Why Do You Send Your Child to Private School?

I did private preschool and kindergarten as part of a Montessori program. I am a huge believer in this approach to educating children, and I very much wanted it for my kids. Because of the costs, we had to move to public school for 1st grade, but I am hearbroken about it. It makes me sad, because I like that method of teaching, but also because I feel that public schools are inherently flawed. We do have one of the best public schools in the nation, but sadly I believe the public school system is so flawed, it doesn't matter. WhatI have observed so far in my "great"school system:

*huge classes and overworked teachers who are clearly frustrated
*teaching ot the lowest common denomminator and no individualized attention
*emphasis on worksheets instead of experimentaiton and manipulation
*emphasis on memorization an dspeed instead of the underlying concepts; focus on SOL and not expanded learning
*shoving the kids off onto computers for enrichment instead of giving them real work
*busy work while teachers spend weeks doing assessments
*lack of feedback on kids; as a parent, I don't hear from the teacher unless I inquire; there are a lot of support I could give her and my child if I know what was happening more regularly

Don't get me wrong, the teachers work hard, and I see where the school systems try to be progressive, but the problems are systemic. Teachers hands are tied in a public school and they are dealing with far more kids than they should have.

Another reason is this. Political sensitivity. You can't talk about religion or sexuality or lifestyle or anything else "sensitive' in a public school. I went to Catholic school, and we had very frank open discussions of concepts of god in different religions, homosexuality, abortion, birth control. While we were clearly educated on Catholic beliefs, we actually got to talk about things, and we were free to express our opinions. I think public schools are far more conservative in this regard, which is silly since religion and perceptions of morality are the basis of so many issues of world history and civic conversation.

If I won the lottery, my kids would be in private school in a heartbeat.

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I choose to send my son to a Catholic school because I want him to be steeped in an enviornment that supports the values we hold in our house and doesn't try to change those values. I am a licensed teacher and I was sickened at how my Secondary Education Program was preparing teachers to undermine parents. I also do not like the dumbing down that I have seen very widespread in so many of the public schools around here.

One thing that I DO wish the Catholic schools could focus on that the public schools do pretty well is special education. The Catholic schools and most other private schools simply cannot afford the accomodations necessary to help most special needs students.

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I briefly read through the answers and will try to keep mine brief. I have two kids, both in private Catholic High School now. I love it because of the community, small, parent involvement, etc. Also, I love that they are taught morals and values...so they get it at home and at school. Also, there is no tolerance for screw ups. You don't follow the rules, you are out. We have good schools around here, but I can tell you, I see a huge difference between the public and private....the public school kids seem to grow up faster....date earlier....makeup earlier....and that is not what I wanted for my kids. When you get to middle school, you start seeing a wider variance of parenting, and in our Catholic school, many had similar parenting styles.

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We homeschool... but I would only send my son to public school again in a dire emergency. There are 2 private schools, locally however, that I WOULD send him to. Here's what they have that the public schools don't:

- a decent curriculum
- art
- music
- science
- foreign languages
- field trips
- sports
- clubs
- recess time
- small class size / teacher student ratio
- materials & supplies
- involved parents
- good food
- great play structures
- gifted programs
- special needs programs
- fully stocked library

But wait, you may say... don't the public schools have that? Well... I won't even TOUCH the curriculum which is, quite frankly, pathetic and I could go on for ages but suffice to say if 3rd grade public = prek in private there are MAJOR issues.

- art... 1 week per YEAR (4 hours total) v ARTS! every. single. week. (drawing/painting/ceramics/drama/ computer/ photography/ film)
- music... music got cancelled in our schools, v 3x per week in private
- science... also cancelled (sci teachers sacked) v fully stocked labs & scie teacher
- foreign languages 0 v choice of 4 languages, done daily
- field trips 1 per year (half day, every OTHER year) v 1 (full day) per month
- sports 0 (cancelled) v lots and lots and lots (including ski/snowboard days once a week in winter, and swimming in summer)
- clubs yes/ yes
- recess time 30 min v 1.5 hours (over an 8 hour day for both)
- great play structures ARE at some pub schools, others are rusted to bits and the fields are ankle turners, v the private schools that have great outdoor AND indoor play areas (rainy seattle means you need indoor space)
- small class size / teacher student ratio 1:30+ v 1:12
- materials & supplies public doesn't have them, private does
- involved parents public = the minority, private = the majority
- good food is NOT what is served in our public schools
- gifted programs; 1 hour per WEEK v 8 hours per DAY
- special needs programs 4 hours per week v 8 hours per DAY
- fully stocked library. A lot of the pub librarians have been sacked as well and the 'stock' is limited to a few thousand books, often none as recent as the 90's except what parents have brought in, versus libraries kids can actually learn to RESEARCH in, and use, and check out fiction from that was printed in the last decade and isn't missing half the #s in a series...

