When Should We Move Our 6 Month Old from Our Bedroom into Her Own?

Updated on April 03, 2009
J.K. asks from Bellevue, WA
22 answers

Ok so here is the deal, we've had our daughter's bassinet and now crib in our room since she was born (she's never slept in our bed, she's always slept in her own bed). The issue isn't the fact that she's in our room, in fact I enjoying just looking over to see how she's doing especially when she stirs during the night. But I really want to try to avoid a situation where she can't or won't sleep unless she's near us. I guess I'm mainly concerned with her awareness of the sleeping arrangements and think we need to move her out soonr rather than later. If you've had a similar situation with your family, how old was your child when you moved them to their own room? Once you did move them how was it? Was there any seperation issues? What would you do differently or the same? Thank you in advance!!!

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S.W.

answers from Seattle on

I moved both my kids from the co-sleeper into their own rooms and cribs when they were 3 months old. The only separation anxiety was from me. They felt really far away even though they were just across the hall. I would get it done before she becomes too aware she is sleeping with mom and dad. She may take a couple days to adjust, but you will all be happier in the end. GOod luck.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I would do it now, sooner rather then later. I moved my boys into their own room at around 3 months. I would just put them to bed, awake, at the same time every night. If they cried I would go in after 5 minutes and comfort them. I never had to in more then once. I used a monitor to help me sleep better and not worry, but they were just fine with the change.

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K.O.

answers from Portland on

This is really a hard one because it's all so variable. My oldest never slept with us, never slept in our room; and was a horrible sleeper for a long time. My youngest slept in our room for a month, and then he slept in our bed for the rest of his first year. I tried to kick him out around 8 months and he just wasn't having it. At a year I put my foot down. It actually was easier than I thought it would be. My advice is: make a plan and stick to it, be firm. My technique was: consistent bed time routine, if he fussed we would go an briefly comfort him, but we never picked him up or took him out of the crib. That's really what did the trick I think.

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M.B.

answers from Seattle on

J.,

My now 5 year old son has always slept in his room, mainly because where we were living at the time there wasn't enough room in our bedroom for him. We moved our 2 year old daughter to her own room when she outgrew her bassinet at about 4 months old. We didn't have any problems with either of them.

Another reason we moved her at 4 months is that we kept waking each other up as we'd roll around in our respective beds. Once she was in her own room that stopped.

If you want to move her, do it now. At six months old they're still trying to figure out which way is up in the world and it won't be so traumatic as when she's 2.

Happily,
Melissa

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C.A.

answers from Portland on

This is so hard and I agree with the other response - is varied but needs consistency. If your little one is sleeping soundly now is the time to do it. I say this having coslept with my youngest for a month before transitioning him - he slept through the night once I put him in his own bed and then in his own room whereas he was waking up so much at night (we had sleep issues later on but unrelated). The next one refused to cosleep and loved her own bed from day one. This new one only wants to cosleep and refuses his bassinet. Remember you are in control, but each kid has a different set of issues. Transition now, but realize you will have to stick with it. Best of luck!

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S.K.

answers from Seattle on

With our first son, we kept him in our room in his crib for a whole year since we were worried about SIDS. We wanted to be able to hear him breathing at night. After he turned a year old, we just put him in his own room in the same crib and he slept fine. With our second son, this did not work. Even though I always put him in his own crib, he constantly woke up every hour or two to nurse and I couldn't take it any more. I ended up taking him into our bed at about six months old to nurse so that I could get some sleep. He just turned one year old and is still in our bed. He hates his crib and screams whenever I try to put him in it for naps. He always wants to be where everyone else is, so he can't stand being away from the family. I don't know what we will do later, but for now, it is working for our family. The most important advice that I can give is to do whatever you feel most comfortable with and what works best for your family! Good luck to you!

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D.L.

answers from Portland on

Hi J.,

We moved our son into his own room at 3 months, and it didn't seem to phase him too much. We moved his bed in there, of course, so that the place he slept was the same, just not the location. For a few weeks before we moved him, I had him take his naps in there, and we would just hang out in there sometimes, so the room wasn't unfamiliar.

The transition was hardest on me, as I couldn't just look down and see if he was still breathing (I'm a first time mom too;). But I got used to it after a few nights and just listened to the monitor.

