When to Start Kindergarten

My son is 5 as of July 14th, and we're starting him. Our pediatrician and countless teachers I've talked to say that the biggest indicator of success is that the child is able to sit and focus for reasonable periods of time. This is hard to test, but to help you gauge, my son sits quietly listening intently while we read him pictureless chapter books like Harry Potter. I'm also a little bit freaked out, but since he is reading simple books, writing letters and stringing together notes, I'm thinking he'd be bored to tears being held back. Best of luck with your decision.

My triplets turned 6 in August and we are just starting Kindergarten and I'm so happy we made the decision to hold them back. They are completely ready for it now and so much further ahead than they were this time last year. Most of all they are emotionally ready to manage an 8 hour day with 20 children per class 5 days a week with what seems to be an intensive learning curve during this important first school year. You have to question if your child is ready for this and if you think he is then send him. If there is the slightest doubt hold him back - it won't do him, or you any harm.

Since your son is not yet 5 you may have to have him tested to see if he can enter kindergarten in September. If the test says that he is ready then by all means go for it!!! I am sure he will love it

Hi S.,

I was a first grade teacher for 8 years before having kids. From my experience I had boys with summer birthdays that were just fine, and then I had boys who should have been held back. It is usually a maturity issue with boys, not an academic one, since they have a tendency to have more trouble sitting still for long periods of time. My suggestion is that if you are concerned maybe you could look into a montesorri school, or a private school that has 1/2 day kindergarten and then he could go to full day kinder next year. It certainly won't hurt him to do kinder twice and it would be better in the long run to be the oldest in his class than the youngest. In fact that is what my parents did with my brother because his birthday is in August. It worked out really well for him.
That being said, if that is not an option, then you will have to decide if you think he is mature enough for school. Can he sit and concentrate for long periods of time?

I hope this is helpful. Good luck with your decision!

L.

I believe that legally he has to start this year, which I think in MD is next week (?). I would talk to the school. They can provide a test and evaluate him. The only other exception to him having to start K this school year is if he was in a pre-school, and the pre-school teachers have suggested that he be held back.
M.

That was backward I think, sending him the September after he turns 5 would make him the youngest...but anyways. Personally, I would wait until the next year. Just barely 5 is still pretty young. Even if he is academically, socially and emotionally ready. I think boys just do need a little extra time before starting Kindergarten. I sent my son to Kindergarten when he was 5 (he has an April birthday, so one of the youngest, but not as young as yours will be) because he was academically, socially and emotionally ready, but, like the other poster said, he wasn't ready to sit still and wasn't ready to focus intently on something that didn't interest him (which is very normal for boys at this age). Of course, I wasn't impressed with public schools from the start and decided to homeschool for first grade and beyond, but that's a separate issue. All through his Kindergarten year before that decision was made, I wished I'd given him one more year. He was basically ready (he's what I call an "old soul" child, very articulate, almost like a miniature adult) but I still think Kindergarten was a bit much for him that year.

Just my two cents and experience, I'm sure others will have different opinions and I look forward to reading them.

Hi

If you feel your son would benefit from being in school with other kids but are not too worried about the academic side of it then why not send to a half K programme. A full day is a long day for a child of 5. My son went to full day K last year and he was 5 in June and I think he was not ready for a full day , by lunch time he was restless and his behaviour went down hill in the PM & the amount of work they did was very surprising to me , but he did enjoy going and meeting new friends , I just think he would have benefited more if he came home at lunch time.

Good Luck

K.

The schools do a screening to make sure that kids are ready for kindergarten but at the same time I think you need to know your child. I am having the same thoughts as my son was born in June and I want to make sure that he doesn't fall behind. If you really believe that he is academically and socially as ready as a child born in January and February then I would say let him go to kindergarten, you can always have him repeat kindergarten with no stigma effect. Also remember ha kindergarten in this area is only half a day. You could also put him in a private kindergarten that is a full day and then if you feel he needs another year you have it without him becoming friends with the kids who would have been in his grade. Just some fod for thought...

If you think he is ready, put him in. I have an August birthday boy (turns 8 on Saturday). I think he would have been bored silly at daycare another year. He also wouldn't be able to handle not being like his friends. If you have any doubts and trust your daycare director ask for their opinion. If you know anyone who is a teacher in elem. school you can ask them their opinion if they interact with your son regularly.