Our public schools are "good" because they are low violence, and test in the C range.

Private school vary a LOT... but of the two I would be willing to send my son to... the difference is like a piece of toast for dinner or thanksgiving.

Also... if you've gotten this far: A clear and executed code of conduct. Teachers are *expected* to discipline kids, and those ways and means are outlined. Respect is something that is taught and encourgaed, as are civic duties, humanism, interpersonal relationships, etc. It's not "just teach" and pretend that teachers aren't PARENTING these kids as well. They have them for 8 hours a day from 5 and up. Morality is something that is TAUGHT and outlined as to how it's taught. Versus the roll of the dice with public schools because they aren't "allowed" to teach it, so each teacher wings it according to their own morality. Which puts both teachers and parents in a tight spot because it's a taboo thing to discuss. Versus in most private schools how they go about teaching values, and *what those values are* is VERY clearly defined for both teachers and parents. So when parents are choosing a school, they're able to choose one that lines up with their own moral code.

It should also be noted; I'm not lumping. I went to 10+ public schools myself (military) and some were phenom, and some were highly regrettable. Our local schools are considered "good", but they're in the bottom percentile of schools *I* went to as a child. I'm talking VERY specifically about why I would NOT want to send my son to public school in our area, versus the two private schools I would be willing to send him to. . It's impossible to make a blanket statement about all public, or all private. The above are just MY reasons, for what is available locally. Elsewhere my answer may be extremely different.

It will probably tell you something, as a teacher, when most public teachers in our area send their kids to private school or homeschool. It's not that the schools are bad, it's that they aren't where most people in education want their children educated. The public schools are NOT bad... they're just mediocre, underfunded, understaffed, overcrowded...

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I send my son to a private school because:

1. The local public school is not good. It is scaled below average.
2. The service attitude of the teachers in the private school is excellent. Nothing is too much trouble. My niece who has brittle diabetes went to public school for a while, and the teachers simply would not take her care plan seriously. They could not see that it was a life or death matter. One of the administrative staff at the school actually told my little niece after she (the staff member) had acted incorrectly in relation to the diabetes, 'don't tell your parents'. She now attends the private school my son attends, and all staff are very aware and take their responsibility seriously in relation to my niece's diabetes.
3. My son is shy and has trouble making friends. This is a big issue for me. The private school takes this seriously and facilitate resolutions such as 'friendship groups'.
4. My son is doing well academically, and I want him to be challenged. The private school has a high expectation of their students, and I like this. If expectations are lowered, then I think results will also be lower.
5. The facilities are better. Obviously this is because they have more money. It shows.
6. Pastoral care is important to the school my son attends. I like the care and development of the whole child that they offer.
7. I wanted to send my son to this particular school to give him the best possible start, and make the best possible contacts for his future life.

I would like to finish by saying that I went to public schools for my entire school education. My parents both attended exclusive private schools, but when it came to either a) sending me away to an exclusive private boarding school (there were no private schools near us), or b) sending me to the local public school, they decided on the latter, with the intention to make up for the lack of private schooling by adding to our learning at home. They did this with flying colours. I doubt I'm as good a parent as they were.

