2 Questions for All....

B.,
You certainly have a bright child and I think both of your questions go together. For example, she is learning so much at a fast rate and maturing that at the end of her day she wants comfort and something familiar. Thats a lot like us grown ups in terms of coming home at the end of a busy work day and needing some down time. My suggestion is that you continue to give her the bottle but ADD something else with it such as a snuggle on the couch, read her a book, etc. something else that she will associate with comfort. Then, introduce the sippy cup. She'll love your company more than whatever her milk is in anyway so she'll catch on. I won't share with you how old I was when I stopped drinking out of a bottle (downright embarassing!) but if your wondering about long term effects such as crooked teeth, mine are straight with no need for orthodontia. So don't rush your baby, she'll catch on soon enough.

Good luck!

Hi B.:

My son just got off the bottle at 23.5 months. At daycare he drank from a nuby sippy cup for the past 8 months but as soon as he would get into the car he would cry for his baba and if he got a sippy instead he'd throw it and refuse to drink. He also refused it at home altoghether. I consulted my Dr. and he said that you have to be firm with him - he might refuse to drink for a few days (which will not hurt him) but when he is really thirsty he will drink from what is available. The Dr. said that he was conflicted about growing up - wanted to be a big boy like everyone else at school and still a baby with us. At the same time we were doing some sleep training so once he settled into a good routine, I used the same strategy:
Made him a little story book with pictures about being a big boy and how big boys don't drink from babas and he was going to be a big boy very soon and only drink from his sippy. I read that to him for a few days telling him the change was coming in X no. of days and then just took the baba away. He didn't drink too much for the first 2 days but by the 3rd he was great. Didn't want milk in the sippy for almost 2 weeks but now drinks it fine. I supplemented with juice containing calcium in the meantime.

Obviously, your daughter is a VERY bright girl and can understand the meaning of the story. My sleep coach said that the book helps bright kids to be more prepared for the change and gives them more of a chance to embrace it and feel a bit more in control not just having it sprung on them.

One thing that I also noticed was that my son never took a pacifier or sucked his thumb and he was definitely pacifying on the bottle. This might also be the case with your daughter making it a bit harder.

Good luck - you can do it! I think it's harder on us thinking we are depriving them of something...remember you know your child better than anyone else so you will know when it's the right time and she can handle it.

I had to get tough with my son with the sippy cup. He would take a few sips and then refuse it. However when I offered him a bottle he would drink nonstop. I got tough with him this past week and when he sees me he knows that I sippy cup is coming because the bottle is not an option. I am slowly replacing his bottles that I send with him to daycare one by one with a sippy cup and soon he will be completely off of it. When he is REALLY Thirsy he will slurp down the entire cup of milk. He is 11 months now. Good luck!

Do you, your husband or your parents give in to her when she asks for the bottle? It sounds like you do. If so, then you are the reason that she wants a bottle. With my son, he would only give my husband a hard time b/c my husband would give in to his requests. If you are firm and strong the bottle will go away. If you keep giving in, you will continue to have problems. If your daughter learns the louder I cry the more I get my way she will start to do that with everything.

Probably the main reason your daughter gives the family a hard time is b/c she knows that you love her no matter what. The babysitter is someone that might not "love" her anymore if she is "bad" or hard to deal with. It's the same way when they get older with teachers. Sometimes children will go out of their way to make others like them and treat you horribly but it just proves that they know you love them and always will. When my son was little he used to be a perfect angel for the babysitters and then when I came home he was like a little devil. They are going to push the limits with you no matter what. You have to be consistent and firm. Good luck.

She sounds really smart. I have a 21 month little boy. I get enormous joy & a sense of accomplishment whenever he does something new. It means we must be doing something right. Be strong and take that bottle away!!!
p.s. If you throw out all your bottles it will be easier for everyone involved to move on.

For the milk issue, if it were my daughter I would just give her a cup. If she doesn't drink it then she doesn't drink it and goes to bed without it. She'll fight and cry but you can't give in. She'll eventually give in to you and take the cup.

As for thinking your daughter is advanced, she sounds just like my daughter! But my daughter does seem to be advanced compared to the other kids I take care of at church. So...if your daughter is advanced, so is mine! :) I often wonder if it's just because I stay home and she was my first whereas most of the other kids have older siblings or their mother's work.

I'm with the others who say that you must be firm and consistent. Don't give in to her request for a baba. Don't argue, stay calm. Tell her there is no baba for her. Offer her the sippy cup. If she doesn't want it, then so be it. Put it away and walk away. She'll figure it out eventually.

As for how advanced she may or may not be, I don't know. But I'll tell you that even if she's a genius, it does not necessarily point to easy academic success. My eldest son seemed to be ahead of every child his age. Before age two he knew his alphabet, spoke in long sentences and even knew some sight words. By 3 he could read signs he saw when we were out driving. When he started kindergarten, he was reading at a 3rd grade level. Genius, right? LOL! That boy was the near-death experience for every teacher he ever had! Strong-willed and stubborn, but sweet and charismatic, as well. A month before his high school graduation, we received a fail notice for chemistry. He managed to pass in the nick of time, but it was just one more "Patrick moment" for all of us. His standardized testing was always off the chart, but he never was motivated by grades. He was very satisfied that he knew the material and saw no reason to prove it by doing homework. As a result, we refused to invest money in his college education unless he proved he could conform. He paid his own way through community college and aced his classes. He's now transferred to a state university and is still doing well, this time on our dime.
On the other hand, my youngest son never spoke a word until he was 3 years old. He could barely read even halfway through first grade. He was shy and withdrawn and we were sure there was something wrong with him. He was tested every way possible and he was completely fine. Turns out he's the natural born student now. Always in honors classes, fantastic grades, high SATs, Eagle Scout, scholarships.
Go figure. You never really know how they'll turn out. You just do your best to help them find their strengths and weakness and they almost always end up surprising us!