15 Week Old Screaming Before Falling Asleep

Updated on January 10, 2008
M.C. asks from Winthrop, MA
14 answers

hi,

My 15 week old little girl who sleeps great at night (12 hours with one feeding at about 9 hours in) is having a lot of trouble with the transition to sleep and will only nap for 20-45 minutes at a time. I think she is very tired by the end of the day due to these little naps and all the crying it takes for her to fall asleep. Here is the real issue, before falling asleep she will fuss a bit and then go to full blown screaming, If I hold and rock her she does it almost as much as if i put her in the crib and stand over her rubbing her tummy. She will also arch her back and pull away at times when i am rocking her, which usually makes me think i should put her down. She will sometimes take the breast and sometimes refuse it. I am not a real believer in the cry it out method, especially not this young. Eventually she will go to sleep in my arms but it's pretty tramatic for me and seems so for her too. This is even more difficult because it's new, she use to get herself to sleep with relative ease. Anyone got any ideas?

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L.L.

answers from Burlington on

M.-
Have you tried a sling? (Maya wrap is my personal favorite). Maybe just wrapping her up and bouncing/walking. Hang in there, sleep issues do eventually work themselves out!
L.

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K.C.

answers from Boston on

believe me, 15 wks is not to young to cry it out.... it takes a couple REALLY hard days, but then....ahhh. You should look into it, she may even start to take better naps for you. Good luck!

K.

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C.M.

answers from Boston on

It sounds to like me likeyou baby has some sort of pain..maybe from gas or reflux. Pain like that intensifies when they lie down. Most babies even when they are over tired can be rocked or cuddled to fall asleep. What you are describing is something else. I would talk to your doctor and see what they say. You could also try Mylicon. I used it all the time with my daughter. She would hardly ever burp so to prevent too much gas I would give her some after her feedings. As far as the short naps.....has she always been like that or os that new too. What time is her 9 hour feeding? Is it possible to try and keep her up instead of putting her back down....keep her up for a few hours then put her down for a nap? I kow every baby is different, so you have to keep trying different things until something works!

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B.S.

answers from Boston on

If she's tensing and arching her back when she is lying down either in her crib or in your arms, it sounds like gas to me. My children and my niece did the same (regardless of breastfed or formula fed). My children were strictly formula and my niece was only breastfed. A shot of Mylicon did the trick most nights. Be patient, if you stress, she is going to sense it and feel stressed also. Good Luck.

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M.S.

answers from Providence on

Hi M.,
I don't have any advice myself, but I can recommend a super book that helped me a great deal with various sleep issues my children had. Have you heard of Kim West? She wrote a book called "Good Night, Sleep Tight". She is also referred to as the Sleep Lady. The reason I love her is because, like you, I am not one to let kids "cry it out". This is a more gentle and just as effective way to help with the different stages kids go through. I hope you find it helpful!

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S.W.

answers from Boston on

The first thing that comes to mind is that she is starting to teeth. If she's overtired, the teething will make it so tough for them to get to sleep. I've had some long afternoons and evenings trying to get my daughter (2.5 months) down to sleep since she's started the not so joyful ordeal of teething. When she's screaming like this, try rubbing her gums with your finger. That sometimes helps my daughter a little bit. I know motrin was mentioned - last I heard it was not advisable to give motrin or advil to children younger than 6 months old. Children's tylenol should be okay, but double check with her pedi before giving her any meds. As for getting her to sleep longer, I've found that my daughter will nap longer if I have her in her swing or infant seat so I can swing it if she wakes up. Also car rides and stroller rides do the trick, so you may want to take her for a walk in the stroller during nap time (much cheaper than a car ride with the soaring gas prices these days!) Does she use a pacifier or suck her thumb? The sucking action is very soothing as well - well it gets really bad for me, I'll swaddle my girl up tight in a blanket, strap her into the swing while she's swaddled, and put her in the swing on high speed. She'll fuss for a few minutes, but this usually does the trick. Hopefully some of it will work for you as well. Good luck.

