What Would You Do If Your Cat........????

Once I had kids, my cat turned mean on everyone. I ended up giving it to a family member who loves the cat dearly. My kids know that used to be our cat, but aunt wanted her so we shared and gave it to her. You could just tell your kids someone else really wants the cat and it's nice to share.

1 mom found this helpful

Unfortunately, once your kitty has started having behavior problems, there doesn't seem to be a way to stop it. It sounds like he has territorial issues--I've lived with that situation. If he was just peeing on the floor, I'd say it was worth keeping him for as long as you were willing to clean the pee off the floor. However, you say that he's started to be mean to your daughters. I really hate to say it, but that sounds like a reason to give him up for adoption. :(

I had the same thing happen to me...the cat started spraying...I tried everything... I have a friend that is a vet, so she gave me some ideas, and after a certain point, she says it isn't going to stop. My children were 4 1/2, and 2 1/2, so we put him in the car carrier, and went for a ride to mc donalds, and grandma's house. As far as they know, I had to run back out to the store, and I opened the carrier to give the cat a french fry, and he jumped out the window and ran away. We had to put him down. I had wanted to be more honest with them, and use it as a life lesson, that sometimes people and animals get old/sick and die, but I had just gotten out of the hospital from having complications from a surgery, and didn't want them to think I was going to die. Good luck to you, I can't tell you how hard it was to do, but there comes a point where you have to look out for your children's welfare. the pee and poop does not make for a sanitary environment, and it just gets old cleaning it everyday. There are lots of kittens out there that need good homes.....

How old is this cat dear? It sounds like a lot of work for you. I know pets are precious and can be just like part of the family so the owner does'nt mind cleaning up after them but when they start being mean there is a reason and that does not make that pet pleasurable to have. I would feel like it is not worth having a pet that may do something to hurt the children. That cat may be sick or getting senile dear.

D., sorry to tell you this, but it has been my experience that once they start spraying, even if you neuter, they will not stop. Obviously he is very teritorial. While you don't want to send the message that animals are expendable, you also cannot have an animal that does those things in your house either. It's not healthy. We just gave a cat away because when mad, she would pee in a corner of the bathroom. It could be either one of the kids made her mad, we let our dogs in the house, anything. The last straw was when she pooped on our loveseat because we went up north for the weekend and took the dogs. We didn't take her because she doesn't travel well at all!!! Just my personal opinion. L. S.

I agree with MC, you should take him to the vet. But, if the cat is healthy and still doing it, I would give him up.. Cat pee is the worst.

We had a cat that started refusing to use his litter box. Our vet told us that is usually a sign of a bladder infection or blockage. Within just a matter of a couple of days on the medication, we lost him. You may want to get him checked out.

It's a difficult situation - we have a cat named Max, who came into our home after my beloved Springer Spaniel was put to sleep due to kidney failure.

He's a great, affectionate animal, however he also had started sparying and pooping outside his litterbox, it turns out there were issues like for instance he wasn't fixed.

When we did get him neutered, the problem didn't stop there - the carpet was already soiled, he could still smell the odor so it didn't matter.

Other animals he could smell, see or found to be a threat also caused him to mark his terrority. We finally called a professional carpet cleaning agency and they steamed the entire section where Max had been going.

Since then we've changed his litter; went to vet recommended, special cat food and this - so far seems in combination is working.

Max no longer has the urge to do either outside his box, we've even kept the litter to a certain level, he seems to find it easier to go without having to scrunch his body down.

Sometimes it takes awhile before you find a method (or methodes) that work.

As far as his being mean to the girls - that is a strange behavior in itself. I would take him to a vet and have your cat checked out.

Btw, no matter how much you scrub and clean - the odor of cat urine will NOT simply vanish; you should tear up carpeting and use a special oil based solvent -- I can't, at the moment remember the name, but any vet could tell you -- or any place like Pet Supply Plus etc.

I would explain to your kids that while you love your cat very much you have to find him a new home because you don't want to risk the cat hurting them.

D., I had a similar problem with my cat - before I had kids. Knowing it would be difficult with two little ones and a cat with an attitude I had to make a very difficult choice...I found her a new home where she would get the attention she needed. I know now it is probably not you first option (it wasn't mine either) but I want you to know if it gets to that, it is possible. I love(d) my cat very much and didn't want to do what everyone was not saying...she was older - noone thought I would be able to find a home for her. I placed an Absolutely Free ad in the Spinal Column and found a loving family to adopt her. I hope it doesn't come to having to give her up but if it does there are options.

