2 Year Old Refusing to Eat Last Bites

Updated on May 06, 2011
K.B. asks from Round Rock, TX
73 answers

I have a 2 year old son who has always been a very hearty (and never picky) eater. He is going to be a large boy as his father is 6'6. Recently he has started refusing to eat the last bite or two (literally) of his meals, and this is causing him to not get snacks during the day. I don't know what to do to convince him to eat those last 2 bites. for instance this morning he had yogurt for breakfast and finished all of that, and asked for more food, and I gave him the choice between cereal, banana, or a cereal bar. I give him these same choices every morning. He chose the bar and got down to less than an inch of it left, and decided he didn't want to eat anymore. He did this last night with enchiladas too, and yesterday lunch with a turkey and cheese roll up. This has been going on for 3-4 days. I really hate not being able to give him snacks because I snack during the day and he wants a bite of my food.

I have tried leaving him in his highchair till he eats the last bite, I have tried feeding him the last bite. I have explained to him that if he doesn't eat all of his food he doesn't get snack time. He gets so upset though when I (or any of the other 4 people living in the house) gets something to eat and won't share it with him. We have all told him while we are snacking that he doesn't get snack because he didn't finish his meals.

Does anyone have any suggestions for this behavior he has recently aquired?

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So What Happened?

I got alot of answers complaining that I am setting my son up for bad eating habits for the rest of his life. Alot of you are not reading in my post that I said he has always been a hearty eater and has just now decided to stop eating the last couple of bites. As soon as he gets down from his highchair he wants more food! I have tried cutting the meals to smaller portions and he is still doing the same thing. This is not an issue of being full.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Why do you want him to be a member of The Clean Plate Club? That's a recipe for disaster! Kids know when they are hungry and they stop eating when they are full. We should all be that smart!

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C.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

Im sorry but this really bothers me. This is partly why we have such an obese world today. Why does he have to finish every last bite? No one should ever be taught they have to "clean their plate". It's one thing if they only eat 1 or 2 bites of any food, but you wanting them to eat every last bite is not ok.

If it's getting to the end of eating and he's saying he's done then tell him he's 2 years old so he has to take 2 more bites and then he can be done. Let him learn when he feels full it's ok to stop eating, don't make him grow up feeling that he has to "overstuff" himself because he can't leave anything on his plate.

4 moms found this helpful

K.N.

answers from Austin on

Keep in mind, his stomach is the size of his fist.

I would stop trying to insist that he eat the entire amount. At 2-4 years, if a child eats most of it, its good enough for me.

4 moms found this helpful

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L.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Haven't read any of the responses, but my first reaction is seriously, what is the big deal? Two bites of food? You've got to be kidding me! A two-year-old's stomach is the size of a small clenched fist. If he's done, he's done. Don't punish him by not allowing him to snack later -- toddlers are snackers/grazers by nature! Eating habits change constantly in kids.

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L.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

I'm concerned. You are making food and eating too much of an issue with a child who is so young. Your son has a very small stomach right now and when he's eating everything but those last two bites, what he's really doing is following his natural eating appetite and stopping before he gets full. This is what grown women and men pay lots of money to Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig and nutritionists to learn how to do!!!

Let your son eat as much food as he needs to sustain himself, even if it is not everything on his plate. And don't withhold snacks from him just because he's not a member of the clean the plate club. Let him eat what is natural and right for his body, in the amounts that he needs to sustain himself. This is exactly what you should want him to do. How important are those last two bites really, compared to good health and maintaining a perfect healthy weight in the long run?

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V.B.

answers from Houston on

I wouldn't force him to eat anything he doesn't want to eat. There is absolutely no reason for him to have to eat those "last bites" in my mind. It sounds to me like he is eating plenty, so why make this a battle? He ate yogurt AND a cereal bar for breakfast and you think he should HAVE to eat the last inch to get a snack later? I'm lucky to get a few bites into my 2 year old. He literally did not eat more than 2 bites of dinner last night. Kids go through phases. Some days they eat like a horse and it seems you can't fill them up and other days, you wonder how they survive on so little food. Let him be! It's not like he isn't eating at all and all he wants to do is eat snacks. Let him be 2. You really are doing more harm than good by pushing the issue. You should never make him eat what he doesn't want to eat. It's one of the harder lessons I have had to learn as a parent, but truly, they will eath when they're hungry. If you really want to be a stickler about it, then save the "last bites" and make him eat that first before he can have his snack at snack time, but please don't make him eat more than he wants in one sitting. It just isn't healthy, especially in the long term. I hate to say it, but you have NO idea how big your son is going to turn out to be at 2 years old. Your hubby may be 6'6", but how big are you? How do you know he won't turn out to be your size? You can't make him have a man sized appetite at his age. I'm not trying to be harsh, but I really feel like you should ease up on this and just leave him alone about his eating habits.

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

Let it go. He stopped eating because he was full, and now it's a control issue. He doesn't need the last 2 bites, really. Your job, put healthy meals on his plate and offer healthy snacks between meals. His job, decide what and how much he eats. Be a good role model for healthly eating. Don't withold snacks as "punishment" for not eating his last 2 bites.

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H.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

I think it is important for him to know when he is full and to not be required to eat more. He might just be full. When I pour a bowl of cereal or put food on a plate for my kids I don't know how hungry they really are I am just guessing. Just because my child asks for a second bowl of cereal it doesn't mean they want a whole bowl full they might just need a few extra bites; so if they don't finish the bowl no big deal. I am not saying you are being bad by wanting to have him finish the last bites but he may just not need it. I don't think at two he is doing it to bug you. He may just not need it.

