Some nights are extremely difficult for my one year old son, Cole. He's never been a great sleeper, and he only occasionally sleeps through the night. Generally, he will sleep from 9:30pm - 1:30am. I'll offer him some milk, then hold him until he falls asleep again. Then he might be up again one more time, or he might sleep the rest of the night. But lately there is the occasional night that he will not settle down when he gets up for the first time. He'll cry and scream. He'll throw his arms and head back, arching himself backward, making it nearly impossible to hold him. If I lay him in his crib, he continues his fit, rolls around kicking his legs and getting his legs stuck between the crib railings (he has some bruises on his legs from this), or stand up and scream. We've never been 'cry-it-out' parents and don't plan to take that route. But I put him in his crib to show him I won't hold him if he is throwing himself backwards. However, I also don't want to use putting him in his crib as a punishment because I don't want him to associate it as a bad place. When he has these fits, I expect that he would eventually wear himself out and fall asleep again because he never really even opens his eyes. But he never really does exhaust himself to fall asleep again. I end up forcing him to wake up - bring him into the living room, turn on the tv, distract him to quiet him down. On these nights, he's generally up until around 4:30am before he falls asleep, but even then I can't lay him down in his crib because his fit will start all over. I'll hold him in our recliner and sleep with him there. The first time this happened was a couple months ago when he had a fever. But it's been more frequent lately. I can't figure there is anything wrong (fever, discomfort, etc.). He may be teething (he has eight front teeth, I think a moler is next). I used to think it was his way of telling me he was upset that I wasn't nursing at night anymore, because we stopped nursing about 3 weeks ago. But he doesn't do this every night. He had this fit twice this past week, and I think, one time last week. He turned 1 year old the end of Jan, and somebody suggested maybe he was having growing pains. Has anybody else encountered this, or have any ideas what he might be going through and how to deal with it?? THANK YOU!!
~J.
Thanks for all the input!! Just a quick edit because of some of the responses: Cole's fever was due to roseola. We did take him to the doc when he had the fever, and was checked for an ear infection but didn't have one. A lot of responses suggested night terrors - something I've never thought about, so thank you all for bringing that possibility up. But last night, his whole fit episode started even before he went to bed for the first time. After a while of trying to hold him and calm him, I brought him into the living room and put him on the floor, basically to give him a chance to calm himself down. He just CRIED and cried and cried! So unusual for him to act this way! I sat on the floor to be near him, but he really didn't even want my comfor. Could he be afraid of sleep at night? After an hour or so, I took him for a car ride and he fell asleep instantly. After driving for 10 minutes or so, my husband got him into bed, and he had an otherwise 'normal' night.
Sounds like night terrors to me. My daughter went through this. It's so hard to watch but that's about all you can do. He'll grow out of it, hopefully sooner then later. If it helps, they usually have no memory of the event.
He sounds like he's having night-terrors.
Look it up online.
It is a developmental based development.
Normal.
Crops up at about this age.
Or sometimes it can be an ear infection.
Doe he nap during the day? Over-tired kids have a harder time sleeping at night, and wake more.
Just another interesting thing: my friend, when her child was a baby, would cry and cry at night all the time. Not sleeping well. She took her baby to the Doctor. The Doctor looked over the baby real well from head to toe. It was found, that a blond hair (barely visible to the eye), was wrapped tightly around her baby's toe... and it was actually cutting into the skin, all tangled around the toe. The Doctor removed the hair, which was not easy because it was tangle and wrapped around the toe so tightly and was probably getting tighter as the baby was growing. Once the hair was removed, her baby was like a new baby... happier to say the least and not crying all the time.
All the best,
Susan
My son had night terrors from 18months until 3 1/2. Now that he can talk more, he's told me that he has dreams of me disappearing (I work almost every day while my husband stays home with the kids). Now that we can talk about it, the nightmares have stopped. But I spent two years trying to calm down a screaming irrational toddler every night, and I'm glad it's over.
