2 Month Old Wont Take a Bottle, HELP I Have to Go Back to Work Soon....

Updated on March 20, 2008
J.M. asks from Minneapolis, MN
37 answers

I am wondering what has worked for other moms? Or if anyone HAS gone back to work with their child not taking a bottle - What happened?
My 2 month old son continues to refuse the bottle. I have been trying hard for 3 weeks, one - two feedings a day. Only have 3 weeks left before I go back to work. I am starting to panic. I Have tried 7 different nipples (5 diff bottles), positions, people, times of day, hungry and not hungry. He still seems to do best taking the bottle from me. Absolutely NOT from Dad. My pediatrician told me to call the lactation lady I have twice and I seem to be doing everything already. Than she just tells me when he is hungry he will eat. That is not easy to comprehend especially when he is going to a new daycare unfortunately different from my oldest's daycare.
A typical bottle attempt goes like this. When you put the bottle near him he starts screaming. We keep working with him calming him down and trying again, now limiting or attempts at 20 minutes. We have gone as long as an hour. When he's not histarically balling chews on the nipple and pushes it out of his mouth with his tounge. Sometimes we do get him to start sucking. He does well initially than often pulls it too far into his mouth and it gags him. Not choking like the milk is coming to fast. I have tried shorter nipples and we still have better luck with the Rubber Platex drop in. I am on the edge of pushing him harder or backing off worried about creating an oral aversion. At times he has shown some signs of it.

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So What Happened?

Thanks all for the advice and the support. I did decrease my work agreement to just 3 days a week. My little guy has had 7 days at daycare now and is setteling into a routine. The first few days he fussed for 15-30 min of the first few bottles of the day. But he now takes the bottle without any troubles!

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T.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I know every baby is different, but this is worth a shot. My daughter liked her bottle really warm, and we ran the vacuum cleaner while we were feeding her to calm her down. It worked when nothing else did. We eventually ran the vacuum just to get her started and then not at all.

Good Luck!

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M.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

My daughter had the same aversion to bottles before I went back to work. The first few days she just didn't really eat until I got home. (luckily she wasn't up all night, either, but somehow just managed) I don't know the technique they used at daycare, but they mentioned that the teacher who was a mom and had BF was able to get her to take a bottle by holding her really tight. They also recommended Gerber Clearview bottles with the really little rubber nipples. The first couple weeks she would only take an ounce or two at a time, but after about two weeks she was up to a 3 ounce bottle.
Good luck!

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J.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Babies tell us exactly what they want and your baby wants you! Is there any way you can put off going back to work? I know it's hard (been there, done that) but what is more important? A contented, happy baby or that second income, at least for a little while longer? All the lactation counseling in the world will not replace what your baby is demanding - your loving nuture. They only stay little for a moment and no one can do a better job of caring for them emotionally and physically than you!

Homeschooling SAHM of seven who learned the hard way, hoping to encourage others.

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J.R.

answers from Davenport on

My little one wouldn't take any bottle with the traditional cylindrical nipple - we tried Playtex VentAire, Soothie, Avent, Platex with the disposable liner, Dr. Brown's, and the first years "Second Nature" too....we finally found these bottles that have a flatter nipple, it is more similar to the shape mothers' nipples go to inside the baby's mouth.....here is a link(at the bottom of the page it shows the smaller 5 oz. bottles, too):

http://www.target.com/Sassy-MAM-9-oz-Bottles-Colors/dp/B0...

http://www.mambabyusa.com/sassy/go?d=bottles

These are the only bottles she would take, and she did great with them. They also have a vent system to let bubbles out the bottom, and our baby was never gassy using these. They are BPA free, and come apart into 5 pieces for easy cleaning (lid, nipple, nipple ring, bottle body, bottom and vent). The second link is where you can order the different nipple flow sizes....my baby only needed a size one nipple (that comes on the 5 oz bottles) till she was 8 months...then size 2 - which comes on the 9 oz. bottles, after that, we never went above size 2. I never had any leaks or issues with them, unless I put them together wrong.