I think a big thing though is that you shouldn't be telling him if he doesn't eat all his food he doesn't get snack because you don't really know what his tummy really needs as far as quantity. and it is better to have smaller meals throughout the day then to be stuffed full in less amounts of meals.

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D.B.

answers from Boston on

Sounds to me like you have a great eater and that this is turning into a control issue. I agree that you will probably regret turning meal time into a battle ground. If the snacks you offer are relatively healthy, that's fine. Kids need to eat 5 times a day anyway, so trying to get him to cram everything into 3 meals doesn't make sense. The clean plate club has been abandoned by every leading authority.

When he's done eating, he's done. If he were asking for something and then wasting the whole thing, that would be a different issue. But he's is stopping when he is full, and that is good. If there is anything worth saving for later - like a few bites of yogurt or a piece of a bar, great. Otherwise, that's it. How many of us go to restaurants and don't finish the last bite? Sometimes we bring it home, sometimes it's a tiny morsel and not worth it.

You are turning this into a fight that doesn't have to be. You should be thrilled to have a child who eats good foods and tries a variety of things. Have you read the posts on this website - the majority are from parents going crazy because their child will eat nothing!

Your child is beginning to develop a bit of natural independence and that is a good thing and a normal stage of growth. Why not give him some control over what he eats? Continue to offer lots of choices and healthy alternatives, and enjoy this normal little boy!

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M..

answers from Cleveland on

He is obviousley full and that is why he stopped eating. Why force him to overeat? You WANT him to learn to stop eating when he is full or you will have an overweight child on your hands. Throw the last two bites in the garbage or give them to the dog!

My child is 2 and some days she barely eats, and the next day she is literally a human vacum cleaner and eats everything she see's. I never force her to eat on the days she doesn't want to. It all evens out in the end.

Also if I don't want my child to snack on something during the day, I don't even pull it out. I would never eat something in front of my child and tell her she can't have any. If she can't have it, neither do I. I also don't drink anything that she should not have, because she always wants a sip of my drink. I know they are just kids, but I think its rude to eat or drink something in front of my child and refuse her some if she asks.

Ease up a little on your son :) It sounds like he is healthy, so if he is full let him get up and be done with the meal. Is one or two bites really worth a battle? Good luck to you.

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H.H.

answers from Austin on

Why on earth would you not give him a snack if he doesn't finish his meal? His stomach is only so big. When he asks for a snack later, he's really hungry because most of the food is gone from his stomach. You're teaching him to eat even though he isn't full. That's one of the things that makes people grow up and become over weight, they never learn to stop eating when they are full, they just have to finish their plate.

I would suggest giving him a slightly smaller portion, especially of a second helping, and make sure he takes his time eating. And definitely give him a snack later, especially if everyone else in the house is snacking. Snacks are very important for little people because their stomachs are so small.

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D.G.

answers from Houston on

2 year olds are grazers! They are supposed to eat little healthy snacks here and there all day. They are not designed to eat large meals at just 3 sittings a day. It is healthy to eat until you are not hungry, not until you are so full or your plate is empty.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I agree with Heather about the clean your plate syndrome. My husand grew up in a house where he had to eat everything on his plate whether he liked it or not. If he didn't, he had to sit there until it was gone, sometimes for an hour. To this day, he struggles with his weight because he never learned to know when his system was telling him that he was full. He just learned to wolf down food without tasting it.

I grew up in a house with the opposite attitude. My weight is fine because I know to stop eating when I am full.

You are doing great by giving him choices and it sounds like he is well fed with lots of healthy choices! My concern is that this may become an issue of control and not healthy eating.

Keep offering, but when he's done and has left a bite or two, ask him if he's had enough to eat and let it go. If it's an issue about food waste (which I totally get), can you save the leftover bites and offer them as a snack?

Good luck, this is an issue that can really test your patience, isn't it?!

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G.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I don't quite understand what the big deal is if he doesn't eat the last bite or two of his meal. I would guess that your family insists on "cleaning the plate," but over-emphasizing this can lead to unhealthy eating habits and eventually becoming overweight if a child doesn't have a chance to learn to pay attention to his body's signals and stop eating when he is no longer hungry. I could totally understand your refusing to give him snacks if he were barely touching his meals, but it sounds like he is generally eating well. Personally, I think that I would just ignore his not eating the last bite. He is probably doing it because he knows that it gets a reaction from you, and if you stop reacting, he will lose interest.

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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

I don't mean to be rude but why in the world are you forcing him to eat every bite of food? He knows when he's full, that is a wonderful thing. You should be encouraging him to eat only when he's hungry. Honestly, I never make my kids eat anything unless it's to get them to try something new and even then it's a request, not a demand. They both eat very well, rarely waste food and are thin, healthy kids. Your boy is trying to tell you something, listen to him!

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S.K.

answers from Kansas City on

You are teaching your son to be a member of the clean your plate club. I take it that you are not overweight and have never struggled with weight loss. If you had, then you would know that it's unhealthy what you are trying to make him do. It's okay to finish what is on our plate if we didn't have much in the first place and we are really hungry. But we should ALWAYS stop eating when we are full.

I do like to see my children finish their plates. When they do, I know they have ate their veggies. But if I put a little more on their plates than they are really hungry for, then it's right for them to stop. Thin and healthy people do NOT belong to the clean your plate club.