My son starts third grade in a few weeks. I think we made the right decision. He is doing well in all of his work. He makes friends. He has some immaturity and likes to stand and do his work. However, that is not an age thing it is an ADD issue that we just got diagnosed. If we held him back a year I think we would have had a lot more stress because he would have felt different in several ways. As for issues later on; you can never know if/when they will occur and why.

I was worried about starting him and my mom, who was a reading teacher, told me he was ready.

--Just my two cents

Hi Stehpani - I think you might want to check with the school. I thought that once a child is of age it is compulsary to send them. I just have not heard of anyone holding their kids back and waiting a year anymore. I thought once your child is old enough you have to send them to school or you could be in trouble with the local DSS.

My son's birthday is in August. When he was in preschool, I knew he would be ready to start Kindergarten. He is one of the youngest but he is extremely successful in school. He is going into 2nd grade in September and I do not regret my decision one bit. I don't know what will happen in middle or even high school but I figure that I will cross that bridge when I get to it.

Every one I know started their children in Kindergarten at 4 or 5 if their birthday was before the cut off, which is late September or early October. I have never really known of anyone starting their child at 6 unless there was health problems or some sort of delay. Starting at 5 seems routine enough to me. Most of everyone from generation X started at 5 or sometimes 4.

My son also has a July b-day and I had some concerns about him being the youngest in the class. The majority of his class had Sept.-Feb. B-day's so they were all turning 6 while Brendan had just turned 5, but he did very well and grew up so much. I definately suggest you starting him when he turns 5 unless you have academic concerns. He will do fine and really there is no reason to hold a child back. If you are like me you will be more nervous then him. GOOD LUCK!

I agree with the other responses that it all depends on your particular child, but just to give you my experience- My oldest son has a b-day at the end of August. He just made the age cut-off to start kindergarten by about 4 days! I felt that he was ready and he did very well this past school year. He excelled academically and socially, even though he had a period of about 4-5 days during the second week of school where he cried because he didn't want to go. It was short-lived and he got over it. Only time will tell how the rest of his school years will play out, but I'm not concerned.

You don't mention whether you are putting your son in pre-k this year? It may be a good idea, so you can get a feel for how he'll do in a half-day program. The pre-k teacher can also offer you some professional insight as to his maturity level and "kindergarten readiness."

Hi S.!

My son, who just completed kindergarten, was one of the youngest in his class. He loved going to school and excelled both academically and socially. I really think it all depends on the individual child. If he is ready, I would send him. Both my brother and I were some of the youngest kids in our classes and we had no problems as we went through school. In fact, some of our (still!) closest friends were made in middle and high school.

K. :-)

I really don't understand why so many parents want to mess around with the start dates for the children to begin kindergarten. The schools set a cut-off date - if your child meets the cut-off, then he is ready, unless he has some delay that should be accounted for. My son turns 5 on Sept. 30 (next year), which is the cut-off for our area and you'd better believe he is starting kindergarten then. He is already looking forward to it. Why would I want to pay for daycare for another year?

My son will be in the same boat and we have already started thinking about whether to hold him back in a few years. I was the youngest in my class growing up and it was very hard. I always felt a step behind. My daughter is an Oct birthday so she will be starting kingergarten this year at almost 6 yrs old. The difference in maturity between last year when she was just turning 5 and now is amazing. There are also several kids in her preschool class that are turning 6 a few days after the start of kindergarten so if you do hold him back I wouldn't worry about him being too much older. I was amazed at the number of kids that were repeating pre-K at my son's preschool, so it is becoming more and more common. What does your son's preschool teacher think? they can usually give a good indication of whether he will do well next year. One of the things we have thought of if there is a question is to put my son in a private kindergarten and if he does well, then he can go on to 1st grade, if he doesn't, he can repeat kindergarten in the public school the next year. In MD, kindergarten is a long full day, so if he isn't ready, I wouldn't push him. Good luck in your decision.

I have successfully homeschooled three boys, two are in the service and one just finished high school. I have another boy and girl in high school which I still teach. Here is my two cents:
Boys do better holding them back, yes they may be ready now, but you are right to worry about middle school, because that is exactly what happened with mine. I started the oldest who had a late Sept bday just before he was five and had no trouble until sixth grade. The fourth one had and Oct bday and I started him the following year and it was just so much better for him as he got older.
Mind you I had more flexibility as a homeschooler, but remember that schools segregate by academic level in the upper grades and the groups on lower rungs tend to be where the discipline problems are...
About me: Mom of 5, ages 21-15.

