When Did Your Son Potty Train?

Updated on January 11, 2008
C.C. asks from Skippack, PA
23 answers

My son Tommy is 2 1/2 and has NO interest in potty training. All his cousins are girls and have been potty trained for quite some time. I hear different things from everyone. I have one friend who told me her son was potty trained a 1 year! And another friend whos son is 9 and still has trouble remembering to go. I know all kids are different but I thought it would be good to have some consensus.
Thanks!
C.

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So What Happened?

Thanks so much for all the great advice. I had gotten Tommy a potty chair and a seat that goes on the toilet a couple months ago. And he has to packages of Diego underwear and spiderman underwear. I guess now I will just wait until he seems ready for it! I'll keep everyone updated! Thanks again!

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A.R.

answers from Philadelphia on

I tried at 2 1/2, 2 and 9 months, and the day of his 3rd Birthday, I just took the diaper off and didn't look back. No accidents. Nothing, he was fine. I could have worked on it sooner, but would have to really work on it, but I didn't. I had daughter when he was 2 and 9 months, so that is why I got sidetracked. Everyone child is different. Don't worry!

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E.A.

answers from Allentown on

HI
My son is 3 and a half and we just got him to start wearing regular big boy underpants about 3 weeks ago. There are still occasional accidents, but up until recently he would not do #2 on the potty, only in his pull ups. It definately takes more time with boys than girls from what I understand. Hang in there, I know it gets frustrating at times but he'll get it soon.

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L.T.

answers from Pittsburgh on

MOST of the boys I know didn't get really interested in potty training until closer to 3 years. And they didn't get really good at it until 3 1/2 or 4. My own son is still potty training at 3 1/2. We had started with him at age 2 then had to stop at age 2 1/2 because of medical treatments. As dissapointed as I was to halt our progress he wasn't showing much interest so I don't think we are far behind where we would have been anyways.

You are right that each child is different. I wouldn't be too concerned about it at this point. If you haven't already tried this, put him on the potty at designated times each day - maybe first thing in the morning, after each meal, before bed. Remember to give praise for trying as well as actually producng something. A reward system works well with my son - stickers, treats, small toys. I also talk to my son about what it means to be a big boy - using the tv remote, playing on the computer AND going potty. We've used pull ups and called them underwear but he has pretty much figured out that they are diapers, so they didn't really work for us.

I know it is frustrating. Hang in there. :)

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N.R.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son turned 4 in July and as of October was he TOTALLY trained...including night time

Granted he's special needs BUT I know PLENTY of kids boys and girls who will do it when THEY want to do it. It's a control issue and you have NO control...they do.

I used a potty chart with stickers and he LOVED that. I started with him sitting on big potty with lid DOWN (yes I said lid down) just to get him use to going in and sitting. Then I worked on sitting lid up and pants up (yes I said pants up)

I did this over a week each *step and we'd use a egg timer.
He got a sticker for sitting and when I went commando (yes NO PULL UPS---they are too much like a diaper, and yes I had blankets EVERYWHERE to help with the *mess) He'd get an X on his chart for accidents and a rewarded for voideing.

Needless to say I trained my autistic child in a short 3 weeks. He just got it.

Time is on your side, don't compare

B.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I have three girls and I will be honest with you. None of my girls trained until they were about 3 yrs old. I have to say what when they decided to wear "panties" it was very easy and we never had an "accident" or a wet bed. We did use pull-ups at night at first, but then when ever they asked if they could wear panties to bed we said yes. At first I was worried because they trained so "late", but my doctor assured me that as long as they were trained by the time they were ready to go to school they would be fine. Take a deep breath, back off the topic and see what your son does. He may surprise you. If he doesn't ask him again in a couple of months if he is ready to be a big boy and go potty. You might also want to consider that he may not like using a potty chair and may want to use the toliet. Our girls hated the potty chair and were great with a little seat that I bought that fit onto the regualr toliet seat. They still sell them in many different patterns at walmart, taget and kmart. Good luck!!