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L.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

Why you are forcing the last two bites of food on him? More you force him into finishing the last two bites, less result you will get. Listen, my 2 2/2 used to eat everything, until recently. He eats a little bit here and there and thankfully, he loves milk and yogurt. Would you like to be forced to eat or drink any thing? The same answer you will give me is exactly the same answer your son is giving you. As long as he is mostly eating his meals, let him be. Finally, forcing kids into doing something is the worst thing you can do. His "behavior" is absolutely normal. Do not be so picky with the meals.

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

Most of us grew-up with parents who made us eat everything on our plates, and it has caused a lot of us to become obese because we learn that behavior. It takes the brain 20 minutes to recognize the stomach is full. We, Americans, eat our meals so quickly, we hardly ever take 20 minutes to slowly eat which results in us way over eating what we actually need and being overweight/obese.

If your son isn't hungry, don't force him. We have 2 kids. One has ALWAYS been a snacker. As a newborn, he wouldn't nurse for more than 10 minutes - ever. He's naturally a snacker, and the pediatrician said to embrace it as his preference because it will keep him from learning to over eat. Our daughter, on the other hand, is an eater. She loves food and clears the plate most days. But, some days, she's just not hungry, and we don't force the issue.

Babies don't know how to overeat - we teach them as adults when they are kids instead of just letting them listen to their bodies and stopping when they've had enough.

Good luck! It sounds like he's going through a transitional phase.

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M.K.

answers from Kansas City on

I don't understand why not eating the last two bites warrents no snacks, especially if he eats everything else. Honestly. The truth is, my parents were 'finish every last bite' forcers and I still feel the need to finish a meal today. I am now overweight and unable not to leave food on my plate, especially at a restaurant, even if I am stuffed to the gills half way through. I will usually make my two year old take one MORE bite before he can be done, but never make him eat everything if he is not hungry. Pick your battles, and don't punish with no snacks just because of the last one or two bites.

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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

I am not a believer in making children eat every last bite of their food. This can actually cause more harm than good. Children who are forced to eat every last bite grow up thinking they MUST eat everything on their plate and therefore they eat until they are STUFFED instead of until they are just satisfied. Stuffing yourself at every meal will lead to becoming over weight. My son will also be over 6 foot (I am tall, his daddy is tall, all of his uncles are over 6 foot, and our son has been in the 95% percentile for height since he was born). Even though our son has grown fast already and has a hearty appetite I have notice variations in his eating habits. At times I just can't feed him enough, then other times he just won't finish his food. This has to do with whether he is going through a growth spurt. It is quite possible your son just is not going through a growth spurt right now and his body does not require all this food. Nothing wrong with that and there is nothing wrong with him not finishing it.
I don't think a child should be punished for not finishing all the food on their plate, especially with the punishment of not getting snacks. A growing child NEEDS snacks throughout the day, as does a healthy adult. We have this misconception that we should only eat three large meals a day when in reality we should be eating three smaller meals a day (with breakfast being the biggest and dinner being the smallest) with healthy snacks a day. That actually means we should be eating at least 5 meals a day. Your son needs those daily snacks to grow healthily and to train his brain and body NOT to eat 3 huge meals a day where it is harder for the body to burn off all those calories all at once.
My suggestion to you is not to make him finish all his food and to continue letting him have healthy snacks throughout the day. The only time snacks MIGHT be withheld is when your son will not eat some of his vegetables. Again, I don't believe in making them finish them if they REALLY hate them... but a few bites and swallows is a must.

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I.G.

answers from Seattle on

Children as opposed to many adults, stop eating when they are full. This is a skill you should try to foster instead of trying to squash it. Good for him to know when he's had enough!

One of the things you could revisit is what actual portion sizes for a two year old are. I believe it's more half of a cereal bar, maybe a third of a banana - a good rule of thumb is 1/2 to 2/3 of an adult serving.

Good luck!

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J.N.

answers from Lubbock on

This is funny to me. My mother taught me that a lady never eats all the food on her plate no matter how hungry she is - always leave a bite or two.

Somehow I forgot my upbringing and had to go to Weight Watchers where people tried to get over the conditioning they had as children to eat every bite on their plate. The healthiest thing is to eat when you are hungry. This usually involves grazing, or eating smaller amounts more frequently.

Preschoolers generally are excellent at listening to his or her body and eating the appropriate amount of food. If it bothers you, just save the food. When your child is hungry, they must eat that food first before a snack. That way, your child is not just manipulating for the yummiest food, but can still stay attuned to his bodies needs.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

You can either try giving him smaller portions, or make sure you like what ever he's eating and you finish the last 2 bites. (Every mother does it. They won't always admit to it, but they do.) If you have a dog, the last 2 bites will never go to waste. As he grows his eating patterns will shift with growth spurts, his moods and stress levels (some eat more when stressed, others eat less). Make sure what he eats is not junk, and a healthy snack now and then is fine. Life's too short to quibble over 2 bites.

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M.V.

answers from Houston on

Please, please do not force him to eat the last two bites! Children are able to tell when they are full and stop eating. If you start forcing him, then he will lose the ability to tell when he is full and will eat beyond the point of being full. Let him be. He just isn't hungry any more to finish those last bites. Let him have a healthy snack later on. Actually, the Dr. Sears websites explains that small children should be allowed healthy snacks throughout the day. Their little tummies cannot hold much at one sitting.

