3 1/2 Month Old Needs to Be Swaddled to Sleep Through the Night!!!! Help!!

Updated on February 22, 2010
N.G. asks from Belmar, NJ
26 answers

My baby was sleeping through the night for the last few weeks. So i decided to switch her from the bassint in my mom to her own crib in her room. I also decided to stop swaddling her since she's outgrowing the swaddler & she can't stay swadlled forever, right? Well turns out that she's now waking up once or twice a night. I think its because shes not swaddled & she waskes herself up. I resort to nursing her because I feel bad & I also dont want her crying & waking up my other 2 children. i tried the pacifier, soothing & putting on music, but ulimately she spits out the paci & keeps crying till I go in and nurese her back to sleep. Any tips/ advice?? Anyone else out there had a baby that just had to be swaddled to sleep through?? How long did you do it for? My other 2 children were not addicted to swaddling, so this is tough for me. Not quite sure what to do??

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone who responded. I went right back to swaddling that same night & apperntly thats all she needed! She has been sleeping through the night again. I am more than happy to swaddle her until she starts to break free on her own. I don't know why I thought that I needed to break her from it!! Whatever works and does the trick, especially since I have other children to tend to as well! Thanks again for all the advise & input. Glad to hear others stories & experiences :-)

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K.S.

answers from Columbus on

I think it would be OK to swaddle her as long as she wants. My son is 7 & he "swaddles" himself. He rolls in his blankets until he is completely rolled up. My husband does a similar thing. So, sometimes they don't grow out of it. LOL

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E.K.

answers from New York on

As the mother of 5, I highly recommend swaddling. My baby who is now 16 months old was swaddled for close to 10 months. She still likes to be wrapped tight in her blankets sometimes. Since you are a mother of two already you probably know that this may just be a phase. Good luck!

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

What is wrong with swaddling? There are swaddle me's with velcro that make it a bit easier, and they have different sizes. I would keep swaddling her as much as she wants. It really is a comfort to them. She will let you know when she no longer needs it. For my son, it was when he got his arms consistently out, and he still slept through the night.

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

Both of my kids liked to be swaddled for a long time-my son 6 months and my daughter 5 months. There is nothing wrong with providing them that security especially at your daughter's age. They make swaddle blankets with velcro in larger sizes that you can find at BabiesRUS or ToysRUS. Some dept stores carry them too. The first few months are a huge adjustment and some babies need more comfort and security. All babies are different and your little one is proving that to you! She's telling you what she needs right now so go with it Mom! :)

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L.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Hello N.,
Please feel free to swaddle your baby. At her age it is all about the baby. You can't over do anything!!! You can't hold, love, swaddle or comfort her too much. It is simply impossible to spoil an infant!! I know others will disagree, but until the age of 18 months, a baby is hard to spoil. They truly need everything they ask for. Do not worry about how long your baby will need to be swaddled. After all, she spent 9 months being swaddled and loved while she was inside of you. If you think about it, it is a lot to ask of anyone to suddenly give up something that they enjoy and have had access to virtually all of their lives. Let her be an infant for as long as possible. They grow up too fast. Swaddle away : )

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J.B.

answers from New York on

We swaddled our son from day 1 until basically he could turn himself over in the swaddle (which we felt would be dangerous if we weren't around). If your daughter needs to be swaddled and you can identify what can help her to sleep, that is great! Eventually, she will grow out of the swaddling because she will control her reflexes and will want to be able to move around.

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K.M.

answers from Boston on

They tend to push their way out of swaddling by that age anyway, try a white noise machine?

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N.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think its okay to keep swaddling your baby. We swaddled our son until about 5 months. He had started to break out of his swaddle blanket (the one that velcros closed) in the middle of the night at that time. We continued to use the same blanket, but then left his arms out only. After a while, when we moved him to his crib, we stopped using the velcro swaddle blanket and started just wrapping a thin folded blanket under his arms and around his legs. He sleeps like this now and he's almost 10 months old. He's not quite swaddled, but still tucked securely. Maybe you can try unswaddling her more gradually.

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

Different sleepers have different needs for comfort. Even as adults, some people like to be well snuggled under heavy blankets. Others can't stand the pressure (I'm one of those). But I've known of several babies that still liked swaddling up to about a year. They just slept better.

I wouldn't do more than one change at a time with a baby. Move to own room OR gradually reduced swaddling, but not both. And for a baby that young, a white noise machine may be a better sound environment than soft music.

Be aware that little ones often switch sleep patterns several times in their first year or three due to any number of causes. Good luck.

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M.M.

answers from New York on

i am right there with you.My baby is going on 13 weeks now and is addicted to swaddling and if i take swaddler off she wakes herself because her arms flailing about scare her.I dont have an answer for you but wanted you to know someone is in the same boat and we live close by to each other which i thought was funny!! I hope you get an answer to your question because i need one too.