Sometimes you can find them on eBay too, that is where we got all 6 of ours.

Good Luck.

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M.G.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi, I am an RN with some experience in pediatrics. It is not unusual for an infant not to take a bottle from the primary source or even from someone else if she is within "smelling" distance. It would be better for you and him if you allow someone who will be taking care of him to give him the bottle...perhaps you could leave him with her/him for an hour or so every day before you return to work. Don't feed him but try to arrange a time around the time you would normally nurse him. I don't know if you are planning using formula or your own saved breastmilk, but the breastmilk might be more acceptable to him since sometimes the consistency/taste are so very different than breast milk.
Hang in there, he will take it eventually.

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B.H.

answers from Madison on

Have you tried different milk temps? My 3 1/2 month old just had a hard time at the sitter with a bottle, and we figured out the milk wasn't warm enough for her liking.

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J.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

I feel your pain :) My three month old recently starting refusing the bottle in much the same way a week before I went back to work. Hysterically crying and screaming. I know that you said you tried various bottles and nipples but I have had success with a product I had never seen before (this is my third child) called "Breastflow". It's a 1st years product and I got it a Target. It's very odd looking because it has a nipple within a nipple that is supposed to simulate the "latch on" and "letdown" of breastfeeding. While bottling is still not her favorite thing in the whole world she will eat from this one. Good Luck!

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J.J.

answers from Des Moines on

I had a similar situation when I went back to work after my daughter was born. I had a great daycare provider who worked through it with her and I was also able to go and nurse once during the day on my lunch hour - If you are close enough to get there once a day that may help - and then we nursed when I picked her up.

We did this and kept trying other things and in the end, I found a great bottle recommended by another mom with the same problem. It is the Sassy MAM bottle. You can order from Target.com, but they don't sell them at the store.

Good luck - I know it can be tough!

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D.L.

answers from Lincoln on

i haven't had a chance to read all the other responses. but i had a similar problem when my daughter was 2mos & we switched to the playtex "natural" nipples with our drop-ins. They are a tan color & theres somethind about the texture they like better. i swear we had an episode where she screamed in the car until i switched the nipple on her bottle & then WA-LA! magic.
good luck & hang in there, i know it can be very frustrated.
also, have you had his ears checked for infection? bc it might hurt him physically to change his sucking pattern.

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A.H.

answers from Waterloo on

My daughter has never taken a bottle, so good luck. Maybe he's trying to tell you something. Is there possibly a way that you could work from home at least part-time? Many employers will let you telecommute even if this was not an option before it doesn't hurt to ask. I personally changed my profession to go into direct sales so I could stay home with my daughter and I am thankful every day that I made that choice. She is now almost a year and I've never had to pump or give her a bottle. Another option at least until he's used to it is to ask for longer lunch breaks so you could at least go and nurse him once during the day. As for a bottle to try they say just to pick one and stick with it until he gets used to it.

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K.L.

answers from Rochester on

OH MY its the same problem i had with my son. i breastfeed him for 8 months. i went back to work after being with him for 3 months. he did not want to take his bottle no matter what i tryed. i cryed, he cryed , but with time he had no choice.he was hungry. he only took his bottles from me (sometimes even that would not work, he would look for my breast) he would reject his bottles, he lost about one lb in a 3 week period and the only bottle that worked for him (after i bought everything out there) was playtex, VentAir. and later it was Avent, Natural. so i say try to feed your baby at your sceduled time. if he refuses then he will have no choice but to eat at next feeding. even then if it does not happen then wait and try later. i know it sounds mean and it hurts to listen their cry but trust me, give it about 2 weeks and it will happen. hope this helped

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M.F.

answers from Bismarck on

I went back to work when my youngest was only 3 wks old (just part-time though). He refused a bottle almost all of the time that I was away from him. All my other kids had no trouble transitioning from breast to bottle & back, but he wanted nothing to do with it, even when it had breastmilk in it. I'm surprised he takes the bottle best from you; I always had to have my husband introduce the bottle. Anyway, I would nurse him right before I left for work & again right away when I picked him up from day care (he was ravenous by then!). Only occasionally would he take a bottle from them. He survived, but like I said, I didn't work every day (but he went about 7 hours without eating on the days that I worked).

