Wine? Is This B/s

Updated on May 17, 2012
S.E. asks from Caldwell, NJ
33 answers

so my fiance bought a book a few months ago about being a father .. its a pretty damn long book lol so he hasnt been reading it start to finish he'll pick it up and read parts and look through and pick out certain sections and read them.. so he told me that he read in the book that once u are in your 3rd trimester its safe to have one glass of wine but he cant remember if it said white wine or red wine and he cant find where he read it he said that it said as long as its not more then one glass a week or something like that its ok... is the true?.. and if so is it red wine or white wine?
-itd be nice to have a little bit of wine when we go out to dinner this weekend i havent had a drop of alcohol since taking the pregnancy test (im 29 weeks now).. but im kind of scared to .. everyone iv talked to is under the" o0h one glass wont hurt" impression but i dont know im not so sure

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So What Happened?

thank you for all the responces.. i wasnt thinking about all the oh sh*t looks id get from people being out in a restaurant.. this is my frist pregnancy this is all new to me and i was always under the impression that u could drink absolutley no alcohol while pregnant so when my fiance told me that i was like really!?? maybe if i decide to have a glass i will do it at home though lol thanks again

Featured Answers

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

That is actually true and the kind of wine doesn't matter. I never did it mind you, it just didn't feel right. My OB even said it was okay.

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K..

answers from Phoenix on

Well, the opinions vary on this topic (as you can see). I just didn't see the point in drinking alcohol when pregnant, honestly. Even if it was a little risk, it just wasn't something I felt I needed or had to do.

Ultimately, you have to decide if it's something you really want to do & if you'll feel okay about it.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

my first anniversery was 2 weeks before my daughter's due date, My dr told me it was ok for me to have one small glass of wine on my anniversery. Wine is ok as long as it's not everyday and then I'd only do it a couple of times .

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Why would you risk it?

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

Ask your OB. Ours told my wife that one glass was fine. (no difference between red or white)

Ours also said if she's craving caffeine or coffee - that it too would be ok to have one.

In practice, my wife gets a caffinated beverage about once every few weeks. And wine - one glass - maybe a little more often.
________________________________________________
ETA - I was just reading the responses and a thought hit me about your red versus white quandry. The medical aspect of limiting wine intake during pregnancy is due to the alcohol in the wine, and wouldn't care if you had one glass of red, white, rose, or blush.

The BOOK husband is reading might be focusing more on the "if you're going to have a glass - go with red" because red has health benefits associated with it. But I doubt you're wanting to drink a glass of wine to get the "healthy" side effects (which one glass won't do anyway).

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✤.J.

answers from Dover on

Yes, "one glass won't hurt" is correct. I understand wanting to be safe, we all understand that. I understand that the way things used to be done has changed over the years & it was specifically changed to keep us all safer than we were. With that being said, I know my mother drank hard alcohol on a regular basis the entire time she was pregnant with me (not shots or getting sloppy drunk, but a couple of drinks in the evening on a regular basis). I know because she told me. I was born in the very beginning of 1977 so things were very different then, but still, I'm completely fine & always have been.

With my first pregnancy I didn't drink a single sip of alcohol. With my 2nd I had 1 Coors Light (blech) on Christmas Eve when my due date was 6 weeks away. I was also at home. I'm not sure given what people's general response is to pregnancy & drinking that I would be comfortable having a drink anywhere outside of my own home, but I suppose that's just me.

ETA--Like Cheryl O said, my OB also told me everything in moderation. I know I'll get blasted for this, but I'm being 100% honest: Before becoming pregnant I smoked a pack of cigs a day. He told me if quitting altogether was going to cause me massive stress, it was better for the baby & he'd prefer it if I'd smoke 2-3 cigs a day rather than quit. I did smoke once or twice a day, a few drags here & there once I was past the morning sickness stage & it absolutely calmed me when I needed it to & I was able to do that without going back to the huge amount I had been smoking previously.

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K.W.

answers from Seattle on

A glass of wine (one, not two) is fine in your third trimester. We just live in the USA, the land of prohibition and liability. Researchers know that some amount of alcohol is fine, but they have not nailed down exactly how much is okay. So, instead of doing the hard work of figuring out how much is no longer "moderate", they simply tell you not to indulge at all. Liability. While you're at it, don't eat chocolate, drink coffee, or do anything remotely fun or pleasurable while you're pregnant. argh.

