Right, first off, I know it's partly my husband and my fault that this is happening now, but we need help getting her to go back to sleep at 5am when she wakes up.
My daughter is small, tall but extrememly thin. Her Pedi was worried for a bit about her lack of weight gain, between 12-18 months she grew about 3 inches but didn't gain an ounce. He made some suggestions, and when we discovered that she would eat oatmeal at any time of the day, we went a bit nuts and loaded it up with butter, whole milk, and fed it it her whenever she asked. Well, three months and 2 pounds later, she now wakes up between 4:30 and 5:00 am and yells, "Mommy! Oatmeal!" Every. Single. Morning.
After she eats her oatmeal, she'll go back to sleep until 7:30 or so. And she sleeps through the night from about 8:30 to 5:30 most nights. I also just weaned her from the boob a couple days ago, and while that is going fine, she isn't really drinking milk from a cup yet.
I want another baby, but my husband wants to sleep. I need help Mamas! How do we get her to go back to sleep in the morning, so my husband can forget the sleepless nights and jump on board for #2?
I appreciate all the helpful replies, and have discussed with my husband about how we are going to work on breaking the "habit" of Taryn getting up so early.
I guess I'm not very good at posting requests, because I got a lot of nasty replies in regards to my situation, and although I could have refuted the various insults and insinuations, I didn't want to post my life story on here.
Just to clarify in general, yes, we have a live-in nanny who babysits while I am at work. She doesn't cook or clean, so maybe I used the wrong word, and we don't consider her any more of a "third parent" as you would someone who cared for you child in a center. Yes, Taryn eats "real food" she doesn't live on oatmeal, we just got her in the early morning habit with that particular food. Lastly, I am up at 5:30 am to go to work every day, so I don't worry about my lack of sleep, I don;t think I am a selfish parent, but when she has to go back down for a nap by 7:30, that to me means she isn't sleeping enough at night.
And that was my main concern. The #2 comment was tongue-in-cheek.
Thanks again to the truly helpful replies. I think I will stick to posting answers rather than requests in the future, because this is not at all what I expected.
I also have a 21 month old and he wakes up most mornings around 5:00-5:30 for a bottle then goes back to sleep. I wonder if this is a common behavior. I will be interested to see what others say.
D.
Oatmeal is a healthy food source, however...Protein will keep her satified longer. Try including at least 2-3 oz. of protein with her dinner, don't give her oatmeal until she's eaten most of it. Instead of 8:30 bedtime, move it up to 9:15-9:30. Prepare a snack for yourselves, something she likes without sugar, and nibble at it in front of her. At this age kids usually want what their parents have.
Next time she wakes up at 5:30, go into her room with the light OFF and tell her to go back to sleep. She'll object but after a few days she'll retrain her patterns.
If that sounds unkind, just think about all the kids out there who don't have a choice. They never get enough to eat and they learn to sleep hungry. Let her cry awhile if needed and within 3 days she'll stop.
My pediatrician promised me that if I stopped getting up with my 10 month old in the middle of the night for a bottle that after 3 nights it would stop. It was the hardest thing I ever did, listening to him cry for over 35 minutes, but the second night it was 20 minutes, the third night it was 10 minutes and the fourth night WE ALL SLEPT!!! She will make the adjustment and be just fine.
Been there..Fran
I'm sorry you received some backlash to your post. I actually found it quite amusing (your sarcasm, that is... not the fact that your daughter wakes up at 5). I can relate - my son, who is now 17 months, also went through a long stretch of waking at 5am. Out of desperation for more sleep, I starting giving him a sippy cup of milk or water to get him back to sleep, so then of course we had to figure out a way to break that habit.
I agree with the other mom who said to try putting him to bed earlier. That can be tough if you're working, but it really does help kids sleep longer in the morning. Seems backwards, but it's true. The book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth explains this.
As for the oatmeal demands, one way to approach it is to just ignore her and not go in the room. I know this is not easy at 5am when all you want to do is sleep, but eventually you will break the habit and everyone will be happier. Try waiting 20-30 minutes after she wakes up before going to her. Who knows, maybe she'll fall back asleep on her own. If not, after a few days of this, she just might have learned to sleep until 5:30, and so on. She doesn't really need to eat at 5am... it has just become a habit for her. Be patient - we eventually got our son to sleep until at least 6am every morning, but it took a long time to get there.