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A.B.

answers from New York on

My daughter would only sleep if she was swaddled until she learned how to roll over on her own and started sleeping on her belly. Have you tried the swaddle blankets that have velcro on the sides? They make them in bigger sizes for bigger babies so you can get one that is big enough for your baby.

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E.M.

answers from New York on

I am a first time mom to a 5 month old baby girl, and we swaddled her until she was 4 months. She also had an issue waking up when she wasn't swaddled, so I started not swaddling her for daytime naps and then only swaddling her at night. Then we phased it out completely. It seemed to work for us-but there are also larger size swaddles if your baby has outgrown the ones you have. Good luck!

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D.R.

answers from New York on

hi, i dont know what your solution is, all my kids were breastfed forever and i never was good at the sleep thing, i nursed them on demand, and didnt really sleep for 5 years! anyway, the only thing i wanted to mention.... we swaddled too, what a lifesaver. but i want to share, i was using one of those swaddlers with the "wings" that velcro closed across the chest. then one morning when my daughter was a little bigger and stronger, a few mos old, i walked in to find that she had wiggled her arms out the bottom of the wings, and then picked her arms up so that those wings were now velcro-closed across her neck, tight. i freaked out and thanked Gd for another lesson learned the easy way, threw the thing in the garbage and just used a receiving blanket, low down, after that. still not ideal because she could wiggle out and then she was in there with a blanket. switched to a sleepsack. not as good, but at least safe. i dont know if they make them different now, where they cant get their arms out the bottom. when i left one arm out of the swaddler, it helped since they didnt fight to get free. with my daughter and my third child, i swaddled with one arm out, rolled up a towel under one side so they were tilted, leaving the bottom arm free, so they were leaning on it a little and it didnt jerk, but they had their hand for figiting or sucking or whatever. that worked best for me. just be careful with those swaddlers.

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V.G.

answers from Portland on

Swaddling her won't hurt anything. Each baby is different and grows out of it on their own schedule. How nice that she still wants to be a "baby" all cute and swaddled! :)
Also, perhaps since she's now in her own room away from mommy she needs that extra comfort and security that swaddling provides.
Lucky you that she sleeps so long! :)

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

Go ahead and swaddle your baby! At 3 months old, she's still way too young to worry about weaning off of swaddling. If she is outgrowing the swaddler, go out and buy the next size up - I know BRU carries sizes preemie, small and medium. Plus, switching both the bedroom and the method of sleep at the same time is never a good idea - give your child a chance to adapt to one change before you spring another one on her.

My son LOVED to be swaddled, and he slept beautifully when he was! He picked his own time to be weaned off of swaddling when he was busting out of the medium-size swaddle at around 5 months old. All of my friends who swaddled their children had similar experiences, usually when between 5-7 months old. My pediatrician recommended weaning my son at 6 months if he hadn't started to reject the swaddle already, so that he would develop upper-body control, but for me, it never came to that. I suspect your daughter will also pick her own time to want to wean off of it, so reswaddle her and see if that helps her sleep a little better. You still have plenty of time to worry about it later.

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

To me it sounds like it's a few things - swaddling and hunger.

At 3.5 months, her food intake is likely a lot greater, and she may simply be getting hungry (since you commented that you need to nurse her back to sleep).

My daughter really didn't like being swaddled, but our son loved it (he still is our bad sleeper at 3.5 because he LOVES sucking-up body heat from us). I'd keep doing it with a blanket if that's what soothes her.

You're one of the lucky parents who has good sleepers (for the most part). Our kids were often up more then 2 times/night as infants. One of the things that got me through was learning to nurse while sleeping on my side. It made for a much quieter home and a much better night's sleep. Not sure if you do that, but it helped tremendously with our first. We had different challenges with our daughter that kept me from doing that.

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J.F.

answers from Fayetteville on

Both my kids liked being swaddled but with my daughter I was surprised how long she still needed it. She was 10 mths old - and big for her age - and still wouldn't sleep without being tightly swaddled. But she was strong enough that she would get out of it too often through the night and wake up crying for me to swaddle her back up. I never used the velcro or special wrap kind. I used regular light weight receiving blankets. I actually had to swaddle her twice with 2 blankets - tight! - to get her happy and comfortable and to keep her from getting out of them. lol In the summer I hardly put any clothes on her at night because I knew she would have the 2 layers of blankets wrapped around her. It was quite a sight watching me wrap up this big baby - but that's what she needed so I kept doing it until she was ready to go without. 3 mths is really too early I think to expect your baby to go without the swaddle. It's a security thing for them and makes them feel safe. And since you just moved her to a different room to sleep, that's a lot of change to expect her to do ok with. She needs the security of the swaddle more now because she is in a new environment she has to get used to.

