Here is my ?? My son is a feshman at Truman High School this year (Independence School district) and he hasn't passed any of his classes so to try and get the credits he is gonna attend summer school, here's our problem, the buses are not running regular bus routes, they are having you drop your kids off at certain locations and then buses are picking the kids up from there and taking them to school. The problem is there are no locations close for me to take my son to and on top of that I'm a home child care provider and my first child gets here at 6:15 am. So I am wondering would I be wrong to have my son ride his bike to and from the High School, it is maybe 2 miles away if that (he has walked home before and it takes about 30 minutes or so). I feel like since he is the one that couldn't pass his classes in the first place why should I find someone that can take him to school and pick him up, if he would of done what he was supposed to he would'nt have this problem. I believe in teaching your children to be responsible for their own actions, but without putting them in harms way. He will still be classified as a freshman when he starts school in August. Am I or will I be doing the right thing by making him ride his bike to and from school ??. We have taken away privledges and he HAS to pass summer school in order to get his stuff back or get his drivers permit. If he doesn't pass then he looses even more things.
I have explained to my son his cause is his effect if everyone knows what I mean, him getting good grades doesn't do anything for me it's for his benefit. I have explained no one hands things to you on a silver platter, My husband and I have worked for everything we have and are teaching him the same. I have explained nobody can do it but him. The reason for us taking his things away is because when he doesn't have them he does his school work and the grades come up but when we give them back they go down.
Well I just wanted tell everyone Thank you for your advice and input. I've explained to my son that what he chooses to do now with his grades will greatly effect him when he graduates high school. He asked me today if I would have a problem him moving out when he is 18 and I told him no. But I also told him all the realities to moving out and what comes with it. And at this point he needs to accomplish one to do another. I'm praying he will see not doing homework and getting bad grades is not helping him or going to. We also sat down and did a rough estimate of how much it would cost for him to live on his own, and how much he would have to make at a job. It's funny to me how much he doesn't know, for instance I told him when he goes to have phone, gas, water, electric service turned you have to sometimes pay a deposit and along with those he has to pay a deposit for his rent, he looked like a deer in headlights. So maybe I got somewhere today in the 30 minute conversation we had, I hope and hope and hop and pray and pray and pray. Well until next ladies and gentlemen if you are out there have a good one. I can tell you this I can wait patiently for my younger 3 to get close to his age, lol W.
my 11 year old rode his bike to school every day (about one mile) this year (except when the weather didn't allow it) he didn't have to cross any major streets...
as long as he knows the traffic laws and you live in a safe neighborhood I say let him ride
I would totally make him ride his bike, walk, or find a carpool. Here all the middle school kids walk/ride to school about a mile or two away.
W., It's a small world... I went to Truman High School too! It's been a few years though. (class of '82) I now live in southeast Kansas. I see nothing wrong with having him ride his bike to school. Not sure exactly where you live, but Independence is still a very safe town for a kid to ride his bike in. I guess the only problem would be if you live south of I-70, since I heard they are closing the Noland Road I-70 bridge this summer for reconstruction. Anyway, I used to ride my bike all over town to get to where I was going when I was that age. At that time, I worked at Cool Crest and rode to work from 39th and Noland over to 40 highway! That's quite a trip! But, I did it!
I think he has to be accountable for his actions this past year and if that means riding his bike to take summer classes, so be it. Hang in there Mom!
S.
It's a good idea, BUT is the route to school a decent one, or is he going to have to cross Noland, or any other major roads? That would worry me just a tad... Not to mention some of the yahoos that are out there in some parts of Indep.Plus like some said, how do you know he won't skip? If anything, have him ride his bike to a bus stop? Or find a friend of some sort he could car pool with. Or maybe a parent of one of your daycare kids wouldn't mind dropping him somewhere. Maybe even call the school (or bus barn which ever you need to call) and explain to them there are no routes close by, and if enough parents in that area feel that way, they can always make another stop closer... I don't think the 2mile distance is an issue, I think it's more of safety. Good Luck, and hopefully he brings his grades up!!