Oh, and as for cups, you might try the Nuby sippy cup. Overall I don't really like it because it tends to leak, but it's a good transition cup because the spout is soft like a bottle. Good luck!
My son is three and wakes up between 5 and 530 everyday (since he was born) to eat oatmeal. He does not go back to sleep. He's an early riser and up for the day.
My solution, which I don't like, is for me to go to bed earlier.
Fortunately, he hasn't adjusted to time springing forward so he's slept until 630 since then. Of course, now I'm sure I just jinxed myself and he'll be up bright and early tomorrow!
Good luck.
from what I've read and experienced your child is waking out of habit. When I was weaning my oldest I would only offer her a bottle of water when she woke. After a couple days she would not wake because she wasnt getting boob. My daughter is small too and the next one was huge?? Nevertheless if you child does get up early and demand the oatmeal you can hold off every day 15 mins or so and eventually she will want to eat later. Some childredn sleep 10 hours no matter when they are put to bed, my childrend dont. I have to put my middle one down right after the bath, jammies and off to bed she is 23 months. My 3 1/2 year old can stay up a bit later 8:30. She is ok after the bath and watch TV or play a game and them story time, teeth etc. and off to sleep and they both sleep til about 7. My middle one does wake up about 5:30 sometimes too and I tell her its still dark, you have to sleep a bit longer. She will scream and say "no daddy, no mommy" or whatever but we just lay her down and ask her if she want her puppy or two blankets something to make her respond and then we leave the room and she falls alseep. I dont know if there is an exact cure but this is what helped up. Now I have three. :-0 good luck.
Hi A.,
I would try putting her down to bed earlier, say around 6-7pm. The reason for an early wake up is usually too late a bedtime. I used the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth to sleep train my daughter with AMAZING results. Dr. Weissbluth is a terrific pediatrician who specializes in sleep. My daughter is 2 1/2 who goes to sleep between 6-7pm every night and sleeps until 6-6:30am. She hardly ever wakes up at night and goes back to sleep by herself with no fuss. Email me if you have any questions. Good luck!
L.
She is too young to go to bed so early. Is she eating "people" food on a regular basis? Like scrambled eggs for breakfast and toast and milk? Then again around lunch time protien and then finger foods with protein for dinner? Come on! She is almost 2. You are treating her like she is 8 months old. A good warm milk sippy cup before bed is ok. Mine didn't sleep through till they were both 2 and then it was smooth sailing. I think you need to be ready for the reality that kids wake early for a very long time. If you can make it to 6am you are doing really well. That's life as a parent.
Hi A.!
It has been my experience that children go through "adjusted" sleep patterns. Some patterns last longer than others. She's becoming more aware of her room, the sounds, etc...
BUT...5am sounds like a paperboy may be coming......Have you slept with her to check out her room and it's sounds? Maybe she's being awakened, and thinks "while I'm up, I may as well have some yummy Oatmeal!" I would investigate those sounds first, before you think she's waking up on her own.
Otherwise, if it's not a paperboy, it could just be a temporary change in her sleep pattern. If YOU want another baby, then you may want to be the one to get up with her during this phase, so your husband isn't "turned off" by these awakenings.
FYI: One of my boys had the same sleep pattern as your daughter....one day out of the blue BING 5am!!! Because of his age, I shifted his nap to earlier (if possible). He wasn't taking a nap until like 2ish, at that time. I found that it disrupted his nighttime sleep, so I needed to get him down earlier. Actually, it wasn't too much longer than this he actually did without naps around this age. So, your daughter could just be adjusting to "getting bigger"...
Good Luck!
:o) N.
I just responded to a night-waking question with the same suggestion I will offer to you. I LOVED the book "Sleeping Throught the Night" by Jodi A. Mindell. My 2 munchkins have awesome sleep habits thanks to this book and several of my friends have used the tips in in successfully, as well. I am a total crab without my rest so this book was a lifesaver!
