1 Yr Bonking His Head on the Floor on Purpose

Updated on September 30, 2008
A.L. asks from Kelso, WA
28 answers

Hi ladies,
My 1 yr old son suddenly decided that he wants to hit his head on the floor. It scares the heck out of me when he does it and it just started last week. Anyone experienced this w/ thier babies?

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K.H.

answers from Bellingham on

I apologize if I repeat anything others have said (I know sometimes it gets repetative) but my daughter used to do this and the doctor said it is because they are unable to communicate their feelings through words (because they don't know how to express it, and/or because they can't talk in full sentences) and so that's how they communicate. Good luck!!

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D.H.

answers from Spokane on

Yes it can be normal. My children never did it. Children that age don't have verbal skills to express what they need or want. they get frustrated a lot.

My concern would be an allergy to something. Food is most common. If he continues to do it for a long time I would think about that.

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T.C.

answers from Portland on

Ali,

My sons both headbutt. Have done so for a year...do not worry unless he keeps doing it more for attention or tantrums. I use pillows for them to throw and headbutt also to give the floor a break!!

good luck,
T.

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J.S.

answers from Portland on

VERY NORMAL! I took my son to the doctor for this and she said just to ignore it and this too shall pass :) I'm not sure why they do it but I am sure it has to do with cause and effect. Anyway, it was just a phase and he is a normal healthy boy who is almost 10 now!

The only time the doctor told me that I needed to step in and do something about it is if he starts REALLY banging his head hard. I would just try to distract him and help him to focus on something else. Just don't give him lots of attention for this or he will continue.

Best of luck!

~Jenn~

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K.K.

answers from Seattle on

I was initially reading to see if there were responses to help with my 21-month-old son as well...we have a similar situation where he has decided to hit himself in the head with his fist! Only on his skull (not his face), and doesn't leave a red mark or bruise or anything - but then if you say something like, "Oh honey, don't do that", he gets the giggles and continues it. It's gotten so that it's his ham-it-up activity to get us to notice him...I never know when it will come on or why. We actually could be in the middle of interacting with him when he's getting plenty of attention, and BAM! Head-thumping time! I figure it's just one way for him to non-verbally interact and in a very active way that gets a response. If he's giggling, he's not hurting himself (it just looks horrible and possibly painful). So I ignore it and try not to comment...if he has no audience and gets no reaction, there's no need to continue hitting himself!

I was glad to hear it seems natural, I was guessing so. Whew!

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F.R.

answers from Seattle on

Ali,

My son is 4 1/2 and still bonks his head out of frustration. Since he started this at about 1, he gives himself a pretty good bruise every other month or so. I asked his doctor about it; she said it is NORMAL and he'll grow out of it. She said to tell him "I know you're frustrated (or angry) but I don't want to see you hurt yourself. Tell me what's wrong and maybe I can help."

Like I said, he still does it, but it isn't as frequent. A 1 year old can't talk yet, so he can't tell you what's bothering him, but he can understand that you don't want him to hurt himself.

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S.C.

answers from Portland on

Ali,

I was horrified the first time my son did that, so I know how you feel. My son is 14 months old and when he gets mad he flops around and bangs into just about anything. I figure that he really has so much emotion for such a little body that he has to let it out some how. I just try to keep him from banging into something that might hurt him (it just seems to make him madder). I am 8 months pregnant and can't really hold him while he flops and bangs about. So I just sit next to him on the floor and rub his back, sing or talk quietly. Usually within a few minutes he stands up and crawls into my lap for a hug.

I hope this helps to know that other mothers are experiencing the same thing. It is such an adventure raising an energetic little man, isn't it!!

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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

My oldest did it, and I've heard of other kids doing it too. I don't remember how long she did it but she never actually hurt herself!

1 mom found this helpful

M.B.

answers from Seattle on

Ali,

Ever see the old school cartoons of Wile E. Coyote? The ones where he doesn't fall until he realizes that he's not on the cliff anymore? Yeah, that was my son when he was around a year old, and his cliff was the couch. It was absolutely hilarious once we realized he thought it was a game. He's now almost 5 and is fine.

My daughter is 18 months and will bonk the back of her head on any solid surface, or she'll bounce up and down on her kid sized chairs. She's just as hilarious as my son was.

