2Year Old Refusing to Poop....

Little ones truly have very little control in their lives, so the three areas they do, eating, sleeping and pottying, they become masters in ;) My guy was the same, he didn't poop in his pants but held it for days. This site helped tremendously, the "power incentive" had him poop trained, voluntarily, in a little over a day at 26 months:

http://www.rogerknapp.com/medical/pottytrainingrefusals.htm

Hang in there!

Here's a really helpful site that gives some great "readiness" checklists, plus the skinny on various approaches to training, their advantages and challenges. It's promising that your daughter is successful with peeing. But I wonder whether she is matured enough for success pooping yet. See if you can find your situation here: http://www.parentingscience.com/potty-training-tips.html

Ultimately, the child must have significant control, or else she's not trained (but Mommy is!). A number of factors are needed for potty training to succeed: the child must be able to notice and recognize the urge before it happens, she must be able to hold it till she gets to the potty (sphincter development), she must understand the value of training (how convenient it is, compared to diaper changes, and that it is an exciting new skill), and she must want to be trained (emotional readiness). It's extremely common for pee and poop training to happen at different times, because the sensations and effort required are quite different. Pooping often comes later, especially if there has been recent discomfort from constipation.

Sometimes rewards like toys or treats work in the short run if only motivation is lacking. But that introduces the very real possibility that rewards/bribes will need to escalate to keep 'em motivated, and that is a mistake parents regret later on. When a child is truly ready to succeed, that will be the reward in itself.

So, what I would suggest is that, as hard as this will be, you drop any "expectations" about training. Tell your daughter you are proud of how well she's growing up, and express your confidence that she will use the potty when she's ready.

And she will. Most kids WANT to make this developmental step when they're able, just as they want to walk and talk when they're able. Your daughter may need "space" to work it through for herself – to focus on her sensations, on cause and effect, and not on mommy's state of mind, or possible rewards. Or she may need a few more weeks or months.

Diapers, at least for pooping, are an acceptable alternative to repeated failures or withholding poop, which can become a serious problem. Some parents have reported success with cutting a hole in the diaper so the "feel" is still familiar, and having the child sit on the potty to poop. After a couple of successes, the hole can be made larger, or the diaper can be omitted. (I haven't tried that one, just passing it on.)

It's probably much too early in the process to consider your daughter a
"delayed" poop trainer, but if that eventually becomes the reality, here's a site that offers a process that has succeeded fairly quickly for a couple of moms I know: http://www.rogerknapp.com/medical/pottytrainingrefusals.htm

Good luck. She will get there!

ADDED:

KB beautifully outlines how to take gradual steps toward success. Small steps may seem slow, but allows the child to experience successes all along the way, and reduces any anxieties about using the potty.

Well, you could try to make the process of pooping in her underwear inconvenient for her. For example, have her "help" you clean up the mess and drag it on for as long as you can. The idea is that going in the potty is quicker and gets her back to playing sooner. Discuss what you are doing and why but in a matter-of-fact way and suggest that maybe next time she try the potty so that she can get back to playing faster. Note: I have not tried this, but it is what I would do if my kids regressed back to pooping in their underwear.

Also, make sure that she is comfortable on whatever potty she sits on. I'm guessing since she is peeing on the potty, that potty comfort itself is likely not an issue.

You could try to periodically sit her on the potty and see if she goes....like putting on a timer and having her try to go each time the timer goes off. But that won't guarantee that she won't hold it until she gets back in her underwear. Plus since poop is not as frequent as pee, it's kind of tough to time it with a timer.

Have her watch you go poop a few times and have her flush yours so she can see that it's normal and nothing bad happens if you poop in the potty.

For my child, I just relaxed on the pooping in the potty and let him tell me when he needed to poop and then I'd put on a pull-up, let him do his business, then switch back to underwear. Once he got the hang of poop training in his pull-up, I would let him go in the pull-up but he had to stay in the bathroom until he was done. The goal was to teach him that the bathroom is where we go poop. I'd give him a book or a toy. Then once we mastered that, we moved to the toilet. I initially was going to have him sit on the toilet in the pull-up, but he made the transition to the toilet directly so I skipped that last step. It took a while, but it was less stressful and we alleviated the issues that come from withholding. We were fortunate that he did not regress to peeing in the pull-up, but we also emphasized it was for poop only. Also, if he asked for a pull-up but couldn't go in say 10 minutes, we'd take it off and try again later.

Hi, Sunny's Mom:

Go to the Health Food Store in your area and see if they have
Hyland Vit. C. 5 mg tabs that melt in a child's mouth.
Try 1 or 2 tablets a day and see if that softens her stools.

Also check out for some digestive powder at www.enzymedica.com.
Good luck.
D.

Stewed prunes and milk for breakfast (use the prunes that are pitted). Keep us posted.

My son used to sneek upstairs and get on a pull up to poop. Peeing was not a problem. One day we were visiting family. He went all by himself and pooped on their potty and never looked back. I suggest a pull up and let her decide when she is ready.

Our ped suggested Miralax for hard stools. It is not a laxative but more of a moistener to make it easier and less painful.