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

It is supposed to be healthy to NOT finish all the food on your plate, and statistics show that people who are not overweight frequently leave food on their plate. Forcing them to finish all their food can lead to obesity. Let him leave two bites. It's good.

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M.G.

answers from Atlanta on

Personally I teach my children to stop eating when they are full. I don't think that it is necessary to eat beyond that point. That may very well set them up for overeating later in life. In America we are taught//drilled to clean our plates. Look at the results in America and ask yourself -- do I really want to teach -- clean you plate -- full or not??? Best of luck to you!!! :)

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A.M.

answers from Seattle on

Why can't he have snacks if he does not finish a meal, so long as they are healthy ones. I always want my children to stop eating if they are not hungry now. By the same token I want them to snack on healthy things if they ARE hungry. Not learning to listen to your body is a big cause of obesity and so on here in the states. If he is not hungry any more enough to finish he should not have to. They usually have a growth spurt around 2 and then they slow down growing some for a bit often. Also, sometimes their needs as they are more active become more often eating but in smaller amounts.

I have found 2 year olds need to graze, I just make sure all of what they graze on is healthy! Have a bowl of fruit, some cut up protein items and veggies and so on out where he can grab them as needed and give him smaller portions at meals. He will be fine!

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L.M.

answers from Houston on

I don't know why he's refusing to eat the last couple of bites. But, and I don't want to sound harsh to you, but you are setting up a very powerful, bad example of "you must clean your plate" mentality that could follow him the rest of his life. Many people are overweight today because they were taught that mentality as a child and feel they must "clean their plate" or they are being wasteful.

Please discontinue this practice and give him his snack time back. If you feel he MUST finish what he left behind, then wrap up what was left over and tell him he has to eat that when he decides he is hungry again. My mom did that to my brother and I've done it with my son.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

maybe he's just full. His stomach is only as big as his fist.
Has restricting his snacks done anything to get him to eat the last bite? It doesn't sound like it.
He's found something that he knows makes you go off, he's controlling you through this last bite thing. If you stop caring about it he's lost control. Eating is one area a toddler has complete control over himself.
Slack off of the "eating the last bite" bit , he might actually start eating it.

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S.D.

answers from Austin on

Please do not force him to finish meals. That is how people develop eating problems and become overweight. If he's done, he's done and it's good that he stops. BTW, it sounds like he's a GREAT eater. You are lucky. There's no way a 2 year old can master "take only what you will eat" - that's a lesson for an older age; besides you're the one controlling the portions. If you are concerned about waste, then you should start with smaller portions. Just be glad he isn't demanding carrots with jelly or insisting that none of his food ever touches. Even if he's doing it from a control standpoint or just for fun, this is not something to punish him for.

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J.G.

answers from San Antonio on

A lot of answers in 25 minutes. I figured you'd get a lot of 'don't force him to eat' responses. I totally know what you're saying though. My 2 yr 2mo old son does similar things. He rarely finishes his whole meal and I don't over-fill his plate. He's real skinny though. We need him to eat more, or at least finish the protein on his plate.

I think at this age, they can't look all the way to snack-time as a punishment. We have to tell our son that he can't have dessert if he doesn't finish his food. That's a "NOW" thing instead of a 'in two hours when we all snack, you won't be able to." thing. Last night he didn't eat much of dinner, so he didn't get dessert.

I bet your son is probably actually hungry at snack time, hence he's pretty upset when he doesn't get his snack. I'd try taking away something different. Maybe he only gets water and milk if he doesn't finish his food. Juice could be a treat. Or do like we do and reward our 'good eater' with a sweet treat after dinner (a lolipop, cookie, orange, grapes).

I know I probably won't have the popular answer. Everyone seems to be worried about obesity. You know if you're giving your son too much food or not enough. A couple bites of granola bar is nothing I'd argue with my son about since he ate almost the whole thing. As long as my son eats 75% of his plate, I'm happy. It's not worth my effort or worry to make him eat it all.

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

Why is it so important for you to have him finish the last 2 bites? If he is full, then he should stop eating and not have to finish eating every last morsel. You can teach him to get smaller servings of food if you are worried about wasting food. By forcing him to eat and then punishing him by holding out and not giving him his snacks, this will only lead to eating problems later in life. He should learn that food is fun and an enjoyable experience and not come to dread mealtime. I have a nephew who hates mealtime because his mom forces him to eat. I know she is worried about him not eating enough but she is doing more damage than good. Let the kids figure out what their little bodies can handle and go with that.

FYI: Eating patterns / behaviors do keep changing as kids grow older. My son would eat anything and everything until he was about 2 years old. He seemed to have lost interest in from 2 to 3. During that time he only gained a pound and grew a few inches taller so he seemed really thin. We would encourage him to keep trying different foods but after a few bites he would be done and we would have to be okay with that. He is now 3 1/2 and now is interested in eating again. His appetite has grown some but not so much that he eats all his food. In fact, his one year old sister usually outeats him.

