Wiping After Poop

Updated on February 24, 2015
J.S. asks from Los Angeles, CA
13 answers

My son is 5 and a half and I still wipe him after he poops. I want him to start trying on his own but his arms don't seem quite long enough - when I tell him to wipe, he can't seem to get his hand down enough to swipe between the cheeks (sorry TMI!). I told him I'd buy him a toy if he wiped himself for three straight weeks and now he's all gungho to try but I'm wondering how I should advise him to wipe given that his arm doesn't seem quite long enough - advise on position when wiping? Thanks!

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Most kids this age wipe on their own and they're the same age and same size.

They just don't do a perfect job. You need to let him do this his own way and accept he's going to have some residue in his underwear occasionally.

2 moms found this helpful

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M.S.

answers from Seattle on

Would wiping when standing up be easier for him? That's why my parents did for me when I was learning to wipe, my brother too. Can you have dad or another male figure show him how it's done?

Also, just a thought, you might want to shorten the reward time a little. 3 weeks is a long time, IMO, for a 5 year old. How about making it a week to ten days? that way he doesn't get so frustrated. If you make it into smaller chunks of time, and reward with smaller items, there will often be more success. Maybe get him a bigger ticket item when he has finally mastered wiping for good. Don't expect perfection the first few times, but he will learn with practice.

8 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

He can reach just as well as the rest of us. He needs to learn to brace himself leaning one butt cheek on the toilet seat and the other lifted up a bit, with his dominant hand reaching around after he twists his body. Use wipes vs. toilet paper - have him check the wipe, then fold in half and use again. Be sure he wipes front to back, and just once per pass - going back and forth just smears things. Limit 3 wipes unless there's a real problem. To teach him, place a wipe directly over his anus and up in his butt crack. Ask him to feel what that feels like. Then take a clean wipe and have him do it, literally making sure he can feel the "hole" himself through the wipe. Let him check the wipe on the 2nd one to see if it's clean. If not, he can drop it in the bowl and use a third one.

I think 3 weeks is a super long time for a 5.5 year old. Give smaller prizes once a week. You can reward with a big prize after 3-4 weeks if you want.

And the prizes only come if there is really good hand washing with soap - 30 seconds of making lather -not just putting soap on the hands and sticking them under the water immediately, which is what most kids do. They have to lather up, rub and sing the ABC song for the whole time.

5 moms found this helpful
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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

What Diane B says EXCEPT the wipe goes in the garbage NOT the bowl. Our plumber assures us the biggest cause of clogs he sees is wipes - disposable or not.

4 moms found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

His torso is flexible, he can do it.

3 moms found this helpful
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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

Have him stand.
And use wet wipes.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Two of my little ones had to stand while wiping when they started out. It also I think made it easier for them to check that that they had done a good job (they were my smaller ones, I think balancing on the toilet seat was a bit hard for them!).

I would also mention that if he doesn't wipe well that it can get itchy, etc. I used to tell one of mine that (because it does get uncomfortable if not clean) and that was incentive - he didn't want to get itchy at school.

I agree about the 3 week thing - my kids would lose interest by a few days I'm sure :)

And I know what you mean about the arms not being very long .. it does appear that way. But they can! it just takes some practice especially where you've been doing it for him. He'll get it! Good luck :)

2 moms found this helpful
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E.T.

answers from Rochester on

Wet wipes. But do NOT flush the wipes. Even if they say flushable.

2 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

he can stand up and bend over or reach behind. the sitting posture can be awkward for little people.
do you have wet wipes for him? that will help a lot.
he can learn to wrap the wipes in tp and put them in the trash, not flush them.
yes, he should be wiping himself at this age.
khairete
S.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Miami on

He needs to stand to wipe. It isn't perfect and sometimes you might need to help. My older son needed help until he was close to 7 if he had really soft poop - he is also very small.

My 4 year old son does pretty well now - but he is almost the size of his 9 year old brother.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.C.

answers from Louisville on

I would also suggest using a flushable wet wipe while he is figuring it out. The do a better job, and he is less likely to break through the toilet paper and make a mess of himself. Once he is able to perform the motion, you can have him start with regular tp.

1 mom found this helpful
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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Still young.
He'll get there. Had this same issue w/my kids.
Btw, use diaper wipes (they work better) & have the kiddos put them in
trash bin instead of toilet.
At this age, wiped their bums to ensure they were clean until about the age the age of 6.

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C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

My son is the same age and he fits into 5/6 and some size 7 clothes and is average height/weight and he can reach. Have you observed your son trying? I'd have him try first then you can come in after and assist. Sometimes my son does a good job, other times, not so much!

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