I think it depends on the child. My daughter started when she was 3 months past turning 5, she has a June birthday. She was ready to go the year before...but we were not able to send her. I think if he is ready for it, go ahead and send him! He will either be one of the older or younger kids in the class, but a lot will depend on him and what you guys do with him at home as well.

My son turns 5 on September 2 and he starts K on the 8th! I agree with the poster who said "the biggest indicator of success is that the child is able to sit and focus for reasonable periods of time." My son is not a rough-and-tumble boy and does not risk being labeled ADHD. He's probably ready for 1st grade academically and prefers to play with older children. Another consideration is the alternative. If my son stays at his Montessori daycare, he will have been in the same class for 3 years straight and will be the oldest of 3, 4 and 5 yr olds. He is also truly done napping, so full-day K should not be a problem. Finally, he will attend a Fairfax County school with a large proportion of underpriviledged kids where families tend to send them according to the Sept 30 age cut-off. At his kindergarten assessment, the teacher said there would be lots of other young 5 yr olds in K. Redshirting is more common in affluent school districts with parents who want their kids to be at the top of their class (and sports later) - and who can afford another year of private preschools and daycares. But that doesn't mean it's the best thing to do. When I was a kid, school came too easily for me and I never learned good study habits as a result. Being at the top of your class has its disadvantages.

Hi S.,
Our sons turns five early Nov. & if I could I would put him in school this fall. He already knows a lot of the things they teach in kidergarten anyway. But because we do miss the cut off he is going to a private preschool pre-k, and the school said when he turns 5, they will switch him to the kindergarten classroom. I want him to learn as much as can, as young as he can, since they say thats's when they learn the easiest. But in the end you know your child better then anyone and you'll make the best decision for him I am sure.

The older the better. Wait til your son is five. Child developmental psychologists recommend that boys don't start school until age 7 or 8. Unfortunately our society doesn't allow this. Boys especially suffer learning problems when pushed too early to school. AF

Legally since he will be 5 before September, he is supposed to go to school. You say you think he is ready....why hold him back? I had kids early in school and also one late starting school.....the one late starting school was way ready and was in so much of an outcast because of his being a "GEEK" and was so much younger than the kids in his classes.

Good luck

I think it depends on the child. Some are ready at five, others do better closer to six. You know your child best. My son's birthday is Oct 27. Where we are, the county says they have to be 5 yrs old on or before Sept 30 to start kindergarten. So the choice was sort of made for us. He's one of the oldest in his class (there are a few kids with earlier Oct birthdays), and the tallest and he's a straight A student. We had him in Montessori from 3 1/2 through kindergarten and we feel it was a great transition for him from a daycare setting to a school/classroom setting. Where we grew up, you could start kindergarten if you would turn 5 before Dec 31. My sister started when she was 4 (her birthday being Oct 9), but I think she would have done better if my Mom had held her back a year. She had some maturity issues which that one extra year would have helped a great deal.

S.,

As a mother, who started her daughter as a young five (Sept. birthday) to a school Principal who saw both young and older kindergarteners, to a grandmother who waited until my grandson was 6, I feel I have a perspective to share with you.

In today's world, while society and "Educators" want to tell you that you should have your child in structured learning by 3 or 4, I will tell you the truth. Your child needs you to be their tether until they are old enough to handle the weight of society. That is not to say you cannot expose them to classes or groups, but they need you.

My position is that our children today are faced with pressures and decisions that we didn't have until much older, even at the kindergarten level. They need to be equipped in character (which is taught at the home) to be able to successfully navigate the cesspool out there.

Little boys develop somewhat behind girls physiologically, so that alone places them behind the curve if you start them too young. Their dexterity and focus development alone will be a frustration factor with rare exception.

While I taught my grandson phonetics and reading as well as critical thinking, (He and my daughter lived with me) I didn't start actual kindergarten with him until he was six. He turned six in June and he began K the following Sept.

It has been a good decision, for now he has had great success and feels good about himself. We opted to home school, but the principle is the same regardless.

I hope you will listen to that wisdom inside of you. The fact that you are questioning it is telling.

I hope it is clear to you soon, and I am happy to share the truth...