You aren't wrong if you make him ride his bike 2 miles. The only thing I would be concerned about is if he has to face the traffic on Noland Rd, just as long as you can trust that he rides responsibly and safely then I see no problem with him making his own way to summer school. If you are really concerned about him getting there safely maybe you could call the school transportation office and see if they would consider re-routing the bus to stop closer to your home if they understand your dilemma?? Just another thought.
W.,
Not to question your son, but if you ask him to ride his bike and he doesn't seem to like school presently, are you sure he'll make it to the school daily? Seems like it might be easy to skip out...?
Kathy
Taking away privileges can provide your son with the time to study and get his life back in balance with the priority being school since it determines his future. If you are punishing him, it may just cause a different problem. Does he fully understand what his grades mean to society, and how he can earn more money for the car he wants, things he wants, etc for the rest of his life? IF he attends school with the attitude of pleasing you, or just getting his priveleges back, it won't solve your problem!!! If he sees school connected to HIS goals, your problem can be solved for good!
This is a great opportunity to show colleges that he failed 9th grade and then turned it around to get A's and B's. Drastic improvement shows great character and determination that are part of all our great people in history. So, in that respect, your son is off to a great start.
Show him with that you want him to succeed for HIM and not just to please you or he may just become an expert at "getting by" or "hiding" things you disapprove of, instead of making great decisions for his life, for HIM to be successful no matter who is around.
Good luck!!!
B.
The school district I attended wouldn't even pick you up by bus if you lived with-in 3 miles of school unless you were under 8. It was assumed that you could walk/bike. Of course that was more than 8 years ago so the rules could have changed, but still. I think it would be fine to have him bike.
I totally agree he needs to be responsible for his own actions.I think it's a great idea.You shouldn't have to inconvience yourself or anyone else because he made some wrong choices.Let him pay for them.Just make sure yiu can trust he will not skip.
As long as you feel he would be safe between school and home, there is nothing wrong with him riding his bike. If he isn't opposed to the idea, then it's a good way for him to stay active every morning and afternoon. If he doesn't like the idea, it will be a good motivator for him to do better in the future. I think you are doing the right thing for everyone involved, because you will already be busy in the mornings, and he is getting an extra lesson in responsibility.
I think it would depend on the school district and how busy the roads were - could her catch a ride with a parent that also has a child in summer school.
B.
If I were the 15 year old with my own transportation, I wouldn't be going to school because I have a way to go somewhere else.
Since you're going to be home though the attraction to return to his room and stuff won't be a draw. I don't know. This wasn't an issue when my oldest was that age, he had extended family at his beck and call to get him to and from school, so we could make sure he was actually there.
Hi W., I just wanted to respond to your post about your son. I personally don't think there would be anything wrong with him riding his bike to the school. And maybe just maybe that will help him to keep his grades up in the future and it wil also give him some great exercise.
Sincerly
D.
Hey W.! I commend you for standing your ground in the area of teaching kids to be responsible for their own actions. So, having this mindset, I think that you are completely right to have your son ride his bike to school.
If it's a safe route, then I see no problem with it. Especially since you have other responsibilites & can't take him to the drop off points. Plus, I think this will teach him to appreciate his "summer school" more and it will help him realize the importance of being responsible. I'd just explain to him the situation that you're in and I'm sure he'll understand why he needs to either walk or ride his bike. He will probably enjoy the little extra freedom in doing this too.
From what you've said, I think you're doing a great job parenting your children. Best wishes! :)
If it is a safe environment, have him ride his bike.
W.
I wanted to comment on your update. My youngest son who is now 25 sounds a lot like yours when he was in his teens. He wouldn't go to school, he just barely passed a lot of his classes, he started lying to me and his dad, etc. He moved out and got an apartment with a couple of his friends when he was 18. He lived hand-to-mouth for 4 years, always having to have roommates because he couldn't get a job that paid enough to support himself and then had to deal with roommates who wouldn't carry their share of the expenses and responsibilites.
Anyway, to make a long story short, he started college a couple of years ago. His dad and I told him he could stay with us as long as he is in college. He has really turned his life around. But he told us one night the biggest surprise to him when he moved out on his own was that he had to buy toilet paper. He said he never thought about how the toilet paper got to our house -- it was always there when he needed it. But when he was on his own, if he needed it, he had to buy it. I thought that really pointed out how little he understood what it takes to be on your own.