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well, I get grief from some of my friends too. First off, my local schools are ok, and if i had to, I would have to send my child there. My child attended the daycare at the school so that is how i got involved. I used to work in both public and private, and for educational and personal growth and spiritual reasons I liked the private Christian schools. The one thing I must say is that, I love the fact that someone prays for my child on a daily basis and my child has grown to learn to pray for others. My child at the age of 7 knows that, if she cant count on anyone or if no one is available at that time when she needs help, she turns to her spiritual source. Education is indeed important in the world today, but with all that is going on, I want my child to have her education incorporated with a spiritual component. Even when my child needs a bit of assistance, she says a little prayer and life goes on. Must you send your child to a private school to get this....No but I feel it is an individual decision However, I do know some that send their kids there for "status" reasons.... now that is horrible. Hope that helps! keep me posted! Good luck...and remember, do what is best for you, ur children, and ur family. People will ALWAYS have something to say!!!!!

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I hope you get a variety of answers for this question.

* My daughter is in Pre-K and is way advanced. (Not the "it will level out in Kindergarten advanced", but would be bored to death in 1st grade advanced) She goes to a progressive school, emergent, project based so she can learn at her own pace because of the small class size and maintain her love of learning with very little external motivation. In a public setting she would have to wait until 2nd grade for GATE classes.

* I have a really tough time with the reward system in public elementary. I don't get treating kids like dogs and getting rewarded for what kids are already able to do, given their own pace. Maybe because of who my daughter is, the idea of teaching kids rather than fostering their own innate curriosity doesn't set well with me. And rewarding for behavior, I'm even more against.

* My daughter is a true introvert and what serves us well is that she gets so much in school that we don't do extracurriculars any more out of school: Music 2 p/ week, Spanish 2 p/ week, Art daily, Recess 3x p/ day, gardening 2 p/ week, Library 1 p/ week, PE 2 p/ week which includes learning about both individual goals setting and team work, aside from the reading, writing, and math. And all of that sounds like a lot, but the child and their interests are fostered through play which is the language of children.

* There is no one right way to do something. Each child learns from the other because we all have our own different way of learning. My daughter is visual, others Kinesthetic, some logical, some intuitive--all ways of arriving at a question or possible outcome are valued.

* There is a lot of structure but freedom within that structure. Not, here's a worksheet. This is what we're doing and we're all working on that right now. There are no bells, there is opportunity to finish projects that were started earlier in the week or day.

* There is also social curriculum which teaches her how to negociate social situations and learn how to advocate for herself. She lives in her head and needs guidance to verbalize what she wants. There is a very specific structure in place that teaches kids how to be cooperative with one another.

In the higher grades they are exposed to even more amazing programs: music lab, science labs, algebra and calc studied on the basketball courts using chalk, community consciousness, etc.

I want to say that I never thought I would put my daughter in a private school. I had wonderful public schooling but I was not academically inclined (read daughter much more cerebral than I) and it was 30 years ago. But as I've studied Psychotherapy, Education, Learning Theory and now having my very unique daughter ( who wakes up before me and can be found at her writing table each morning ) I've made choices and sacrifies I feel are worth it. I do NOT care if she goes to an Ivy League or college period, but I do want to give her this foundation now because I feel like once she's in high school, she's going to be able to fly in which ever direction she chooses.

Wow, my longest answer to date.

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This is our first year, we have a 7 yr old boy in 2nd grade, 6 yr old girl in K, & a 4 yr old girl in pre-k....our reasons are:

* Christian based education
*Smaller class room sizes
*I am able to volunteer much easier
*Curriculum is more challenging
*My son is very shy & quiet & was getting *lost* in the public school
*Teachers at Private School seem to be more positive/better attitude & easier to get along with~IMO
*Don't have to worry about strikes or the mentality of 'Teachers don't make enough'
*Stricter discipline
*Public schools are much more left leaning & we are a right leaning family
*Private schools encourage kids to be part of groups & not as 'clicky'
*As for sports, everyone is welcome & encouraged to participate

My son has excelled already this school year, he has come out of his shell a great deal & feels like he has a voice now. Our Public schools are very good schools & we pay a lot in property taxes. But we are much happier at the Christian Schools, hope we can continue, but if not, we'll just put them back in public school.

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My son, now 21, went to a public school through 5th grade. I won't go into the details of the issues we had, but we made the decision to put him and our daughter in a private school. The school we chose is a non-religious, college-prep school. Our son went there from 6-12th grade. Our daughter currently is a junior and started there in 1st grade.

