What to Do About Car Seat Safety?

Definitely say something. If someone (especially my daycare provider) were to offer me some advice as to how to keep my baby safer, I would welcome it. It seems like carseat safety is common sense, but a lot of people are severely lacking in the common sense department. So, approach it immediately, gently and seriously- you could save a little life.

Yes! Please do tell the parents. Use a matter of fact tone with them though. Perhaps they are tired, in a hurry, and such - - not valid exuses but I know how tired I was and sometimes still am with my kids with waking up in the night. I myself would want someone to tell me if I was doing it wrong. I have my husband install the car seats because I am afraid to do it wrong. There are so many straps and buttons to push on them these days. The care seats come in different styles and sizes and vehicles are different too. The instructions for use is a long booklet and has lots of warnings like "don't put it on fire" (exageration there). I would love it if they were standardized and all worked the same way. It's confusing for me and I am sure that it would be confusing for others. The other reason why I say yes, tell them, is because it would ease your mind and my mind too.

If you are going to approach the parents, and it sounds like you definitely should, the try putting it this way so hopefully you won't offend.

"You know, I just attended a car seat safety class and I had no idea how little I really knew! Did you know that unless the straps are tight and the chest strap is at the chest, the belts are completely ineffective?"

Now, obviously you don't have to say exactly that, but something along the lines of check out this new info I found out would probably come across better than if you lectured or sounded preachy.

Personally I wouldn't be offended because I would rather be corrected than put my child in danger.

And just so you know, there really are some people out there that are that ignorant that they wouldn't know that not buckling the seat into the car won't work.

I am a licensed in home daycare and as part of my application process I make the parents sign a form about car seats and the rules about them and i also give them many fliers about car seats if you give me you address i can send them to you and you could make copies to hand out. They are called policy on parents transporting their children i got it from a former daycare person and have lots of copies. It has come in handy when a parent or grandparent comes to pick up the child i can say the parents signed this and you do not have the requirements for picking up the child i have helped all the parents and grandparents properly install their car seats thay also ask when they need them adjusted how and if i would be willing to help. I just had a grandparent pick up the other day and said she needed me to install it first as she had just bought a new one and was having problems most people are great about it I have only had 1 problem since i started the papre work and that was with a dad who didn't normaly pick up he said he didn't want to be the bad guy and i said those were the rules and he even called the mom and she told him the same thing (the worst part was that he had the car seat in the car (i am the one who put it in a couple months before) and was putting her in the front (3 1/2 years old).
I will be motre than glad to send you the papers in the mail.

I so understand what you are talking about. We do foster care so we had to take the classes too. It's just unreal how many parents don't do it right. My foster boys' Mom was going to put an infant in a forward facing car seat for a 6 hour trip and when I told her she couldn't take him without the right seat she told me she'd buy a new one when she got there! Then I followed her to Walmart to buy the new seat and she asked if I could put it in for her because she could "never figure those things out". And then asked me to strap him in too because she didn't know how to do his straps either. This child has a 3 year old brother that she'd been transporting all his life like this! But even parents with the best of intentions do it wrong.
I would just get the brochures and give them to every parent and mention that you'd noticed many seats that were put in wrong and you want to make sure your "babies" are safe. The ones who give a darn will ask for help and hopefully the others will at least read it.
I think the big thing people don't realize is that ALL seats are different and you have to read the manual of each of them.
Another thing that is dangerous is when people only have one seat for 2 vehicles. Moving them back and forth makes it really hard to take the time to get them in right. Even if you have to get the cheaper seats, get two of them if you need to.
You might even want to buy a video about it and loan it out to them.
Another great idea, if you can afford it is to offer a free week of childcare to any parent who takes the class. It's worth it to avoid the stress of knowing the kids aren't safe.
J.

Yes people are really that ignorant. I work in a womens homeless shelter and it is astonishing to me as to how kids can be neglected in so many ways, not just the car seat issues. I know this one mom who did not want her infant to be uncomfortable in the care seat so she put a blanket over the straps and just set her baby on top of that and then put the baby in the front seat facing forward. How ignorant is that. Or should I say selfish. Or I dont know what I should call it. I was horrified when I saw this. I see alot of women just throwing there babies in the seat without straps. It really is sad. I love my job but some of the things I see go on I could live without. I think it is totally your call. In this womens case it was child neglect and endangerment but alot of cases in everyday life are not so drastic. I think just go with your gut and do what you feel you need to. Good Luck!

Maybe one way to start would be to include it in your orientation to your daycare. You could cite the statistics about how many carseats are installed/used improperly and say that you are really concerned about the safety of the kidlets in your care. Also you could provide them with a list of places to get their carseats inspected free. Just an idea:)

What about a handout that gives information about car seat safety and/or where they might have it checked. I live in Mpls and HCMC offers a free clinic once a month at a fire station (http://www.ci.minneapolis.mn.us/fire/mfdcarseatclinic.asp). We have always been pretty maniacal about proper installation and use and they even corrected ours a bit. Frankly, even if you offend someone, you are acting with the child's best interest in mind, so go ahead and say something.

http://www.car-safety.org/

Check out that website it's full of nothing but carseat techs from around the country and mom's who know alot about carseats. Ask your question on there they're really good. They're to high strung and obsessive for me so I don't go on there anymore but you may like it.

Approaching people with incorrect carseats installations, and use of a carseat is tricky. If a stranger came up to me and started being a know it all I'd be really offended. Yet I feel the same way you do seeing these kids in danger. Sometimes if I know the parent I will just act like I'm playing with the baby and making silly faces and say oh here let me make your straps a little tighter so your safe something like that to where your not being offensive.