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A.C.

answers from New York on

My daughter was swaddled until close to 4 months, which was when she started to break out of it in her sleep. I had some hospital blankets, which were the best for swaddling but I also had some homemade blankets that helped as well. By 4 months, she just broke out of them and not wanting to have loose blankets in the crib, I eventually removed the swaddling and kept her in just a sleepsack. She never complained during sleep again.

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A.P.

answers from New York on

Hi. Sorry to hear you are having sleeping issues. I hope this might help, as two of my three children had the same issue. There are "sleep positioners" available that help keep babies from rolling over at night into an unsafe position. I used mine religiously. They are usually lightweight and are adjustable to expand while your baby grows. I swaddled mine for as long as they felt they needed it and it wasn't long until they began kicking that little blanket into a ball at their feet all by themselves. :) The sleep positioner seemed to fill that need to feel so confined as they got just a bit older. It was one of the best purchases I made when my kids were infants. Here is a link to one that is almost identical to the one I used and by the same manufacturer- http://www.walmart.com/ip/The-First-Years-Airflow-Infant-....

I wish you luck and hope you find an answer that works for you soon :)
A.

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M.L.

answers from New York on

I would get a bigger blanket. ;-) Seriously. You're right - she can't be swaddled forever...and I'm sure she'll grow out of it. But for right now, you've got three kids to take care - cut yourself some slack!! My second baby had to be nursed when he woke up right up to about...13 months old. Then he weaned to a bottle. For a week. THEN he got the stomach flu, and decided bottles were sent from Hades, and now...I just go in with a paci IF he wakes up (which isn't every night now) and he goes right back down. (He's 14 months old.)

EVERY KID IS DIFFERENT. I'm SURE you know that. ;-) My daughter (now three) hated being swaddled, hated bottles, hated pacifiers. I nursed her until 12 months, when she decided bottles were cool...and she had a few bottles a day until she was 2. She didn't sleep through the night...until I hid all her bottles on her second birthday. If swaddling gets you some sleep at night? GO FOR IT. *grin* Good luck, mama!

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A.B.

answers from New York on

Hi N., I have a 4 month old baby and 2 other children (4,2 years old).
I still swaddle my 4 month old because of exactly same problems as you discribe. My opinion is: do not worry, it is O.K. You can buy a bigger size of "swaddle me" blanket and just continue for little longer. If you know she likes it and sleep better, why not ? The baby's brain keeps developing, so you notice later that she will not need it anymore.... I mean her arms/hands will be much better onder control. I used to swaddle my other son till 5 months old because otherwise he would not sleep at all, he was very restless. Swaddling rescued us! The bottom line is, just look at your baby, if she still want to be swaddled it is OK, she will show you later when she does not need it anymore. GOOD LUCK! A.

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

My baby is the same age, has been swaddled from day one, and we have no plans to stop! She sleeps wonderfully as long as she hasn't wriggled out of it. She still has jerky movements, so, like we did with our first baby, we'll wait till her movements are more fluid (or she wants to roll over often) to try stopping the swaddle. To test if they're ready to stop, swaddle with one arm out and see how it goes. If they wake up more often, they're not ready yet. Also, it doesn't matter if her legs are out. You're only swaddling for her arms, to keep them from jerking and hitting her during the night. You can leave her legs totally out!

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I.G.

answers from Seattle on

Have you ever heard the saying "If it's not broken don't fix it!". Go back to your old routine and see if that works. There is nothing wrong with keeping her swaddled for as long as she is comfortable... she will probably break out of the swaddle when she is old enough to turn around.
My oldest niece liked being swaddled until about 18 months, when my sister just could find a swaddle blanket that was big enough any more. Today she is 12 and still likes being tightly tucked in.

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T.Q.

answers from Albany on

Babies R Us carries a sleep sack/swaddle blanket. It is a sleep sack with a small blanket that swaddles the arms and mid section... once they don't need to be swaddled anymore, you can still use the sleep sack for warmth... they are simple to use, and hard to break free from, but you can gradually make it less tight, so she transitions out of swaddling more easily.

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E.C.

answers from New York on

Swaddle. You don't need a purchased swaddler. Just use a thin small blanket - over one arm and under opposite part of body. Fold other side of blanket over other arm - including shoulder with hand and side. Wrap bottom of blanket around legs and under body. All set. I swaddled until they were too strong for it; by then they were rolling over and sleeping on their stomachs - once they can roll over there is nothing you can do about it - I think everyone's kids do. Then they don't wake up, because they don't startle themselves with jerks and wacking themselves in the face (they are on their stomachs and so their hands just move in to the mattress.)

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A.D.

answers from New York on

Dear N., I do not know anything about swaddling as I am an older mom. Have you checked if baby is teething? Some do start before 4 months. There is also nothing wrong with nursing her as she is still very young.(she may be hungry) I think it is amazing that she has already slept through the night at all. Grandma Mary (mom of 5)

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