10 Mos Old Without Paci

Updated on January 03, 2007
D.J. asks from Sacramento, CA
11 answers

Thursday night was the first night my son has had without his pacifier. He slept okay. He started out in his bed in his room. In the middle of the night he crawled into my room. He slept there the remainer of the night. The next night until last night he was awaken about every tow hours crying. I have given him a bottle.
I dont really know my question exactly. But I must be doing this wrong. All the readings I have read say this should only be happening a few nights.
I guess I need to put him to bed in his bed. If he wakes up redirect him back to his bed. I just have a problem with letting him cry for something he is uesd to pacifying him. What can I replace it with? Please give me some ideas, thoughts, rescues!!

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S.H.

answers from Las Vegas on

My first daughter, now 6 was very attached to her "sucker". At 11mo. we had a ceremony to end the sucker. We went around the house and found all of them....she had 3 or 4, we put them in the garbage together and made a big girl party out of it. We them took them out to the dumpster and I let her throw them in. Occasionally she would ask about them and I would reaffirm that she was a big girl now and that we had sent them away. It was a little difficult at first, but she always chose being a big girl over missing the pacifiers. Good luck!!

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S.L.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi D., I know that every one has there own opions but my daughter will be 3 in February and she loves a pacifier. It helps her fall asleep. We had gotten rid of all of them and one time she found a nipple from a bottle and started wanting "her" nipple. I don't know what's worse, having her cry when she doesn't get her pacifier or hearing her scream out in the store "I want my nipple"! Good luck!
Steph:)

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S.M.

answers from Chico on

Does it REALLY bother you that he comes to bed with you? If not, my advice: Forget the books..."they" don't love your baby as much as you do...and "they" aren't THERE.

Do what you think is right; what your heart tells you to do. My son was nine months old when he gave up his pacifier...but he still "wakes up" regularly crying in his sleep. I cannot bear to hear him cry so, I check on him and try to sooth him back to sleep...sometimes it works, other times; it doesn't. When it doesn't work...or I'm too darn tired to deal with it...I pick him up and bring him to bed with my husband and I. I'm told this is a bad practice...well, you know what - I don't care. :) He will only be this little for a short time and someday, he won't want me to snuggle with him...and I can guarantee you, he will NOT want to be sleeping with me and his dad when he's a teenager! :)

My best friend has three kids...and she made a good point when I was worried about his using the pacifier, eating at night, sleeping with us, etc...she said that "as long as it's not hurting him, don't worry about it. He won't take his blankie or pacifier to school with him...for long. At Preschool/Kindergarten, peer pressure can be a good thing". :)

Only you know your baby best...so, don't think of it as you are doing something "wrong"...as long as it doesn't bother you and your baby isn't suffering...you're doing fine.

Eventually, a)you will figure it out; b)your baby will figure it out, or c)you'll get to the end of your rope and you'll make the necessary changes to be able to survive. :)

Good luck and don't be so h*** o* yourself...just listen to your gut/heart.

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J.D.

answers from Spokane on

Medicaly, I would not recommend you break the pacifier before one year, doctors say 3 years. A pacifier is what keeps a child "sane" Not only that, but it is shown to reduce chances of teenage smoking and SIDS (although reasons are unknown)

Replacing a pacifier will make things worse if he is not ready for the break. He will need it for sleep, for uncomfortable situations and when out in public. If you "replace" the pacifier, all youare doing is "replacing" the type of security.

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K.O.

answers from Portland on

LOL. I have to admit, I am a pacifier believer. I used to suck my own thumb for too long of a time and it was something that helped me cope, but was definitely not solving any of my problems. I have actually forced my kids to be pacifier babies. My thinking was that it was easier to take away a pacifier than it was their own thumb.

ALL of my kids had their binkies until they were at least 2 years old. It did not hurt their teeth. I did not allow them to have it in their mouths when they were talking, etc. I even took the pacifier out of their mouths after they had fallen asleep.

10 months seems to be a very young age to have them not need to be pacified. I totally agree with ? below about your baby needing to still be in his crib. My 2 year old is still in her crib and we are just now switching to a bed. Only because she can climb out of it now. There is just way too many things that a baby can find on the floor or even wall sockets and stuff that are dangerous!