In France, the doctors tell pregnant women not to eat salad (due to food poisoning concerns) and to drink a glass of wine with dinner. They seem to have a much healthier attitude (and also have a lower incidence rate of FAS).

I drank very moderate amounts of wine during both pregnancies (3rd trimester). And unless alcohol is expected to cause highly spirited, curious, active youngsters, I don't think it affected either of my little ones in a negative way.

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☼.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

You know, I just never wanted to risk it. I mean, I love a good cocktail, believe me, but I figured 9 months of abstaining was pretty simple. Isn't it?

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W..

answers from Chicago on

My sister's baby is 3 months old.

Her OB - in manhattan - told her one glass of wine a couple nights a week over the course of dinner was FINE and would actually probably relax her.

Either red or white.... didn't matter. but they do say that red wine has anti-oxidants. So, if you like both I would go with red.

Not chugging a glass of wine.

I wouldn't say wine is any different than, say, lunch meat or soft cheese restrictions. If you eat some turkey and brie while you're pregnant it isn't going to hurt the baby. If you eat canned ham for b'fast lunch and dinner slathered with blue cheese..... not good.

I had ZERO alcohol while I was pregnant. I think if I had to do over again, I might have one glass of wine every now and then.

So, I would say go to your dinner, have one glass of wine during the entire dinner and enjoy yourself.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

MY OB told me "everything in moderation" -
ONE drink is fine. The whole bottle is NOT.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Yes, it's fine, red or white.
I know there are a lot of "perfect" mothers out there who NEVER expose their unborn fetuses to anything even remotely hazardous, but IMO a little alcohol is no worse than the cocktail of drugs most of us get pumped up with during childbirth.
And if you don't want it, don't feel pressured into it either. Your baby, your choice!

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had a glass or two of wine towards the end of my pregnancy. I even dared to order one with dinner in a restaurant once (that I remember). No one said a thing or looked at me funny. I didn't even consider that they might. That one glass of wine tasted soooo good (that I do remember).

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A.L.

answers from Atlanta on

I also am the product of a mother who drank alcohol regularly (a couple glasses of scotch every night, I think) while expecting me. Even though I wasn't born with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, I still wouldn't advise rolling the dice that way. A glass of wine once in a while is a different matter, however. But what's most important, have you asked your OB/medical person for his/her thoughts on drinking a glass of wine occasionally? I would trust his or her advice more than your fiance's hazy recollection of a couple sentences in a long book, if only because she's the expert whom you have chosen to guide you through the pregnancy. Have a great time, what ever you decide.

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K.M.

answers from Denver on

I don't think it is BS, I have heard that a lot too and I am sure it is true, but I was never willing to risk it! You could ask your OB, although I bet most of them just say don't touch it, but you never know.

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J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

I have also heard that a glass of wine or even one beer was ok. I am not a big drinker so I didn't have anything while I was pregnant. My OB even said it was OK to have one cup of coffee a day but no more than that.

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F.B.

answers from New York on

fetal alcohol syndrome is a scary thing, but i'm of the one glass won't hurt school.

F. B.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

In the old days before some of the newer drugs were available, when I would get contractions (I dilated very early) my doctor would tell me to open
a bottle of wine and have a glass. I have four healthy grown children with
families of their own. So have a glass, it will not hurt at this point. Or have
a wine spritzer. Enjoy.

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J.H.

answers from San Antonio on

It's red wine, and I wouldn't do it in public. Keep it to 4 ounces, nothing more. You can also have a dark ale. I was very late with my third pregnancy. I was 4 or 5 days past my due date and the baby's mom and dad were putting pressure on me. I was stressed. My midwife told me to go home, take a hot bath and drink some dark ale. I gave birth the next morning. It calmed the "false" contractions I was having and got my body together.

anyway, yes, one glass won't hurt.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

I've heard that too, but it would be a cold day in hell before I had the nerve to order a drink in a restaurant while obviously pregnant. I think that you would be putting your server in a very awkward position, and he or she would be sure to talk about you ("OMG that pregnant lady over there just ordered a glass of wine...should I serve it?!").

I was pregnant at my wedding (no one knew but DH and me) so I did have some sips of champagne at the reception to keep up appearances and I did have a glass of wine towards the end of another pregnancy. If you want, check with your OB but still, I wouldn't do it anywhere but home.