Also, I can offer that a friend of mine had a similar situation as you. She weaned from breast-feeding at about 18months and her little girl was on the thin side, as well, and waking still at night to nurse. After she weaned her from nursing, she actually started eating more throughout the day. Her pediatrician told her that her daughter may have been filling up on the breastmilk and not actually taking in as many calories through her meals during the day.
Best wishes! Hope things turn around soon!
She is not yet two. It is normal for kids to wake up in the middle of the night.
Does she take a nap during the day? Lack of a nap can cause kids to get up earlier.
Is she getting enough protein in her diet? Enough complex carbohydrates? If she is not then she really is hungry and thus wakes up hungry.
If you deny her food when she is hungry then she'll start thinking you do not love her. She will not be able to comprehend the why behind it because it requires her to think abstractly. What you CAN do though is train her to be POLITE. Mommy! Oatmeal! Is NOT polite behavior. She needs to ask politely and calmly. "Mommy, oatmeal please?" (She's not yet two so she's not going to use a complete sentence.)
Other people are saying that you have a live in nanny. I don't see that anywhere so one person's comment must have made you remove that information (her comment was rude, and anyone refusing to help you out of jealousy is just petty and you likely don't want their help anyway).
What does the Nanny actually do? She is teaching your daughter manners? Putting her down for a nap? Teaching her how to use utensils? How to use a sippy cup or a regular cup? Is she feeding her enough through out the day? Is she getting a balanced diet? Does the Nanny allow to her eat sporadically through out the day - as in not force her to eat at specific times?
Children have growth cycles. If her body is growing she's going to be hungry all the time and eat like crazy. If her brain is growing she's not going to be hungry. It's healthier to eat five to six smaller meals through out the day than to eat three big ones.
Your daughter should know how to use a cup by now. Mine hated sippy cups because she liked getting a mouth full of milk which the sippy cup did not provide. So I switched to regular tumbler cups and made sure there was only a little bit of liquid in it and had her always drink it at the table. This worked very well.
You say you were breast feeding, but I see that you work full time. Were you pumping? Have you thought about pumping breast milk and giving that to her in a cup? It may be that she prefers the taste of breast milk. You can then slowly add whole milk to it until it's all whole milk.
Do not worry about number 2. There's no hurry. Pressuring your husband into it is a bad idea. He needs to be comfy with the idea. He has heard your want for another, and so it's in the back of his mind. Be patient.
Be patient with him. Be patient with your daughter.
My son (who is 9) does the same thing even today. He does not require as much sleep as the rest of us and he eat 4 healthy meals a day. I do not put him to bed until about 9 pm and he eats a sandwich just before bed. He is allowed to watch tv until 10 and has to go to sleep. He now gets up at 7am on his own and is ready for the day without being tired. Some kids can't do the bed at 8 or 8:30. On weekends he is allowed to stay up until 11 and sleeps in until 9. It is great!
M.
What time does she eat dinner? Consider feeding her later in the evening within 1.5 hours of her bedtime. Maybe even add a fiber source to help fill her tummy longer. Maybe even Oatmeal for dinner. That way she'll be more satisfied through the night. I have to admit though, I chuckled when you explained how she wakes up and yells "Mommy! Oatmeal!"... it's pretty darn cute. I understand though, how it is wearing on you. My daughter is 21 months old too 6/16/06... and she has surprised us too a couple of times with very early morning hunger... it could be a growth spurt, so just adjust her intake in the evening and maybe that will make a difference. Hope this helps!
I know it might sound strange but I would really concentrate on getting her onto some type of milk product. Even formula. I know that can be the "dirty" word these days but I really felt it gave my son the nutrition he needed until he was ready for whole milk. Which he seems to absolutely need. I breast fed but it was never enough and I had a decent flow. They are just growing so fast I think they really need it and it helps calm then down and gain weight. My son screamed until I gave him formula and despite the dirty looks from the nurses did PERFECTLY fine on it. Just get a good quality formula.
This probably wont be very helpful, but here it goes.
My son is going to be 4 in a couple months. He wakes up every day at 500 am. And he doesn't go back to sleep. Sometimes thats just a child's sleep cycle. He goes to be at 830 every day, and wakes up at 500 everyday, and yes he's hungry too. Every child is different and sometimes thats just how it goes. My son's has been like this since he was a year old. You get used to it.
