You've gotten some amazing advice already, but let me tell you as a Mommy who was in one of those relationships that you have to act now and quickly.
My son Dad and I have known each for 19 years, and were a couple as adults in a disfunctional relationship for four years before I got preggers with our son. The only thing I didn't do was fight for the relationship when it still had life in it, and by the time I acted he was already checked out and ready to move on. I let it go, I brushed it off and created excuses for why it was 'my fault' that things were always so awful. It was when I had my son that my eyes opened to what was truly going on, we had problems with communication and trust and neither one of us was brave enough to ask for help.
I agree, get counseling...ask him if he will go with and if not, then go on your own. Sit down with him and tell him that your feeling are important and that you'd like to start having weekly sit downs to talk about your life together. Come up with a game plan together, either in therapy or out of it, on how you will care for your little girl together...you are a team, not two individuals who happen to share a child.
He needs to realize that you are working hard, at what you have in front of you. It's tough being a Mommy and its even harder when you live with someone else and have to work through those obstacles as well. I know your situation from previous posts, and I think I agree that you two need to find a place of your own...even a one bedroom for now to get away from the tension and anxiety that is probably contributing to your depression. I know being depressed is tough, and right now I love my therapist. She has helped me learn about me and how I function in relationship and to be a better Mommy. But, also how to work with my son's Dad to be better parents...it's been great.
I think the thing is, your marriage still has life in it, but if your struggles continue to go unaddressed then it will suffer worse than it is now. For your little one, I'd say give it a shot and work on getting your marriage to a place where you and your hubby can talk to each other about everything and work together.