D.,

TAKE HIM TO THE VET. I've had a few male cats (1at a time) and all of them had problems with crystals in their urethra. Males are notorious for this and it can be managed through diet but he needs to be checked at the vet first and probably needs antibiotics.

Hi D.,

I would first take him to the Vet to ensure there is nothing wrong. The peeing everywhere certainly could be a response to the cat upstairs... marking his territory and such. But the pooping... that is odd behavior and I think it warrants a trip to the vet. You could also talk to the vet about their suggestions for stopping the peeing and aggression. The aggression could be due to an ailment.

If kitty ends up being in good health and the behavior continues then yes... kitty needs a new home. I agree with the suggestion of openly talking to your girls about the fact that kitty is no longer happy living at home ...but be careful with this.. you don't want to instill the idea that when you are unhappy with your home situation you can just leave. To avoid this, I would talk to them and say something like 'kitty can't talk to us and let us know WHY he is unhappy here. We just know he is unhappy, so we have to find him a new home. If one of us were to be unhappy we could sit down as a family and discuss the situation and find a way to solve the problem. But, because kitty can't talk, all we can do is try to find him a home where he will be happy.'

We have been living in Germany for 2 years and our cat has been living with my mother. We now have an 8mos old daughter. When we go home, for good, this summer I may have to make the same choice you are. Thankfully I think my mother will keep our cat if there is a problem.

Good luck!
R.

i understan to the fullest i had a cat and when i move in with me husband the cat peed on eveything of his he was not happy about the move i see that but at the same time we could not have that kind of behavior the cat ended up passing waay but i think you should get rid of the cat he will always do this behavior no matter what you try i know it will be hard so good luck

Hi D.! When this happened to us, it broke my heart to have to give her up, but it was the only thing to do. The Humane Shelter said they could never place her again due to her "problem" so offered to euthanize her. When the carpet was removed, the underlayment was soaked with urine! So all your cleaning is in vain, and the smell will always be there. We had to seal the underlayment with Kilz befor the new pad and carpet could be installed. Your best approach to your daughters might be to ask them if they think it's fair to let the cat treat their home like his personal toilet. We can love our pets, but there is a limit to what we should put up with from them!

get rid of it, tell them it is going to a good home where he will have lots of room to run.

Your cat is acting like a cat. Now that he's become territorial he will remain territorial. Even if he's neutered at this point.

Having a war with a cat over scent marking (both the spraying and missing the catbox) is a bit of a waste of time. There are 2 things I know about cats spraying: they will only do it to 'renew' the scent (unless the other cat gets in and marks over it) so if you let it fade instead of trying to get rid of it, your cat will still smell it (you won't) and not need to repeat it, and; you can very strongly encourage the cat to ONLY mark outside... but you can't stop a cat from being a cat if he's only ever inside.

It is the other cat's presence that has triggered this, for good cat social reasons. Since you can't make the other cat go away, you may need to make your cat go away. This is inappropriate indoor behaviour, and if he's not going to get to go outside to do his business, he will continue to be a problem in the house.

You may choose to do otherwise, but I would neuter him and let him out -- but I personally think cats should get to go outside anyhow. I disagree with the statistical anaylsis that animal shelters advertise about the life-shortening aspects of outdoor cats, considering that they don't take the feral, dumped and stray cats out of the numbers to demonstrate what age loved, cared for and home-based cats live to. All of my cats have been outdoor cats, and we have only had one die before she was 16, and that was because of a car engine. (warm place to sleep, bad idea when the engine is turned back on)

I know that the only other way to stop him from spraying in your house is to make sure he is never in your house again.

my cat (a female, but still a cat with an attitude) usually responds to stress by urinating all over the place and becoming irritable. This could be stress from a lifestyle change or from illness.

I would have him looked at by a vet, perhaps there is some medical problem you need to address. If no illness, you might want to consider giving him a nutritional supplement made for cats. They need greens. Get him some cat grass if you don't want to spend money on good cat vitamins. I don't know about you but if I don't take my vitamins, I'm pretty cranky! Or it could just be an attitude adjustment that needs to happen. Nature's Miracle helps get the stinky pee out and Feliway is a good way to retrain the cat in areas that he repeatedly marks (it is a feline facial pheremone, they won't pee in places where they think they've rubbed their face - that's a warm, fuzzy affectionate scent for them.) You also might want to try putting the Feliway on your kids clothes and see how the cat responds to that.