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L.T.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I can't tell you why your son is doing this, but I can tell you that between the ages of 2 and 5 my kids had inconsistent eating patterns with some skipped meals (their choice) and nibbling throughout the day. While I understand how frustrating it is to see that food left on the plate, I think at age 2 you are fighting a losing battle for a couple of reasons. I don't think he is going to make the connection between "if I don't finish my meal then I won't get a snack". To him the two aren't related and there isn't an immediate cause and effect timing. He may also want to exert some power and gain control over his environment. And as others have said, him recognizing when he is full is truly a blessing that will serve in well in years to come. When I seemed to be throwing a lot of food away I started giving my kids smaller servings - half of a cereal bar instead of a whole one, a handful of cereal instead of a larger portion, etc. If they were still hungry I'd give them more. Now that they are a little older (they turn 5 and 6 this summer) if they don't finish a meal they don't get dessert or snacks. I wrap up their plates, put them in the fridge and then they can finish their meal as a snack. Typcially none of it gets wasted and I am allowing them to listen to what their body is telling them. For the most part it works well for us.

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L.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

If he is healthy and not in need of gaining weight, then why fight the battle. Is it really that big of a deal if he doesn't eat the last bite?

If you think it is a behavior thing or just stubbornness, try giving him smaller portions and see if he still does it. If you give him half the amount you used to, and he still saves a bite, then he is doing it to piss you off, lol.

Another option is to keep storage containers in the fridge for his leftovers, let him put what he doesn't want in the container, and when he is ready for a snack, have him eat that before you give him something else.

But if he is just done eating....then why force him to eat? Sounds pretty normal to me, I went through it with two of them.

I do not cater to anyone in the house, when I cook, I cook for the family, and if you don't like it or don't finish it, then I will either save it for later, or throw it away and they get nothing else until the next meal time.

Good luck!

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L.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Why would you withold his snack if he doesn't finish his meal? Maybe he is just finished. Two year olds are just starting to figure out what they like and don't like and there preferences will change everyday. Also, they are at the point where their growth has somewhat slowed down. I think let him eat what he wants when he wants it. It is obvious that he is getting enough nutrition that as long as you are not giving him candy for a snack, you should be fine.

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C.M.

answers from Chicago on

I would say choose your battles...this definitely is not a battle. This is a critical time where you are teaching him food habits that he will have with him for the rest of his life. It sounds like he's eating well and stopping when he's full, as he should. Making this an issue now will only make him have issues with food later on. So many of us struggle with weight issues because we grew up in households where you couldn't leave the table until your plate was clean. Being forced to finish or clean the plate is not healthy and I'm not sure why it bothers you so much unless you had the same philosophy forced upon you as a child. If so, now is a good opportunity to break free from that and save your son from having a love/hate relationship with food that so many of us have.

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C.P.

answers from Houston on

How about rather than trying to force him to clean his plate if you let his hunger decide how much he eats? I'm very proud of the fact that my children don't eat when they aren't hungry. How many people can say that?

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S.L.

answers from Austin on

I think he is trying to assert his independence, which is so normal for that age. I don't believe in making children eat. I personally would hate to be forced to eat the last bite of my food. Instead of denying snacks based on meals, maybe try to have healthy snacks like carrot sticks, apples, grapes... for him to eat. That way he is allowed to feel power over his eating and still gets healthy food. At two, you really have to pick your battles. It is normal and good for them to want to control what goes into their own bodies.

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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

This is what they do at this age. They are learning to assert themselves in ways that are available to them- food, potty, etc are all things they will take control over as they mature.
Instead of trying to wrestle him for control over his food, you'll want to just ignore those last few bites- and give him his snacks anyway. There is no good reason to punish him for not eating those last few bites anyway- that can lead to eating disorders. Snacks are very different from meals, and are as necessary for a growing child's diet. You are risking having him obsess over his food- and you don't want that.
Maybe cut the size of his portions down slightly just to avoid waste, but let him choose how much he eats. :-)

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K.B.

answers from Columbus on

I know this is wierd, but I'm 30 years old and have never eaten the last bite or two of my food. I don't know why, I just never do. My four year old does the same thing, while my two year old eats every last bite of everything. I can't explain why, but I don't think it's really that big of a deal... just a wierd habbit! My husband thinks it's so bizarre but he's used to it now :)

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

why cant he decide when he is full and if he dosent want those last bites. i am hearing that studies show if you make your kid finish every last bite and not listen to there full instint they will most likely become obesse. instead of punishing him how about you go with he is full and dosent have to eat those last bites. good luck. ( when i reread this it sounds harsh. i dont mean to sound that way at all :D )

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L.W.

answers from Boston on

I laughed when I read this. 99% of the time I do not eat the last bite on my plate either, unless it's REALLY good or I would want seconds. I don't know why, but I just don't. I think it's that I am content with the amount I have eaten.

I chalk it up to how some people don't like their food to touch. If it's one bite I wouldn't worry. I relate to your concern, my son leaves half a granola bar it foes in a zip lock and he gets it the next time he wants a snack. I hate the way children waste food, but sometimes a bite is just a bite.
Good luck

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

K.,

I’m not much on giving a lot of food choices in the home. When this is done before you know it your house is like a restaurant and you are short order cook.

I don’t think it is a big deal if your two year old leaves a few bites. As for the “cereal bar” incident and if he leaves a lot of food on his plate, I suggest you cover the plate and cup of milk or juice, wrap up the cereal bar and when it is snack time, that’s what he gets.

PS…Sound like you family does a lot of snacking….perhaps cutting out some of the snacks between meals would help.
Blessings.....