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C.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

First of all, relax. Your baby is picking up on your anxiety.

Next, choose ONE bottle/nipple combination and stick with it. He will get used to it. Trying a million different kinds is only confusing him.

Then leave him with someone else for the better part of a day. Pump a bunch of milk and leave it behind. Go shopping, go to the library, eat out--whatever trips your trigger. Tell whoever you leave him with to bring their sense of humor and some earplugs. While you're out enjoying yourself, your babysitter should offer him the bottle once or twice when he cries. If he won't take it, don't force it. Try again every 15 minutes or so.

If you can, get creative with your work schedule. See if you can postpone going back to work for a week or two, or go back only PT initially. Maybe you can take a 2 hour lunch so you can go breastfeed--whatever you need to do and whatever your employer allows.

Lastly, he may never take a bottle "perfectly". My son drank from a bottle right away, but he won't take one if I'm even in the same room. He "roots" initially and takes a few seconds to latch on. Even though we have the slowest flow nipple on the market (Avent, 1-hole) milk still pools around his mouth; he can't swallow it fast enough. But he does eat.

Hang in there! This will be a bitter memory soon.

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L.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had a child like that! She would scream at the bottle like we were trying to poison her! I had her in "daycare" for a week for something special, otherwise I was always home with her. During that week she NEVER took a bottle from the sitter. Not once. The sitter had to give her babyfood to get through the day. She was 4 months old.

I recently found a new bottle that I would try if I was nursing a little one again. The Adiri Natural Nurser Ultimate Bottle. http://thesoftlanding.com/adnanu.html It looks so much more like a real breast, lol. The nipple doesn't come off the bottle, the bottom of the bottle comes off. Strange, but looks like it might work!
Good luck! I feel your pain.

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A.G.

answers from Minneapolis on

There are other options besides a bottle. If your son will suck on your finger, you can use a tube and a syringe to feed him. I also did this with my babies before they were old enough to take a bottle. Babies can drink from a cup almost from birth. It is tricky and takes a while, but it works. Both of my babies did it. Ask a lactation consultant about these options. She can give you some more specific directions and supplies. I also agree with the mother who said to relax about going back to work. You may need to wait awhile or work part-time. Maybe your job will work with you on this one. Good luck!

A.

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C.W.

answers from Milwaukee on

Hi, J.. I see you've received a lot of good advice. I'm a mom of three breastfed children. We had trouble switching to a bottle with my oldest, but it eventually worked out. I know that for your husband to give your son a bottle, it would be helpful for him to hold an article of your clothing(that smells like you) during the feeding. I agree that you should choose one type of bottle, preferably with a nipple that is similar in shape to yours when nursing. Make sure the breastmilk is body temperature or very slightly warmer. Be sure to be relaxed when feeding with the bottle, as you do to let down milk when nursing. Your son can sense your tension if you are anxious about whether or not he will take the bottle and may get upset. If your husband wants to try he should also be relaxed and try to hold the baby the same way you do when you feed him. If he starts to root you could put the bottle in the position where the nipple would be for breastfeeding. We did find in the beginning that the baby's postion for nursing made a big difference in how well my daughter took the bottle. It may be helpful for you to leave the room when your husband is trying to feed him. P.S. I've worked in daycare for the last 8 years and have seen many parents cope with this same situation. I hope this information is helpful to you. Best wishes. C.

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J.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

J.,
I know what you're going through regarding your little one taking a bottle. I have three children now, and nursed them all for almost a year. My oldest was the hardest to take a bottle at 4 months. I had to go back to work within weeks and she still wasn't taking a bottle. I was so worried and frustrated. My husband was the one who worked with her over and over and over. I actually had to leave the house crying and go for a walk because I just couldn't take her crying. On top of it all she was collicky, horribly. To make matters worse we were on vacation out of state because I was in a wedding and he needed to feed her while I was at rehearsal and in the wedding. She refused the entire time. You can hear my baby crying throughout my friend's whole wedding ceremony on the video tape. It was just horrible because I was leaking too while this was happening in my bridesmaid dress.

