13 Year Old Girl

Updated on March 23, 2010
S.G. asks from Gilroy, CA
6 answers

teens having sex and oral sex- need some advice

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So What Happened?

I sat down with this young girl and had a heart to heart reality talk with her. Come to find out she said she isn't particpating in this activity. Since then she has been encouraged to find new friends and has a lot more supervision.

More Answers



answers from San Francisco on

Dear S.,

Take your teen to a free clinic and have her tested STD's. Have the doctor give her a reality check on teen pregnancy and diseases.

Do you know the parents of your daughter's friends? If not, get to know them, talk to them about your concerns and see where they are on the subject.

It's past time to pull in the reins on this child. I would limit her social activities immediately. Have her concentrate on school and family until you feel she can be trusted not to treat her body like an amusement park.


2 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

Communication! Talk to your daughter. Give her the gorey details of what can happen when kids do this. (oral herpes, pregnancy, etc.) You need to be talking to her about the dangers and what sex is all about. I'm sure someone has some good book ideas too, but nothing beats sitting down and talking in a very frank manner.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Fayetteville on

first off your 13 year old shouldn't be having sex. My sister lost her virginity at 13 and did sexual favors for things. You need to go online and print off the dangers of her having sex so early with out thinking. My sister found out she got the Herpes simplex virus 2. Sometimes this is how teenagers act out, at least my sister did and it ended up she went to a therapeutic foster home which helps kids like my sister to get better. Now my sis hasn't had sex in over a year and she's 17 now. If the online things don't work maybe you should see a therapist or enroll her in a class about how it's bad to have sex so early. (is she at least practicing safe sex? Let her know the dangers of becoming pregnant as well. Try to be as nice as you can be while talking to her.) good luck.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

Yes 13 year old teens are having oral sex. This is the latest thing. They can avoid saying they've had sex. The sad thing is, is all the boys are getting BJ's and all the girls are being disrespected. A 13 year old girl shouldn't even be exposed to this type of thing. It's an evil world we live in.

When I was a teenager I don't know if I even heard of this. If I did, it was icky. I would think this would be something that should only be done with ones husband. For goodness sake they pee from there. *shiver*

I hope you were not asking for advice, I will not give any to a child trying to have sex.



answers from Spartanburg on

tell her that this isn't something she MUST do to be appreciated. Ask her if she does it because her friends do it or because a boy asks her to. I BET she does not understand the meaning and the value of sex at her age. Tell her that sex without love will make her feel dirty and she may ruin her chance to enjoy it with the right person when she'll be older and ready for it. Finally, show her pictures found on the web about venereal diseases...it should suffice to keep her away from it. It could be traumatizing for a while, but she'll have all the time to get over it...for God's sake, sex at 13? We are in a crazy time. Good luck, good job intervening on this.



answers from Indianapolis on

I agree with everything that's been said, but if your daughter is rebelling, you need to maybe try something a little tougher. Try to find a group home that has teenage moms, see if they will let her talk to them.......I agree with showing her all the stats on pregnancy etc. but she will probably say she is different and it won't happen to her. Talk to a children center or somewhere that can help you find classes, or other teen girls that have done what she is doing and has paid the price for it. Hospitals might be able to help.

Good Luck! Take Care.

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