Photo by: Andriux-uk

A Little Pregnant?

Photo by: Andriux-uk

Practically everyone, I’m sure, has heard of Kelly Bottom, the 32-year-old Harrodsburg, Kentucky woman who last month gave birth in her home not knowing she was pregnant. I repeat: NOT KNOWING SHE WAS PREGNANT. For the life of me, I cannot imagine her surprise. Nor can I wrap my mind around the absurdity of such a notion. Translation: I am incapable of envisioning any living creature—save a house plant—claiming to be genuinely unaware of the presence of a 19-inch, 6-pound 15-ounce writhing entity wedged anywhere within. Truly, how does one miss that kind of memo?

Admittedly, I have frequented the Land of Oblivion on numerous occasions, but apparently this woman receives her mail there. Looking back on both of my pregnancies and considering the great multitude of words I could choose to describe them, I’d have to say they were memorable if nothing else. Granted, my most recent one—having resulted in twins with a combined weight of nearly 10 pounds—was perhaps BEYOND MEMORABLE; however I very seriously doubt I could ever fail to notice I was expecting.

More specifically, from Day One every fiber of my being felt pregnant. From my nose to my toes, from my fickle mood to my muddled thoughts, something was decidedly different. Maybe it was my voracious appetite and the fact that I made impossible demands of my husband—for black raspberry milkshakes and filet mignon mostly. In addition, I devoured cottage cheese by the tubful and drove the poor man to distraction with my incessant (and sometimes hostile) pleas for the curdy wonder. “Pull the van over NOW!” I once insisted in a sleepy little town that thankfully had a mom and pop grocery store, wedged amid a cluster of row homes. “GET ME SOME COTTAGE CHEESE BEFORE I DIE!” I ordered. The weirdish cravings alone (and especially when they were coupled with bouts of belligerence) would have served as a little red flag regarding the very real possibility of pregnancy, methinks.

Another obvious sign had to have been my intolerably acute sense of smell which caused me to retch if I happened to breeze by anyone who had given up deodorant for Lent (read: pretty much anything off the Putrid Scale made me retch). Moreover, my body was a raging inferno day and night—even in the dead of winter. Furthermore, I spent an inordinate amount of time and energy dwelling on this fact, not to mention my aching feet, breasts and back—wishing like crazy said horribleness would leave me and instead torment some other wretched soul on the planet. Worse yet, I couldn’t sleep comfortably no matter how many pillows I jammed beneath my ever-expanding belly—the unwieldy mass of flesh I clutched and cradled with every toss and turn as if it were some sort of monstrous growth, separate from myself, that I had to hoist with my hands in order to move anywhere. Perhaps this was an even MORE apparent sign of impending parenthood.

Indeed, in the nothing-will-fit-me-but-a-circus-tent stage of my pregnancy, my enormity became difficult to ignore. It was as if I had swallowed the Dominican Republic whole, but only because the panhandle of Texas was unavailable. Not surprisingly, I couldn’t tie my own shoes nor could I see my feet, which I found profoundly disturbing and yet, strangely amusing. Then I happened upon the day (which will forever live in infamy) during which I couldn’t fasten my seat belt had I been convinced that the fate of the entire world hinged upon my success. My belly was simply too large. As I recall, it was a moot point because I couldn’t reach the pedals anyway, having been forced to move the seat back in order to stuff my sorry self between the seat and the steering wheel. At that juncture in time, driving became something I used to do. Yet another sign, I’d surmise.

Apparently I wasn’t the only individual who took note of my newly adopted Behemoth-like qualities. It’s rumored there was a twisted little pool at work in which people bought chances on my final weigh-in, although I suspect that guessing my girth would have been more of a challenge. At any rate, it’s likely the pool-at-work thing would have led me to question thoughts I might have previously dismissed about unexplained weight gain and/or a sudden proclivity toward rotundness. Or at least I would hope so.

Another not-so-subtle indicator, for me anyway, would have been the impossible-to-ignore, round-the-clock, profusion of activity taking place within the swell of my belly. That said, waves of movement were evident throughout the latter part of my pregnancy, ranging from tiny flutters here and there to giant undulations rippling across my entire midsection. More specifically, when Thing One or Thing Two shifted position, it was as if the earth had moved. Of course, it was insanely fascinating to watch, too, and I recall parking myself on the couch so that the peanut gallery that had gathered could witness my freakish sideshow firsthand. Elbows distinctly flashed, as did knees and a flurry of tiny feet. “Kewl,” my oldest daughter mouthed again and again, struck by the wondrous stirrings within.

All things considered, I still struggle mightily with the Kentucky woman’s pregnancy-related oblivion. Translation: I’m beyond skeptical and fast approaching contemptuous.

A bit envious, too. There, I said it.

Melinda L. Wentzel, aka Planet Mom, is a freelance writer and slice of life newspaper columnist whose primary aim is to unearth the humor contained within everyday life experiences—especially those related to parenting. She and her husband reside in Williamsport, PA with their three daughters (ages 22, 9 and 9). Log on to Melinda Wentzel.com for more information. Copyright 2010 Melinda L. Wentzel

Like This Article

Like Mamapedia

Learn From Moms Like You

Get answers, tips, deals, and amazing advice from other Moms.

