Building a Strong Family: On the Road with The Great Gallon Give

Recently, I was given a great opportunity to go on the road with the National Milk Mustache got milk?"® Campaign as part of the "Great Gallon Give effort (the goal of which raise awareness of the important role milk plays in building strong families by endeavoring to give away 200,000 gallons of milk – almost three million servings – to moms across America). My role? Crack jokes (natch), hang out with some amazing moms and talk about what goes into building a strong family – beyond putting milk on the table.

I met so many great families in such a short period of time. I really enjoyed sharing the joys and challenges of motherhood and felt connected and inspired by all these women who want to do the same thing: build strong, happy, incredible families.

Realizing that not every mom gets to hit the road in search of insight and support, I want to share some tips that resulted from these conversations. I thought about them in the context of my work as an author and comedian – and then added in 20+ years of experience as a mom. Here are some thoughts…

First of all, strong families are made of strong family members
Building a strong family is a continual process – one that can change as the dynamics of your family change. But, like nutrients, there are some fundamental daily requirements that help create a healthy, strong and nurturing environment.

• Seek balance in your family life… and in your family’s diet
  Please note that the advice here is to “seek balance,” since no family has actually ever really found it. The notion that you can somehow “achieve balance” is mythological and should be treated with the likelihood of a unicorn sighting.

That said, seeking nutritional balance is a little bit easier, particularly when milk is on the table. Milk is one of those things that make our jobs as moms a tad easier because it’s full of so many nutrients that are important to help grow strong, healthy kids. Pouring it at every meal makes each meal a little more nutritionally rich and balanced – and it takes some of the stress of making healthy meals away.

• Manage Stress
  Speaking of stress, motherhood is the toughest, most rewarding, job out there – the definition of which is “responsibility without control.” The ability to deal positively with stress is one of our most difficult challenges, but also how we teach our families to deal with theirs. In the middle of it all, it’s good to do a quick inventory of what will matter in 10 minutes, 10 days, 10 months or 10 years. Maybe that’s why I love yoga – because it involves stretching! And breathing! So, relax. Take a Pilates class, where the first instruction is “lay down.”

• Help your family set individual and group goals
  Goals help kids know that we can set a desired outcome and move toward it. They help to create a sense of expectancy, motivation, achievement, persistence and measurable success. A family goal can also create an environment of cooperation toward a common cause – and they don’t have to be lofty “create-world-peace”-type family goals (that one seems to already be taken by the Jolie/Pitt household, anyway).

To start, try making a fitness goal with your family, like taking a walk after dinner every night. Making physical activity part of your family time – and your shared goals – will also make for a stronger family.

• Create lasting memories
  We all would love to create the beautiful, hazy, slo-mo kind of memories with our families, but real life is rarely like that. The picnic in the freshly mown field normally involves mosquitoes and ants. Making “together time” a daily ritual (say, around family dinner) is an easy way to make room for memories to emerge. Even when your family has less-than-stellar moments, you’ll still be providing your kids something to joke with one another about down the road.

• Know your family strengths
  All families are unique. It’s up to us to recognize that, although we can encourage our kids to be involved in a variety of activities, our families have unique characteristics. If you’re an outdoorsy family – be it! If your family is basically a Geek Squad, embrace that! Know your family strengths and milk it.

• Establish order and embrace a little chaos
  As mothers, we mostly want a well-ordered world and a well-oiled family machine. This is a pipe dream. Lighten up – of course life is important and we all deal with difficulties. But really, as moms, when the image of our face pops up in our kid’s mind, what is the face we want them to see? Frowning? Stressed out? Constantly frazzled? Or is it a loving, laughing look?

You can establish many management principles and scheduling systems and nothing will stop the inevitable breakfast table, schedule-busting announcement of, “Mom, I need a pirate costume for the school play this afternoon.” In those moments, flexibility is the virtue to reach for.

• Communicate well
  This seems like a given, but great communication involves a lot of listening – which is something moms want kids to do, but sometimes we are so busy that we don’t r-e-a-l-l-y listen to our kids. There are a lot of messages exchanged every day with our kids that we may be missing. So, I encourage you to put down the cell phone, close your laptop, pour a glass of milk and get back to having a good old family conversation.

Again, this was a really inspiring, cool effort to be a part of – and you can join in, if you want! You can help build strong families by getting families the nutrients they need. Visit facebook.com/Milkmustache and pass a virtual gallon of milk to your friends. For every virtual gallon passed, $1 will go to Feeding America to help families in need.

Editor’s Note This post was sponsored by the Milk Processor Education Program.