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K.T.

answers from Springfield on

M.
Congratulations on your new baby! Both of my daughters exhibited exactly the same behavior as you are telling. They both started out (for the first 8 weeks) as decent sleepers and when they cried it was pretty clear what they needed and they would stop crying when I satisfied their need. At around 8-10 weeks they both started with the unexplained crying sessions in the evening. My husband I and were both pretty firmly against the cry it out thing and so for 1-2 months dealt with a lot of screaming in the evenings. We would take turns soothing her (cause it is a lot for one person to deal with) and when they would finally relax they would fall asleep and we would then put them down. The good thing is that this behavior was temporary (I am fairly certain it was over by 4.5 months with each of them), however with each of them it got worse (ie the crying lasted longer) before better. So I guess my advice is to not give up soothing her when she cries, and know that this crying is only temporary....
Good luck!

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R.M.

answers from Hartford on

Congrats on your little girl! They're so much fun!! my 1 y/o had similar problems when she was little. When i took her in for her checkup I told her pediatrician. He diagnosed her with Acid reflux. You may want to have her checked for that too. My daughter outgrew it by 6 months and is fine now.

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K.C.

answers from Springfield on

it is funny that you asked this question.....when my son was about this age, he would often times have the same behavior although more often before naps, he did have reflux and was medicated for it so i knew this wasnt it, i felt like he was becoming aware of what we were doing and didnt want to do it, but unfortunately he didnt understand any sort of wind down ritual. then again i was nannying for my friends baby and around the same age she had the same problem as well as my nephew. in all three cases we didnt believe in crying it out, it was very traumatic for me but really didnt seem to bother him at all, honestly we sort of stuck to our "guns" our old routines and made him go to sleep eventually it stopped although he really has never been a big fan of sleep and still isnt, i should say alone sleep that is! i would check for reflux, or even a possible ear infection as well, both can have a child think they want to eat because it releives pressure at first but then makes it worse!! lying down never feels good for either thing....so check it out! hope this made some semblense of sense! always hard to type and make sense with mommy brain and running toddler!

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L.R.

answers from Burlington on

Hi M.- Have you tried lalabys with her and how about a book before bed?.My litle one has a blankie she goes to bed each night and has a glo-worm she seems secure with it . Try it and see what she does.

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A.N.

answers from Boston on

I really benefitted from the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. It seems to fall in between the cry it out and no-cry methods but what I like about it is that it has helpful hints for finding and responding to your baby's sleep signals in order to begin to teach them to sleep. I didn't start using it until my daughter was 5 monthes old but now she goes down for two regualar naps a day and to bed at 7pm without crying. She used to have a similarly hard time falling to sleep. I think the book even has a specific chapter to babies your daughter's age.

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D.R.

answers from Portland on

Your daughter uses crying to communicate. She's tired because of the day, that's what she's telling you. Nothing wrong happened, it's normal to be tense at the end of the day and at her age that's the only way to let you know. It's up to you, but I think you should stay with her while she cries. Our son did the same, we stayed with him telling him we love him, we're there, we understand he's tired... and now he's much better.
Babies don't know that you need to relax and lie down in order to fall asleep and they have a tough time figuring it out.
I know it's long long to hear your baby crying before she falls asleep but think this: how do you like people to be with you when you are tired?

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E.H.

answers from Springfield on

It sounds like gas to me. Maybe it bothers her more in certain positions or when she is sleepy. Both of my babies had it. I found that laying my son on my lap tummy down while massaging his back worked really well. My daughter was always happy if I took her outside.
Good luck to you. I know how awful you must feel.
E.

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K.F.

answers from Providence on

Are you sure she is crying because she is tired? the arching of the back sounds like she is uncomfortable, maybe due to gas? Did you recently change anything in yours or her diet? i would try getting more burps out of her and feeding her more upright before she sleeps.

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