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D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My five year old was trainedin a month just after his third birthday. My two year old (nov b-day) is showing interest but I'm not really pushing it yet because he still fights it sometimes. I don't want to offend anyone who has done this, but I hate to tell you that the women who said her son was trained at a year, well she was the one who was trained IMHO. She learned the signs that her son showed and got him to the potty in time. That is not really potty trained till the child is doing it completely on their own and able to pull thier clothes on and off on their own, so don't let that story upset you. I personally don't know too many mom's who are willing to put that much time into it just to get their child out of diapers that early. lol. Introduce him to the potty seat and until he is around three, I wouldn't push it. Just every few weeks encourage him to try again. Good luck and don't worry. It sounds like he is right on target.

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E.T.

answers from Philadelphia on

Both of my boys were 3 years and 3 months. The older one got it right away, but wore a diaper to bed for another year. My second son took about a month before the accidents stopped (not that he had many), but from day one he was fine during the night. Now my daughter on the other hand, had no interest. At age 4 1/2 I had had enough. She is 5 now, starts kindergarten in September and is potty trained during the day. She stills wear the pull-up at night. For a while it would be wet 2 times per week. Now were back to being wet just about every night. Each child is different. Just don't push. Make sure when you do start that you have not made any plans to go places and just be home. I still keep a potty in my car. With my boys I use to drag it with me to the park all the time. That made us a bit more mobile.

Also with my first, we would often go out with some of his friends to the mall or elsewhere. Whenever they would say they needed to go potty, he would ask if he could try.

Good luck! He'll let you know.

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P.P.

answers from Erie on

My son just turned 2-1/2. He's good with peeing if we ask him if he has to go and take him in to the bathroom with us. He will not tell us he has to go yet and would rather go in his diaper. He has no interest in pooping in the potty at all. In fact he loves to sit in it. "It feels good" he says when I ask! BOYS!!!!!!@#$%!
Patience is the key to this!

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J.M.

answers from Allentown on

my son was trained at 25 months & 27 months @ night.
everyone child is different. start introducing the idea to him, let him experience the potty seat, read potty stories, let him pick out big boy underwear, etc.
some use rewards, always use praise!!

good luck!

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T.

answers from Allentown on

I feel your plan is the best way to go. Girls learn faster. I have heard that boys who are rushed into potty training too soon take a lot longer to learn. Some end up like the 9 year old you talked about. Go with the "flow" :) and before long he will be going potty like he has done it his whole life. My son started at 3 years but didn't get it 100% (never having to ask him if he needs to go, flushing the toilet and wash his hands all by him self) until 5 years old.

Good Luck!

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J.G.

answers from Philadelphia on

Girls tend to start potty training earlier than boys. My daughter is 21 mos and is showing signs of getting ready to be potty trained. I only say that to back up the girls before boys thing...not to add salt to the wound. I think the norm for boys to start is 3. I wouldn't be concerned about it yet. All kids are different and do things in their own time. If you are really concerned about it ask your pediatrician. Good luck!

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J.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter picked the day she was going to train and from there on it was clear sailing. My son will be 3 in April and has no interest. If you try and push it seems to take longer. Just let him show you when he is ready and it will go much better. Hang in there.

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A.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I waited until both of my boys turned 3 and put them right into underpants (or naked). I took about 10 days each time. You have to be strong, consistent and reward the heck out of them for going! Don't go backwards and don't use pull-ups.

