19 answers

Would You Want Your Friends to Join Your Gym?

Ok - for those of you that join and gym and go regularly (at least 2 or 3 times a week) would you want your friends to join if they could?

I guess my real question is my gf wants to join my gym - but she is someone that needs a work out buddy. I DO NOT need a workout buddy and I don't want to have to work out with someone just because they need it. Does that make sense? I've been a long time gym member (at least 8 years of regular, steady attendance) and have a little schedule that is just the way I like it.

Grr...I feel bad cause I want her to join so she does something healthy for herself but she has a history of joining, being gung ho for a couple weeks...then bailing for some lame reason. Maybe I am just over thinking this whole thing - it is a big gym - and I guess I need to stick to my own schedule if she pushes me to deviate.

Any thoughts?

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Wow Dawn H - I think you are the one quick to judge - I did not say a negative thing in that post - you just want to stir trouble for no reason. Thanks everyone else for good advice - I have decided that I'm going to stick with my own schedule and if she wants to join me she can - but I will not be adjusting my schedule to accomodate her.

Featured Answers

I wouldn't assume she'll want to work out with you, until she actually mentions it. Until then, it's just speculation.

I agree that working out can be a very personal thing... I am a runner and I do occasionally run with a friend but overall I enjoy doing it solo. It's my time to clear my head and erase any emotional baggage. I was talking a friend the other day who lives out of town and she said that if she lived here she would run w/me. I was thinking about how I'm so glad that she doesn't live here so I don't have to get out of running with her. I think even the best friends can come with emotional baggage and that's something I don't need with me when I'm running.

I'd do what some other mamas have suggested about welcoming her to join and consult with a trainer, but tell her that workout time for you is personal time. Me time. Time for you to unwind and that you need that quiet time. Good luck!!

More Answers

I don't think it matters if anyone else would want their friends to join. What is important is YOUR feelings about working out.

I don't think that I would talk about the subject to her at all. If you bring it up, then she will expect you to help her. And that isn't what you want.

D.

2 moms found this helpful

I can't workout with other people either, it slows me down, especially if they are wanting to have a conversation the whole time. I would have her meet with one of the trainers to have them put her on her own workout routine that way, if she wants, she can carpool with you but once at the gym, you two have to go your seperate ways to be able to meet your specific goals.

2 moms found this helpful

I don't see a problem with it. Encourage her to join and get a personal trainer so she knows what to do. Wish her luck and if you happen to be working out at the same time don't worry about it. Keep doing what you're doing. Be polite. Hey glad you joined.....Gotta run...gotta get 4 miles in this hour. Catch you later. Or see ya gotta run but let's catch up when we're done working out and you can tell me how it went for you...If you're on a schedule people need to understand. I am sure she'll get the point quickly.

1 mom found this helpful

yes!!......some of my friends (most actually) have expressed an interest in losing weight. I have 2 sets of everything i use when i work out in case someone wants to join. I am motivated by company. 2 of the girls who said they wanted to workout with me NEVER do. 2 others do it in spurts. 1 friend will actually set dates and keep them but its not often. I am running out of workout buddies!

1 mom found this helpful

I am the same way. Just be honest with your friend. Explain you think it's great she wants to start working out but you don't like having a workout buddy. It's not personal, so don't make it personal.

1 mom found this helpful

I say stick with your schedule If she says something about joining just say something like "yeah I feel great after a good work out" and "it really allows me to gather my thoughts/day dream while I'm on the treadmill." Under no circumstances do you say that you will work out with her, and if she asks you to be her buddy say that you wouldn't be a good routine buddy because you always stick to your schedule and any other reason that you want to give her. If you are her friend it wouldn't be right to discourage her but if she is under the impression that you will help her, you do need to set her straight.

1 mom found this helpful

I do like to have a workout buddy, so, of course I would. But, it wont be a problem if you guys are in two differant places physically. My bf in college and I went to the gym together and I tried to do her workout. Nearly killed me. I wandered over to the stair climber and treadmill with the rest of the pudgy girls and was perfectly happy there. We would still go at the same time and encourage each other, but we split ways when we got there and met back up after. I think it would be nice if you encourage your friend and try yo motivate her to go, but really, she will know she's out of her league trying to keep up with you. Direct her to the Zumba class. She will love it.

1 mom found this helpful

Funny you ask this b/c I was just thinking about this the other day. I'm still new to the gym thing. I have been a member for almost a year now w/ steady attendance, maybe a couple 2 week lapses but not bad. When I 1st joined, I asked all my friends to come along, everyone declined & a couple joined places more convienent for them ( understandable). After thinking about it, I'm so glad I go on my own. Like you , I have a routine & when I have to change that routine for scheduling conflicts, no big deal , I don't feel the need to work around my "partners" schedule. Also, everyone's workout preferences are different and should be. I think if you feel forced to do what your partner is doing but it isn't a good fit, a person wouldn't't be successful / stay committed. I honestly don't think I would still be going had I joined w/ someone else. A couple of my friends that joined other places aren't going any longer. I've made friends at the gym that are in the same classes & have the same fitness interests.

1 mom found this helpful

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