Initially our thought was smaller classes, more structure and better communication. And honestly, our decision was based primarily on our son. But now that our daughter has gone all the way through we realize she thrived as well in the environment for different reasons.

So in addition to the smaller classes and structure other reasons we kept our children there are:
- Accountability. Everyone is accountable for what goes on in the school from the Board of Trustees down to the maintenance staff. And I know I can call anyone with a question/concern or even a compliment.
- Curriculum is probably the biggest reason we kept the kids there.
Our school tends to teach 1-2 full grade levels above the local public systems. This was very evident to me when the kids were in middle school. My daughter's was learning in 6th grade science what the 8th grade neighbors were learning. And when our son started there in 6th grade, he was reading things in English what was in the 8th grade curriculum in a different local public system. Kids start taking a foreign language in kindergarten and have computer classes 2-3 days a week in lower school, then a laptop program for daily use/work starting in middle school. My daughter, as a junior, is taking a college level Business Finance class.
- Community - in a smaller school, it is a true community feel. Our kids have friends from different grade levels as do my husband and I. When our son was a senior, one of his dear friends was a sophomore.
- Diversity - I know there can be quite a bit of diversity in large schools, but again in a smaller environment, you are much more aware of it. My kids have friends of different religions, cultures and countries.
- Teacher Caliber - The bad apples don't last.
- Sports - OK, I'll admit this is not a priority for me. And being a small private school we are not an athletic power house. BUT, every kid has an opportunity to do what they want or interests them. It is not a pay to play system and no one is cut. Last year we almost didn't have a softball team, so a couple of the tennis girls joined the team so the softball girls would at least get a chance to play. *Again that sense of community! ;) They had never played before, but the did a great job and had fun!

For the record, we live in an area with highly rated public schools. And I have the utmost respect for teachers. As a nurse myself, I think nurses and teachers are probably 2 of the most under-valued professions. But it was due to my son's 5th grade teacher, and the lack of response and accountability from the principal and school that threw us over the edge and why we turned to a private school.

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I started at a private school because it was a quality school, smaller classes and it had a Christian basis which my parents liked. We had to leave when we moved. Public school in 5th grade was a culture shock. It wasn't a bad school, but little things like being HUGE (30 kids in my reading class, nobody caring if you lost your gloves - someone likely stole them).

My stepkids started at a private school because it was a quality school, smaller classes and had a good reputation. We have pretty good local schools, too, and they completed their educations there (we had to pull them from the private school due to finances). I didn't have a hand in picking the school, but both kids still talk about their time there. It was a nice environment. Sometimes it's just a matter of resources. My SD's elementary school struggled to keep chorus and band due to budget cuts. One of her current classes has almost 40 students in it. Many schools that rely more on federal funding are teaching to test vs allowing teachers to teach how they want. My SD takes tests that are created at the district level, so if her teacher didn't get through all the material, it's crammed at the end because it's on the final. Interesting projects are fewer because there's so much required ground to cover. Friend of ours is a 1st grade teacher of 30 years and is facing the overhaul of her lessons not because she's a bad teacher but because of politics and funding. It's frustrating for both teachers and students. Here they also push AP because it scores the schools as "better/more challenging" nevermind that some students burn out or should never be in AP to begin with.

Ideally, there is a private Christian school locally that I would love to send DD to, but I doubt we will be able to afford it.

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I haven't made a decision yet, but I am in the same boat you are in - my daughter will be in kindergarten next year and we have a decision to make. Our public school system is "good enough" - I keep hearing mixed opinions from different people, and some have not been happy with it. On the other hand, others state that their kids did fine, and it's really more about how involved the parents are in their kids' education, and if they make it a priority. I have mixed feelings about it, in that it's the same public school system I attended and I did fine, but others have said that times have changed and they would never put their kids in this school system. My friend's son was in 8th grade last year at our local middle school and while she was okay with the curriculum and the teachers and how her son was doing, she got really frustrated that other students didn't take their school work as seriously as he did, and they, and their discipline issues, were more of a distraction and made it harder on her son to get more out of his classes. She decided for high school to have him go to a different district and she's noticed a huge difference. But that's just her opinion, and others feel differently.