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B.K.

answers from Austin on

I had a pediatrician once tell me. Your little ones tummies are the size of your fist ( not very big) so they get full way faster. Don't stress over the last bite. Refusing snacks because not eating the last bite is crazy to me. There are lots of times I am so full that eating that last bite is not going to happen. It sounds like your little one is getting plenty to eat. Of course, your little is going to ask for a bite of your snack that what little kids do, they like little snacks throughout the day. I would throw a fit to if everyone got a snack but me. Remember, your little ones tummy is tiny they can only put so much food in there at one time!!!

Updated

I had a pediatrician once tell me. Your little ones tummies are the size of your fist ( not very big) so they get full way faster. Don't stress over the last bite. Refusing snacks because not eating the last bite is crazy to me. There are lots of times I am so full that eating that last bite is not going to happen. It sounds like your little one is getting plenty to eat. Of course, your little is going to ask for a bite of your snack that what little kids do, they like little snacks throughout the day. I would throw a fit to if everyone got a snack but me. Remember, your little ones tummy is tiny they can only put so much food in there at one time!!!

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A.P.

answers from Austin on

Why does he have to finish the last bite? Children at that age know when they had enough to eat, they instinctively eat until they had enough. Don't force him to eat. May I suggest reading this book "Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense" by Ellen Satter.

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P.B.

answers from Miami on

Don't make an issue of it. Let him eat as much or as little as he likes as long as what he eats is nutritionally balanced. No child will starve themselves if food is available and pressure to "clear the plate" can lead to obesity later. Allow snacks as long as its fruit or raw vegetables such as carrot or cucumber. And just love him!
I'm not an "expert" but after 3 children, 5 grandchildren, 48 foster children and 45 yrs as a teacher, I have been around children a bit. Good luck.

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A.S.

answers from Odessa on

You have quite a few responses so forgive me if i'm repeating.Kids at the age of two slow their eating habits. They will not starve themselves; they are much more interested in playing than eating. With my son I sit him down for the meal and he eats until he wants to get up. Then the plate is left there for him and he can not have any snacks til he eats whats on his plate. He will snack on it for a while. Myabe this is something to try. Something that I had to teach my grandpa is that kids won't always finish their plates and the generations are completely different- thier generation had to eat everything on their plate- our generation not so much. I explained to him that the highest percentage of obesity is from the generation of eat everything on your plate...

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N.K.

answers from Houston on

K.,
DO NOT force him the last bite.. and always give snacks. At this age kids actually eat the way we are suppose to be eating. Our body is suppose to shut off when we are full and eat snacks during the day. The "clean your plate club" mentality that we grew up with is the reason for obese america. Our bodies are designed at birth to stop eating when full... and to NOTeat things just because they are left over and we don't want to waste. Let him be the one to listen to his body.. he knows it better then you. ALWAYS give snacks.. healthy ones. This is VERY important to his growth. Don't try to make him do what we did.

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H.S.

answers from Cleveland on

While I haven't gotten to that point yet (my son is 9-months-old and still eats absolutely EVERYTHING ... and would keep eating probably as long as I would feed him LOL), I have always heard that you should stay away from the "clean plate" syndrome. I would say that as long as he has eaten most of his meal that should be fine. Babies and children are very good about regulating their appetite and as long as he has gotten it all down but a bite or two I don't think it should be a problem. :-) I think it would be a different story if he refused to eat any of his meal at all and then demanded snacks. Good luck to you!

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G.G.

answers from Austin on

I would never force him to eat. Sounds like he's a great eater and he's listening to his body when he's full. If you force him to eat, it will create very bad eating habits for life. I personally wouldn't deny him snack. It's basically a punishment for listening to his body. Feed him when he tells you he's hungry. If you are worried about food being wasted, save those last two bites and give those to him when he feels hungry again. Then, if he needs another snack, you can give him something in addition. I know my grandmother always forced us to finish the food on our plate and I really struggle as an adult with this. I never listen to my body like I should, I can't help but stuff myself at times. Fortunately, I don't have a weight problem but I see my metabolism slowing as I get older. It's something that is so hard for me to control. Don't force it!

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J.K.

answers from Austin on

Why are you forcing him to eat the "last bite?" If he is full , he should not have to eat every bite on his plate. Do you eat every bite? My own mother forced us to eat every bite and it caused terrible fights for years with my brother. It made meal time very un-pleasant. Eating should not be a place of control. You should offer healthy food to your children and let them eat what they want. Try to demonstrate portion control yourself, but do not force the idea of eating "the last bite" onto your children. My own children do not have any eating problems and disorders and I think this is because I took such a casual approach to meals. This is my opionion. J.

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C.U.

answers from Houston on

Please do not force him to eat those last two bites. Like the other posters have stated, he knows when he is full. Too insist that he eat the last two bites, is going to change his eating habits. He sounds like a healthy eater, and does not need to over eat. I understand the frustration in having the left over food. I have to remind myself not to make my kids clean their plates, or to reduce their portions if they are consistently leaving food on their plates. Don't worry about those percentile charts. I know that was making me worry, as my kids seem to be on the lower ends of the weight percentiles. I have to remind myself that it's actually healthy for them to be on the lower weight percentiles, because the more obese children are skewing those charts (at least in the last decade or so). If your pediatrician is not concerned about his appetite, then you shouldn't be either. I know, it's hard. Many of us were raised to think that we have to eat everything on our plate, and now many of us are dealing with weight management issues. Please let him eat until he is full, and not insist on him finishing every bite. Keep the left overs for his next snack.

