1 Year Old Mini Tantrums

Updated on November 22, 2011
M.K. asks from Frisco, TX
8 answers

Hello! once again I call upon my more experienced Mom friends to help me out here. My little 1 year old is very sweet and loving but he is also very wilfull - knows exactly what he wants. Prevously if he was doing something he wasn't supposed to do (like not letting me close the refrigerator door because he wants to explore) I would just pick him and distract him with something else and he would forget about the other thing. Now, for the past couple of weeks, when I pick him he totally looses it starts crying, kicking his legs in the air and it takes a little bit more effort to distract him. My Mom says it is normal "boy"behavior...is that true?? should I be doing something so that he doesn't become the child that throws himself on the ground in the mall - or is this just a part of raising a boy??? I know that I do try and distract him with something else but I am not entirely sure what the nanny does during the day - I will find out but want to coach her as well on how to effectively handle such situations.......
Your contructive input is greatly appreciated!

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So What Happened?

You guys are awesome! I have been doing the exact oppoiste too much attention during tantrum. I will certainly be watching happiest toddler on the block tonight. I did read happiest baby on the block and the 5 Ss helped so much!!!!! thanks!!!!

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

Pretty normal boy or girl behavior. It's his job at this age to explore – it's a compulsion for many littles. Here's a video of Dr. Harvey Karp's technique for getting on the child's wavelength. Once they know you really understand what they want, it's often easier for them to deal with the disappointment of not getting it, and the tantrum is often averted. This is a great technique; it has worked well with my grandson, and I get great reports from other parents who have tried it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJ1428uYs2g&NR=1&a....

4 moms found this helpful

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J.D.

answers from Cincinnati on

I would move him away from the fridge, shut the door and then put him down and walk away without saying anything. When he calms down let him know why you didn't like his behavior. He will probably throw some huge tantrum in some store and don't worry about other people think. You will always have those nosy nellies there. It will give you something to laugh about later.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

When he starts crying and kicking his legs, get him out of the way of the door (if you're trying to shut the frig) and put him down on the floor and simply walk away. No talking; no explanation, just walk away. When he's calm, let him know that you will not deal with him when he's throwing a fit and that he can come and talk to you when he's done. Let him know you love him, but when he acts like that he don't really like him. Tell him that behavior makes him ugly, but when he behaves, he's beautiful. Beauty comes from inside and how he acts. If he wants people to see the beautiful boy you know he can be, he needs to behave himself.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.P.

answers from Portland on

Tantrums are an attempt to get what he wants. It's attention getting. The way to stop the tantrums is to completely ignore him when he's tantruming. Put him in a safe place and walk away. Be matter of fact. Tell him you know he's angry and you'll pay attention when he's calm. Then ignore him. Don't try to talk him into being calm. It doesn't work and gets him the attention that he wants.

When he's thru, give him a hug. You don't need to "teach" him about the tantrum. He'll learn that you won't respond with repetition. If he understands words you can tell him that you know he was angry and suggest what he can do instead of throwing a tantrum. Tho, I suggest he's too young to understand.

You have to always ignore tantrums. If you don't baby will throw a tantrum to see if this time you'll give in.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.G.

answers from Tampa on

I do want to respond about the throwing a tantrum out in public.
My 2 and a half year old has done this a few times although I always ignore them at home.
I am now finding out she may have a sensory disorder.
So, for all the ones who think toddlers throw fits because they are not being disciplined properly in some cases it just isn't the case.
She has the meltdowns when something she is expecting to happen don't happen for example we had to use a different door to pick up her older brother from school.
She threw a HUGE tantrum right there in the hall and it was so embarassing.
I am sure hoping once she starts getting therapy she will be easier to deal with.
Or I can figure out what to do to avoid her tantrums since they are out of the norm.
But, I got many sour looks even from teachers that just made me feel terrible.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.K.

answers from New York on

Just remove and distract him. That is the only thing you can do at this age.
Welcome to a toddlers world!

1 mom found this helpful

M.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

I am curious at the answers you will get, I have a 1 year old boy as well. Sweet as honey, but terrible tantrums if he doesnt get what he wants. He has 2 older sisters, and he is constantly after them, pinching, and taking things away. If I say NO sternly, is face contorts and he lets out a wail that would wake the dead, If I take his hand and put him in his play room, he kicks, bucks, writhes, screams, hits, slaps, gnashes his teeth and then lays still and screams. Its a real interesting thing he does but its terrifying me what he will do in public. He is way to young for anything like time out so I havent a clue. When he is like this he can not be re-directed. I do try to give him a noisy toy or sing for him but its of no use. I was also told this is a boy thing. YIKES

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N.M.

answers from Dallas on

I'm not sure it's fair to call this a "boy" thing. I have 3 boys, and the oldest two (now ages 7 and 4) never went through anything like this. My youngest is 19 months, and he's been having these tantrums since he was around 11 months old. I'm SO tired of them! We're trying to ignore them too (and when we do, if we're nearby, he tries to bite or hit us), and I've got to say, if he had been my first, he might have been my last as well! :-) But most of the best advice I've gotten on my "strong-willed toddler" has come from friends who have daughters who acted this way at the same age. I think it's just a personality thing, not a gender thing.

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