71 answers

When to Allow My Daughter to Have Her Ears Pierced

This topic is a little tame given the various body parts one sees with piercing, but my daughter, who will be 7 in May, has asked to have her ears pierced. My husband and I wanted a "pulse check" to see when most parents allow ear-piercing.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Thanks everyone for your feedback!

My daughter wants to have her ears pierced because Mommy wears them, and because clip-ons pinch too much after a certain time.

I think we'll tell her that she may have them done as incentive for good behavior at school - if she gets a good report card on that aspect. [Which means it may be a goodly while before she gets them, but that's another post...]

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Well my daughters had there ears pierced since they was about 1 years old that way they dont remeber the pain. They are now 19 and 11. So I would say go for it.

Hi C., normally little girls get their ears pieced around three months. At that time, they do have enough shots where they will be ok. Ask her doctor.

When my girls expressed their desire I told them all that is required to take care of their ears...and that they would have to be responsible for that...anyway...even though I did most the work and had to hear them complain when I cleaned them that is what they agreed on! So, with that said...my girls had their ears pierced at 5 & 6 years!...I did have numbing cream though so that helped, but if you don't use that I'd explain that they'll feel pain!

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We started thinking about this issue ever since our 9 year old daughter asked us the same question -- she was around 7, the same age as your daughter. My husband and I were suprised to see so many 2nd and 3rd grade girls getting their ears pierced and we had always assumed that it would happen when she was 13 or 14. What we told our daughter is that the decision has to be based on her ability to take care of her body. Once she is able (and willing) to take care of herself (baths, hair washing and brushing, teeth flossing, etc), then she can have her ears pierced. She seems to understand our logic and has accepted it for now.
I would guess that we'll let her pierce them by the time she's 11 or 12. Good luck to you!
S. R.

It seems as though you have lost of advice already, but I will give mine just the same. I myself had my ears pierced when I was five and my daughters were pierced at one and a half. She is now seven and still has her ears pierced. One thing that I would suggest though is using nickle free earrings. I am allergic to nickel so I chose to have my daughter wear nickel free just in case. I had to have my ears re-pierced so many times growing up because they would get infected and close up due to the nickel and they did not have nickel free earrings then. Anyhow, if you think that your daughter is ready and responsible enough to have her ears pierced then I would say go ahead.

Let her do it when you think she is responsible enough to clean and take care of her ears and earrings. I let my daughter when she was nine, but I wish I would have waited. She loses the earrings all of the time! She's just that kind of kid. If your daughter is responsible, she's ready. I just knew that with her two younger siblings, I couldn't be the one responsible for taking care of her ears.

This is a very harmless way to express herself and be able to wear jewelry. If this is something you'd prefer her to wait till she were older then you set the limits of how old she needs to wait.
Our two girls, now 19 and 21, had their ears pierced when they were young but when they turned 18, they decided to do get several ear piercings, the belly button done and both proudly wear very loud tatoos none of which is something I would want for myself.lol.

I had my daughters ears pierced when she was 4 months old. Our pediatrician did it, I gave her some tylenol, she went to sleep, done deal. The younger the better in my case.

hi C.,

being a former salon owner in NY, i will just give you some insight and hopefully this will help you and your husband make your decision.

I think its great that your daughter wants to be taking care of herself in a fashionable way. she will have to understand that the piercing is done with a gun and will feel a little sharp pinch and then have to do it again with the other ear. she will need some tylenol afterwards when she goes to bed and that should do it. see if they can numb it before they pierce her.

After that she will need your help in keeping them clean while she heals. everyday she is to take either the solution they give you or some alcohol, spin the earrings around in the hole, so the hole will heal, and clean out the sticky residue in the beginning. in 3-4 weeks, her ears will heal wonderfully if she takes good care of them. If she does not, the skin will grow on the earring and hurt her when she has to spin them later on. Its all up to her and you how she will take care of this. she has to have nice clean hands when she does this, but personally, i think its a really nice way for a girlie bonding between you and your daughter.

I would recommend gold earrings. the ones they use with the machine are gold covered and fine. after a month i would purchase a nice set of post or small hoop earrings that are gold through the ear. NEVER USE COSTUME JEWELRY FOR INFECTIONS WILL BEGIN...you can get them at a really good price and find nice designs at wal-mart. Ask them for the earring collection for children.

when she gets them pierced, make sure everything is done in order; sanitizing, gun is cleansed, earrings come out of the packet in front of you and they are wearing gloves. You are dealing with blood here so she does not need to have anything transferred. But if you go to a good spa/salon that has a very good reputation, she will be just fine. have a licensed haridresser do the piercing.

take pictures and go out to lunch afterwards-- just you and her. she is your daughter and its a precious 'rite of passage' from you to her.

as far as getting upper ear, tongue, lip, cheek, nose, eyebrow and all that, i would not allow it. these do not leave a good impression on people when later on she wants to get a job to work for college nor good for business as an adult. a 3rd hole is just fine. when i got rid of mine, it just closed and left no permanent hole.

my vote is yes and what a wonderful way for her to enjoy her femininity.

blessings, L.

I think 8 years old is a good time for girls to get their ears pieced. My sister and I got ours done when we were 8 and my sister has done that with each of her 3 daughters and it's worked well. I think with such things it's always good to have ages set up for milestones for girls and boys.

For example: heels for girls, dating and so forth. It's nice to have things to look forward to as the years pass by.

Hope that helps.

The rule in my house was 12. I hated it but looking back at least my parents were consistent. I wanted them to cave so badly but they didn't and I think that was the important thing. Since my parents were pretty strict I was less motivated later to do any other body piercing. I think you just need to decide if your daughter is old enough to take care of her own earings, ears, putting solution on etc. My daughter is still a baby so I will be interested to see when she wants her pierced as well. I think we will decide on an age anywhere between 8-12.

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