2 Year Old Very Shy

I too have a shy child. I was terribly shy growing up and still am to a certain extent. I also do not want my son to have to endure the internal anguish I went through in social situations. However, if this is his personality then I can't really change that. He is in preschool (he'll be 3 next month) and seems to have a lot of friends there. All of the kids are always excited to see him. However, he still hangs back with me at first and he's been going there for over a year. So I think it takes him a L. bit to "warm up" around people. Every evening I pick him up he's playing with the other kids and having fun. I am sure your daughter is the same way. I would defnitely get her around other kids. I think you and I had it so rough because our parents didn't do that for us. I wasn't really around other kids until I started kindergarden. Good luck! Try not to worry about it. She'll be just fine.

I was a shy child too and I certainly did not want that for my children. I too saw that both my girls had the "shy gene". To help them come out of their shell I tried to always give them the opportunity to speak for themselves. They frequently answered the phone, they always ordered for themselves in restaurants, I would coach them in being friendly to the office staff at doctors offices, the dentist etc. If we were at the food store I would give them $1 to buy tic tacks etc. It took a while for them to feel comfortable doing this. I remember one incident at a restaurant when my daughter wanted something. I told her she needed to speak up and tell the waitress. She spoke so quietly the waitress never heard her. Although I felt awful and was so tempted to speak for her I felt strongly she should do it herself. This I believe ended up being a life lesson for her and from then on she always spoke up. (She does not remember this incident).
Also, once they turned 5 ys old I enrolled them in a drama class. This I believed really helped shape their personalities while giving them a life long skill. Now I frequently hear how outgoing and friendly my girls are.

Best of luck!

I would leave it be. I was shy as a child, I remember walking to school looking at my feet so I wouldn't have to make eye contact with other people. I am not shy at all around my friends and I have been a sucessful salesperson. I am not uncomfortable in crowds, I can mingle and have a great time. I have learned how to get along with strangers.

I am an introvert, I get energy from being alone and watching things. My sister is the opposite she is a total extravert! We get along amazingly though :)

I think that schools spend a lot more time on self esteem now and are aware of bullying so she should be fine and not get teased like you did.

My daughter has always been 'shy.' She is now 7... in 2nd grade, and is still sort of 'shy' .. .and ever since Preschool, the Teacher's have commented on it.
BUT... I always tell them, I do not see it as a 'problem'... because my daughter is very mature/confident/self-assured/self-directed...and VERY socially cognizant and observant. SHE is not suffering. And she is no 'wimp'... she does speak her mind and stand-up for herself when there is wrong doing.
SO, I tell the Teachers, she is not a "problem." In tandem with that, she has always adjusted to classes/outings/school/peers/social situations very well. So I do NOT see it as a 'deficit.'
In fact, I am proud of my daughter, because, compared to other kids, she is very keenly aware of social appropriateness or in-appropriateness.
And, we ALWAYS have taught her, to be herself. Always. She is not a 'sheep' and she is a leader. Although shy. She knows people and situations very well... and always 'chooses' her friends well. She has good instincts.

So you see, there is nothing 'wrong' with being shy. It is just a social outlook... that adults/people have about it and toward that person.

My daughter, since a toddler, has been in classes etc. and Mommy groups. But I always go by my daughter's cues. I don't force her to be social or gregarious. She knows herself... and I trust that. And her.
Over time, she has become now at 7 years old, less 'shy.' So that's fine.
But she never lacks for friends or social invites and the Teacher's always have said, that my daughter is always the best-behaved in class and the one that has the best attention span and ability to comprehend directions.
So, 'shyness' is really a non-problem.
And, when others say my daughter is "shy"... I always say "yes, but she is herself. And she is not timid. There is a difference."
My "shy" daughter... is a great observer and will assess the situation/group first... and then she knows who/what kid is nice nor not... and why. She is just that way. That is her personality.
I would not think of trying to maker her, otherwise.

Its okay. Shyness is not a deficit.
Just teach her... that being 'shy' is nothing wrong. Otherwise she will always be self-conscious of it and herself... when there is no reason to be.
Teach her to be herself... and to be proud of it.
Many successful people, were shy children or are 'shy' adults. And it did not impede their 'success.'

all the best,
Susan

She is still very young so I would probably continue what you are doing but my neighbor has a son who is the same way and he is 6. A couple of years ago she discovered that if she is not there he is fine but if she is there he is clingy. She can't go to his soccer games anymore because he won't go out on the field and play. She walks him to his coach, says goodbye and has to leave. It's frustrating for her because she'd like to watch, but he won't play if she does. At birthday parties she has to leave or he will sit by her the whole time and beg to just go home. You might want to see if there are any "drop off" activities that she would be old enough for and see what happens. The first day or two might be rough, but then she might be fine. If you see that she can do it, it might give you and your daughter a L. more confidence to get her out on her own.

Good luck,
K.

You are doing a great job and everything you possibly can. The fact she is happy is the main thing. I waited until three for daycare for my daughter, figuring she didn't need it earlier, she was super outgoing already.
One thing I want to tell you, is that in her class, she has several classmates who are very shy and quiet. My daughter and everyone else likes them just fine. The teachers don't allow any cruelty (not that there is any) and are very good at catering to the different personalities. Don't rush the daycare, but don't worry about it either. She will be fine!

Shyness is a personality type. Like anything else, as she grows, teach her that she is fine, and anyone being cruel to anyone for any reason is being cruel, and not a person to be given any power to. Let her know shy is fabulous (when she's older, but this may not even come up, she may get more and more comfortable around people). Not everyone on earth can be an extrovert. As long as she doesn't suffer insecurity etc, she'll find her own path.

My son was the same way and still does show his shyness in certain situations. I find it important not to label him "shy" in front of him and downplay it when others use the term and reframe it as he's "feeling shy right now." Big distinction because I, myself, struggle with shyness and have found that at times I want to just give up trying to get out of my comfort zone with the excuse of "I'm just shy, I shouldn't even try." And if I feel that way as an adult I can imagine that children would adapt that label and use it as an excuse. A great book I found is The Shyness Breakthrough. It helped me come to terms with my own issues with shyness and how it might affect my son. I think you're on the right track just in realizing what's going on and seeing that she is slow to warm up to new things. My son has come a long way so don't worry too much at this point!