There is a small private school that we just visited this past weekend that we are considering for our daughter. It also happens to be Catholic, although it is not exclusively Catholic, and they have several non-Catholic students there (including Jewish, Muslim, and Hindu). My concerns with public schools in general include lack of discipline (not on the teachers part, but more having to deal with students that are not effectively disciplined at home), large class sizes, and things like P.E., art and music being cut because of a shrinking budget. I also am concerned about the emphasis on standardized testing and that teachers are forced to teach the students how to take a multiple choice test that will get them the most right answers, as opposed to deductive reasoning and critical thinking skills. At the private school that we are considering, the class sizes are much smaller, and all the kids are there because their parents really care about the education they are getting and expect more, both from them, and the school and teachers themselves. The curriculum is more accelerated and demanding then what is typically found in most public schools. The school follows the International Baccalaureate program from kindergarten through 12th grade. Depending on the grade they are in (K - 5), they get art instruction, music and P.E. once to twice a week, as well as Spanish 3 to 5 days a week and computer instruction 2 to 3 days a week. They do get daily religious instruction as part of the Catholic curriculum so it seems they try to teach better morals as well and expect better behavior from the students. We are not strongly religious ourselves, but that does not mean I don't expect a certain level of behavior from my daughter, or don't teach her strong morals, and I like the idea that it will be reinforced by her school. There are many sports teams, extracurricular activities and clubs available. All students are required to put in a certain amount of volunteer work each month. And they are all required to wear uniforms, so no issues with "rich kids" having nicer clothes than "poor kids", no annoying or distracting clothing trends, like jeans worn down around the butt or girls cleavage popping out (I know many public schools have dress codes but it seems without uniforms in place, the rules are rather loosely enforced - if at all).

Coincidentally our neighbors have their daughter attend kindergarten there now - they are not particularly religious themselves, and they could not be happier with the education their child is getting, and how the school is run and how the students conduct themselves. At this school, it's "cool to be a nerd" and I'm not sure how many public schools are out there that can say that.

As far as tuition costs, they are not cheap. We can afford it, and save for college, but DH is wondering if the money would be better spent fattening up the college fund even further. We just really wonder if the extra cost is really worth it in the long run and haven't made up our minds yet. Because of this, I would be interested in hearing what others have to say.

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IMO: to me- (where "I" live anyway, I CAN NOT voice my opinion on another area)

-it's a smaller, more organized school
-Being the school is smaller, with less children, the director/principal is more on top of things
-the classrooms are more one on one
-parents are more involved
-the school is cleaner
- It's a christian school, so they instill a little more religion in the classroom
-the teachers get paid more, so "sometimes" they care more
- the students come from a more stable home life where one or both parents are very involved in their childs life
-I feel he's safer there

We do have some GREAT public schools around us, but for now, I feel more comfortable with him in a private Christian school...

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For me it's very simple. I send my children to Christian school because I want them to get a Christian education. I like that my children have weekly chapel, daily devotions and say the pledge of allegiance. I want my children to grow up loving God and country. They learn that God made and loves all people and that they are showing their love for God by taking care of others. I know that people can be ethical and moral outside of the Judeo-Christian tradition, but I see no reason to ban Christ from the classroom of children growing up in a Christian household.

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For us it is a religious education mixed with quality secular studies. But I'd say one of the key factors is the ability to feel like your child is an individual and not a number being filed through a big system. I went to several types of educational styles growing up and for me, being able to ask questions and to be taught to my learning style made all the difference in how I learned and what I learned. I can see in my children that they do better when their individuality can come through in a class. My kids are amazing to me. That said, they are not ever going to be top of their classes, nor bottom of the barrel, they are very good students who very easily could fall through the cracks, and not get nurtured and challenged, helping them remain the creative individuals they are. A school is only as good as the classroom teacher and the student's styles matching. A right teacher can teach anything to a student, and with a bad match, nothing can be taught or learned.

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Our children attend a private Catholic school and we absolutley love it! There is such a sense of community there and the kids seem to be much like a large family. We love that they can receive not only a great education, but also have our family values and faith reinforced on a daily basis. With the way the world is today, it was a no brainer for us to send our children to private school. We feel it is the best way to give them a strong as rock foundation before they head out into the "real world".