Oh, and yes...I would take him back to bed if this is how you choose to do it. I still say that it is terribly dangerous, but he should be sleeping in his own bed.

I laugh at that because I let my 2 year old sleep with me once in a while too. LOL. I do it for me...not her. I guess it is because she is my last of 6 children and I hate that they grow out of every stage so fast and before you know it, they are in college and then off and married. Ahhh!

Well, good luck! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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M.A.

answers from San Diego on

First of all, it sounds like your son is able to get out of his bed on his own, is that right? That's probably your first issue. I'm not trying to judge, but a 10 month old should probably still be in a crib unless there are special circumstances (like he can climb out on his own no matter what level the crib is on, which is dangerous). Babies just shouldn't be able to wander around during the night on their own. About the pacifier, I can't give you much advice on the paci as my 10 month old son still has his paci too! with my daughter, it was easy. she lost interest in it and used a stuffed animal as her security, she still needs her "fishy" to go to bed at 3. so maybe try a blanket, a favorite stuffed animal? some babies just take longer to let go of security items like pacifiers. You may have been told it will take a couple nights, but it might take longer. Just be consistent and stay firm if you are serious about taking it away. taking it away a few nights and then giving it back will just confuse him, make him more upset and harder to break him of it. Good luck, I know it's hard!

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T.W.

answers from Medford on

remember that babies are very oral they need to suck for comfort there is no reason to wean him from his paci yet I don't know who told you to wean him but remember there are alot of people out there with bad advice. they used to think that it was a bad idea for women to exercise during pregnancy and that it was a good idea to stay away from your baby for 24 hours so that they wouldn't be so attached and that you should wean by abandoning all this resulted in a lot of depressed people. but some how there are still alot of people who think this way and they usually have no prob. telling you that you are wrong so don't rush to make you son grow up just because people are telling you that you need too

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J.S.

answers from Honolulu on

D.,
Don't stress out!! My son is 16 months and I still let him use a paci at night or whenever he needs it due to his molars that are popping up. I was stressed out myself about when to give it up, I read somewhere that you should either take it away at 6 months before they really get attached or at 2 when you can talk to them and help them understand things. I think I will shoot for the two year mark. If he slept good before you took it away... give it back :) you need your slep

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A.R.

answers from Las Vegas on

Was your son sleeping well before you took away the pacifier? If so, why not let him keep it at night? My daughter used a pacifier when she would sleep until she was two. Then she was old enough that she could understand that big girls didn't need them, and she traded them in for a new toy. It is going to be a lot harder to break him of being dependent on you feeding him and letting him sleep with you in the night then to take away a pacifier later when you really need to.

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A.D.

answers from Portland on

Hi D.,

There's a method called "Pantley's Gentle Removal Plan" that I've heard works wonders getting babies weaned off the bottle, breast, or pacifier. It comes the Elizabeth Pantley's book "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" (a must-read, if you ask me!). Here's a link I found online that talks about it: http://babyparenting.about.com/od/sleeping/a/nightfeed_2.htm Here's also an example of the plan in action from the book, since this isn't included on the website article:

Baby is awake and sucking vigorously.
Baby's eyes close, and his sicking rate slows.
You gently remove the pacifier.
Baby roots (moving his open mouth to find the pacifier).
You try holding his chin closed, but he'll have none of that!
You replace the pacifier.
Count one thousand, two thousand...ten thousand.
You gently remove the pacifier.
Baby roots.
You try stalling, but no dice.
You put the pacifier back in his mouth.
Count one thousand, two thousand...ten thousand.
You gently remove the pacifier.
Baby roots.
You put the pacifier back in his mouth.
Count one thousand, two thousand...ten thousand.
You gently remove the pacifier.
Baby roots a little, and you gently hod his mouth closed.
Baby doesn't resist; he is nearly out.
You place baby in bed.
He goes to sleep.

That was the example in the book about this technique. You adjust the counting to meet your baby's needs, and the idea is to eventually be free of the pacifier. Check out the book or that link for a more detailed description.

Regards,
A.

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K.O.

answers from Portland on

I would practice going without the pacifier during nap time first. Once he gets used to that I would work on bed time. He's only 10 months old, I don't think you need to hurry the process along too much.

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