So, like I said, I know how you feel. When they tell you he'll drink from the bottle when he's hungry, it's true. When we got back from vacation, we just decided not to nurse her at all until she took from a bottle. She finally gave in. I guess that would be my suggestion. Don't feed him anything or nurse her. He may know right now that you will eventually nurse him if he doesn't take the bottle. I'm assuming that's what you're doing so far. He's smart. He knows Mommy loves him too much to hear him cry. I would suggest not giving him anything until he takes the bottle. He will give in. I know it sounds cruel, but he will give in before he starves. It helps too, I think, to have someone else do it. That way, when you take him she knows you will give him the nipple he really wants.

My only hesitation on the advice is the fact that you said he is a preemie. Mine weren't, so I'm not up on the facts for premature babies. I hope this helps.

I feel your pain!

I also agree with the not going back to work if you don't have to. That is just huge. The attachment is normal and there is a reason for it.
J.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

My daughter did the same thing shortly before I had to go back to work. What we tried was having me start nursing her for a few minutes. This at least calmed her down so she wasn't screaming. Then my husband fed her a bottle and I walked out the room. Daycare said the first two days were a little rough, but she seemed to enjoy the Playtex drop ins with the brown nipple the best. Now she reaches out for her bottle and has adjusted well. Good luck.

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C.S.

answers from Milwaukee on

Try not to panic, to talk to a real person try calling La Leche League. My 4th child did not nurse for the first month of his life, we fed him with an eye dropper, cup and finally a bottle. I have heard of babies who waited all day to nurse when mom got off of work. If your schedule is flexible maybe your can nurse the baby on your lunch or break.
C.

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K.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hmmm. I was lucky. My Mom did this for me b/c we read that it's easier (!) if the nursing Mom isn't there b/c the baby smells the Mother and just wants the breast.

But my son didn't take it willingly initially. It was hard just calming him down. One thing that helped calm him to sleep was a hair dryer. I know, sounds super loud, but we'd turn that thing on (in the same room, not next to his ear) (or a vaccum cleaner) and whammo, no crying. So my mom propped a hairdryer in a metal bowl (to prevent overheating) next to her and just kept offering the bottle. It took a day or two for him to get the message "this is your only source of food right now" ( I was still nursing most of the time, so this was just so they could feed him when I needed to be away). I'd keep trying with Dad or some other saint. And don't be ashamed to wear earplugs. I did at times.

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C.D.

answers from Sioux Falls on

Hi-

I have a 23 month old that would only take a bottle at nap and at night. Otherwise she'd arch her back and scream. She had acid reflux and a milk allergy. We switched to Alimentum (no milk formula), got her on Prevacid and had an Occupational Therapist come work with her because it had gone on for so long that she just hated eating. Guess she knew that eating hurt her tummy and was trying to prevent the hurt. Good luck!

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B.B.

answers from Bismarck on

I am a daycare provider and as the lactition has already told you they will eat when they are hungry. Don't force it. Let him ask/cry for it. Then you will know that he is hungry. It will take a couple of missed feedings before he realizes that he IS hungry. Hang in there - if you have a good provider that is patient with this she maybe able to help you. And relax, he feels your tension. Good luck

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J.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

my second daughter had a really hard time taking a bottle too. my first took it like it was a piece of cake. i tried everyone and finally came upon the breastflow bottles (i think they have them at target). i think what she liked about it, was that it allows for a slow flow initially (they have to suck the milk into the outer nipple) and then it speeds up (like the breast). in addition, the shape seemed easier for her to control. My HUGE advice is...don't wait until he's hungry! try feeding him a bottle when he is just sorta hungry. Imagine if someone waited until your blood sugar was plummeted and then offered you a plate of really tiny food with chopsticks. how frustrated would you be? what worked best for me was:
-practicing the bottle when she wasn't overly starving
-doing it while she was in a bouncy seat...singing and bouncing, more like play
-using breastmilk...to keep the familiarity
i also had to realize that, for me, working was a necessity. and that i was willing to find anyway for her to succeed and so were my daycare providers. we worked together. she still won't take a bottle at home - from anyone. but at daycare she will take a bottle (any type) willingly. she learned that it's ok and it works for her.
you will be ok. he will eat. i guess i'm just offering my 2 cents because i was really worried about some of the advice - if he's hungry he'll eat and to not go back to work! easier said then done sometimes. good luck! feel free to ask me another question if you need to! (sidenote...i am a speech-language pathologist...we do some education on feeding issues...my doc said when i was really worried about her eating...told me that she would probably send me to me for advice...ha ha)