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

I am not sure why you are upset by his behavior. Children are much better than adults at telling us when they are hungry and when they are full. If he doesn't want to finish his meal, he might not need it. Though he may need that snack later in the day. Having a policy that he must finish his meal to get a snack later seems a bit counter intuitive. Maybe you should re-think your food rules.

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W.M.

answers from Sherman on

Hi K., I think your little boy is probably full when he refuses to eat any more, so he shouldn't be forced to eat more & by the time you eat snacks he is hungry again. Don't force him to eat every bite, that might cause him to have weight problems later on. He's just a little guy & doesn't understand all that about eating every single bite. Good luck.

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H.H.

answers from Hartford on

I dont understand why he needs to eat the last two bites and why he is not getting snacks? Maybe I am reading this all wrong. but he is two and he will eat what he is able to eat and if he is full then he will stop eating. you should not use food as rewards or punishments that will lead to a variety of food issues in the future (please ask a professional or dr. for more info). Also kids are just like us they have wants/needs ect. there are times I want more rice and less chicken and if it is a good healthy request there is nothing wrong w/ letting them get more of what they want or need. there are some kids that only eat hot dogs ect.. I am not suggesting that you give in and become a cook to what they want at the drop of a hat I am just saying if it is part of the meal than that is okay. also kids around 2 also get very picky and it is not really recommended to really start food battles w/ them meaning that kids will exhibt controll over things you cant make them do...like sleep, eat, adn use the bathroom and if you start a battle w/ them they usually will stick to their guns and not give in. If you want more from me just let me know as this was a very basic answer. i hope this does help though

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A.H.

answers from Austin on

There was a great article in Parenting magazine about this very thing. My son at 2 yrs old started eating less as well. What I have learned from reading different articles is that babies and toddlers will eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. Forcing a child to finish his plate actually leads to obesity later in life. Kids also eat correctly by having 3 meals a day and snacking. You have to remember that their tummies are small and cannot hold too much food. That is why the snacks are important. You also have to remember that children go through growth spurts where they will eat a lot and when they stop growing at such a fast rate their eating tapers off. As long as he is eating a balanced meal, let him decide when he is full and give him has snacks during the day.

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T.P.

answers from Houston on

My response is to not make a bid deal of it. I think a child's eating habits and tastes change from time to time. I am a strong believer in not punishing or rewarding with food.

My daughter was always in the 100% percentile in height/weight categories, equivallently. She is now 12 and prefers healthy food to junk (with the exception of chips!)

Also, my 2 year old was almost always jealous when anyone had ANYTHING she didnt' have!

I think you will have all of your right answers - don't doubt yourself and relax!

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S.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

Give him a break! He's 2. Choose your battles wisely. I'd skip this one. If you are really anal about this it will become a power struggle. Try serving him a bit less. Then everyone is happy! Been there done that!

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J.T.

answers from College Station on

I have not read your answers, but you really are setting him up for bad eating habits by being a member of the clean plate club.

He is only 2 and does not understand the whole cause and effect of 3 hours ago I didn't eat x so now I can't have y. 2 yo think in the here and now and not 3 hours ago or 3 hours from now. Feed him when he is hungry, take the food away when he says he is done. If he is not asking for more food immediately after refusing to eat what he has, then he is done and you have nothing to worry about. But, if he is asking for more food when there is still food there, that is a whole other kettle of fish.

Remember, 2 yo have small bellies so they have to eat many small meals.

Good Luck

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K.K.

answers from Cleveland on

I see all the criticism of the clean your plate club. That is not what you are describing. In the clean your plate days though, children were not as obese. It is perfectly reasonable to want your child to take what they ask for and eat it. What I do is if a child has food that they don't want to finish, that's fine but it will be the next thing you eat. So an hour or two later, when you're hungry, those last two bites are what you eat. We have 8 children and can't deal with picky eaters or volumes of wasted food. It is good to teach children to not waste food and to be grateful for the food they have, especially if they are blessed to have it in ample supply. Don't make a big deal out of it- just make sure he knows the next thing he eats will be that. Often children won't want to finish one thing but then want something else. To give in to that is indulging and setting up all kinds of negative qualities. I may get blasted for this post, but I get nothing but compliments on how well behaved, appreciative and good mannered our children are. 5 of the 8 are 5 and under.

B.A.

answers from Austin on

Here are some ideas and more can be found at the link below:
http://blogs.goddardsystems.com/Cedar-Park-TX/2009/12/26/...

* Offer new foods on multiple occasions. Many children need to try a new food up to a dozen times before they like it.
* Set a good example and try new foods yourself.
* Encourage healthy food portions. Never insist that children “clean their plates.” Rewarding a clean plate may lead to a distorted idea of food, such as ignoring feeling full or eating for a reward.

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K.G.

answers from Sarasota on

2 yr olds are funny like that. my almost 2.5 yr old started doing this a while back and yes before this she used to eat everything and more! I would not fret over it. Many times at this age, their metabolism changes a bit and they need smaller amounts more frequently. If you can give your son healthy snacks like fresh fruit, cheerios, fresh veggies (cooked or no), cheese, etc. there is no reason not to give him snacks in between meals and let your son eat smaller amounts during regular meal time.

Hope this helps.

K.

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G.K.

answers from Austin on

If his eating that last bite or two is so crucial for your peace of mind, use the leftover bites as his snack. I have to say, though, if he was still hungry, he'd eat everything. It could be that his metabolism is fluctuating or the warmer weather may be a factor. You could also try serving him smaller portions & see what happens. Believe me, if he's hungry, he'll eat!