Good luck in your transition!
D.

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E.J.

answers from Seattle on

We moved our son at about 4 months and I have to say it was much harder on me than on him. He didn't even seem to notice the change but I was sad that first night - after that however I began to celebrate having our room back and a place that was mine and my husbands alone. You need to do it when you feel ready but I would think that sooner rather than later would be best as they do get more and more conscious of their surroundings and changes after 6 months. We just had to pick a night and do it. Actually I had to tell my husband to make me do it and in the end it was a good thing and now my son loves his crib and his own room! Good luck!

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C.G.

answers from Portland on

I moved my baby girl into her room when she was 2 or 3 months old. (We didn't co-sleep either.) She had no separation issues. I did though! I kept checking on her to make sure she was ok, which she was. Before too long, I adjusted. I can hear her from my room. I even unplugged the sleep monitor, because it really wasn't necessary. It just made me feel better (new mommy jitters).

My advice is to move your darling into her own room ASAP. I doubt she will have separation issues. (I think she will be more likely to have issues the longer you wait.)

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J.N.

answers from Seattle on

We moved our daughter from our room to her own room at 9 months old. It worked great. I really wasn't ready until then. She always slept in her co-sleeper and I put her down for naps in her crib in her room. We finally moved her to her own room because we suspected that our noises at night were waking her up. She transitioned with no problems and slept through the night the first night. At 4 years old, she continues to sleep all night in her own room.

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T.P.

answers from Portland on

I think now is the perfect time to move her to her own room. Our daughter was in a bedside co-sleeper in our bedroom until she was 5m old. At that point she was sleeping 9pm-6am without waking so we decided it was time for her to sleep in her crib in her room. I started by putting her in the crib to play while I folded clothes or straightened up in her bedroom, then I would put her down in the crib for naps. I took a crib sheet and wrapped it around the co-sleeper mattress for a few nights so it would smell like her then put it on the crib before I put her in for naps (babies are VERY sensative to smells for comfort). She didn't even seem to notice the difference and slept great in her crib from day 1. After about a week of crib naps we put her in overnight and she slept 9pm-7am the first night! It turns out my husband getting up for work was waking her at 6am so after we moved her I got an extra hour of sleep...always a good thing :-)

I would also get some type of lovey bear or small blankie for your daughter to get attached too. It has helped a LOT with our daughter to help her self-sooth when she wakes at night and it gives her a familiar "friend" for new and stressfull situations. I just put it in the crib with my daughter at night and naptime and gave it to her while having her bottle. It took about 2 weeks for her to get attached to it and now at 18m old she sleeps with it and it's her "best friend".

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A.H.

answers from Portland on

I co-slept with my son. He moved to his own bed-room easily at 2. I've never had a problem with him trying to sleep with us. This is really subjective to the child. My son thought it was great that he was a big-boy now. Trust your gut feelings. I think it's better to have a 6 month old in the same room as me. Good luck!

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A.T.

answers from Portland on

well, if you think she won't be okay with it, why force it on her? I understand you don't want to create a dependant situation, but your child will let you know when she feels secure enough to move to another room. If you do it sooner than she is ready, & 6 months is still very young, she may develop a sense of insecurity at a young age which is the opposite of what yu are trying to accomplish, Please read Dr. Sears Sleep Book about this, he expalins the psychology of early sleeping separation very well & good luck .

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B.L.

answers from Portland on

Your daughter is exactly the age mine was when we began phasing her out of our room and into her own. I started by nursing her to sleep at night in her room, laying her in her crib for that first long deep sleep. When she woke up in the early morning for that first nursing, I would bring her into bed with me and either keep her there or transfer her to the co-sleeper beside me. I think I had a harder time with it than she did! As she slept longer and woke up less, I gradually began leaving her in her room. We both got more sleep!

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V.B.

answers from Portland on

Our son slept in a co-sleeper next to the bed until he was about 8 months old. Although I loved having him in there, I wanted to move him before he outgrew the co-sleeper.

I think he got used to his crib and room by taking naps in there first. He also starting taking naps with a favorite blanket at around 7 months. We had no problems when we moved him... he took right to it (but he was always a good sleeper anyway). I'd do the same thing again.

Best of luck!