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C.H.

answers from Milwaukee on

Do you make sure the bottle is warm? when my dd was 3 months I had the same problem, then I heated the bottle warmer, and VOILA..it worked.

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J.M.

answers from Davenport on

I don't know if it is possible for you but when I went back to work after having my daughter I went and nursed her at lunch until she got the hang of having bottles all day. That way I knew that she was getting enough while she was transitioning. I didn't even give her a bottle before taking her to daycare. They also have special nipples now that act more like a breast because they only let milk out if the baby sucks it. I have seen them a drug stores. It will work out fine, it always does. Good Luck!

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A.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

A baby who cannot take a bottle for whatever reason is a medical emergency that requires you to stay home until you figure it out. Your work will have to give you a longer leave since you cannot just drop him at a daycare hoping he'll "get over it". It could be a hundred things... any number will have to be resolved before you leave him. Start by giving in to this reality and you will relax a little as you find the answers.

It is easy for a new mom to believe that she has to go back to work right on the day her leave ends, but this is NOT true! Take the time your baby needs to adjust - the world will wait.

Try this: Put something other than breast milk in the bottle - my recommendation is a sweetened tea... chammomile perhaps, which is calming, and sweeten it with something natural like maple syrup (not honey - babies cannot eat honey). Drip a little into his mouth before you gently put in the nipple so he can taste something new that interests him.

This won't be an actual feeding, so only give him an ounce or two if he'll drink it. Day by day he will get used to the nipple if he likes the new flavored drink. One day do a few ounces of breast milk in the bottle to see if he will take it. Mix the two - tea and breast milk if you have to (yummmm.... tea and milk!).

If this doesn't work, you might have a case of a baby with a latex allergy or other compound allergy. If you haven't tried non-latex nipples, look for them. If you have, you may be in for a long road.

Either way J., you are going to have to relax about working for now. Really - take a deep breath and believe for a moment that the world will not stop if you miss a few weeks or a few months of work. Give yourself permission to have time with your new baby to figure out life with him.

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A.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I have read a lot of the other responses and have seen many mom's saying to stay home longer if possible. I am a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant and also work a full-time job. I have a 10.5-month old that I am still nursing. I know a lot of mothers who are able to stay at home to raise their children while running a home based business. Maybe this is God's way of telling you that you need to take a change in your life. My goal is to be able to pick up my business and stay at home with my children. They are only little for so long and we need to cherish more than we do. Good luck to you. A.

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L.C.

answers from Madison on

Here's a good website that gives advice on a different feeding method with bottles that helps reduce flow preference or nipple preference - a baby that prefers the breast and won't take the bottle or vice versa: http://www.lowmilksupply.org/bottles.shtml

Also read the section on recommended nipples. I used this in the beginning when we were supplementing baby with breast milk in bottles. What you mentioned about the milk coming too fast is common, and refers to flow preference, and this method of bottle feeding mimics breastfeeding in that the milk does not pour into their mouth and they have to work for it, same as in breastfeeding.

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J.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son also would not take a bottle and I was heading back to work. I tryed every nipple too, I found he like the Dr. Brown's nipples the best and I had my Mom feed him the bottle since he didn't take it well for my husband also. Maybe if you have another woman (Mom, sister, close friend) that could try feeding him besides you he'll get the hang of it. It did take some time for my son but he got use to the bottle.

Hang in there.

