11 Month Old Throwing Self on the Floor After Being Told No

Updated on March 11, 2010
D.P. asks from Hamilton, OH
18 answers

my 11 month old daughter has been throwing her self on the floor when we tell her no, or move her away from the tv or computer. she pushes the buttons and goes after wires ive tried baby gates they dont fit our set up to fit infront of the tv or computer. then once shes told no she will scream and scream. until she eathire gives up or trys to get something else that she dont need to be playin in she has toys and we do try to interact with her as much as we can, we live in an apartment on the third floor i'm is scared to death if we let her cry it out somewone will contact child welfare thinking the worst that we're abusing her or negleting her whats should i do?

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answers from Pittsburgh on

Pop her in her pack & play or crib til her fit is over. You need to ignore these fits. It's a normal phase. Careful she doesn't train you to give in to her behavior!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Cincinnati on

Have you tried putting her in a playpen if she's bad? That will keep her away from things. I also believe in spankings.

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answers from Missoula on

Don't worry about child services being called. If they get called, they will come in and see that your child is perfectly happy and is not neglected or beaten. You should never give into your child's screaming and tantrums. If you do, you are teaching them that that's how to get their way. You will not have a happy home if you let this happen. You should buy the Supernanny book. It has a great "naughty chair technique". My son did the same things and I was skeptical about this approach at first. But when I tried it, I saw changes right away. Don't lose your temper or show your child that you are getting angry when she does this. They are too smart and she will only react to how you react.

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answers from Cincinnati on

best thing to do is ignore her behavior - it is normal to throw temper tantrums. Let her cry and step over/around her, “walk away” (as long as she is safe). She will only feed into your reactions of trying to quiet her with more negative behaviors (since she is getting attention). Do you know your neighbors? Can you talk to the neighbors to let them know she is at the age where se is throwing temper tantrums?

As someone who used to live in an apartment complex - if I heard a lot of screaming/yelling - I would put my ear up to the wall to make sure everyone was safe. as long as it sounding like typical parenting I did nothing. The one time I called the police is when the neighbors were slamming doors, yelling (I think the guy was drunk) and the woman said to the guy "I can't breathe". Needless to say I called 911 right away.

So as long as you aren't yelling/screaming/throwing things at her I’d think you should be fine.



answers from Dayton on

Let the neighbors think what they will. If they have half a brain, then they will know what toddlers are like. As for your daughter, ignore her fits and be consistant in keeping her out of things she's not supposed to play with or around. It will take patience, but she will eventually figure out that she's not going to win and throwing fits don't help.



answers from Portland on

Since you know the times and places she's likely to have these events, be prepared. Block wires and outlets so she can't get to them. Unplug devices when you're not using them, and keep the wires up out of the way. And when she tries to get to the TV or computer while they are in use, keep a favorite toy or two nearby so you can distract her with a different, or even new, activity.

If you wait until she's screaming or you're upset, you've waited too long to be involved in her exploration. Act earlier, and you can often keep parenting problems from occurring in the first place.



answers from Columbus on

lol...i don't mean to laugh but my son does the same thing! it started around 11 months. he's 15 months now and doesn't do it every time, moreso when he's tired. we just let him throw his tantrum, try not to react to it and then try to distract him with something else that he can play with. good luck! :)



answers from Portland on

At this age babies still lose control of their body when they get upset, so if she's throwing herself on the floor or flailing around, try to comfort her because in the long run it will help her to feel more secure and safe with you.
Other than that, there isn't much you can do when a baby throws a tantrum. Its just part of the phase they're in. Just keep doing what you're doing- explaining WHY you are saying no is a big part of it.
Good job!


answers from San Antonio on

turn the computer off, tv off. Unplug it if you have to. Even move it into a different room so you can close the door. They also sell entertainment systems so that the TV could be up higher than she can reach. Sounds like she'd try to climb up the entertainment center, so if you go that route, make sure nothing could fall on top of her!

I think putting her in a safe time-out area (packnplay, crib) and not giving her attention till she calms down is a great idea. Hopefully she'll learn quickly that she can't throw tantrums like that.

