boundaries
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Need Help Establishing Boundries with Family Working for Special Needs Child
Asked by K.B. from Minneapolis
on October 6, 2008
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I am having trouble establishing boundaries with my mother and other family members that provide personal care needs for my daughter.
They are supposed to follow ...
Answers
- Hiring family is very tricky and unless you and the other family members are able to treat this as a professional job (and keep personal issues out of it) then it is n...
- Dear K., Well, I guess reading your entry and the other one posted I have a much different thing to say. I guess I kinda want to see if I have the details straight...
- I think you need to just look at the way you approach your family members. Think about how you would feel in their shoes. Talk to them the way you would want to be t...
Monster N Law Please Help I'm Going Insane with My Mother N Law.
Asked by S.L. from Pittsburgh
on February 18, 2007
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i have this wonderful husband and i love him to death,and i beleive we marry our husbands not our in laws but my problem is his mother she oversteps her boundaries alo...
Answers
- simple stop letting her over just write her a letter or send her a copy of this letter and change your phone number...I did with my mother in law and it has been the b...
- You should go ahead and disrespect her and not feel bad about it, sounds like that's all she's ever done to you!
- Oh, my, I feel for you! Been there, done that...see my post on my mother in law by clicking on my name. If these are the things she is doing, it is best just to cut ...
Mother-In-Law Boundaries
Asked by D.R. from Kansas City
on December 17, 2008
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We live in an unconventional situation. My husband runs his small business (a theater) out of the main floor of the building and we live in the basement (thank you hou...
Answers
- D., MIL can be a little difficult at times but then so can daughter in laws. I guess I am about to play devils advocate here, but it is about mending family hurts mor...
- D., I am so sorry to hear that you are having problems with your mother-in-law. It is difficult. But remember that all mothers think they know how to raise kids. But ...
- OK, I get your husband's point that you need to talk to her, but HIS MOM, HIS PROBLEM. My MIL does the same, as does my mom. It's easier to call your own mom out on ...
Toddler and Infant Boundaries........
Asked by T.D. from Albuquerque
on June 23, 2009
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I have a three yr old boy and a 16 month old girl who for the most part understand disapline. They know that there is a consequence for their actions. Well as much as ...
Answers
- Hi T., Thank you for raising your children with strict boundaries to show your love: awesome. Out of the home can be a little trickier (it is for us), but I make t...
- My rule with my kids has always been 'If it's not yours, don't touch it.' They do need reminding occasionally when they are into something. I ask them is it yours? T...
- You need to take the same discipline methods you use for other issues and apply them here. If they're climbing in your cousin's cabinets there are consequences and if ...
Help Correcting a Two Year Old????
Asked by L.C. from Dayton
on March 28, 2008
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My son is two and I have come to the conclusion that I spoiled him. Well not just me, but me and my husband. And our older children. We didn't really mean to, but h...
Answers
- Try the book or video "1-2-3 Magic", it's a time out method. I've recommended this book so many times I'm starting to sound like a broken record. We started using it...
- I would say that at 2, your son is starting to get old enough to be reasoned with. Maybe you could explain to him that since he is getting to be such a big boy now, i...
- Hi L.: I just had a great breakthrough with my 20 month old, who is a wonderful little person, but throws her fair share of tantrums just like any other toddler. We d...
How to Set Boundaries with Parents and In-laws: Food
Asked by J.L. from San Francisco
on July 27, 2009
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My husband and I have had some frustrations with establishing good eating habits with our toddler son. He's 2 years 8 mos. We just started reading some of Ellyn Satter...
Answers
- Month long visits? That's awfully long. Is it possible to have shorter visits, but more of them? Even 2 visits of 2 weeks would be better. You have a tough situati...
- Dear J., Grandparents, especially those who only see the kids and grandkids a couple of times each year (if that), naturally want to do for and spoil their family a...
- As a Mom of four children, day care provider for 36 years, and have yearly trainings with the state food program and a college class of in cooking and feeeing children...
Teaching Boundaries Without Braking the Spirit?
Asked by M.J. from Seattle
on July 26, 2009
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Our 16 month old lil fella, Tasa, is more able then ever and therefore is discovering that their are more boundaries and responsability too, which has proven to be qui...
Answers
- 1. Teach him sign language so he can communicate with you better. Signing Times are the best videos. 2. The Happiest Toddler on the Block--get the video, not the b...
- You can teach a strong willed child boundaries without hitting. It takes more effort and will from the parent but it can be done. Removing the child from the place...
- PARENTING WITH LOVE & LOGIC books or CD's will give you LOTS of great ideas. I see too many parents TELLING their children what to do or not to do. They are not givin...
Recommendations for a Good Parenting/discipline Book
Asked by J.M. from Phoenix
on May 19, 2009
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My two boys have gone through a lot of changes over the last two years between a divorce, a move across country and then back to AZ, me going back to work, me going ba...
Answers
- Hi J., We are also in a blended family...and the poor kids...they have SO much to deal with...all the different houses, and relatives, and friends of the family, schoo...
- I was impressed how a friend handled her son's defiance and she gave me her book 123 Magic and I found it very helpful for me to learn to stay calm and consistent with...
- I have three grown children and I direct a preschool in Tempe. I've had much experience with children and the author I love to recommend is Dr. Kevin Leman. He is fa...
3 Year Old Acting Out
Asked by M.C. from Shreveport
on March 19, 2009
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My friend has a 3 year old daughter. She recently started babysitting for a friend three days a week. Her daughter, in light of sharing her "mommy", is now begining to...
Answers
- she will need to give her daughter some undivided attention when she is not babysitting. BUT, God gave us children and He gave us a handbook to raise them, the Bible....
- Could try reading books by John Rosemond ("A Family of Value," "Making the 'Terrible' Twos Terrific!", etc.) - he recommends common sense instead of any particular tec...
- in short, get Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by Becky Bailey. Great book, you'll both love it! Anything by Sheedy Kurcinka is great, too. Can't remember he...
Troubled Two Year Old
Asked by J.H. from Sheboygan
on August 29, 2007
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Hello all,
I am seeking adivce on how to modify my two year olds behavior. She has suddenly begun to tell people she doesn't like them, pushes them, tells us she is ...
Answers
- I'd say have your husband invite her over and sit down the three of you and talk about it. She needs to hear it from him, too. I'd also suggest finding someone else to...
- It sounds to me like the actions of our sister-in-law favoring neices and nephews may have made things worse. any other child who says things to a 2year old are going ...
- Do not let you mother in law watch her any more. Try to find a teen or college student to watch her. Not sure how often you need a sitter or if it's just to go out o...