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S.P.

answers from Des Moines on

I too had difficulty with my daughter taking a bottle. She ended up liking the old school playtex bottles with the latex nipples. It helped when we warmed the nipple before introducing it to her. When I did have to go back to work, she never really drank as much as I know she did with me, but my family needed the income. I have also heard of babies who never did take a bottle and would wait until mom could nurse. I would suggest seeing if you can wait longer to go back to work, trying to nurse on breaks. Just weigh out your needs and what is feasible for your life and be comfortable with your decision. Your son will adapt to any changes - kids are resilient. Try not to worry so much and let things happen...I know it's difficult to do! Trust yourself and you'll be fine!

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M.I.

answers from Des Moines on

My son would also not take the bottle. We were getting ready to do a lot of traveling over the summer and I didn't want to have to stop every three hours to breastfeed him. We tried 5-6 types of bottles. I too called the lactation specialist and she had a "special" nipple that she gave me that fit on the medela bottles. She said that it worked with most of the babies that had this problem. Sure enough, it worked! It did take a little while till he was able to really suck down a whole bottle but he was able to at least get enough to get by at first. The nipple didn't have a name or anything on it but the milk drips out like crazy so he didn't have to do much work to get the milk out. Now at 13 months he doesn't want to give that bottle up! And I have milk dripping all over my floor whenever he leaves it laying on its side.

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D.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hello: Have you tried Dr. Brown's bottles? I purchased them at Babies R Us . . . it was the only bottle my daughter would take. They are very close to the breast and she transitioned well to these. We were in the same boat when I had to go back to work as well.

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J.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

I have 2 boys 20 months and 8 months. My younger son was a preemie so he had a bottle from the start but both of my children always had a preference for me over the bottle. We found that the stage 1 nipples were too hard for our boys to get any milk from so they would get frustrated so we used the stage 2 playtex nipples from the start. The playtex ventaire bottles are the only ones our boys would take. Also, I found that if I was present it was more difficult to get them to take the bottle.
Both of our boys went on a "bottle strike" on a couple of occasions after I returned to school. I spoke with the pediatrician and she said they would eat what they needed to and would make up for what they didn't eat when they are back with you. I hope this helps. Good Luck!

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B.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

Bless your heart for wanting to do so much. The real problem may not be that your baby doesn't want the bottle, it may be the problem of maternity leaves being too short today. Moms of young babies are expected and expect themselves to be available to the working world and also be physically available to their babies. Many override their own instincts and concerns entirely as they deal with the practical difficulties of taking action with it.
You will get some good, practical advice about the bottle problem from experienced moms with your question. My advice (free - take it for what it's worth)! is more along the lines of that probably, although your job needs your two month old to take the bottle, he seems to need you and your milk instead. The level of anxiety you feel is a testament to how in tune you are to your newborn! Many pressures confront you. At least allow yourself to consider thinking outside the box at this point and know that that through the ages, as mothers of new babies, our natural instincts have always pulled us violently and strongly away from leaving our babies for more than an hour or two when they were tiny. That is normal and (here's where my advice comes in) that anxiety is good! What we ask of ourselves instead is extremely difficult, as it goes against our guts and the way babies and moms are made. The implications of not returning to work right now seem to be unquestioned but maybe the matter has already been settled? Sometimes the obvious and natural can be right in front of us and we can miss it, so I just thought I would override my natural inhibitions about sharing my reactions if it's controversial, and throw in my two cents anyway. I think about how the whole breastfeeding process is designed for mothers and babies to stay together. Sure seems "meant to be" for us to physically stay with our newborns. I know it may be presumptuous to say as a stranger but is there any way they and you and your family can extend your maternity leave? WHo cares why he won't take the bottle if he doesn't have to right now!

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S.S.

answers from Sioux Falls on

I am sorry to hear that you are having trouble and not to make light of the situation but it could be as simple as the bottle is not mommy. This is fairly common in breastfed infants even preemies.

