2.5 Year Old Horrible Eater and Sleeper

Updated on December 24, 2016
M.K. asks from Sterling, VA
7 answers

Any other mothers or fathers out there with a horrible eater and sleeper? My son barely eats during the day, all he wants is milk for the most part and then I think when it comes time for bed he's hungry and can't sleep He was a great eater up until about 18 months, now at 29 months I make it one good meal in him a day. I can usually tell he's hungry because if I get him something he wants, like nuts or a fruit cup or something like that he will eat it, no problem. But he will not sit and eat a meal. A few bites of pizza or three quarters of a hotdog or like his max.
He's never been a great sleeper always waking at least once a night, but he was sick with a bad cold a couple weeks ago and ever since then he wakes up every hour to two hours asking for milk.
I was just wondering if any mothers or fathers experienced this and if they have any suggestions. I'm very exhausted, as I know he is.
Thank you!

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Mine were grazers at that age. I used to just give very healthy snacks. I didn't let them fill up before meal time, but if they didn't eat a full meal (very small meals at that age) - I had no problem giving them cereal before bed, or banana, or some cut up cheese, etc.

One thing I found was, if at the end of the day we got home and I gave them milk - that would fill them up and they wouldn't eat dinner. So instead, they could have a bit of dinner early (or last night's dinner which I kept on hand for just this purpose).

I really watched the milk intake at that age. My relative works with babies and children as a dietitian. She works with parents on how to change the habit of kids wanting milk over food. Before you give him milk, always offer him food. How much milk is he having? Keep track of this, and I'd make an appointment with your pediatrician.

5 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

You asked a similar question a few weeks ago, and I think you got a ton of good answers. You have slightly different details in this post, but I think the answers will be the same, namely:
1) talk to the pediatrician about possible sensory issues and to rule out any swallowing type problems.
2) stop filling him up with milk. He doesn't need it. And absolutely nothing during the night. It's terrible for his teeth, and all that dairy can increase mucus secretions when he's already battling a cold.
3) Let him eat nuts & fruit, and don't push hot dogs at all. Pizza can be okay if there's good stuff on it or if it's a treat.
4) No food at night, zero, after age 1. He will not starve. He will have a bad night (and so will you, and then he will eat during the day the next day.
5) If he won't sit, fine. I don't know what you expect when you say "a meal" but a 2.5 year old has a limited capacity and is just not going to get through the day on "3 squares" - he's going to eat 5-7 small mini-meals or snacks a day. He has a limited attention span and isn't going to sit in a booster for 30 minutes, or even 20. When he's done, he can get down from the table or (if you can) play with a few special "table toys" that are not disruptive. We always had special toys for restaurants too - small, portable, and only used then so that they were interesting and kept his attention.
6) Offer a variety of textures, colors, food types at each meal. If you are giving him a piece of meatloaf, a scoop of mashed potatoes and a pile of peas and you expect him to eat that and only that, you're going to be disappointed. Try the "ice cube tray" approach or a sectioned plate with more than 3 sections: nuts, fruit, yogurt, carrots, peas, cheese cubes, hummus for dipping little carrot sticks or pepper strips, peanut butter with some apple chunks for dunking, small whole grain crackers or mini rice cakes, cubes of meat loaf or shredded chicken, and so on. In time, you'll figure out what he likes and he'll have many, many opportunities to try new foods in very small and manageable quantities. There's some statistic that says a child often needs to try a new food somewhere around 20 times before he embraces it. So don't quit. Let him use a fork, a spoon, and occasional toothpick to learn to use utensils but also get some food in him without frustration.
7) When he's done, he's done. The food gets put away. Don't make it a battle. If he's hungry in an hour, bring out the same food - not with a negative or punishing sort of tone, but with the attitude that, "Oh, great, you're ready now, here you go! Yum, doesn't this look good?"
8) Make meal time fun, with laughter and stories, with you sitting there with him (and eating and saying "yum" about what you're eating)! Don't make it a battle ground
9) Get him a play kitchen and "cook" together. You can often find them used on Freecycle or Craigslist or at consignment/resale shops if you don't want to pay full price. Help him make a "grocery list" and then make a "grocery store" with play food you can find at any toy store.
10) No interaction at night. He needs to sleep, he needs to self-soothe. He absolutely cannot grow up thinking that eating at 3 AM is okay. He's not a newborn. He will not starve. He needs brain development.