I had my daughter in 2001 and I took a carseat safety class/video only because I had a preemie and had to use a carseat bed other than that they would have just let me go without any education.

If you have any handouts from your class (or maybe you can find them on-line) I would suggest handing them out to ALL the parents as just an FYI. Maybe say something like, "This whole car seat safety thing can be so confusing sometimes so I thought I'd just pass along some important information about it." Yes, some of those parents may just be clueless and need a "refresher." Others just might not care, which is sad when you think of all the other dangerous things they are subjecting their children to at home!

I feel the same way! I took that carseat class last year when I was getting my daycare license and then I was just frightened about the whole carseat safety issue. I especially see the car seat handle on the infant carriers up alot in cars. I have figured out that approaching a stranger is a little wacky and generally don't but I do inform my friends and family and my daycare parents when neccessary. I usually just casually say ya know I took that car seat class and then state what ever it is. They are rececptive. I remeber dreading that three hour class thinking I have a child what can they possibly tell me about a car seat for 3 hours, but it was one of the most valuable classes I have taken for my license. Good luck and congrats on getting licensed!

For the love of God, SAY SOMETHING!!! Or report the one that doesn't even buckle the seat into the car. They could get injured without even getting into an accident!!!!!!

Statistically 85-90% of carseats are not used properly, so you are not just imagining things. My friend took a class and she showed me how I was doing it incorrectly. I was so grateful. I thought other people would appreciate the same information, but the people I meontioned it to didn't seem to think it was that important. I learned to just mention that I went to the police department and found it helpful. If people want the info, they will go there. If not, they will ignore it.

The other issue I ran into is that because the buckles are so tight, I have had to listen to complaints from my husband, mother and in laws ever since about how I am going to hurt our children from buckling them in so tight. I even had my carseats inspected at the police department and asked for a note verifying that the buckles were STILL too loose, but everyone thinks that the police are just wrong.

Hospitals just make sure you have a carseat. They don't inspect or even answer questions because of the liability issue. If you want to know if you have done it correctly, you have to take a class or have it inspected at the police department or a special drive up location in your community.

I know a lot of people use the "we never used car seats and we're still here" philosophy, but that is because they were never in a major accident. I remember several families growing up who have children who are NOT still here because they were in an accident with no carseat. I was rear ended a few years ago with my 21 month old daughter in the car and I will forever be grateful that I ignore all the criticizm about how I am too anal about car seat safety.

If you are a day care provider hired by a day care, you should check with them before telling people their carseats are incorrectly used. It puts the day care at a huge liability risk. If it is your day care, you can make that decision.

Good luck,
S.

I agree with the other poster who suggested giving the information to all your parents, whether or not they are on your "list" of those who might not be using the car seat correctly. I would appreciate this info either way if I came to your day care. You could simply say you were passing on the info you learned in your class. Then if you still see problems, you can talk to those parents individually and make suggestions based on the info you handed out. Start the conversation "I see you must not have had time to read the info I provided, you should really improve your childs safety by..."

Good luck!
J.

From a mom with unique kids : )

My kids have always been extremely strong with immense motor skills and they are lean. Amara at 8 mos (she was walking at the time but still wearing 3-6 mos clothes) got herself out of her car seat except for her head while I was driving through Minneapolis on 35W! Amara moved up to unbuckling herself on a regular basis at around 18 mos. I got a special 5 point harness it slowed her down for awhile. Sophie is now 3 and a half and has once gotten completely out of her seat and come up to the front of the van while I was driving. I make compromises with them to stay in their seats with the belts attached as long as they are loose enough that they can bend to reach stuff around them.

My girls started climbing furniture at 9 mos both of them have recently taken to scaling the stop sign in front of our house.

So before you start reporting people keep in mind they may be doing the best they can with the challenges they have to deal with.

PS I have had my seats repeatedly put in by police/ safety people and the girls have them back to their liking within weeks.

and PPS My oldest at 7 is still not 40lbs and yet she rides a school bus 2x a day with no seat belt let alone a booster! This is her 2nd year of doing so. Tell me how can we be so extreme with car seat booster seat demands when the only vehicle Amara rides in all week doesnt even have seat belts.

i think if you approach it in the right way, why not say something to the parent?? they do not give car seat classes when you go to class before having a baby....it is available only if you take the extra effort to get the information. if they are offended, oh well...they may think about it later and adjust the seat. some parents may be appreciative about the information. start with the parents you know...they will know you have their babies safety in mind.

Hi J.,

I totally know what your saying and that's tricky one! I have been known to say things in a passive aggressive way. Like I would say to the baby, "Oh my goodness, I hope you don't slide right out of your seat, those straps are so loose." I have also been known to call the police while I'm in the car if I see a child not in a seat that should be (keep in mind I'm from IL where car seat safety was pretty strict). I guess it's all up to you and what your comfortable with. Good Luck.

I would personally tell the parent their car seat isn't right or the belts are to loose. Mabey they just aren't sure how to properly install them. I am an advocat for carseats. My child would scream the second she touched the car seat. Sometimes that ment driving for three hours straight with her crying. It was better than taking a risk with her life by not having her properly buckled in. It's sad but a lot of people just don't like the inconvience of buckeling their kids in so they just go with out. My eight and a half year old still sits in a booster seat.

Last week I told my neighbor's sister that she did not properly install her childs car seat. I was not embarrassed, nor was she. She was thankful as she thought she installed it correctly. Think of it this way, if you don't say anything and that child is injured or dies, how will you feel. I would not be offended if someone was trying to protect my child.