M.B.

answers from Beaumont on

I have never eaten all of my food. I deliberately leave the last bite or two also and I have never been overweight. I am 52 yrs old and weigh 120lbs.
It is awful to force kids to eat food. I do not know what all this is about snacking. That sounds unhealthy too. Making kids eat all their food and them giving them snacks??? Ughhh. We were given healthy meals at dinner time. Fresh cooked food in moderate portions. Then later in the evening while watching TV my mom would cut up fruit, apples slices or oranges or whatever was in season and that would be our "snack" before bed. I hope that is what you mean by a snack.
Your child is listening to their body and stopping when they are full and you are trying to teach them to eat more than they want which is why most of American is obese. They do not listen to their bodies when they are full.

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J.S.

answers from Albany on

I do not have a suggestion but my 27 month old does the same exact thing. He will eat his cereal or oatmeal for breakfast, eat it all and want more. I offfer a banana or apple. He eats the Banana...it gets down to the last 2 or 3 bites and doesnt want anymore. At dinner time it is a nightmare. He either refuses to eat and tells me it's yucky or he will eat a few bites and ask to go and play. I do not let him go play until he eats what is on his plate (and it usually is like 5 bites at the most), he usually tries to get down from his seat and i dont let him, i tell him if he doesnt eat he gets no milk, no toys, no snack no nothing and he still refuses to eat. Sometimes if he knows that he will be at the table for a while he will finish his food and ask if i am proud of him. If i am proud he will finish all of his food, if i tell him i am not proud, he wont eat another bite.

If any one has any tips on something to try i am more then willing to try it.

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K.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

it seems like for whatever reason, your son has made an association between getting down from his chair and getting/wanting more food. whatever is driving this association doesn't really matter IMO. you can change what he associates with having a snack, though, to try and break the pattern.

when he gets down from his chair and asks for a snack, ask him to to do something. make it into a game... have him do a small task/chore or distract/redirect him somehow to increase the amount of time between getting down from the chair and snack, and then reinforce his good behavior and following instructions by giving him a snack. after he gets used to this, you could slowly fade out the task/chore part and just give him a snack when he asks appropriately for one!

i'm a behavioral therapist and this is what i would try. oh, and btw, i'm 26 years old and still won't eat the last bite of a cheeseburger, or the end pieces of bread. they're the "butts" and i just don't like them! lol!

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

I think the thing now is to not make kids finish all the food on their plates. With childhood obesity on the rise, it seems like experts are saying not to do that so kids can recognize when they are full and stop when they are full. I never make my kids finish all their food. That being said, if they want a dessert afterwards they at least have to finish their veggies or salad.

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E.P.

answers from Fresno on

GIVE HIM HIS SNACKS! he has a fast metabolism and small stomach which is why he needs smaller portions and more often.

You should never punish a child for not finishing a meal. For many reasons but mainly because it's pointless. Why? because you're body takes what it needs from the food you eat and disposes of the rest. SO no matter how much you keep eating after you already feel full it's still gonna go to waste.

He may also need more balanced meals. Say he gets enough sugar and fiber from the cereal bar now his body's asking him for some carbs & protein. i don't mean feed him candy all day if he asks for it but if he's asking for a healthy snack don't say no.

You're brain controls you're appetite so thinking he HAS to finish whats in front of him could cause him to actually be LESS hungry and alter his little nervous system which is very bad! If you want him to be healthy don't let the size of a any meal determine how hungry he should be.

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R.P.

answers from Cleveland on

have you ever thought maybe he is just FULL? seriously if he is eating most of his meal and eating healthy and not asking for a snack 20 minutes after a meal then just let him have a snack a couple hours between meals, and its not right to eat in front of your son, would you like someone to eat in front of you when your hungry?

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Perhaps you shouldn't force him to eat every last bite!! He is not going to eat everything you put in front of him. 2 and 3 year olds are extremely picky eaters. This is very common. He shouldn't be deprived of his snacks because those are very important to his growth. I have read that at this age, kids get the majority of the calories through breakfast, morning snack and lunch. It stated that dinner is not as important.

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R.F.

answers from Austin on

I don't think it is healthy to make him eat when he is not hungry. Maybe you should give him the last bits of his food for a snack later, and he has to eat that before he can eat anything else?

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M.G.

answers from Chicago on

Please don't encourage your son to eat all of his food. If he doesn't finish, he doesn't finish. We have such a weight problem in this country, and I think some of it stems from our parents and grandparents training us to always finish our plates. Does he really need those last few bites? Probably not. Kids should stop eating when they are no longer hungry. It's also dangerous to use food as a reward, especially to make a kid eat more. By eating those last two bites, he gets to eat more later. Your son's eating habits will be better off if he can just stop eating when he's done, provided he doesn't come to you 30 minutes later still hungry. But, based on what you said he's asking for seconds and not finishing those. It sounds like he's getting enough to eat. I wouldn't push the issue.

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T.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

He's 2. My daughter does the same thing. She's been doing it since she was 2 and is 3 now and still doing it. Sometimes they get tired of eating the thing they asked for and want something else. I don't make her finish what she is eating I just won't let her have anything else unless it's fruit and then I make sure it's a small portion. I can understand your frustration but he is just 2. He is trying to see what he can and can not get away with. Don't let it bother you. He is getting the food he needs he also just wants a little bit of everything else. They get bored with this easily at this age including food. Maybe just give him a little of his favorite things. Good Luck.

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