173 Comments

Thanks for many belly laughs and guffaws with this article, Melinda. Humor is a priceless gift to share. My own mother had a collapsed uterus and was told she could not become pregnant. So at age 27 and after 6 years of marriage, she was quite surprised to discover she was 6 months pregnant. Did her doctor tell her? No, although she had seen him several times for various complaints and he had pronounced that it was "all in her head"...

See entire comment

I hear ya! I do not understand how something like pregnancy, which overtakes your body for 9 months, goes ignored. Or unacknowledged. One thing I always find when watching those 'I didn't know I was pregnant until my baby fell into the toilet' shows is that the doctors skirt around the issue that these women are often morbidly obese. I don't know if being so overweight truly impairs your ability to judge a pregnancy (for both Mom and MD!), but that often seems to be a culprit.

Friend of a friend story. Mostly I agree with you. Hard to imagine.
My friend has a friend who had that happen. The thing is... she was anorexic or bulimic (don't remember) and completely out of touch with her own body. No idea about normal bodily functions. Hadn't had a period in years. Had not a clue about a normal relationship with food. Throwing up was not abnormal for her. She was in recovery when she got pregnant...

See entire comment

I'm totally with ya! Short of being in a coma (which would then beg to explain how you got pregnant) I don't know how a person can not know she's pregnant. I mean, if I pee that much and I don't have a bun in my oven then I'm going to camp at the doctor's office. Something is not right if you're in the washroom 15 times in 1 hour.

Great article, I too am a skeptic...

See entire comment

I understand the humor of the article, but I don't think you can say, "no way they didn't know!". If my Mom or my own Aunt said this happened to her, I would in no way deny her of that fact. Granted, I would put 20 questions to shame, but I would believe her none the less. There are tens of thousands of people pregnant in this country today, who's to say out of all the pregnancies there aren't hundreds that go unnoticed. If not, it sure is good TV.

Planet mom, it seems clear that you could not miss the hints your body and state of mind gave you.
But that does not apply to everyone.
Some women have a menstrual flow even while they are pregnant. And for some there are no signs like mood swings, or apparent physical changes. This does not only happen for women built on generous lines, even some slim women only become noticeably pregnant during the last 2 or 3 months.

I was pregnant for 3 months with my second child without knowing it. The first time, I knew something was wrong as everything about me and my body was changing. The second time around, I had my period for 4 months and on the 3rd month I went to the Gyno and told him that something was wrong and sure enough I was 3 months pregnant. The female body goes through so many changes that it is hard to imagine that pregnancy could go unnoticed for 9 months...

See entire comment

I love the article but do have to say how the heck does something like this go without being noticed, I must say that with my last appointment with my last gynae check up I saw a mom to be she was actually overdue and was admitted the same day for induction, my word, the body looked like that of a supermodel with not even a bump, wished I could look like that when I was pregnant

I laugh every time I hear of such a farce...but I agree with Jess in saying it does make for interesting TV. I knew a girl who didn't want her family to know she was pregnant (it was pretty obvious, she was gaining weight) finally when she got so large she had to tell her parents...she was unwed and from a large christain family and the boy was a different race...need I say more...

See entire comment

I guess my only thoughts are that pregnancies are so different and so are people. Anomalies exist within any system. I have a cousin who's pain receptors are nearly nonexistent while I cry from a bad papercut. I have another cousin who, because of placenta positioning never felt her baby move and I gave birth to two acrobats...

See entire comment

Wow... I guess I need to check in with you because apparently the way you see and feel things is the way everyone should/does see and feel them. I am grateful that your pregnancy was a time marked with many memorable and acknowledged milestones. You are blessed there is no doubt of that. I am a bit shocked however at your willingness to attack this woman's credibility on a public forum without due cause. Journalism and reporting, both of which you do here- has standards...

See entire comment

I agree that it seems a little strange that a woman would not notice her own pregnancy. Perhaps this issue is more complex though. I have to wonder if a lack of education plays a roll, and perhaps a dose of denial as well. We take it for granted that everyone in our country knows how you get pregnant, knows what to do when you get pregnant, and knows what it feels like when you are pregnant, but that really and sadly is not true. Especially in fundamentally religious communities...

See entire comment

Well, at least I can say that maybe there's a possibility that some of these women never experienced real labor, as I sit here 38 wks and 6+ cm dilated with my third child and nary a "normal" or regular set of contractions to be found. My first two were induced, so I've no idea what real labor is like...

See entire comment

I would say not every pregnancy is the same, however. With my 4 children. I had 2 pregnancies I knew from Day 1 (ok more like Day 5), but I was totally aware something was different. Those were my second and my last pregnancies. With my other two I had one with NO changes. With my first I didn't even begin to suspect anything was different until I was roughly 3.5 months and the only difference was I became tired all the time and since I tend to have low iron decided to get my iron level checked...

See entire comment

I think this has more to do with how much a woman knows about her body and her mind set during the time she is unknowingly pregnant. Most woman either plan, suspect or fear pregnancy and therefore are looking for clues to tell them that they are, or are not pregnant. For many woman pregnancy is something that is almost always in the back of their mind...

See entire comment

Leave a Comment

Required
Required (will not be published)
Required (to prove you're human)
Comments are moderated and generally will be posted if they are on topic and not abusive
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us
Want to become a contributor?
Want to become a contributor?

If you'd like to contribute to the Wisdom of Moms on Mamapedia, please sign up here to learn more: Sign Up

Recent Voices Posts

See all