M.B. asks from Pleasant Hill, CA on February 03, 2008
Work Life Balance-Suggestions
First of all, I don't believe that there is such a thing as "work life balance." If you are a working mother, you have no choice but to figure out some way to manage not only a full time job, but also homework, sicknesses, housework, laundry, cooking, shopping, carpools, soccer practice, and all the other aspects of being a mom. I would give ANYTHING to be a stay at home mom (which I'm not saying is an easy job)....but it would be SO AWESOME to be able to forget about my "outside" work and just focus on my work at home!!
Any other moms out there working full time and struggling to "balance" work and home? How do you do it? What are your tips? Do you think there is such thing as a "balance?" Oh yes....and if you have any suggestions for how I can become independently wealthy and QUIT working outside the home..I'd love to hear those!
So What Happened?™
Wow. This website is awesome. Thanks so much for all of your input (and I welcome more!) It is just nice first of all to know that others have this issue on their mind (I knew they did....but the people I work with just seem to have it ALL together!) Sometimes I forget what a universal issue this is. I appreciate all of your suggestions and will take them to heart ( I especially LOVE the idea of hubby pitching in more....I'll have to report back to let you all know how that works out!) Thanks again!
S.W. answers from San Francisco on February 05, 2008
Hi M. -
My Boyfriend and I have 4 kids between the 2 of us, he has 2 boys and I have 2 girls (9,7,4 and 18 months). Even when we just have the 2 girls it can be chaotic and I don't know how to achieve a balance but what has helped us is that everyone MUST pitch in. With that many kids and you working outside of the home there is no reason that all the members of your family can't contribute in some way, helping with the dishes, laundry, etc.
Put em' to work!! :)
D.C. answers from Reno on May 05, 2008
Hi M., Your right balance is tricky! Some days you have it and others you don't. I think its harder for women because they always have guilt. If we are successful at our jobs, we feel like a failure at home. Or if we are the greatest stay at home moms, we feel guilty for not contributing to our family income. It's a tricky situation. I guess all we can do is the best we can. And having your family help you out at home makes a big difference. My kids help out with their own laundrey. They are going to have to learn how to do it sometime. But it sounds like you are a great mom! You should stop and give yourself a pat on the back. You are taking care of your family at home, and helping provide for them. Some day they will look back and realize everything you have done. You are teaching them great moral values.
About becoming independently wealthy, I'm not sure, but I did start my oun home business in Jan. and It has been going great! The extra money has been very nice, and it is also nice to have something that is my own, I am in control of every part of it. I do know women in this company that make a very good living at it, and stay at home. If you are interested I can send you some info. Or check it out on my website. www.southernlivingathome.com/danacarey I hope this helps.
P.R. answers from Sacramento on February 04, 2008
I work full-time in management,I have four kids 6,9,11,14. If you wish to become independently wealthy and not work..better start buying lottery tickets and wishing for lots of luck:)It is hard trying to get everything done but I let my husband help do the shopping now and help with meals. The kids have certain chores they are responsible for, and everyone has to help out. I just turned off the cable so that the time we do have...we spend talking, playing games, and just connecting. I just try to stay sane by realizing I cannot do it all and ask for help..:) advice on balancing the two..LOL that depends on what moment you ask...
K.R. answers from Sacramento on July 13, 2008
Someone that I know who was struggling with the work/life balance thing retired from her teaching job in the first 6 months because of a home based business she launched 3 years ago. It has changed her family's life.
I am seeing the changes starting to take place in my family's life too.
If you are interested in hearing more about what we did - email me and I will share our business and plan with you.
It is amazing and could turn you into that stay at home mom that you so crave.
B.R. answers from Salinas on February 05, 2008
I do the work life balance.. its very hard which you know, but here are some of the things I do to make is less stressful. The chores in the house, Cooking, cleaning, laundry etc. we switch off making dinner every other night, every other night we rotate the bath schedules, when my husband is not working, he takes to the kids to the baby sitters for me I pick them up. the Laundry I wash and dry and he will fold and put away. just rotate some of things you have with your husband, have your friends or inlaws pick up your kids, if your older one is driving have him help out! it works.
S.W. answers from Sacramento on February 06, 2008
SAHM not all it's cracked up to be. You lose your sense of "self" your own "identity" sometimes. Hubby thinks that house should be spotless and kids perfect,,,you hair and make-up and gym and laundry all check, check, check--even he does not voice it--reality is however, some days I don't even get a shower! My house is constantly a mess because we LIVE in it--24/7. When I quit my job, I think that in a way, I quit ME. It is harder than you could ever imagine. I wish for a job some days. The financial sacrifices we have to make are enormous. Independent wealth--I wish! More like single income--no more vacations and even mortgage is hard to cover at times. My hope is that I can return to work when youngest starts school. We'll see. I do meet with a small moms club and for the most part we all agree that we are, lonely, isolated, understimulated as adults, and as women. When your entire identity becomes "mommy" where do YOU go? And what about your husbands wife? Well pros-cons---balance--idk?
I do like to sleep in on rainy days and not worry where to send my kids when they get a fever on a school day. I do like meeting my best friends for playdates and coffee at noon. I do like being the art docent at my daughters school. Nature walks and holiday crafts w/o time constraints rock too! :)