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F.H.

answers from Sharon on

My sons is 3 1/2 and hes not quite ready just yet. My other son was eaxclty 3 1/2 when he potty trained and I hardly had to anything cos he was so ready. My other one finally potty trained at 4 and still has troubles.
Key indicators of readiness for me have been, being able to get pants up and down easily.
Indicating that they need to poop.
Having a good vocabulary and being able to follow instructions well.
Staying dry in their diaper for a couple of hours.
I just put a pull up on around three years when I see these readiness signs and we have a go. If it is a miserable failure then I wait for 3-6 months before I try again. Excited because my son is getting more ready now but I have discovered he has no idea yet when he needs to pee but can do the bowel movemnts. Bought the huggies cool alert pull ups instead of the diappearing picture and he actually told me he just peed in them. i think it may work for me and then I'll only have one in diapers!
Beleive me if you try potty training now you'll be at it for months. If you wait till hes ready you'll only have to do it for 2 weeks at the most! Its easier.

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H.B.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I believe all kids are different and potty train at all ages when ready. my son is a may baby so the summer he turned 2 we had all summer to let him train. know i will say i bought a elmo potty chair and around 18 months started showing him it and i put a jar of suckers/sticker ect.. beside it and when he went he got a prize my son loved the idea. here is also an idea my husband put fruit loops in toliet and shot at them to dunk them and as soon as my son caught on he was running to pee lol it was just a fun thing my gram told us about with my uncles.

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J.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

My son is 2 1/2 also and we've been in big boy pants for about 2 weeks. Best advice which will be bit weird is spend the time your home with him running around with no pants or diaper on his bottom half. We did that for about a month and then slowly started to wear underwear, then pants. It stinks having to clean up messes but if your little guy catches on quickly, you won't have too many.

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S.W.

answers from Harrisburg on

my son was completely trained 2months after his 3rd birhtday ( although he still uses a pull up at night)

the thing that made him the most "interested" was getting my husband involved and allowing him to train standing up - once i let him do that he literally trained in less than a week. (before that i was trying to do it sitting down) - but letting him see my husband go potty and going into the public bathrooms with him that type thing. let him pick out some "big boy pants" -

also what i did was i set a goal for myslef (for me it was as soon as preschool was done so i could be with him all day everyday) and until then i let him wear BBP (big boy pants) when and how he wanted too - and i created a kid friendly calendar (you can use links like for santa coming; or a calendar that you mark off days) and told him that on that given day he was goign to be a big boy - and made abig deal out of it - and he helped me to mark off the days - adn when it got closer we got new BBP and some "poopy wipes" (flushable wipes) and then i went at it hard core on that day....

if you want more help/ideas - email me: ____@____.com

S. w

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L.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Both my boys were trained right around 2 to 2-1/2 years old. Oldest was 25 months when he was trained. The younger one was just 2-1/2. My oldest was even dry through the night at 25 months. He has always been headstrong, and actually stood on his bed one day at bedtime and told me "NO! I'M NOT A BABY!" He was very easy, but believe me, he made up for that by being a real tornado of energy the rest of the time.

My boys were "early" trainers by today's standards, but at the time, my mom and grandmother were all over me for waiting so late. Go figure. My guys are now 20 and 18 years old. Of course, we had disposable diapers in those days, but I only used them when we went out. I did that mostly because we were absolutely dead poor in those days. I couldn't afford disposables. All of my older female relatives had given me cloth diapers as gifts, so that's what I had to work with. Being in cloth absolutely makes a huge difference. The kids feel wet and messy from the start, and learn early not to like that feeling. Kids actually do have the capability of controlling bowel and bladder pretty well long before they are 3 and 4. We know that because for generations before disposable diapers, human beings were trained, and they were trained as very young toddlers back in the days before the convenience of indoor plumbing.

It's really up to what you want to do. I found it much easier to train a child younger. I was at home with my kids and could provide 24/7 consistent training while we were going through the process. At the most, it took me a week to train each of my boys. I found my kids to be very interested in imitating mommy and daddy in all things when they were 2. By 3 and 4, they were more interested in being their own persons ... that is, more likely to say NO to me and be interested in other things.

And then the cloth diapers was a huge incentive for me, as well. I did not have a diaper service, so all of that work was on me. It wasn't difficult, but it was tedious, and more work than using disposables. I wanted the diaper time to end, as well.