After trying all of the above suggestions if you don't see any change or improvement, it might be time to find him a new home. I love my cats and I've gone through a lot to keep them in our family. We've been pretty successful, and I hope you are too!

Urinating or spraying is one of the most common side effects in a bladder or urinairy tract infection which can be very serious also may be causing his reactions to your children. This would also explain his bowl movements outside of the litter box... assuming the box is kept clean. Animals associate there pain in these matters with the litter box so they will find a comfortable area, often times clothes or something that smells like you and go there instead because it makes them feel close to you in turn giving them a sense of security. Its a simple test to have run at the vet and also inexpensive. It usually runs around 30 dollars to have the test run and get a course of antibiotics. contact your local vet for specifics and good luck I hope everything works out for you, losing an animal is rough.
E., mom of 2 kids and 3 cats

D.,

Cats that start spraying don't stop. Cat feces and urine are not good for kids to be around. Cleaning does not get it all out of carpeting especially and you can't bleach all clothes (if anything is left on the floor and he gets to it).

I understand your dilemma with your girls. I would tell them that he was old or cranky (cause i'm sure they already know that) or something and wasn't good with a busy family like yours, so you thought he'd be really happy living with someone alone where it was quiet. That you blessed someone else's life with him and he's happy.

I agree with everyone else but I'll offer one suggestion... What do you clean your litter box with? If it is a harsh cleaner the cat will not want to go in it. I found a site that helped us and hope it helps you too.

http://cats.about.com/cs/litterbox/a/litterboxhelp.htm

Good Luck and God Bless
K.
P.S. Urine Gone cleaner really helped to lessen the smell

I would say that you love the car but he needs to go to a home where they can take special care of him. He seems to be a lot of trouble. Then I wouldn't get another cat until the kids are older so they can help take care of it.

You may want to have the vet check him for a unineary track infection. This can sometimes cause a cat to 'go' all over. Otherwise, you could put him in a crate or in the bathroom when you are not home to watch him. Otherwise, maybe think of making him an outside cat, and just let him in sometimes (this depends on how your apartment is set up) But if none of these will work, dont feel bad to get rid of him, your kids health, (not to mention your security deposit) is more important than a pet, even if he is well loved.

I would start with getting some of that UrineGone spray. It neutralizes odors. And look, I've had my one cat for years and just the other night I let him in, and a few minutes later he comes into my room, lifted his tail, and squirted on the end of my dresser. I wanted to shoot him. I was so mad! I couldn't get to him in time (physical limitations) but I was p.o'd big time.

Some cats just aren't good with kids or people in general. Let the cat alone, and let him decide who he wants to schmooze with. I'm just one of those types that has no tolerance when a human forces him/herself on a cat. My hubby picks our other one up whether she likes it or not. I just shake my head.

If of course it gets out of hand your options are to consult with an animal behaviorist (very hard to find) or find another home for the cat. Maybe he just wants another cat around.
Good luck. Not an easy decision.

I would get rid of it. I am a cat lover for sure. I have had experience with both boy and girl cats, both fixed by 6 months. Which I believe is the earliest you can do it. Both inside cats. Once they start it, in my experience never stop. Even though you might not be able to smell it they will smell it and keep going back to that spot. Both cats I took to vets. Each one said it was a behavioural problem and might be fix able thru medications. I did that with my first problem cat which was the male. It didn't help. Not sure what made him start. Several years later when I started having problems with my girl cat, it was after the birth of my second child. That is when it started. Only hitting the bathroom rug, which I thru in the washer, but kept peeing on it. I found her a home and the lady said she had no problems. I hope this helps. T.

Don't give up on the cat just yet. I want to second, or third, the recommendation to take the cat to the vet to be checked for infections. We had a cat who started spraying and took him in. The vet gave him some anti anxiety meds and he was ok after that.

