Testing Limits: Tween
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14 Year Old Thinks Rules Too Strict - NO MORE RESPONSES PLEASE. THANKS for ALL!
Asked by K.L. from Memphis
on December 8, 2008
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My 14 year old daughter seems to think a few of my rules are too strict. So, she asked me if I’d get the opinion of other mothers – particularly those I don’t k...
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- Hi K., I have 3 children(9,5 and 2) so I'm not dealing with this yet but I think your rules are reasonable. I do feel you can compromise some on the 2 per month ...
- I think the rules you have in place are very generous. My 14 yr old does not have such freedoms. Everything she does is monitored,from her online activites to her phon...
- I am a mother of 5 and I really think that your rules are "very" GOOD. She is lucky to have a curfew of 10p.m. When my kids were at the age of 13 to 16, their curfew w...
Summer for a 12 and 10 Year Old - Leave Them Home Alone?
Asked by J.C. from New York
on January 30, 2012
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So my friend has 2 kids - a 12 year old girl and a 10 year old boy. As a family, they take two weeks off during the summer.
For the other 6 plus weeks, she plans...
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- My neighbors left their 15 & 17 year old girls for a long weekend. Responsible, good grades, church going nice girls. 3 day party, toilet upstairs broke, overflowe...
- We were home like this and I babysat 2 girls under 6 every day at 12 so I don't see the big issue. Although I was raised in Philly, so we all played outisde or in eac...
- I wouldn't do it. There's too much that could happen when parents are not at home. They could go to the Y or some other day camp to keep them busy (and running - I w...
10 Year Old Defiant Son
Asked by J.F. from Minneapolis
on January 10, 2008
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I am so desperate for any advice from other parents of 10 year old boys. My son is not at all respectful of my discipling him, he doesn't care what I threaten him with...
Answers
- maybe he just wants more attention from you- sounds a lot like my 8 year old son- the other thing a lot of us moms just threaten and we don't follow thru so that's a l...
- Sounds like you are dealing with ODD-Oppossitional Defiant Disorder and possibly ADHD-Attetion Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. I strongly suggest you get your son help...
- I am a 52y/o mom of 8 from ages 16-31, 4 of them adopted from Russia. 5 girls 3 boys. The first thing I see is that you are threatening him. Get parenting with love...
14 Year Old Very Sassy
Asked by J.P. from Dover
on February 18, 2012
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I have a 14 year old daughter that is my precious girl. She's smart and can have a strong personality. At times I feel she can be disrespectful. I want to encourage...
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- our rule is that if you can't say something nice, zip it. if you don't zip it, you lose something. figure out what is important to her, what would make it worth it to ...
- Ah, my 15 year old son is at this stage also. He is very critical of my actions - driving, spending, cleaning, opinions, just everything. Since I try and pick my battl...
- My children are much younger but we've had to talk w/ a professional re: one of them (behavior issues) and the one thing that really stuck w/ me was that they are doin...
Seeking Moms with 12 Year Old Girls Who Think There Grown
Asked by A.A. from Louisville
on March 5, 2008
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Help my child is moody ,rude,just down right disrespectful.
Answers
- In the famous words of Bette Davis.."Fasten your seatlbelts, it's gonna be a bumpy ride." I have 4 children on the other side of 12 and let me tell you that is a moder...
- Hey A., I feel your pain, my stepdaughter was horrible when she was 12! It's something about those puberty years that they just give you all the hell they can. Firs...
- Hi A.. I have worked with girls 7 to 17, who ran away from home or parents were being given a respite from their out of control child. Hopefully, it is not too late fo...
11 Year Old with Fierce Temper and Anger Issues! HELP!
Asked by C.E. from Dallas
on March 5, 2009
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My 11 year old daughter (middle child) has an outrageous temper with me. With her teachers, classmates, friends or strangers she is an ANGEL 100%. But with me she is r...
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- Whatever you do, don't take her comments to you personally. When I was 11, that was the darkest time of my life. I had low self esteem. And other issues. Girls this ag...
- I don't know if you are interested, but I heard that a great nanny agency in DFW, Mom's Best Friend, just launched a Family Coaching program. It sounds like they are ...
- Give her positive feedback when she answers politely. Be firm with the discipline and make it stick. Give her lots of one on one time with you. Counselling could be ...
My Fiance's 12 Year Old Son's Behavior Is Out of Control!
Asked by C.P. from Portland
on May 6, 2009
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I am engaged to a man with a 12 year old son. This is the first time I have been with a man who has a kid so it has taken some real adjusting on my part. Since the mot...
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- C. - Think long and hard about what you want for your life. You are very young. At the very least, you have 8-10 years of a lot of work, frustration and heartache ah...
- I'm going to give some not so popular advice but it's perfectly legal. If after a while reasoning, loss of privelege, and counseling don't work. Then maybe his father ...
- I believe that one a kid hits what I call the tween age (ages be twin about 9 and 10 to about 12) be for there a teenager they tend to act out more due to hormones in ...
I Think My 13 Year Old Hates Me. HELP!
Asked by S.S. from Omaha
on May 18, 2010
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I'm positive my 13 year old daughter hates me. I totally go out of my way to make her happy, she has a cell, a laptop, a giant tv in her room. I buy her everything tha...
Answers
- I am certainly no expert :) However, I have successfully raised 2 girls (now 21 and 20) and currently have a 13 yr old girl. First, she doesn't hate you! In fact, s...
- I've only read your first sentence and have 2 comments. It's her job as a 13 yo to hate you. lol And, you are making a big mistake going out of your way to make he...
- You need to stop trying to make her happy and you need to start being her parent. "I buy her everything she asks for"... Why should she clean or her room, if she wants...
My 13 Year Old Isn't Doing His Homework and Is Misbehaving in School
Asked by A.U. from Washington DC
on March 27, 2009
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My 13 year old isn't doing his homework and is misbehaving in school. This is his second attempt at the 6th grade and I am worried he won't make it. He doesn't bring h...
Answers
- hi A., it does sound as if *something* has happened to set off this behavior, as you seem to indicate this is not just his personality. i doubt it's sudden-onset ADD ...
- Hi A., I know this can be frustrating for everyone. First, now that you have taken everything away from him, there is no motivation to be responsible. You might wan...
- Hopefully, you've gotten lots of helpful advice. My oldest has many of the same challenges you describe. Some kids need a lot of attention. Much of what you describ...
Ten Year Old Son Is Testing Our Limits
Asked by A.A. from San Francisco
on March 12, 2009
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Hi Moms,
I've been blessed to have two sons who came to me in entirely two different ways but love each other and me so much. My ten year old stepson is with us ful...
Answers
- Hi A. - You're right in identifying that his lack of relationship with his mom is causing some of this conflict. He is angry and sad, most likely, and acting out th...
- Hi A.. See, we really do need to get together. I think J and K are cut from the same mold. In our situation, I did let up and things went completely haywire. He ...
- That's a big one. Children need to feel control and have power over things. How will they ever learn to use it properly if they don't experience it. Seems like i...