Please get some help from a pediatrician or someone giving a support group for moms/dads so you can learn to take control of what you can control, and let go of what you cannot.

4 moms found this helpful

T.D.

answers from Springfield on

there is nothing wrong with him eating nuts and fruit in a cup... offer that and veggies as much as you can. some kids prefer to graze all day snacking constantly, while others like set meals. i would offer the nuts, the fruit, and veggies tha the likes. skip the hotdogs and pizza, they are not as nutritious as nuts and fruits and veggies... you can also offer crackers with peanut butter and jelly on them or peanut butter and jelly on bread.. cheeses and other finger foods are perfectly acceptable try to get him as full as possible before bed to have his hunger satisfied and hopefully get a better sleep.

3 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

did you not like the gazillion responses you got just a couple of weeks ago to the same question?
maybe if you quit turning eating into a battle of wills and terming him as 'horrible' he'll quit living down to your expectations.
stop giving him milk at night. especially when he has a cold. you created this, and he's too little to fix what you started.
khairete
S.

3 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

He sounds pretty normal to me.
His stomach is about the size of his fist - they can't fit much in there - so they snack.
What's wrong with a few nuts and a fruit cup?
Some nuts late in the day before bed is a great protein and it should hold him for awhile.
If he'll eat some pbj or some oatmeal (steel cut add a little honey- none of the sugary instant stuff) for supper - great!
His eating will pick up again for the next growth spurt.
No child will sit for long for a meal - that's why we never took our son to a restaurant till he was about 6 yrs old.
You might want to stop with the milk at night time - he only gets water at night - otherwise you're going to rot his teeth.
In the morning he can have a big sippy cup of milk.
(But if he's had a cold - sometimes dairy products can make kids have more mucus - so cut back until he's recovered.)
This really sounds pretty typical to me.
Just wait till he's a teen!
They just wolf food down and often don't even stop to chew.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

One of mine wanted to fill up on milk and then he felt too full to eat meals. I solved this by replacing milk with water almost entirely. Kids don't need milk - they can get the health benefits of dairy through yogurt and cheese. So, that is my first suggestion - cut out the milk and make him eat his dairy.

For meals, I never made my kids eat a certain amount at meals. It's just not a good long-term habit to form. However, my kids have to sit with us for the entire meal. If they are done eating, they can still sit in their chair and participate in dinner conversation. This is really important for my kid who is very busy with a shorter attention span. I found that he would sometimes start picking at his food again after he said he was full once I remind him that he needed to be polite and stay at the table.

For the waking at night - is it new with the cold, or has he always woken up for milk and night and it's just more often now? If this is totally new for him - sometime kids get reflux with bad colds, and milk is a natural antacid. You might want to talk to your pediatrician about this. If your ped thinks this is the case, he might recommend a child dose of something like mylanta, which would be a longer-lasting antacid as compared with milk, which might help him sleep through the night.

If milk at night is a long-standing habit, you simply need to refuse to give it to him. Switch over to water only. There will be a lot of crying for a few nights, but it will be worth it in the long run.

2 moms found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

My son liked to graze at this age. He would eat many small meals a day. He also didn't like to sit very long at that age...he just had too much energy. 1. Make sure you are not letting him fill up on milk and do not let him drink milk throughout the night. 2. Offer delicious foods cut up small during the day. Offer things you like (not things like hot dogs although they are fine once in a blue moon). Make him a mini burrito, homemade soup with bread and butter, pasta with meatballs, cut up some mellon or other fruit, etc. Feed him small amounts of what the adults are eating. Some kids are harder than others. Yes it is tiring but you will get through it. My son didn't sleep well and was a very picky eater. He seemed to have sensory issues that I never tested for (because at that time I didn't know it was a "thing"). Have your son tested if you and his pediatrician are concerned. He did not like to sit through a meal at that age. If your son is like mine he will outgrow all of this. My son is 12 now and he will sleep till 10am if we let him. He is hungry and excited to eat at mealtime and of course has no problem sitting at meals now, ha! My daughter was not picky and I always just fed her exactly what I was eating. It worked nicely with her...she loves to eat almost everything now. It did not work so well with my son but he's now pretty good about eating most things.

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