From one animal lover to another I can really appreciate what you are trying to teach your children. However, it sounds like this animal is just not the right fit for your family and needs. Correct me if I'm wrong but my understanding is that once cats start spraying they will continue to repeat the behavior even after being neutered. I would try to find another home for your cat and start over with a cat who has been neutered before puberty or start with a kitten and neuter him yourself. Sometimes avoiding this surgery ends up being the un-kind thing in the long run when it makes a pet undesirable to live with. In the mean time, find a cleaner that has enzymes that specifically treat pet odor/urine. I've found So-U-Mel made by Melaleuca, Inc. to be superior to anything else I've tried... and it gets out ALL the messes little ones make at this age. You can find it at www.melaleuca.com It is purchased in a concentrate and worth every of the direct sell price... but if you want a discount, you can become a member and purchase it 30-40% off. If you need more help than e-mail me at ____@____.com Good luck with your hard decisions! Blessings, Lori ~

Do you have a floor rug in front of the toilet? Our cat was doing that too. Also, try washing the floor in front of the box in bleach water and that should help too. Good luck! Ours poops in front of the box too, but I can't use bleach cause I'm allergic to it.

I know that this is hard. I had to deal with the same issue. I had to give mine up for adoption. I spent about 9 months trying to find a different way. I couldnt handle it when it came to sanitation for my children. Even when we cant smell the pee anymore the cats can. It also is still in the floor or floor boards depending on how many times they pee in that area. You have to look at what is going to happen if your landlords find out it is peeing. You might want to think about wither moving or adoption. It also depends on how long it has been since the other cat moved in. Some of it may just take time. Talk with your vet to see if there is something you can spray around the house to help with the smell of another cat being around. Hope this helps
Christine

Sounds as if it is time to find a good home for the cat, one without children. You are dealing with health and safety issues, not to mention the fact that the cat apparently isn't too fond of children. You are in a smaller home which probably contributes to the problems. Animals are not indispensable, but it may be that this is not a good match for your family situation at this time. Ask your veterinarian for ideas.

I have had my cat for 11 years and when i moved out of my parents he stayed there until they got another cat, he started spraying everywhere, so they called me to take him and i did and he hasnt sprayed ever since but he just cant be around other cats! I have 2 dogs and 2 kids and hes fine with them just not other cats! How long has he been doing this? Because it could also be a jealousy thing with one of your girls! I would definetly ask your vet about him and get there opinion. If nothing works with him id find him a nice home without any other animals or kids and if the girls have a rough time with it, get them a kitten, that hopefully will be nicer! But you cant let him keep destroying your house and being mean with your kids either! Also, my cat started peeing everywhere but there was blood in it, so i took him to the vet last summer and he was on 2 differnt antibiotics for 5 weeks and i also changed his food to Purina Special care Urinary tract formula, i think thats what its called or close to it and that did it right there he hasnt had an infection back since and its very common with older male cats! So def. take him to the vet! Good luck! But thats what i would do!

The way I see it is that your cat is a part of the family. I've never had a cat, so I have no idea about training cats, but I have had dogs all of my life. Our current dog, Linus, chewed our leather couch (and got the fluff out...big mess, ruined couch) when he was a puppy. My husband said he wanted to take him to the 'glue factory', which my 2 year old at the time interpreted as the "glue family." Anyhow, with a little love and attention, he is one very happy member of the family. I get it...it must be very frustrating to you right now...but he is a part of the family in my opinion.

P.S. Cudos to you for getting him neutered.

First, I would call the vet to find out is kitty has some kind of infection or ailment? Check with the vet and see what the vet suggests. I'm a devoted cat lover and always will be. Unfortunately, I had to give up my cat when my allergies became unbearable. I have an older dog right now who is having potty problems, so I know how you feel. One day at a time. It's hard to make this tough decision. If kitty is in good health, I think you need to find kitty a new home especially if he is mean to your girls. This cat is obviously not a happy pet and his actions are talking for him. I would explain to the kids that kitty needs to move out because he's not happy living here. Have a heart to heart with them and be truthful mentioning that sometimes pets need to move because it is for the best. I think your girls will understand since the cat is mean to them. I would make finding a new home a family effort with your girls by showing compassion and care in selecting a new place for kitty. Be selective where you place kitty. Finding a cat a home can be a challenge. Check with rescue groups. Petfinder.com is a good place to start--they offer all kinds of leads. You can also check with Petco and Petsmart because they can be helpful regarding placement. Also, the vet may have some ideas. I was very careful about where my kitty would be placed. I avoided the animal shelter because my kitty was older and I feared she may be euthanized, so I feverishly called everyone I knew and asked if they wanted her. When I exhausted all those people, I checked with rescue groups and pet stores. At the time, I wasn't having much luck, so I placed an ad at a grocery store and luckily found an older couple who took her.

Good luck and let us know what happens.

MC