I think it's about them figuring out what their bodies do, and just learning about their bodies. As long as his behavior doesn't change dramatically I wouldn't worry about it too much. It's a rather disturbing (to us) exploration.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

1 mom found this helpful
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B.D.

answers from Seattle on

I went through this same exact thing with my son. Scared the bejeebers outta me! One time, we were at his grandparents and he slammed his head into the linoleum floor. He pops up with this humongous egg sized lump on his forehead. I thought I would die right there from fright. The only thing I can say is just keep an eye out for him. My son did it to get attention whenever he didn't get anything he wanted. I noticed if I paid attention to him, that he would continue to do it. I would just make sure that he stays clear of anything that could injure him and should he hit his head as hard as my son has, I would be sure to check for the usual signs of head trauma...lethargic behavior, no lump, fever, bleeding out of any open area...etc. As a mom, you know what is right with your child and what isn't. :D Hope this helps! Good luck!

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K.L.

answers from Seattle on

My son did the same thing. Try and give him something else to play with. It is a phase and it will go away in a few months. Try to ignore it as much as possible. I know it is hard to watch him do this to himself but it is a phase and the less attetion paid to it the sooner it wont be fun for him to do. Good luck

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C.A.

answers from Portland on

Hi Ali~

Believe it or not he will figure it out and get over it. Both of my kiddos did it, much to my bewilderment (hello!!! OUCH). Right now he's probably not hitting his head very hard at all. He will get brave, bonk it hard, and cry. Unitl then there's nothing you can do about it. BUT when this does happen (as it most assuredly will) comfort him, but do not say it is ok!! Tell him "See honey, this is why mommy said no and owie". He may try it a few more times, but it will die off after that. My daughter got a pretty good whack in that ended her bouts. My son is autistic and it took quite awhile with him due to pain threshhold. Rest assured it will end, and until then there's not much you can do.

C.

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A.M.

answers from Seattle on

My 14 month old daughter was doing this a few months ago when tired or frustrated. My first reaction was to say " no don't do that" and then pick her up. When I read more about it,it is very common and the head banging action is actually soothing for them- even though it looks painful. The recommendation is to ignore the action and doing this really helped for us. I found that finding a distraction really helped her too. It's really hard to watch, but giving them attention when they do this seems to encourage the action. Good luck. It's probably just a phase too.

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L.R.

answers from Seattle on

Hi Ali,
Both my darlings did it. I was horrified too when my son (about the same age) did it and asked the doctor - he said it is common in most kids. Just a way to express since they dont talk much. My daughter turned 1 just a few months ago and she did it too, sometimes still does but she is learning that it hurts enough to not want to. I try to ignore it (unless she bonks too hard and the tears begin). Not giving the attention to it worked with my son and seems to be with my daughter. It is a hard phase to go thru, seeing them hurt themselves. You can try to divert his attention when he starts doing that by enticing him with a toy that you two can play with. I just walk over to the toys and pull out a book or toy and call her name. If she isn't wrapped up in her own emotions, she will see that I want to play and come on over like nothing happened.

It is hard to see your child hurting themselves and hard not to give it the attention but try not to if you can and it will go away. Good luck to you!

L.

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R.C.

answers from Seattle on

The experts says its totally normal and in time it will pass. They also say that you should let them do it as long as they are not hurting themselves badly. Most children will not do it hard enough to cause any real damage. I know it's hard to just sit back and let them do it but the less reaction you have the sooner it will pass. Stay strong and good luck to you! :-)

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D.R.

answers from Portland on

both of my children have made this a regular practice at one point or another. from my experience it is only a phase. it lasted a short while with each and then, i think when they realized that it was not achieving anything but a sore head, they each quit. every once in a while in a wild fit either of them might try it again, but with a little goose egg once again they promptly stop. in my opinion it is nothing to fret about.

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D.R.

answers from Portland on

my son did this at the same age. I asked his ped about it and he said that my son would stop if it really hurt. He did stop, the phase did not last long and he never really got hurt. You could try to redirect him, get his interest in something else. Good luck

D.J.

answers from Seattle on

Hi Ali! This is very normal. My son never did it but I know many kids that did. There is even a "word" for that, they call them "rock and roll" babies. As long as I remember from the Parents Education Class the advice was to buy them the first drums or to give them pots and pans, so they can "play" the rhythm they need to "hear". You can also play some real "rock and roll" music for them instead of "twinkle, twinkle, little star" and show them how to "get" the rhythm out of it like stomping your feet, banging on the floor with wooden spoons, dance and etc. Hey, you might even have some fun too doing it! From what I remember it has something to do with the brain development and it will go away in few month. Just let him "bang" something else instead of his head, just sit down with him and show him how to do it! Hope I was helpful. Good luck!