So, it's really up to how you want to do it. I think that if your bathroom activities are part of your child's daily life, i.e., he goes into the bathroom with mom and/or dad often, this will encourage him to want to imitate you. That's a painless way to at least have him gain some knowledge about toileting. It doesn't take any time out of the day that you aren't already using. When you do start training, get right in there and always be consistent. I don't believe that kids are "ready" later. But I don't think it's a big evil thing if a parent waits to potty train a child, either. But it is very different teaching a 2 year old versus teaching a 4 year old. Whenever you do it, you'll have to tailor the technique to the child's developmental level. For me, 2 was easy. For others, 4 is easy.

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M.I.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son wasn't truly trained until about a year ago, when he was just past 3 y.o.; night time training has taken longer.

I know that boys take a little longer than girls, so don't feel pressured because the little girls in your family are at this point and he is not. Keep introducing it, and eventually he will get the hang of it.

I know my daycare helped a lot with the potty training, but it still took a little while at home for it all to sink in. At daycare, they would troup all of the boys (8 of them!) into the bathromm every 30 minutes or so and make them try and go. Eventually they lengthed the time until they were able to go on their own. I think that took about 4 months or so, but it worked!

Good luck!

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T.M.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Dont worry. my little man turned 3 in november and was still in pull ups. we had been using the potty in the morning right after he got up and at night before bed, btu other than that showed no interest at all. and those two times were even us taking him. about the middle of november, when we were in the car he told me he had to pee and has been going ever since. and for one week now had been using the potty all the time and in big boy underpants.
he really will do it on his own time. just keep reminding him.

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A.L.

answers from York on

Hi,
I have two boys and I asked a lot of moms the same question. The most consistent answer was around 3 yrs old. Mine were both 3 1/2 and when they decided to potty train it didn't take long at all. My suggestion to introduce the concept and then let them take the lead. They will let you know and they might try it and then stop (one of mine did that). It is a very frustrating part of raising boys I think. I did everything wrong and they still got potty trained before they were 4...so it will happen no matter what...lol! Good luck and don't worry about it too much. Try not to compare your child with others, it only makes you worry about things that you shouldn't. I think boys especially grow at different rates. There will always be someone's kid that seems smarter or more advanced or something. God made your child exactly the way he should be! Wonderfully yours! Good luck.

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A.S.

answers from New York on

My son was 2 1/2 BUT - you never compare your child with someone else!!!!! My neighbor's children were potty trained at 12mths
but all of them wet the bed until they were 4-5 years old!!!
Change his diapers and stop comparing - children are very independent when they are toddlers and this is one of the things they can control!!!! I tried my son at 2 and he wanted nothing to do with it - at 2 1/2 he was ready and it worked in 2 weeks!!!Please be patient - boys average 3 - 4 years potty trained!!!
Lots of luck!!!

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J.F.

answers from New York on

I don't think you will find a consensus on this topic.
Everybody is different. Yes, I was potty trained as soon as I could sit and I did make an attempt to do the same with my second child, it completely did not work, and I realized that it could not work because I was raised on cloth diapers. I know from the day I was born what it means to pee and when I peed - I was wet! Not that I remember it of course. Our children raised on disposable diapers have no association of cause and effect whatsoever. How could they? Anyway - my daughter was potty trained when she was 2 years and 2 months. Or was she? She still sleeps in pull up because she needs it and she will be 4 in March.
My son will be 2 in February and I am planning on switching him to feel wet pull ups for a long tim before I even make an attempt in potty training so that he develops some sense of what happens after he pees. Otherwise you have to get them to be cooperative or it will be a frustrating experience (it will be anyway, but hopefully a bit less). Don't worry, don't feel that you have to do it the way somebody else did, just gather various ideas and do what works best for you. Also remember that boys get to be potty trained on average later than girls.
Good luck.

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