleep well" because they are forced in to low blood sugar, making them slightly comatose. You can research that one too!

There is a book called "Babywise" that is currently being lobbied by many pediatricians to have taken off of the shelf. Most of the so-called research is made up and can not be found anywhere. Babies have died because of failure to thrive, and the techniques in that book advise parents on how to do just that - create a "failure to thrive" environment!

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S.C.

answers from Dallas on

All three of my children were breast fed only until 6 months. They all sleep thru the night by one month old. I swaddled them ( some baby's do not like it at first) I also uses a fan for white noise. When they would cry I would go in and pat them or touch them but would not pick them up. They all have good sleep habits as teenagers. Sleep is a habit. Good luck

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S.

answers from Dallas on

I think that's just a little too early to expect him to sleep through the night. Maybe around 4 mos if you are lucky. Talk to your dr about the cereal; there are a lot of studies out linking cereal in the bottle to the onset of diabetes. be careful. my boys were big boys, too, and honestly they woke a lot at night because they were just hungry, and I mean really really hungry. good luck.

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C.G.

answers from Dallas on

He's too little to sleep through the night. Being breastfed especially, he needs to eat often and be reminded that mommmy is there to comfort him. It's more realistic to expect him to sleep throught the night closer to the age of 1.

Cereal and all other solids should be avoided until 6 months of age, as recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics, WHO, Unicef, and every other major health organization. And allowing a baby to cry it out should be avoided at all costs, as studies have shown that it is both physically and emotionally strenuous on a baby.

http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html

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E.J.

answers from Dallas on

My son who is now about 6 months, started sleeping through the night at 2.5 months and we have not had a single night since then where he has woken up (knock on wood). He goes down 8-9pm and wakes around 6:30. He was breastfed except at night when my husband would give him a bottle of either breastmilk or formula. I think maybe this played a part in his sleeping all night, maybe he figured out that Mom wasn't feeding him at night and he associated Dad with nighttime bottle feedings (?) who knows. We never did co-sleeping so he started sleeping right away in the packnplay basinette in the living room and my husband who is up all night, would get up the 2-3 times and feed him and change diaper, and put him right back to bed. Then the wakeups would dwindle to 1-2 times, and then he would wake up only for the pacifier to be put back in and he would go back to sleep. This was with lights and TV on in the background also. When he discovered his fingers, he used them instead of the pacifier, so now when he wakes up at night he just puts them in and drifts back to sleep. Anyway, I'm not telling you all this to brag, but to give you an idea of what we did that worked for us. All babies wake up at night, becuase they are light sleepers by nature, its how they get themselves back to sleep that count. Does your son know that night time is for sleeping and daytime is for playing? Does he use a pacifier or has he found his thumb/fingers to do it himself? When he wakes do you get up and immediately attend to him or let him cry himself back to sleep? I doubt he's so hungry at night he has to eat. Feed him before bed and that should do it all night for him. I would try putting him in his own bed, next to yours, and letting him cry himself back to sleep even if it takes an hour to do so, so that way he gets use to the fact that no one is coming to his every cry. If he still wakes up after a week of that, then maybe he has an internal gas or heartburn that is bothering him. Check with the dr. Good luck!

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I followed the advice in "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child", by Mark Weissbluth and it worked like a charm in only a few days. He recommends a strict schedule and following the same routing before nap and bedtime. After only 3 days my 4 month old was taking 2 2-hour naps and going to bed at 6:30 pm and sleeping until 7 am. I can even put him in his crib drowsy, but awake and he'll play for a little while and then doze off. It is wonderful!! He says "sleep begets sleep" which seems to be true. If you can stand a little crying during the initial "training" so to speak you will be successful! My older son didn't sleep consistently throught the night until he was 7 months old...I wish I would have had this knowledge with him. Best of luck!

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J.H.

answers from Dallas on

Just nurse him until he falls back to sleep. I promise it won't last forever. My girls were both great sleepers, but my 8-month-old boy just started sleeping thru the night very recently. Try to relax and enjoy your quiet, private time with him, it ends way too soon. J.

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E.B.

answers from Dallas on

I have to agree, your baby is completely normal! Sorry, I know that's not what you want to hear. I think that 4 hours sounds pretty good. Don't worry, it will get better over time.

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