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L.G.

answers from Seattle on

This is normal for one-year-olds. I have a daycare in my home, and used to work exclusively with toddlers for many years,and infants and toddlers are my specific field of study. I have seen many toddlers exhibit this somewhat bizarre behavior. It is a way of giving their bodies feedback. Toddlers are also completely fascinated by cause and effect. So, what looks like completely crazy behavior to adults is simply a matter of the child thinking, "Wow! When I bump my head against the floor, I feel it on my head! I think I'll do it again!" If the adults standing nearby respond with looks of horror and plead with the child not to do it anymore, well, now the cause and effect is even MORE satisfying! "I can feel this against my head AND freak out Mom, Dad, Grandma, and any other adult nearby! This is so cool! I think I'll try this again!"
Now, I should also give you a disclaimer that if you see this behavior becoming obsessive or lasting for months, you may wish to consult with your pediatrician. There are some children who use such methods for bodily feedback because they have some form of sensory disorder, and repetitive motions can also be a symptom of certain disorders. Having said all of that, most toddlers are ALL about sensory experiences and repetition! When I would be concerned is if he seems to be doing this compulsively for many months, or if this is still going on into his preschool years. It sounds as though you just have a really fun and active little guy who has found a way to get a really enjoyable (for him) response from Mom. Blessings to You and Yours! :)

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M.L.

answers from Seattle on

It's the wall for us! She does it regularly even on the brick fireplace surround. We asked the pediatrician and she said it's really normal, nothing to worry about. Just make sure if it starts to swell that you put an ice pack/peas.

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T.R.

answers from Portland on

I have worked with MANY MANY infant to 18 month old children in the past for nearly 6 years... so we are talkin' around 60 kids.... It is very common for boys to do it more then girls. I have taken class upon class about it... Most of the time it is because they are teething... they can not control the pain. By bonking their head against something gives them control over the pain they feel.. how hard = how much pain as well as taking the pain away from their mouth... I would suggest giving him some teething tablets.. they are a LIFE SAVER!!!! see if that helps. In my experience they stop shortly after they stop teething.

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J.C.

answers from Seattle on

This is not unusual -- try not to over react - that will only reinforce your sweet boy. Made sure there are opportunities for him to jump - bounce - get his body moving in less alarming ways. If you live close to the Lake City area of Seattle - my church is selling ( DIRT cheap) outside toys includig two really nice ''wonder horse'' bouncing toys - come on by St George Episcopal --- I'm talking DIRT cheap and great condition. ( the new director of our pre-school wants a different type out outdoor toys - so we are selling off some fabulous donations)

Blessings,
Old Mom - aka J.

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M.B.

answers from Portland on

My now 3 year old id that it scared me too bu she stopped and is fine

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G.H.

answers from Richland on

Wow, I read the responses, and I have to say, I'd never heard of it before. But, if it is a way to communicate, I would try teaching him Baby Signs. I taught my son how to sign when he couldn't talk (he would scream when he wanted something), and it worked right away. Good luck!

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N.L.

answers from Portland on

Hi Ali,

Have no fear, this is totally normal behavior! If you check out www.babycenter.com it goes into detail about how this is normal for boys and that boys are 3 times a likely to do this than girls.

If your really worried about it, call your pedi and ask them, I had to call for my 9 month old about her shaking her head side to side and was told that this is very normal at this stage. Was also told if the shaking was jerky or if she lost consciousness that i should bring her in right away.

Hope that helps!

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J.G.

answers from Anchorage on

Your little guy could have some sensory issues. I had 2 boys out of five children.. and both did this. #5 even more so that the older boy. I highly recommend the book "The Out of Sync Child" by Carol Stock-Kranowitz. Some kids will do "weird" things in order to get certain sensory input they crave. Another example my youngest does is to drag his head on the carpet. He is constantly jumping off of things - esp. furniture. There are things you can do with your child to help him get certain sensory input without harming himself - the book I mentioned is a great place to start. It also has a companion book called the OUt of Sync Child Has Fun.

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C.P.

answers from Portland on

Our grandson did it for awhile and I looked it up on the internet. It is common for kids who aren't talking enough yet to express their frustration and it passes after a few months. It's kind of way to soothe themselves which seems weird, but it is common.

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C.R.

answers from Seattle on

Hi Ali,

Unfortunately, my son is doing it too. It also started when he was around 1 year old. He's now 18 months and still at it, although it has lessoned some. I have talked to his pediatrician and she assures me this is quite normal in boys. They are looking for attention and that is a sure way to get some. I used to run to my son every time. Now, even though it is terribly hard, I ignore him, totally and completely. My husband does the same and it has worked. The head banging has lessoned and is much shorter in the span of his tantrums.

For us it is now becoming the symptom of him not being able to express himself verbally. He knows what he wants but doesn't have the words to express it.

Good luck with your son and know that it is not life threatening, it does not mean he's some how mentally deficient or any of the other terrible things you've no doubt been wondering about.

Chin up!! This too will pass. :-)

C.

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