Oh, yeah, make sure you have a nightlight! I didn't believe in them, and it didn't make much difference, but I'm sure waking up in pitch black didn't help him manage.
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Take this note and your son to the doctor. The connection between the fever and the fits is concerning and the doctor can only tell you if it is something to be worried about.
Our son started this at 9 months. Every hour he would wake up screaming and doing the things you described. Our pediatrician recommended putting him to be earlier (like 6) which we thought was crazy until it worked.. the first night! He had been over tired which was screwing up his sleep cycle. He's now a great sleeper - 12 hours a night. It seemed counter-intuitive to us but it has been amazing. Now when we put him to bed, he grabs his snuggly and falls asleep. There are no more crying sessions or crazy fits.
If you saying that his eyes are closed he could be having night terrors. If that is the case you should just make sure he is safe but let him stay in his crib and wake on his own. If you could pat his back or rub his head but I don't think you are supposed to wake them up. I would check with the doctor also since you said he had a fever he could have an ear infection or something else going on. Have you tried giving him some tylenol before bed so if it is pain it can help him get some rest. Either way I would talk to the doctor about night terrors and the best way to handle them. My son would have them once in a while but not every night. Most times I would just go in comfort him and he would go right back to sleep.
Just a couple possibilities of what can be going on:
ear infection-has he had a cold recently? it hurts to lay down with one
growing pains (are his knees hurting him?)
teething- tylenol is okay to give him
is he learning to crawl or walk or talk? those disturb sleep
night terrors? (my daughter had these starting at about 22 months- they are disturbing to experience for the parents, but kids don't remember them. if he's screaming but still asleep, it's probably this. does it get worse when you touch him?)
how's he napping? that impacts overnight sleep too
try having your husband take the night shift for a couple days and see what happens. if it's about overnight milk, he'll respond differently to your husband.
Hello,
It may be night terrors if he appears to be asleep through the whole fit. My son has had night terrors for over a year (he is 22 mo). I expect night terrors after an exhausting day. He has a different cry and he does flail. I used to take him out of his crib or bed and rock him, but I am 8 months pregnant and can't do that anymore. He had them a couple of weeks ago, and now he is in a regular bed so I just stood by and rubbed his back till he calmed down. Every night is a lot, you may want to ask your pediatrician about gas or reflux. My son has also dealt with reflux off and on since birth. It can be very painful and there is a lot of arching of the back. We usually end up sleeping in a recliner cause he instantly feels better when he is sitting up. Your ped. can check into that and offer other suggestions as well as meds and foods to avoid. Hope your little guy feels better and you both start having better nights.
-V.
You know your son the best. When you said it may be teething, you're probably right on the mark. His 1 year molars are probably pushing there way up. I was always a soother myself. I can't let a baby cry it out. Baby Ambesol or Orajel may help. I also gave my 3 girls gripe water to get through the rough spells. The 1 with some alcohol in it worked best. Don't worry, he won't become a drunk off it.
He may just need your reassurance sometimes. He's getting way more independent and prone to falls. It could be bad dreams or memory of a spill. He could also be missing your loving touch. He's off playing hard all day and not in your arms as much. Give him loving touches throughout the day and let him play to wear him out more closer to bedtime.
He may have an ear infection. When my daughter had some nights like that it turned out it was an ear infection.
He may well be upset that you stopped nursing him at night, and also that you are not holding him at night. From what you said, it doesn't really sound like night terrors. I would suggest cosleeping and nursing him back to sleep. He's still a baby and still needs you at night. Or maybe starting out at night with him in his crib, only if he will go to sleep peacefully there, and then bring him into your bed when he wakes up the first time. Or put your mattress on the floor, and his mattress on the floor right next to it, and nurse or soothe him back to sleep in his bed, then roll into yours.
I'm thinking possible reflux. try elevating head of crib by 2-4" by putting blocks under feet & see if it stops. Otherwise not sure. just know that habits you sart now will be hard to stop later. best of luck