Good luck


answers from Dallas on

I am having the same problem! My son is 13 months old and he throws tantrums in public places. The other day I carried him into Blockbuster and he screamed and pushed me to get down. Everyone looked at me like I was beating him. He is always so good with my husband but acts up with me. I wish I knew why or what I could do.



answers from Jacksonville on


Let Abbey cry it out in a safe place, (crib, playpen,pack n play) and tell her no, and state what the no no is , before you place her in .
Don't worry about child services over her screaming ,hopefully you 'll break her of this before they ever come (and they have no reason to believe anything else is going on) . This is gonna sound cruel, but, but it does work, when you've tried being patient with her and the crying continues for an unreasonable amt of time, you can use a spray bottle ,fill it with water and give her a little spray . Usually it startles them just enough to make them stop. It's not harmful to them in any way ,it just gets their attention.
If you don't do something, these will turn into regular temper tantrums when they don't get their way. When she's old enough ,another yr or two, use the time out chair.
Just make sure you do give her a place (and time)to get those little legs walking about,they really need the exercise and practice. Give her some pots and pans ,kitchen utensils to play with to distract her.
Best of luck, CS



answers from Orlando on

People don't call child services from a child crying, and chld services won't come out because someone says they hear a child having a tantrum. Worse case scenerio is they come out and see that you have a perfectly healthy child who is testing her mom and dad by having tantrums. Do NOT give in to tantrums just to quiet her down or you will turn her into a monster in no time time at all because you will be teaching her that the louder she cries the faster she gets what she wants. When my son screams, he gets put in his room. It's not time out because we don't make him stay for a certain amount of time. As soon as he stops screaming, he can join the rest of the family



answers from Provo on

First of all, she isn't too young to put her in her crib for one minute and let her cry. If you're worried about the neighbors, I would actually knock on doors and let people know what you are doing and what's going on before you start doing it so they know. Most people respect you for properly disciplining your children. It's hard when they are so young because you feel mean, but if she's old enough to understand "no", then she's old enough to understand why she's being put in her crib. As she gets older there is a great program I've been using with my two toddlers, it is located at www.oneweekparentingmiracle.com. It has helped me feel more confident in disciplining, I keep my cool a lot better, and there is a much more peaceful/positive feeling in our home. It's nice to have an idea of how to discipline before they get completely out of control. I wish I had had this resource when my daughter was 2, so I'm passing it on! Hope this helps you!




answers from Lakeland on

If you give attention when she is like this it will train her to do this all the time until she gets her way. Be calm put her in a safe place and let her get over it, no child service worker is going to come down on you for this.
You either train her or she will train you.



answers from Cincinnati on

That is normal. My 14 month old does the same thing. Try to ignore her. dont worry about the child welfare. This is a faze and she will get over it....but probably not for about 6 months. If you can try to get her into a different activity. My daughter LOVES to take walks. All the fresh air and being outside we can point to different things and she can learn about the trees etc. Plus that air helps her sleep better. She also loves to color so if she is in a bad mood, I put her in the tub (clothes on and no water) and let her color with the bath crayons.
good luck.



answers from Canton on

She is at a curious age but doesn't have all the verbals to say what she wants. I often use distraction. Hand her or get her engaged with other toys that she xan explore.
My daughter is almost 2 and this had mostly worked well for her. If she had something fascinating but ibappropriate we took it from her and replaced it with something more appropriate. Vsometimes ot takes a little effort to convince her but she inevidably becomes distracted



answers from Cleveland on

The more that you give in the more power her determination will gain. Temper tantrums are fairly common in children but parents need to stand up to challenge. I would suggest trying to find a cover for the computer and for the buttons on the TV just to put temptation out of sight. That will still not eliminate the problem of the fall out when you say no because ther may be other times you will have to say no. I was told by my pediatrition and then later in my teaching career to ignor as much as possible. Don't watch, find something else to do and let the child have the tantrum without any benefit including attention. I told my neighbors that we were working on this so that they would understand the crying and I in fact would sit on my steps in the summer so that they saw me and knew I was not killing my daughter. I started putting her in bed or in the high chair to protect her from hurting herself. I would always tell her that I would come get her when she was finished crying. I did the same kind of idea with a child in my preschool classroomwho had tantrums that would get all kinds of attention from the other children. I started taking her out of the room into an empty classroom and then let her cry. I stayed with her and pretended to read or do paper work so that I did not focus on her. I also told this child -when you are ready we can join the other children. The length of the tantrum would get shorter and then it eventually stopped. Patience and a strong will of your own will help. Never do we want to break a child's strong will but it has to be guided down the right path.



answers from San Diego on

I agree with what others have posted. You should put her someplace safe for her to have a tantrum and then walk away. We used our bed, because I didn't want our son to equate his crib with punishment. If we had a pack n play, I would have used that.

I also agree that you shouldn't give in to tantrums and screaming, because it teaches your child that it works. I think everyone understands that children have tantrums. Even if someone does call child protective services (which they probably won't), one look at your daughter will reassure them that she is fine.

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