I have a daycare and see it quite often. I know that there is a lot of advocates for breastfeeding and I agree that it is better than formula but I am guessing that you are probably going to end up supplementing at daycare with formula, I have had several parents that had to do that b/c their child would go all day and refuse the breastmilk, I had one mom that would feed baby @ 6 am drop of at 7 come back @ 11:30 and pick up at 5:30 b/c baby would not take any bottle even for mom and dad, like she could hold out 12 hours and they would finally give in.

I would talk to the pediatrition and ask about formula and would recommend trying it, at least then you will know one way or another.

Hope this helps and good luck, please keep us posted as to the outcome.

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J.S.

answers from Milwaukee on

My son, who is now 11 months did the exact same thing when i went back to work. i was an absolut wreck my 1st few months back at work. i too tried many different bottles, the Playtex drop-ins w/ the latex nipple worked for us. as hard as it is to comprehend, your son will eat if he's hungry. trust me, he will. don't force the bottle b/c he will sense the stress that you or whom ever is trying to give him the bottle. if your trying to force it, he'll never relax and take it. my son was probably 5 months before he finally gave in and started taking the bottle- but we have continued to have bottle issues. the second i would pick him up after work, i would nurse him. he continued to gain weight (even w/out eating most of the day)and is a very happy healthy boy. now he's on solids and doens't want to eat much for his sitter while i'm at work. but as soon as i get home and we sit down for dinner he eats like a little piggy. it all worked out in the end, and it will for you as well. Just hang in there and stay calm, don't force the issue. i cannot tell you how many times i left work to go to the sitters house to try to get him to eat, and i would get myself so worked up over it. once i finally relaxed and accepted the situation for what it was, we just learned to deal with it. bottom line, if he's hungry- he will eat.
Hang in there and good luck :)

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J.B.

answers from Madison on

Hi J. :)

I went through the same thing with my daughter! She also would take the bottle better from me at first. If my husband tried giving her one, she would have NOTHING to do with it! After doing some research on the issue I came across something that said not to force bottle feeding on to your baby because they will start to view the bottle as something negative and this might cause them to avoid bottles for even longer. So I decided to take a gentle approach. Once a day, about 15 minutes before I knew she would be hungry and during a time of day when she wasn't sleepy (that way she wouldn't get frusturated while trying to learn something new) I would rock her and hold the bottle right at her lips. If she wanted to try taking the bottle she would open her mouth. If she didn't, she would turn away. I NEVER put the nipple in her mouth unless she gave me the "ok" by opening her mouth. Some days she would just play with the nipple by chewing on it, some day she would flat out refuse the bottle all together, some days she would actually drink 1 or 2 ounces from it! After about two weeks of this she finally ate an entire meal from a bottle! :) After that, we had to work on getting her to take the bottle from my husband. What worked for us was for him to rock her, then I would put the bottle in her mouth and then he would take over from there. After a few times of doing this she started taking the bottle from him without my help. She is now taking the bottle no matter when we give it to her or where she is! :)

Here are some things that other people suggested to me before she was taking a bottle. I didn't try any of these things but you might find something helpful :) A pediatrician suggested dipping the nipple of the bottle in a little bit of sugar water so that they baby might be more likely to latch on. Someone else suggested that I leave the house while my husband try bottle feeding (actually I did try this one by going for a walk around the block but it didn't work for us). Sometimes a baby can sense if the mother is still in the house, so they will refuse the bottle from their father because they want their mother. Another suggestion was to leave her for an entire day with someone else so that she was forced to take a bottle if she got hungry. I was warned that she might hold out for 8 hours or longer, and that she would cry, but I'm not into tough love methods and I wanted her to view the bottle as something positive, so I ignored this advice.

I hope you find something that works for you :) And hopefully it works before you have to go back to work! I wish you the best of luck.

(I forgot to mention that the only bottle that worked for us was the Thinkbaby bottle. You can find it on thesoftlanding.com. Also, have you heard of the Adiri Natural Nurser bottles? These bottles are made to be much more like an actual breast than any other bottle. They are specifically designed for babies who are refusing other bottles or having a harder time with bottle feeding. You can also find those on thesoftlanding.com)

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