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B.M.

answers from Dallas on

I heard/read that too when I was pregnant. I never did it thought. Mostly because I was afraid if I had that ONE glass, I'd want a second one even more! :)

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

I drank whenever I wanted to during my pregnancy, probably right at once a week or less. I never had more than one glass at a time. I had people looking at me crazy at my shower because wine was being served and I insisted on having some.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

You've already had a ton of answers, but I never took the chance. It just wasn't worth it:)

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K.H.

answers from Reno on

I will be 28 weeks tomorrow and my OB said it was ok to have a few sips here and there or even a glass here and there as long as it isn't hard alcol, I drink it slowly, and eat something before having some. That being said I wouldn't drink in public unless you are prepared to deal with the backlash from others.
Now I did find some non alcoholic wine from Ariel vineyards(www.arielvineyards.com). They are located in California and have a selection of 9 wines that have virtually no alcohol. The prices are good(6-12$ a bottle) and they ship-or you can pick them up at Whole Foods if you have one close by! Good Luck!

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L.L.

answers from Orlando on

My dr said wine was ok. My friend is due mid June and has a glass of red wine every night. per her Dr it's ok. I think as long as you don't get drunk, 1 glass of wine is perfectly ok (red or white, makes no difference)

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E.M.

answers from Phoenix on

LOL...I was 7 months pregnant on our 10 year wedding anniversary. We went out to a very fancy dinner with some friends, one of whom is an RN. We ordered a bottle of champagne, and I said that I wanted a glass, then quickly said "and this woman is an RN and she says it is OK!" I was very obviously pregnant, so I did feel a bit odd about ordering it, but the waiter did not give me a hard time, other than joking a bit after my RN comment. No one at other tables or similar seemed to care a bit. Not like I was doing tequila shots off the bar or anything :) My first pregnancy I drank a total of 1 glass of red wine and one glass of champagne (because I was in France and I had to have those things in France) and part of one beer. During my second pregnancy, I had an occasional glass of wine, usually a half glass, all after 24 weeks. You know whether you will want a half glass or a half bottle (or a bottle and a half, or a bottle a day), so you know whether or not it is a good idea.

S.K.

answers from Denver on

like everyone else said its fine to have a glass every once in a while. With my first pregnancy I was to the book, no caffeine, no alcohol etc. With number 2 if I had a crappy day at work or was just really worked up i would have one drink here and there and she is perfectly fine. My ob said that it is amazing what kind of a job your liver does before anything even touches your baby. Same goes with nursing one drink will not produce alcohol in the milk.

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3.B.

answers from Cleveland on

It is totally ok at this point to have a glass of wine! And red or white doesn't matter, alcohol is alcohol. Some have ahigher content, but that depends on the kind, not the color.

You go ahead and have a glass! You'll be fine!

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

The WORST time to drink alcohol is in the first 4 weeks (aka before people can tell they're pregnant, so only those TTC are typically abstaining).

In the EU it's common to drink IN MODERATION while pregnant. Here's the problem:

In moderation is different for different people. A single serving of alcohol affects people differently. Statistically, most people can have 1 drink a day with no FAE or FAS. Some, however, do. Now, is that because they're fibbing when they report how much they're drinking? Maybe. Maybe not. So EU docs play it safe and say 1x-3x per week.

Red or white or beer matters not.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

My mother's friend heard the same thing more than 30 years ago so she indulged. Probably a bit too much, but she swears not. Her baby was born with a lot of birth defects. Don't know the cause.

Everyone is different. What might be okay for one, may not be okay for another. You'll have to decide for yourself.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I can honestly say that women over the ages drank wine throughout their entire pregnancy's. In other countries they still do. I do know that Fetal Alcohol syndrome is a distinct possibility even if you only have one drink.

I would do a lot of research on sites I trusted like webmd or Dr. Sears. They would tell you for sure.

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M.R.

answers from Dallas on

I have heard that its safe too. Your body will filter out the majority of anything that could harm the baby. There would be alot more damged kinds IMO if any alchohol could hurt that bad. I know lots of people that got hammered once or twice in early pregnancy... cause they didnt know they were pregnant.

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J.T.

answers from New York on

When was the book written? I know that 5 or so years ago it was considered ok. THese days as additonal research is done I have read that no amount is safe becuase they know it passes through to the baby, but they don't know the effects it could have.

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