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C.G.

answers from Medford on

we moved our little girl when she was between 4 and 6 months, can't quite remember, and everyone slept much better, we used a monitor so still felt secure enough to her, I wish I had realised earlier that I could hear her faintest crys without a monitor, because it was loud and hard to find one that worked in our house. If she needs you, she will wake you up without a monitor

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M.W.

answers from Seattle on

Congrats to you and your husband for having such a wonderful working/parenting arrangement! My husband and I feel blessed that we get to carpool each day as a family, but you've got it even more worked out!

We were closer to 5 months with our daughter. Had her in a bassinet next to my side of the bed. I couldn't nurse, and we tried co-sleeping--but she was not sleeping deeply, nor was I, so the bassinet was a wonderful way to have her close by. My hesitation was that her nursery was on the main level of our house and our bedroom was upstairs. I didn't want to be "so far away" from her. Once we realized the bassinet was getting too small though, we had to go with it.

We got a nice digital monitor so I could hear her breathing or if she woke up. For you, you're lucky she's in a crib already--one less transition to worry about. They say that it isn't until 9 months that babies truly understand the concept of separation. So, it sounds like you are on track for preparing for this move.

Our little girl was very happy in her own room and her own space to sleep, and my husband and I were finally able to sleep deeply (well, for me it was only mildly) again! Now she's a little over 2 and last summer we moved her room upstairs, near ours finally (so long upstairs office/TV room) and she loves her space. She's actually kind of possessive about it now and loves to sleep with her music on and the door closed.

Best wishes for a smooth transition!

J.S.

answers from Seattle on

J. - I have always had my girls in a separate room, so I'm not speaking from my own experience, but from my sister's. She has had to keep her son in her bedroom because of their housing situation, and it's been a nightmare for her for all of the almost two years since he arrived! He'll be two in May, and he still wakes multiple times during the night and cries. She has to sleep on the couch half the time, which means she has been pretty haggard for many months. Dad can't help, not because he won't - he's a great, helpful dad - but because my nephew only wants to nurse and will have nothing to do with dad!

I'm not trying to be all doom and gloom, but I would say that if you are making this choice for yourself (not because someone convinced you otherwise) then do it right away. Routine is key, so decide what your bedtime routine will be and don't stray from it at all. In my experience it's only about two weeks with a baby that age and they're completely fine in the new situation.
Blessings!

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H.M.

answers from Seattle on

We moved our son when he was 2 1/2 months old, because the bassinet became too small for him and our daugther at 3 months, as soon as she started sleeping throught the night.
They are now 4 and 2 and they sleep in separated room, for 12-13 hours every night.

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J.T.

answers from Portland on

My son moved to his own room at 3 months old. Previously, he was sleeping in a bassinet in our room only. The transition was more difficult on me than him.

Now that he is 2 1/2 years old, I still sleep with the baby monitor next to my bed!

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G.C.

answers from Richland on

I have 5 children and the youngest is 21 months old. All of our children were in bed with us (it was easier to feed them in the night that way). When they started 'making an "H" ' (one of us would get kicked while the other got head-butted), then we would have them sleep in their crib, in our room. Then, when they started "watching us", then we moved them to their own room.

Moving them happened at a different ages with each child. Some got moved to the crib when they were 4 month old, others were 7 months old. Moving them to their own room, some were 6 months old, others were over a year.

Each child has their own personality. Some of my children (mostly my boys) go to sleep and do great at bed time. When my girls were little, they would cry and fuss and try to get out of going to bed.

My oldest was in our room until she was about 2-years old (because of where we were living, would not have been my 1st choice, but all turned out fine) and then each child after that had others to be in a room with. Being in a room by yourself can be scary or lonely at any age. Different people and personalities handle being alone differently.

I say if both you and your husband are fine with her being in your room, and she is content and happy there, what's the rush? I'm not sure that I personally would want to have a child stay sleeping in my room past about 18 months.

Take care!

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J.V.

answers from Portland on

This was when we moved our daughter into her own room in her crib. I think it was a great time to transition. We had some struggles for a few months. The book Good Night, Sleep Tight by Kim West really helped us a lot. She is a clinical social worker who has worked with a lot of families regarding sleep issues. I know people also really love the video monitors for an extra assurance. My noise monitor has always done the trick.

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