I have a daughter who also has a July birthday. I did start her in kindergarten as soon as possible because she was ready. If I could do it over I would have waited another year. She is now newly 13 and will be going into the 8th grade. It is very difficult for both of us. Most of the other students are late 13 and 14 years old and even some that are 15. Meaning that they are more mature and of course wearing make up and some even dating. I do not feel that to be appropriate for her age and she doesn't understand why I am so strict. She also still likes to play barbies and polly pockets (secretly) while most of the other kids are into horror movies, texting, and doing most things unsupervised. It is a very hard decision to make. I certainly wish I had waited. Please feel free to contact me if you have any other questions. Good Luck.

I'm getting to this late but I wanted to respond. We had been back and forth. Our son is an August birthday. A couple things helped influence our decision to start him in kindergarten at 6. I have 2 siblings that were August birthdays who STRUGGLED in school. I don't think there is any merit for our son to be a 17 year old graduate and flounder around for a couple years like my brother did. But still - we parent differently and our son is an only child and very bright, outgoing and physically adept. He's even taller than most kids his age - so what to do? Then I talked to a friend who is an elementary school teacher. She teaches 4th grade. All of a sudden a group starts having trouble, focus, comprehension, socially, etc. she said that you can predect the problem. They go check the files and sure enough - it's the boys who have late in the year birhtdays. All of a sudden the lack of maturity rears it's head. So they all start out on a level playing field - but around 3rd or 4th grade this happens. We are not starting our child in kindergarten till he's 6 with that information.

I am a teacher with a little one in the same situation. In fact, I
was in the same boat when I was small! I have spoken to quite
a few teachers about it. You know your kid the best. If you feel
he is not ready, let him be for another year. The older kids
tend to be more advanced and have less behavior problems.
In my very unscientific study, this leads to less referrals to
special education and increased academic confidence. It was
not a problem for me in school and as a middle school teacher I see
a relatively wide span in age (not counting kids who were retained.)

My daughter's birthday is in July as well. I'm not sure where you live, but in MD children must be 5 by September 1 in order to attend school in the same year. If you hold him back a year, he would be six when he started, actually making him older than the other children in kindergarten. If he is ready, you should send him. I experienced no problems. In fact, because my daughter finished college one year early, at age 20 (she had not had her 21st birthday), when she graduated from law school in May of 2001, she was actually the youngest person in her graduating class, age 23. Any child who has a birthday after the end of the school year will always be younger than the other children.

get him into a nice preshool when hes 4 and he should be ready. i always think about the last year they will be in school. if you hold him back he will be 18 his whole senior year. you wont have as much hold on him then. we all like to think they will stay young and obedient little kids but they do grow up and i am dreading the 6 months mine will be 18 while in high school. besides if he doesnt do well in kindergarten he can always repeat it...but at least he would have tried.

I work at an Elementary School. I have worked with Kindergartners and am now in the Special Ed Department. I also have two boys. They are twins and their b-day is July 5th. I can tell you that Kindergarten is so demanding these days with all the academics and lack of social and free play, Most teachers don't even have a rest period for the kids. Just imagine taking a child, a boy at that, and putting him in a class that requires him to SIT and listen for 7 hours. They do have a 45 minute recess and about 30 minutes of "free play" but that is it. Even lunch time is so structured that they are not allowed to move around. I have seen many kids, mostly boys, who will "act out" in the class throughout the day and I feel this is because they have so much energy that is being surpressed and they are releasing it in a negative way. These days that can actually lead to the child being "labeled" due to his actions in Kindergarten. Of course, it depends on the school, the teacher, the administration, etc. The school I work at has 2 ED classes (K-3 and 3-5). Their are a total of about 20 kids in these two classes and they are all boys. Now, to answer your question, I would absolutely leave your son out an extra year. If you want to do something, put him in the pre-school within your school system. It is free and it is half day and it will prepare them greatly for Kindergarten without throwing them into a fire. I plan on putting my boys in the September after their 6th birthday. They will be the oldest in the class and yes, they may get bored with some of the teaching, and yes this could cause them to act out too. Where I work, even in Kindergarten, a kid can take some first grade subjects if they are that far ahead. It is just a matter of sending them across the hall for 45 minutes during math time, etc. and then back to their class they go. Most likely, it will all work out in a few years. Meaning, the child and the academics will eventually blend and they will be comfortable in the class they are in with the academics that are being taught. Maybe the learning will be that much easier for them. Hope this helps.