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My child is in private preschool because there is no other choice in this area. The school he attends this year seems very good so far. The private school nursery program he attended last year was very badly run (so bad that they wound up closing at the end of the year).

I'm looking forward to him attending public school for kindergarten next year. In both private schools I have felt like we are constantly being hit up for more and more money. I take it that it's quite expensive to run a private school, but the tuition is already so expensive. Some parents here are quite well off, but most seem solidly middle class and are having a hardship meeting all the costs.

I might consider private school again when my son gets to high school, if I feel he is not getting a rigorous enough education. However, I do believe a lot of learning comes down to the parents. My siblings and I attended a very middling public high school with some pretty awful teachers. Fortunately, my parents were involved enough to assign separate reading lists for us at home. By the time I was 13 or 14, I was reading a lot of adult classics and had a pretty expansive vocabulary. My sister went on to an excellent state school and my brother and I both graduated from top tier colleges (Ivy and Seven Sisters). I'm not sure we would have done any better with a private education.

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I found that the public schools in my area are overcrowded and so are the charter schools. I chose the private school because it is much smaller than the regular schools. My daughter never went to pre k or daycare so I didn't want her overwhelmed. She loves her school and is very happy there, she is also excelling way beyond what I thought she would.

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1. smaller classrooms
2. more one on one attention
3. community feel
4. our public school is way below average.
5. one of my neighbors is a public school teacher. from the day I have met her, I have heard her say she hates teaching and the only reason she does it is because it pays so well (long island teachers are overpaid in my opinion).
6. religion was never a reason for us to send to a catholic school. i like that they learn about God but wish it would be toned down a bit.

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I would love to send mine to private school! For now, I am going to educate them at home. My reasoning is that we are a Christian family and the private schools we would consider all have a Christian world view. For me when my children are so young I don't want them exposed to so many other world views. It is different when they are older and have their foundation set. Then they will have the maturity to weigh things out and figure out what they think about things. But as very young children I want their exposure to all kinds of ideologies more limited. Plus I want to teach them a lot of things that I think would not be covered in public school, simply because of the number of students that have to be taught by one person. Like we are Dave Ramsey people, he has material called 'Financial Peace Jr.' teaching kids all about the value of money, giving, spending and saving. I want my kids to grow up knowing how to use money well. I think it will be much easier to incorporate that into my lessons than having them have more work to do after a long day out at school. My kids will all be in Martial Arts, I like the fact that they will be able to get their work done earlier in the day, have time for chores and still be able to train in MA, without everything being crammed into the last few hours of the evening. So in that respect I actually prefer home based education even to private school. My kids will have more time to pursue more things and still have family life. But I will say I am grateful for public school, bc plenty of kids need it! I had a single mom and went to public school and thank goodness we live in a country where it is freely available.

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I sent my youngest DD to a private (very expensive) preschool ($400 a month for a 2 day program). I chose it b/c it was an amazing place inside and out. They had a farm area, ponds, grew their own veggies, had a pool, etc. But, after a month, I found the teachers subpar and didn't like the teacher's aids, so we quit and I started my own preschool from home.
If I were to put my kids in private in the future, it would be for more religious freedom and education for them. I like our public school just fine though, so that is where they will stay for now.

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I am putting my daughter in a private preschool because it is Christian and she will have "Bible time" daily. Also, they teach them manners (including table manners, etc.) She will learn handwriting pre-K. My biggest concern is the transition from private to public. Everyone has their own reasoning and I think you are doing the best you can and wish you well. Glad to hear the public schools in your area are parent friendly with art ... :)

I am doing private school for my daughter this year (Pre-K) because she completed a preschool program (already knew half of what they taught before she started), was ready for K but due to her birthday was not allow to start. Her preschool director and teachers said "she would be too bored" to attend again. I found one that taught from the same hand writing book that she had already used which meant it wouldn't be strange to her and they have the ability to challenge her (because they are a school that goes to 8th grade) when she needs it. She's loving it and the teacher says how great she is doing. I would have had daycare/preschool one way or another so this was our best option. I can't afford it long term so next year she will attend our local public school.

Some people choose private schools due to education or more one on one attention/smaller class size. Some for location. Some for religion. Some do it for the lack of diversity vs going to a public school...sad to say but true.